This reminds me of the story about some old dude’s dog that always shits on my neighbor’s sidewalk. One day neighbor saw that and run to that guy with scary look on his face. He started scolding old guy that he should clean after his dog and old guy respond he’s too old to do that, his back hurt and stuff. The dog saw the whole thing and in a shame he just ate his own shit so poor old man didn’t have to clean it up.
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days. Deuteronomy 22:28-29
Who ever said anything about sheep? But it’s fifty shekels anyway. Damn inflation!
Idk man, fucking a bar of soap, clearly on the reg , and leaving it for the world to see is a bit different. Plus I feel like most dildo users have the presence of mind to put that shit up when they’re done.
That was made that way for the joke. How would you even begin fucking a flat bar of soap? Even pre-drilled, it would wear out too fast to be any fun.
Don’t use conditioner guys!!!
For the 4th time (I’m an idiot) I got serious dick issues. Don’t know if it dries the skin out or what, but the end gets hypersensitive, turns dark red, skin turns black and peels off, hurts like hell, and then you get nice, new pink skin. It’s painful and revolting and takes about a week for the whole process.
Thought was just me until I saw a reddit post a few months back. LOTS of dudes experiencing the same exact thing.
Ball hair is mostly nonexistent. But here come more conditioner tips!
Decided to get nice and clean for my ex-wife. Showered and used a little conditioner on the meat puppet. She stuck it in her mouth and made a face. “Tastes like shampoo!”
That woman could pop the balloon on the sexiest of times. Ever had a lover so tacky as to complain, in the moment?! Not like, “Move a little.”, or “Ouch, not like that.” More like… Know what? Not gonna relive that foul woman.
If the context didn’t provide, I meant jacking off. Paddling the pink canoe. Abusing the wicked stick. Battling the purple-headed yogurt slinger. Shaking hands with the milkman. Boxing the one-eyed champ. Taking the self-guided tour.
Seeing to yourself? Tossing your salad? Clearing the pipes? Sopping your tissues? Summoning Spiderman? Switching to manual? Burping the serpent? Don’t know it.
Even if you accidentally use conditioner instead of lube, there’s no way it will make the skin of your dick turn black and fall off. It’ll irritate your skin sure, but that won’t happen.
One of two things must actually actually be happening…
You’re using the conditioner lube to fuck something like sandpaper or a sex toy that is literally set on fire
You’ve confused conditioner with something like lye or hydrochloric acid
When my sister and I lived with my parents our shower broke for a bit so we had to use my parents’ shower for a few days. Guess who forgot to take their dildo out of there… It was my sister not me but lucky for her and unlucky for me, my parents never clarified so they’ll just think what they will.
Rubbing soap on any part of your body in a way that simulates sex is not “safe”… Especially if that area is your junk.
Edit: when you make a comment of which you can speak on with authority and then a bunch downvotes come because it offended someone’s hypothetical ideal. You guys are worse than /r/the_donald.
I don’t see how masturbating with soap has any increased risk of soap in the urethra than normal washing. Especially when you wash yourself everyday. It would also matter on how often you do it. If you’re jerking it with soap every time you jerk it yeah you increase the likelihood but if it’s a once in a while thing it would be a negligible increase in odds.
I can’t believe I just put that much thought into jerking it with soap.
Men have a similar, although not as sensitive, environment under their foreskin as women do, so it’s not just the urethra that is the issue. That being said, the consequences of that are usually limited to itchiness and a smell, and not a full-blown infection.
You should wash under there with lukewarm water or, if you absolutely feel the need to, gentle soap that is specifically made for cleaning your privates. Doing it with regular soap can cause issues.
Source: Have foreskin, washed with soap, talked with doctor.
I’ve covered that aspect already in other comment chains.
Also this picture is clearly a joke. You wouldn’t be able to actually use that to masturbate as the hole would grow rapidly. You’d have to lather your hands first using either bar or liquid soap.
