Not really a “hack” but I don’t know why most people get into phone contracts.
Since college, I have always just bought unlocked phones with cash and then used the carrier’s prepaid plans and set it to auto pay.
I pay so much less than most people I know, I get all the same service, and my phone isn’t tied to a contract or carrier, so I can cancel my plan whenever I want and switch to another carrier by just buying their SIM card for ~$20.
My current phone is an unlocked Pixel 6a that I got on sale new for $300. I have unlimited talk, text, and data for $45 a month. And if I get sick of my current carrier or they bump my cost, I can just switch to anybody else for just the cost of a $20 SIM card.
I have so many friends and family members that complain about their phone bills being super high and their service sucking, but they can’t cancel their contracts without paying off their huge balances plus the interest and usually cancelation fees. Plus, because their phone is tied to the contract/carrier, they can’t even keep transfer the phone to the new carrier and have to get sucked into a “phone trade-in” deal and the cycle continues.
And for the folks saying that most people can’t afford to save up and buy a phone outright, there are a lot of places that offer payment plans for the phone, or you can buy it on credit and pay it off that way, which would likely be less interest over time. Or you could buy unlocked used/refurbished phones for 25-50% off their normal price.
Maybe it makes sense if you get a stipend from your company, or you bundle it with a bunch of other packages like cable TV or internet, but for just a cell phone, I just don’t get locking yourself into a crazy contract.
Google Fi is a god-tier service for traveling abroad. When I went to South America I paid nothing extra vs my friends who had to deal with Verizon’s ridiculous travel plan fees.
Because people want the latest iPhone or Samsung and paying $ per month works better for them than $$$ upfront. The alternate finance method you speak of isn’t very well known, so it’s most simple to contract with a carrier.
Part of the problem is that we’re advertised at constantly, so when the latest, greatest iPhone or Galaxy or Pixel comes along we feel like we need it. Because if we get the £1200 phone the resell value in two years will still be high, right? It actually makes sense.
But the only way to afford that is to borrow the money to pay for it.
I picked up an iPhone 13 mini last year, on a two year contract, for £29 a month. And that’s ok by me. By the end of my contract I’ll go SIM-only and my bill will drop to around £10 a month, which I’ll rock until Apple finally release another mini phone.
So this 13 mini will be the last phone I ever use…
This seems like an American problem. This used to be the case in the Netherlands as well but over the years people have learned that SIM-only subscriptions are so much easier and cheaper that the majority of people now use SIM-only. In fact I know of no one around me that does it differently.
Also $45 per month is still expensive lol. I pay €12 a month. Sure, not unlimited but I never call or SMS so the 100 a month I get for that is way more than enough and I never finish the 10GB of data a month either. I can make either unlimited for really not that much more.
I believe a major factor in this was a ruling by the Hoge Raad that a “free” phone with a contract is unlawful and is actually a loan. Carriers now have to list the price for the phone and for the service separately, so it’s a lot more clear what the costs of the phone are.
Also, a “free” phone is now registered as a loan with monthly recurring costs, which impacts for example the maximum mortgage you can get on a home.
France is a bit similar, but a new phone company decided to cut down the costs by not providing a phone. 20 € a month formore data than you’ll ever need or 50 € a month with the latest iPhone included everyone chooses the first option
Also in the Netherlands and I have recently extended this concept to my home internet. Since 25 Mbps download / 10 Mbps upload is enough for my use, I no longer have an internet subscription and I make use of $25 LycaMobile unlimited data sim cards for home internet using a sim router. The IMEI of the router can be easily modified, which is also a plus.
The IP is dynamic, but for my self-hosted services that require a static IP I make use of a WireGuard tunnel between my raspberry pi and a virtual private server. The VPS has a static IP, so my domains point at the VPS and then the VPS re-routes the packets via the wireguard tunnel. In a wire guard tunnel only the server needs a static IP, so the VPS can route packets to the client even if the client’s ip is dynamic.
Ok is toch iets te gecompliceerd voor me, en aangezien de vrouw graag vaste TV heeft zit ik zowieso nog wel even aan de KPN vast. Maar ik heb je comment opgeslagen, aangezien ik toch wel benieuwd ben en wil kijken of het op termijn. Dank iig!
I was recently comparing some phone plans and found that nowadays, you mostly just pay the actual price of the device, plus the normal subscription costs, no interest or anything.
Got a Pixel 8 Pro from Odido (awful service btw, would not go with them again). The device costs me 30 euros per month, for 2 years, which comes out to 720 euros at the end. That’s actually cheaper than the normal resale price of ~870 (average according to Tweakers).
Actually thinking about it now, I wonder what the catch is. That kinda seems too good to be true.
But who actually does this otherwise? I have seen those kind of contracts advertised, but I never see people actually having them, apart from some 16yo who want the new iPhone by all means and this is the only way they can finance it.
It’s different in the UK. Those who need a new phone but have limited funds usually buy a cheap or refurbished or used one and get a 12 month SIM only contract.
I get 30G data per month, which is more than enough, and unlimited calls and texts which almost all UK contracts have. Some providers offer free EU roaming as well. I pay £10pm.
I use Vodafone but I never buy through them, they are very expensive. I search around but for me Carphone Warehouse are always as cheap as anyone else and their CS is excellent.
Maybe I’m misunderstanding something but here in Australia there’s no benefit to not having a contract.
With our largest telco the contract is really just repayments on the phone. 24x monthly repayments is always the same price the phone is retailing for outright. You could cancel the sim and just keep up the phone repayments if you wanted.
Interesting. Seems like my situation is pretty specific to the US. Lots of folks from other countries that seem to have much cheaper options by default.
If you go prepaid for a year you can get service for even cheaper. I don’t need unlimited data so I buy a year of Mint Mobile’s cheapest plan for about 200 dollars which gives unlimited talk and text and 5gb data for only around 15 dollars a month.
I should clarify that mint mobile also has “unlimited” and “unnecessary” plans for 30 and 40 dollars a month respectfully. (When prepaying for a year)
Quote: Unlimited plan incl. 40GB high-speed data w/10GB hotspot. Unnecessary plan incl. 60GB high-speed data w/20GB hotspot. Video @ 480p. Data speeds reduced after monthly allotment. Taxes & fees extra.
Victorinox Swiss Army Knife. It’s still kicking. The amount of times I’ve used it, it saves so much time than looking for the proper dedicated tool.
A metal wallet. Definitely worth it if you don’t carry a lot. Mine is maybe 10 years old now or more.
3+ year old used Lenovo Thinkpads, these things are great if you need a budget laptop that’s not for gaming. A lot of companies lease them. When the lease expires you can get them very cheap because they flood the market.
General Military Surplus. We have a shop a few kilometers a way that sells surplus. They get in brand new stuff all the time. Still in packaging. It’s built well. Keep in mind military surplus isn’t just in the field stuff. Laptop bags, shirts, blankets, hats.
A pet. Worth every penny. Got my cat from a shelter, he’s been there for me through thick and thin. Gives great hugs.
Trying to convince mine, she keeps buying these expensive cartridges that she ends up throwing out after a few times or they get left out and their little soap bars fuse to stuff. They suck.
no the alumawalletesqe things have basically a plastic accordian inside. Thats what dies and its all one sorta unit. The one bej linked looks like it would not have an issue being it is a sort of card clip almost.
My first thought was some military gear as well. A scarf or travel utensils or bag or something. Actually even the gloves I got are probably over 20 years old.
Rescued pets cats be priceless, though keeping them fed and healthy and happy can cost a fair bit.
ebay is a good source though more expensive, places like marketplace often have decent deals, check out electronics recyclers and wholesalers, if you have any. Those are generally good places to look.
Definitely look into European universities if you can afford the plane tickets. I wish I had as a young adult – I’ve heard great things about education quality as well as affordability.
I figured this was going to be somebody wanting to talk about his politics or something like that but no it’s just a pedantic Englishman pissed that people are using the wrong title
That always ends up happening. Whenever a government has being in power for too long they start to break into 90 different factions and spend their entire time fighting each other, and not getting anything else done.
Also a certain group of the Conservatives have started to play by the Republican Party playbook, while the rest of them are politely asking if maybe they could not be fascists? Of course appeasement never works so apparently the next best option is to have giant arguments about it and replace the PM every 10 minutes.
Fortunately Labour are another party, and regardless of what you think about them as a party, they are at least different and are less fractional currently, so perhaps now we can get something done.
Paraglider pilot here, so I landed among the cow my fair share of times.
Cows are curious but shy, if you walk slowly they might come to have a look, if they get too close, something like clapping your hands is enough to have them running away. However, if the farmer didn’t took the veals the yet, they can be pretty agressive to protect their kids, in that case forgot what I said about “clapping your hand” and stay away from the herd. Note also that bull are less shy than cow.