Yeah jamming your dick into a solid bar of soap is gonna cause a lot of issues. The one I’d imagine being the first to worry about is your dick getting bruised cause bar soap ain’t exactly soft
It doesn’t make sense at first, but your brain has to rationalize it so it comes up with a plausible explanation. It doesn’t have the context to know if that’s the right explanation, so while you’re driving to work and going about your day it’s still trying to process this in the background, quietly pushing you toward an aneurism years later.
4H doesn’t really make sense if you’re from an area where it’s a big thing, but I’ve known a fair number of people who only went to school because of their 4H livestock. Got a buddy who’s a doctor debt free because of a steer.
Have you ever seen a do-it-yourself one without all the flaws and bubbles? If I gave a shit about looking cool in my vehicle I would save up to have it done right.
I have, but those guys were kinda cheating. They had worked as tint installers previously, and knew what they were doing. Did some badass decal applications as well.
There’s something endearing about a young person trying to look cool by being edgy, completely oblivious to the fact that everyone sees through their facade. When a middle aged man is still trying to look cool by being edgy it’s decidedly less endearing.
There’s something endearing about a young person trying to look cool by being edgy, completely oblivious to the fact that everyone sees through their facade.
I’m not IT, just a college instructor, but you’d be amazed at how many Gen Z students have told me that they can’t log into their email because they don’t know their own password. Not even forgot; they don’t even know it in the first place because every device remembers everything for them.
Ease of syncing across devices has me using an internet-based password manager (Bitwarden), but I keep a second local-only password manager (Keepass) that only stores my Bitwarden password. Just in case.
Hey that’s real smart but what if you forget the Keepass password when trying to retrieve the Bitwarden password you forgot lol?
I use Bitwarden myself and love them. Great software great organization it seems. They didn’t even send any bullshit marketing “noooo come back YOULL LOSE EVERYTHING” emails companies love to send when you downgrade from paid to free tier and that right away bumps them up in my mind.
My wife and I also keep our Keepass passwords in each other’s Bitwarden vaults.
So to lose access we’d both have to simultaneously forget our Bitwarden passwords AND be locked out of any biometric login. I consider that sufficiently unlikely.
I’ll be honest as an IT professional of 25 plus years I don’t know .y passwords either but that’s because I let a password manager deal with it for me.
I have had people older than me complain the comp forgot the pass in my desktop days.
There was also it’s cousin. I am definitely meeting the complexity requirements why isn’t it saving
My favorite are the services that keep rejecting the randomized passwords so I have to manually think of a password. I ain’t creative enough on the spot for that! Just accept my /dev/urandom output dammit!
To be fair that is basically what we are trying to get people to do though. Use a good password vault with a single strong password and two factor authentication. All other passwords should be a uniquely generated password for that application.
Like others have said they’re probably using Google as a password manager. When you’re making an account for anything while in the Chrome browser it recommends strong passwords for you such as UjafUif&i$ureT6hj9gzq5hvc$tcgo0be3. Would you memorize it?
I get it, but I also don’t understand the idea of letting Google suggest a random secure password for me. Probably just the Genx/Millenial in me, but I subscribe to the xkcd school of random password generation (password generator), which makes it really easy to have secure passwords that meet complexity requirements and are also easy to memorize.
Yeah, I have my own password generation scheme. Not the most secure thing in the world but I’m at least able to log in to my accounts from other people’s computers. One of these days I’ll get around to using a password manager but I just can’t be bothered.
Definitely. I don’t really do anything that is particularly sensitive, so I only have 3-4 standard passwords (that meet the most common complexity criteria) that I separate by how sensitive the information/service is, but if I truly needed more, I would absolutely be using a 3rd party password vault. I just don’t have the need right now, so I haven’t bothered.
What gets me is the people that don’t know their own passwords, don’t know how/where to look them up, and don’t even understand how to reset their passwords (because they can’t log into their own email). I don’t even know how they function in modern society.
What gets me is the people that don’t know their own passwords, don’t know how/where to look them up, and don’t even understand how to reset their passwords
I worked support for a phone manufacturer for a while and helped a lot of poor lost souls struggle to get back into their Google accounts on their new and replacement devices. I got a lot of them in, but some may have never gotten out of authentication hell
Caring about that has been beaten out of them by increasingly absurd password requirements over dozens of systems. They won’t memorize it, won’t write it down physically, and use the web browser to save it.