I feel like there’s a lot of these, where someone says “how do you explain [extremely basic, everyday thing] without [religion]?”, it’s kinda weird. Like being a certain level of religious makes you immune to all common sense.
I think what they are trying to say is that the emotional experience they have when they look at a sunset is similar to the emotional experience that gives them conviction that there is a God. It's not a statement of objective fact about the universe and its processes; it's a statement about their mental and emotional life and how they want to feel inside their own head.
Although, maybe they are saying that no one knows how sunsets work and so therefore a wizard did it. I would hope it is that first thing though.
I feel like it has to be the second thing, but not everyone has those religious experiences, and even the religious don’t always correlate these things to God. It just requires so many layers of weird assumption that I really don’t know what to think.
There, you’re starting to get it! That’s exactly what the religious do. Get confused, start using “god did it” as a gap filler in their knowledge, and soon, they “know” less than nothing.
In my experience of these zealot types, it's that they don't want to know the answer, and won't accept any answer that isn't literally bulletproof all the way back to the beginning of time - no matter what you tell them, God did it.
It's like playing a pigeon at chess. It'll shit on the board and then strut around like it won.
Well that’s a fairly consistent pov. “God of the Gaps” is what it’s called. Ostensibly, that sort of person accepts new evidence for things, so it’s probably not one of the worst ways to think
But that's not what I'm talking about, nor are those the types of people I'm talking about - people willing to take in new ideas are a much friendlier bunch.
The zealot types, the self-proclaimed "sceptics" don't just avoid learning about science, they actively oppose it. They ask questions like those @Ibaudia said not because they want to know the answer, but because they're trying to sow seeds of doubt into those who see them.
Those questions aren't made for you or I to answer - and if you do try, they'll shout you down or sandbag you until you give up.
won’t accept any answer that isn’t literally bulletproof
Quite fitting, then, that the Venn diagram of people who would literally shoot bullets at a question and people who are religious is pretty much a circle 😉
These are emotional people with absolutely no care or enjoyment for reason or logic or learning how the world works. I believe strongly that the way our brains develop as we grow, be it influences from environment or genes or upbringing, just can go in radically different directions. Kind of like how some people have no internal monologue, or some people can’t visualize images in their mind, I think some people can’t comprehend the world outside of a very “mystical” interpretation, even when taught how physics and evolution work, they still will see those forces as expressions of a mystical universe with a personal, subjective God who is trying to communicate with them.
You absolutely cannot reason with this kind of perspective because it’s not one of reason. The MOST you can hope for is getting them to feel something, and in this I have only ever found common ground in things like expressions of love for the universe or the beauty of nature, but that’s like one person going to the baseball game to watch the game, and the other to eat the food.
I believe strongly that the way our brains develop as we grow, be it influences from environment or genes or upbringing, just can go in radically different directions.
(instance admin here, but for a small one) woof well, for me, I agree, but I wouldn’t use that wording.
Lemmy for sure isn’t a plug and play site. Setting it up took leaps and bounds, learning way more about nginx than I ever really cared to, and figuring out documentation that was very clearly out of date. Very little logging or error messaging exists to help with that problem.
Very little errors exist at all, it’s very much a “happy path” project. That’s why we get constant spinners everywhere, because when an HTTP error occurs there’s no actual error message. (Come on guys, just add it to your standard HTTP messages, if statusCode < 200 || >= 300 then show a toast message).
But yeah, the moderation tools have to be the worst. Lemmy has an amazing development group that’s separate from the main developers who have patched together a good set of tools, from automods to CSAM and illegal scanning, huge props to them - but these issues are routinely ignored by the main devs. I was shocked, honestly shocked that when we were under CSAM attacks that there was not an immediate roundtable of the head devs to try to solve the problem officially. Here was a problem that 99% of countries would immediately and gladly throw us, the instance admins, in jail over and they just handwaved it away. In fact, I don’t know that there was ever an official post about it, or even that there are things coming to help with it.
I love Lemmy and being here, and the devs have done a great job at building this platform for us, but we’re at a critical point right now. It’s no longer software that is just fun side projects and building stuff that looks cool, it has some real issues now that it has a real userbase. I’m definitely one to say “But it’s FOSS, and other people can pick up and submit a PR” - but it also says something when the head devs just completely ignore a massively huge issue with it.
Bugs and caches and that sort of thing I can overlook. Those I can wait on and see them get smoothed out over time. Actual issues that could land me in jail or get the feds to beat down my door? Those I kind of expect a fast response.
So, I’ll say I’m extremely conflicted. I want to host lemmy long term, and I’m happy to bring the fediverse to a few more people, but the csam attacks really altered my view of the devs.
Edit - because my favorite manager said “Bring me solutions, not problems” a few things that would really help immediately -
Integrate db0’s CSAM checker natively, more or less a plug and play option, or a checkbox. His checker sits at an endpoint. The admin page of lemmy could easily have you plop in the endpoint and it would start checking
Have an image management portal, with capabilities to:
Auto remove images after X time (to help with ballooning storage costs)
Perma-delete images and users (maybe blurred too if the CSAM checker flagged it, so I don’t need eye bleach) (Edit again, 0.19.4 might have fixed this, I need to upgrade so I’ll see)
Federating image purges, so one purge on one server will force purge it on everyone else’s
~~Disabling of caching other server’s images ~~ (Edit again, I see 0.19.4 just dropped which has this, so this is good). This way I’m only responsible for my own users.
View images that are not related to a post (DM’d messages that I’m hosting, or people just uploading images to my site)
Bring in a logging system into the UI itself, so I can keep tabs on the error logs. I can pipe them somewhere, but this would be a major plus as an admin
I’m not sure it’s that difficult to follow. If you offer a service in the EU, you are responsible for your server deleting personal data (or, even better, not even hosting it in the fist place!); you are not responsible for other people not deleting their copy of personal data.
But I’m not that well-informed in the actual legalese so my best understanding is the big issue is the EU’s definition of “provide service to the EU” more than anything else. They seem to think that just because your users might upload a local copy of a picture of someone from the EU, even if you yourself are not allowing connections from the EU, then you are serving to the EU. And with how nazi the EU has been going lately with stuff like ChatControl, the last thing I’d want as an instance owner is to be upheld to arbitrary boomers’ (lack of) understanding of technology.
The introduction of a plugin system seems interesting here, though it’s still alpha and basically looking for feedback from would-be plugin developers
AFAICT, there’s no established way for a plugin to surface affect the UI, which would be a somewhat unwieldy problem anyway due to the apps and frontends ecosystem. Probably the best path for any plugin that provides a UI would be to have a system for aggregating links to plugin UIs.
With something like that in place, plugins and other services that just use the DB/API, could really go a long way to filling these holes, if they haven’t already.
So it seems that the work needed here is perhaps “distribution” work … where there’s a more “plug and play” Lemmy distribution with plugins etc bundled?
This is what excites me the most. There are huge potentials for plugins, and I think it’ll ease some of the strain from the core engineers. Most of the “ideas” I see posted really could be plugins. Things like badges on posts, verification of links, etc etc could all be plugins that individuals could make. The problem with developing against the core repo is that you have to learn and understand the core repo, so you don’t fuck up something else in some other place accidentally. Plugins are a neat way where we can say “I’m a function that does one thing, just do the thing here, and then do what you need to with that data”
The bit I’m conceptually stuck on (not know much at all about how a good plugin architecture would work) is how a plugin can surface or affect the UI, especially in an ecosystem with multiple UIs/Apps/Frontends, and, a federated ecosystem at that.
Given the apps, I figure it’s not possible without a convention of plugins providing APIs which apps can then implement against when available, which adds a good amount of complexity but should be viable for popular/useful plugins. Though, tangentially, this does affirm for me that the whole native mobile app expectation is a bit of a trap for a social system like the fedi (as webUIs are naturally more universal and maleable).
So, for immediate results, I can see only two options:
a plugin operates on the backend directly manipulating or creating content not unlike a bot
a plugin provides its own webUI which is made available through a simple and dedicated location in the UI
Is there something I’m missing about how a plugin system could work?
but we’re at a critical point right now. It’s no longer software that is just fun side projects and building stuff that looks cool, it has some real issues now that it has a real userbase. I’m definitely one to say “But it’s FOSS, and other people can pick up and submit a PR” - but it also says something when the head devs just completely ignore a massively huge issue with it.
This is a general issue I think, not just for lemmy but the whole fediverse (whatever one’s opinions might be on particular priorities).