“But my system is different, I…”
Nobody cares. The password is just a speed bump in doing the thing they actually want to do.
My kid sister is the same way. Bought her a quest 3 for her bday. Took 3 days to get up and running because a) she had no idea what her meta account passwords were… had always just logged in on her phone… and b) none of the forgot password functions worked because she never cleared her Gmail mailbox so it had filled up and bounced previous facebook emails landing her on their internal do not send list.
ironically I think tech literacy is going down with future gens thanks to so many functions getting automated. Kids aren’t learning how their computers work because it does all of work for them
It’s like that with everything isn’t it? The problems have been off-loaded. In my company for example we used to make our own motors, now we buy them. I doubt there is anyone left who knows how to build one where I work.
I hate to be a “kids these days” person, but you’re absolutely right. My Gen Z students don’t even understand how folder/file structure works; they just download everything onto their desktop and use the search function to find what they need later. If they can’t remember what something was called, they’re SOL.
Don’t get me wrong, I have a lot of faith in Gen Z and Alpha, but their strengths are definitely not the strengths of Millenials or Gen X.
My girlfriend (millenial) is like that as well and it is infuriating. I tell her time and time again, just use a password manager that isn’t the browser’s password manager and you are golden. You just need to remember one “complicated” password, i.e. something with more than 8 characters and that’s it.
The many times she doesn’t know her password to important account is mind boggling.
Tip for anyone using Google Chrome password manager they can access it from any other device by going to passwords.google.com in the browser and logging in (probably best in incognito if not your device).
Unethical life pro tip: want to kill yourself but left something for your family? Buy a life insurance policy, call the suicide prevention hotline and wait for the cops to kill you. Isn’t technically suicide, so the life insurer can’t deny your family claim!!
For those that are genuinely confused, there’s two very important things you must know. The coroner is the job title for the guy who writes up what caused you to die. They do things like autopsies (when required), and they’re basically a doctor for dead people.
The other thing is the English idiom of “paying [someone] off”, which is basically a common way to not so subtley say that you’re bribing them.
So in plain language: there is an extremely good chance that my uncle bribed the coroner to ignore whatever he found on my uncle when he died and say he perished from natural causes. This normally implies something about self deletion and insurance, since insurance basically never pays out if you die by your own hands.
Is anyone still confused? Please let me know if you are and I can address any part of this that might not be crystal clear.
It’s not quite about clearness, but if your uncle did that all by himself that means he must have trusted the coroner a lot. Which is a bit surprising with regard to bribing one, to my mind.
He had fallen in with some questionable types throughout his life, partly due to his work. I won’t get into many details here, I don’t want it to be traced back to his family or anything; but due to the circumstances he found himself in, bluntly, he was worth more dead, than alive. He would only be worth anything if he died “naturally” or something, since life insurance is kind of a stickler for that sort of thing.
All I was told was that he had made arrangements for his body to be found, and around what was going to be done afterwards to ensure that insurance paid out so his family would be taken care of.
The circumstances were kinda BS too, it wasn’t his fault, but he was liable and there was little he could do to change that. He knew what the outcomes were and to him, death was the better option. I’m not saying I agree with his choices. I had no real part in them, I was too young at the time to really grasp what was happening, and appropriately, I was not aware of, nor involved in any of it, and heard most of what I know through my older siblings and from my father (his brother). He apparently sent my dad a note the night before he was found dead basically summarizing what was about to happen, so it was very clearly planned. As far as I’m aware, everything went according to plan and though I don’t have much contact with that part of my family, I believe they’re doing just fine.
Just a touch more detail on the circumstances, it was some legal issue he found himself kind of “holding the bag” for (so to speak) so his outcomes were: (extremely unlikely) he would be found innocent, and allowed to return to his “normal” life - obviously he didn’t think this was possible at all. (most likely) he would be found guilty and sentenced to many years in prison. Being a convict would ruin his chosen vocation as there’s a lot of trust required in what he does and a conviction would basically exclude him from working in his field. (alternatively) he dies, insurance pays out, his family gets a big wad of cash, and he would be just as useless as if he was found guilty; but now with a pretty significant amount of money given to his family.