It’s all non-profit and being run and built at a much smaller scale than many users would appreciate (I think). Sure there are plenty of people here, but not that many. Combined with no obvious revenue streams, such as ads or subscription fees, there really is only so much that can be done. Some time last year even the Mastodon team (by far the most successful fediverse platform) admitted that they didn’t have the capacity to work on new things for a while … they were just busy keeping things running. And they are (apparently) notorious at being slow to ship new features. Meanwhile platforms like firefish just straight up died last year.
So yea, it might be a critical point, for sure. But putting more on the core dev teams may not be the answer for the simple reason that it’s just not viable in the long run.
If we enjoy the bigger community focus and open and non-profit organisations that makeup the fediverse, the “answer” at this critical point might be to find a way to give back somehow … to organise, build communities, run fund-raising campaigns, think of ideas for more sustainable funding, find devs who can help etc etc. It’s perhaps onerous and annoying, even to read perhaps … but this is likely the tradeoff we have to make for a place like this.
I fully understand that, and I explained it in my reply to nutomic. It’s not that I wanted to just pile on, but rather at an emergency like that, an all-stop would have been justified in my opinion, to stop all work and go into emergency “What can we all do to stop this and prevent it”. All other issues were secondary in that moment compared to stopping CSAM, and it didn’t feel that way. They added it to the pile of issues, and I’m glad to see changes came out, but in that moment I didn’t see much if any support from them
I personally appreciate the push the core devs make for a “less demanding” relationship between users and open source devs. I think they have a point and it’s good for long term sustainability and I’ll probably find myself defending it.
But I like you’re framing, and in retrospect it seems (as is usually the case) that some people organising was what was missing just to get everyone helping each out as much and efficiently as possible. While any member of the community can (and should) do that, at some point it makes sense for the core devs to take on a task like that, I agree.
But yeah, the moderation tools have to be the worst. Lemmy has an amazing development group that’s separate from the main developers who have patched together a good set of tools, from automods to CSAM and illegal scanning, huge props to them - but these issues are routinely ignored by the main devs. I was shocked, honestly shocked that when we were under CSAM attacks that there was not an immediate roundtable of the head devs to try to solve the problem officially. Here was a problem that 99% of countries would immediately and gladly throw us, the instance admins, in jail over and they just handwaved it away. In fact, I don’t know that there was ever an official post about it, or even that there are things coming to help with it.
My impression at the time was that admins were handling the CSAM wave just fine with existing mod tools and through Matrix chats. A roundtable wouldnt have solved anything except make people feel good. Besides we still were extremely busy at the time to scale up Lemmy and resolve problems revealed by the huge amount of new users. Keep in mind that Lemmy is still at version 0.x which means that its not feature complete. So if something is missing that you find important, consider waiting a year or two and checking back then. Or get it implemented yourself, thats what open source is all about.
That said most of the features you mentioned have already been implemented, including a list of all locally uploaded images.
I was not handling it fine, it was generally chaotic, and in the Matrix chats I remember it being chaotic, for both attacks. Luckily by the second one we had db0’s tooling to help a bit more, but there still many of us who were exposed to the images. We lost a lot of instances during those two attacks from admins who justifiably didn’t want to take on the risk.
I completely understand how crazy it was, but the lack of response from you guys was disheartening, it really did make me wonder if I should continue hosting or if I should bail out. Ultimately, I decided to stay obviously, but had to do some hard extra steps, like reducing privacy and registering with the feds for CSAM.
So like I said, I’m torn. I respect you guys for everything you do, but that was a moment where all other development should have stopped to immediately address a real problem, and while you think a roundtable would have just been feel good, I think we could have kept a lot of instances online if it had been done. Assurances that yes, new changes are coming, and official suggestions like “Here are the endpoints to delete the images”, or nominating db0 or someone as the person in charge of the outbreak. It was honestly a scary time, and for us owners who accept a lot of risk, for many of them it was too much.
Anyway, I have a habitual case of foot in mouth disease, so it was immediately after posting that comment that I heard about 0.19.4, and immediately felt stupid. I tried it last night but I kept getting timeout errors and something about “Could not get user’s /inbox” or something, I’ll try 0.19.5 today. Thank you for bringing additional mod tools, they’ve been hugely needed. I know they’re not glamorous to make, but they keep the communities healthy and strong.
The entire time after the Reddit migration was extremely chaotic. I dont remember when exactly the CSAM attacks happened, but around that time we were already very exhausted from all the urgent work we had to do on scaling, patching security vulnerabilities and fixing countless bugs. I also dont remember receiving any requests from admins to help out with this. So if you notice something similar in the future, feel free to message me directly. Anyway we are only two people working full-time on Lemmy, and have lots of different tasks to take care of. So it gets very difficult to give everything the attention it deserves, and to prioritize things correctly.
I honestly think you peeps need to somehow invest in your communication strategy somehow. Such communication breakdowns is/was causing schisms in the lemmy community which is an extreme shame as that’s in turn driving away the same potential contributors that would help the software improve faster to cover these same points. I would argue that saying things like “we’re still in beta, come back in 2 years if you can’t handle the heat” is not doing you any favours. I know you are technically correct, but there’s no reason to phrase it like that, yanno? Not everyone interprets such statements the same way and for non-ASD/ADHD people, this can parse very hostile and confrontational, even if you honestly didn’t mean it to be read like that.
Apologies in advance for the unsolicited advice, but have you considered reaching our for some community outreach person to join your team? Such positions won’t necessarily fill themselves and you need to ask for it. But at this point I think it might significantly help the lemmy project avoid such drama.
How else would you say this? And who do you suggest reaching out to? Keep in mind that it would have to be a volunteer position as we dont have the funds to pay for it.
I feel like people already see me around a lot, I would avoid being “overexposed” if that makes sense.
Maybe someone with less activity on Lemmy would be better for that job?
At the end of the day, it’s mostly to discuss with you guys how to present things to the audience, and being more present when issues like the CSAM issues arise, potentially even switching priorities to convey the message to the community that this issue was serious and that you were aware of it.
Again, I’m not saying you guys didn’t do anything, but as always, it’s mostly on how to communicate in a situation rather than having a look at what was done or not.
If I had the skills and the time, I would. But I’m an AuDHD tech-nerd, and vastly unsuited and unsuitable for such a role. The point is not to ask the specific people making this suggestion as a gotcha, it’s to recognize there’s a problem area which might be solved with another volunteer with the right skillset and take the steps to find one. To put it another way, you are already painfully cognizant that lemmy needs some DB attention. There’s no point in asking people who bring up performance issues if they can do the necessary DB work, but there is a point in making an open call for people with DB optimization expertise. Does this make sense?
Having another volunteer also means more work for us, as we need to communicate with this person regularly. It also means that we maintainers get more removed from the users, and wont be able to talk with them directly anymore. And in my experience, volunteers are very motivated in the beginning, but most of them get bored or busy after a while and then you need to find someone new again. Not really worth the hassle in this case.
Also the database issues mentioned in this thread may simply be from lack of ram.
Yes I understand that. I meant making an open call for volunteers on that aspect. Note that I’m in the same boat with my own FOSS project where it’s not always easy to find the volunteers, but at least I don’t have the same pressures as you face on this area. Not saying this is going to be an easy fulfillment, but it can be perhaps something to pursue.
How else would you say this?
Note that I’m AuDHD, so I’m not the best person to actually do these things. It’s because I know my limitations that I have compensated by learning to notice these pitfalls in communication. I would also need someone to help me in the same situation as you.
Nevertheless, If I were to speculate, I wouldn’t even go in that direction. From what I’ve seen, most people who know what they’re doing in this aspect will just say something like “we acknowledge the issue and we’ll do what we can to handle it asap” or whatever, just so people don’t feel left in the cold, you know? Again, don’t take what examples I write as the exact practice as it’s not my area of expertise. I’m just (badly) parroting what I saw work better.
Its easy to say this now, more than half a year later. But youre ignoring that we were completely overworked and exhausted back then. That said Im taking your feedback into account and will hopefuly to handle it better in the future.
I think because guys are pound for pound stronger than girls. I’ve read stories on Reddit years ago by girls who are wrestlers or fighters and get into a playful tussle with some random guy and they describe it as terrifying.
Like, there are women out there with higher testorone than the average man, and crazy is a huge factor.
I played rugby in college and we hung out with the women’s team and drunk coed wrestling was definitely a common thing.
Every once and a while a non rugby player would think it was just an excuse to roll around with a hot chick, and they would get absolutely demolished. Like I’m not talking about underestimating the woman and losing quickly due to technical skill. Just getting absolutely manhandled by a girl without the socially ingrained fear of violence and pain. Like, I was one of the biggest guys on the men’s team and had wrestling experience, I still lost to some of them. Women almost a foot shorter and that I had more than 50 pounds on. Because they really wanted that W and kept trying till they got it.
Hell, for two years we had coed practice including full speed tackling and scrimmages. Top end speed was usually the only clear difference, and even then the fastest five players on the field was never all guys.