I don’t hold it against him. I don’t have any strong feelings on the matter. It’s just something that happened.
Cops will still claim it was suicide-by-cop. Which is some top-tier copaganda, because it’s just another way of them saying “if you call us while in distress, there’s a good chance we’ll kill you then blame you for it.”
I kinda legit want to check the conditions of my current life insurance policies regarding suicide. Not because I want to off myself today, but because I do want to off myself if I get the stage four diagnosis or some such thing.
Gates is just as evil as Musk, he is just better at it. Gates played a pivotal role in making sure the vaccine’s stayed under patent. Even when American farma didn’t have the capacity to produce enough and Indian factories had over capacity. The irony is that he did this using his position in the Bill and Melinda Gates foundation, that tells you all you need to know about billionaire philanthropy.
Even before any of the vaccines were finished, there were plans to not grant them any patent protection so they can be produced and distributed as widely as possible. Gates and his foundation lobbied hard against that and instead came up with the bullshit plan to have rich countries buy vaccines for poor countries, which helped no one but the insane profits of the pharma companies. In the case of the vaccine developed with public funding by the Oxford University, Gates actively talked them out of releasing it with an open license, so they sold it to AstraZeneca instead.
Don’t waste your breath. I’m done with this platform. I hoped it would deliver what reddit couldn’t, but I was wrong.
I don’t think I’ll ever find another platform that encouraged such measured responses. Every thing is either team red or team blue. I just hate how much people are willing ignore so their side can win. Maybe that’s just all of the internet now. That’s fine, it’s just that it’s no longer for me.
^(Edit: I agree with this person for what it’s worth.)
I just hate how much people are willing ignore so their side can win.
Sad that your side lacks representation? Or is it a lack of conviction with your own opinions?
Nobody wins a discussion because it’s not a competition, and your words aren’t going convince anyone who doesn’t want to be convinced. There’s never been a time when one could seek divine cognition from the mouth breathing troglodytes that make up the bulk of the bell curve.
The problem isn’t the people, it’s your expectations.
I don’t have a side. My personal politics is a shit mix that trends left. I feel like a leper wherever I go when I’m not ready to commit 100% to what either group is saying. I was just frustrated when I wrote that, I apologize.
I find it strange that you’ve said this to one of the only comments that actually provided quotes of multiple articles that weren’t just opinion pieces. It’s also a bit odd that you’re “done with this platform” due to a relatively centrist position that mostly amounts to “it doesn’t seem like Bill Gates is James Bond Supervillain level evil.”
In fact, generally both the blue and red “teams” (of the US) kinda hate Gates, just for different reasons. Someone coming out, reading the article linked by the comment that they’re responding to, and then providing reasonable counter-evidence is actually a bit of a breath of fresh air compared to typical Reddit or Lemmy, or the internet in general for that matter.
And to be clear, I really don’t have a stake in the game here. I’m mildly interested to see whether Gates is as bad as others in this thread are saying, but coming into it I didn’t really have much of an opinion one way or the about the guy. Now, I’m just curious what has made you feel that the commenter you responded to couldn’t deliver what Reddit somehow did or does.
Sorry, it’s been a tough couple of weeks and I was just frustrated. Layoffs finally got to me in the aftermath of the actors strike (leaderships reasoning, not mine because I actually saw what was going on internally).
I can’t tell sometimes if I’m trading one echo chamber for another. Reality is just bizarre sometimes. I had someone arguing with me about code in a video game. I wrote the code almost 10 years ago. I know reddit was just as bad, if not worse for that “loudest persons right” way of commenting. Usually it gets mixed in with a dash of hive mentality.
I know those points are all loosely related, I’m exhausted after working insane hours through the year with no vacation just to be dumped before the holidays. I need to unplug for a week or two I think.