There was a story on Reddit from a soldier, his squad ended up in a fight with rugby players in a bar in Australia and after the fight they had a drink together and when a soldier told the players they were pretty brave to start fighting people in the army, they replied “the only people we fear is women who play rugby”.
Like, there are women out there with higher testorone than the average man
No, that doesn’t happen, the adrenal glands and ovaries do not produce enough t to reach even very low male levels, testosterone for the most part is produced in the testicules which cis women do not have. that much testosterone would transition a woman into a man, they would grow beard and get a deeper voice, that’s how HRT works for FtMs.
She’s not talking about gender he’s talking about sex. Someone born with testicles with XY chromosomes is always going to produce more testosterone than someone born with ovaries with XX chromosomes - assuming both sexual organs are functioning as expected.
A whole bunch of shit while ignoring all the contex…
I’m talking about 18-22 year olds and the women are on the women’s rugby team comparing them to men who have never needed to shave and their voice hasn’t cracked.
If you think every 18-22 year old guys has been thru puberty…
That’s as ridiculous as not understanding that hight T women would be attracted to high level athletics and then overly represented in elite athletes.
What you are doing is the equivalent of someone who stops paying attention to science in sixth grade but believes they’re an expert at 47.
You got the cliff notes version and think people should address you as Doctor.
A high T woman is 70 ng/dL and that already is starting to imply some sort of adrenal tumor or polycystic ovary syndrome. The normal range is a lot closer to 20~30
A low T man is 250 ng/dL and average is around 400500 ng/dL
A woman will not have T levels similar to men because they don’t have testicles. Even the highest T females compared to lowest T men.
The only time this would be true is in 1 in 10 million cases. If that’s your whole argument, then OK. It is theoretically possible if the woman has an adrenal tumor and the man is effectively castrated.
But for virtually all other cases this simply cannot happen due to human physiology.
Which, if you haven’t noticed, is still the age range of a lot of Olympians and elite athletes.
Hell, some sports average under 18.
It’s like you didn’t even read my comment. You’re just fucking insisting everything fits in your nice little division of two piles and no one else can exist.
It’s the same line of thinking as transphobes…
And I have no desire to ever interact with people stuck in that thinking. And immediately regret trying to help you understand the finer points.
No I don’t understand what you mean about 18-22. What difference does that make?
18-22 is a fully sexually mature adult. The testicles and ovaries are already functional by 14 in overwhelming majority of the population.
And yes I’m putting everything into two piles. Either you have testicles or you don’t. If you have functioning testicles, you will always have more T than someone who doesn’t.
No it’s not? You’re saying things that don’t make sense, if you’re assigned female at birth you have ovaries (assuming no intersex condition) if you’re assigned male at birth you have testicules (assuming same thing)
The ovaries produce estrogen (in three different forms E2 is the most important) And progesterone. The testicules produce testosterone and testosterone can decay into dihydrotestosterone (DHT)
If an individual has more estrogen they will have a female phenotype (essentially they will look like a woman have breasts soft skin etc…)
If an individual has more Testosterone and DHT they will have a male phenotype. ( More strength, stronger jaw, more body hair, going bald in a lot of cases)
I’m a Trans woman, the point of hormone replacement therapy is to take my testosterone away and give me estrogen instead, after a while (and possibly some surgeries for bone structure) I’ll look like a woman, because that’s what hormones do. In the same vein since I don’t have T in my blood anymore I am losing strength, and my body hair is getting thinner (although if it could hurry up a bit!) there’s nothing transphobic about acknowledging that happens, it’s literally the desired effect!
If you’re still confused about NB people just know that some do take cross sex hormones to achieve a more androgynous look.
What personal experience am I dismissing? Please explain. I’m talking about human anatomy. The organ that produces testosterone are the testicles. Ovaries produce a token amount.
We are talking about T % in blood. Not personal experiences.
Every once and a while a non rugby player would think it was just an excuse to roll around with a hot chick, and they would get absolutely demolished. Just getting absolutely manhandled by a girl
I remember Serena Williams making a comment that the men can just hit harder and faster. So even a sport like tennis men just have an advantage.
Having watched some badass girls wrestle dudes and win it’s an up hill battle. Women are typically stronger then men at a young age like single digit age but one puberty hits it’s all off the table.