Edit: Wait, about the comment I replied to? Yeah my bad. I’ve been avoiding disagreeing with people directly after I got harassed several months ago. I was really happy with that person’s comment, I was just a miserable prick at the time. I had to leave some communities and almost nuked my account when another lemmy instance unleashed their bots: every post I would walk into would be targeted and voted down into oblivion. You’d lose all visibility within a short period of time.
I’m not sure if there’s been work done since to address this, but I totally understand if they’re still not ready to tackle it. They are a volunteer crew after all. I should follow the repo on Github. Maybe there’s some small stuff I could help out with while I’m looking for work.
You should stick to this platform over Reddit solely because you don’t get silenced here for your opinion when it conflicts with fragile, self-important moderators. Blue team / Red team is the natural tendency of all contentious issues, not the fault of the platform.
Sorry, it’s been a tough couple of weeks and I was just frustrated. Layoffs finally got to me in the aftermath of the actors strike (leaderships reasoning, not mine because I actually saw what was going on internally).
I can’t tell sometimes if I’m trading one echo chamber for another. Reality is just bizarre sometimes. I had someone arguing with me about code in a video game. I wrote the code almost 10 years ago. I know reddit was just as bad, if not worse for that “loudest persons right” way of commenting. Usually it gets mixed in with a dash of hive mentality.
I know those points are all loosely related, I’m exhausted after working insane hours through the year with no vacation just to be dumped before the holidays. I need to unplug for a week or two I think.
Welcome to the club. Also got dumped after years of service, just before the holidays. Software devs, we do all the work, but have the least job security.
That’s always been his MO. He literally used to be a eugenicist (likely still is privately) until the backlash from that started threatening his career, and all of a sudden he flip flopped and started pretending that eugenics doesn’t even exist let alone him being a vocal part of it.
Idk who downvoted you, I guess people who think the problem with Musk is that he’s cringy or like a cartoon supervillain. No, all billionaires are evil. If you think Gates is a good guy that’s because you don’t understand what it takes to be a billionaire, what he does with his “charity”, or the history of how he’s run his business or destroyed antitrust purely because he was embarrassed at how bad he looked under cross examination. He has the charity specifically to launder his image, and as a result he’s found ways to be evil using it as cover that he wouldn’t have found back in his embrace, extend and extinguish days.
EDIT: Also behind the bastards did episodes on both these absolute jackoffs:
Gates at least does something. Yea all rich people charities are tax evasion schemes, but at least he does something. Musk kills turtles and strokes his rocket to it.
The only thing Gates does is use his foundation to avoid taxes. He’s not any better than other billionaires. The entirety of billionaire philanthropy is a massive lie. www.youtube.com/watch?v=OH4uh8cHuto
So Mr gates is special because… he’s your special favorite guy? Because last time I checked almost all billionaires give to charities and foundations. Something is not anything just because you declare it, no matter how hard you emphasize it. There is absolutely nothing unique or special about his giving versus anyone else’s. You’re really acting like he’s the only rich pedo to ever start a 501c3. Gates shills sure out hard today.
Again, all rich ppl charities are money laundering. It has to do with how economics (epecially usa taxes) work. And those charities are useless, even more then carbon offsets.
I never said Gates is the greatest angle to ever grace us, all i said is that he is not a completely heartless cunt of a person like Jeff or Elon.
And it’s not about giving charities, it’s about the initiatives.
Also go fuck yourself. I can talk shit about Gates for hours. I’m just not an extremist to see only black or white. Cunt.
Inside any important philanthropy meeting, you witness heads of state meeting with investment managers and corporate leaders. All are searching for answers with their right hand to problems that others in the room have created with their left.
Charity just means your special interest gets what would otherwise be tax dollars. There’s nothing democratic about charity. It’s just churched up oligarchy.
It’s worse then that for the very rich. Their “charities” are made up of their friends and family, and the money eventually circles back to them. It’s literally tax evasion.
I’m sorry but Musk’s rockets are probably the most environmentally friendly. There was the dust cloud in orbital flight test 1 but it’s definitely not as bad as some other launches from other organisations. Rockets fail and that’s not a problem if you fail intentionally.
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