Now shooting(archery/firearms) I have seen girls out preform men and it’s a fair sport of accuracy. Also in motor sports women can be competitive there and also have an advantage of being smaller and lighter. Every 100 lbs is a 1/10th a second
I know this is just a joke, but I’ve recently become a project manager for the first time. I’m open to tips and suggestions.
I’ve really enjoyed it and have worked hard to give my developers everything they need as soon as possible. Otherwise I try to stay out of the way and do my best to shield them from the pressure that’s being applied on me to achieve deadlines.
I’d agree that anyone can ask for project updates, but I really do work hard to balance client demands with c-suite expectations and the realistic outcomes described by my developers.
You seem like a person who wants to try and do well and be a good manager. So be very careful of burnout, because the constant tension between doing what is right for your team and meeting upper-management expectations can drive you crazy. It did me anyway, which is why I don’t manage anymore.
Take regular vacations and actually disconnect from work when you do. Try to do the same for at least 1 or 2 weekends per month. Being organized is important and helps with the job and the burnout, but there’s a thin line between “keeping notes in Obsidian keeps me focused” and “my entire 2nd job is now maintaining Jira tickets.”
Organization is for you, keep it for you, and don’t let your organizing become a part of your “public api” or else it’ll become another avenue for status updates that you’re obliged to maintain. Turning your notes and private charts into data for upper management is why you compile special reports, just for them.
Really helpful. Yeah, it’s already invaded my vacations and time off, but I’m working to create better boundaries moving forward. The problem is that there’s literally no one else who can answer certain questions or resolve certain problems and everything will grind to a halt if I don’t deal with it in a timely manner.
I mean, if they want more coverage, they can hire more staff. At some point, just as you stand up for your reports, you have to be willing to say no when it comes to you.
Yeah man, that’s how it starts. You become the guy to answer question and before you know it you will be assigning tickets to yourself because nobody else can solve them.
Please be careful, I would not recommend that to anyone after living though it once.
This might sound twisted, but something that helped me take more time to myself was when a guy who was “the only one who could answer certain questions” with something like 30 years of experience in our field dropped dead of a heart attack at home. We figured out what we needed to figure out soon enough and his position wasn’t filled for a year because five or six of us took up the tasks he was in charge of… My point being, no one is irreplaceable. Disconnect when you’re not at work.
Do questions really need to be answered outside of work time? Are blockers identifiable in advance so a plan can be put in place. Not many things need to be done outside work hours and team members can cover vacation if something desperately needs to be done.
Yes and no? My team is scattered around the US, so if my east coasters hit a snag early, I genuinely don’t want them in a holding pattern until I get around to it. Same for my coworkers on the west coast.
Some of the intensity of it has been that I assumed control of a team that was already severely mismanaged and had missed it’s initial deadlines by a month.
Of course that manager got promoted to an area that better suited his skills and I was asked to step in and try to right the ship. Our final deadline is today and we only have minor and cosmetic bugs left (that we know of).
We have plenty of new features to add moving forward, but with the project back on track and the foundation established, I’ll be able to set better deadlines for everyone’s work life balance.
I will probably always have some temptation to pull long hours for my team scattered around the country, but it becomes much less urgent now that we’re past our insane crunch.
Maybe it’s hopelessly naive of me and the next deadline will also become a crunch, but I have some control over those future dates, so I hope it will be less of an issue.
Just being forced to talk about how it’s going and what’s blocking can be helpful, so I’m glad you’re questioning for to be more useful, not doing a little rubber-ducking isn’t all bad.
I always thought project managers were useless until I got a good one. Then I realized the issue was that most I’ve dealt with were as useful as this parrot
The key of a good PM is to know their job is to ensure you can do yours. My good PM had that internalized and his only goal was to remove obstacles for us… glorious times
So if I were to say, “I’m playing phone tag with the vendors liaison because all he does is poorly repeat what I ask to others inside the company”, my good PM would get on the phone with the vendor and get a list of contacts so I could skip the crappy middle man
Another time I said, the network folks don’t agree with the security folks on how to proceed. He would get everyone in the same room and get all ducks in a row, then let me know what the decision was.
If I said, I’m wasting half my day asking for availability to book meetings, he would ask who I needed to talk to and book everything himself
Do everything you can to help your software engineers (or whoever is doing the work) have as much focus time as they need. Buffer your meetings and questions to one chunk of time per day. Encourage them to block-out and protect their focus time. And encourage the team to keep office hours so they can still make themselves available to others, but in a controlled way.
Be transparent with the business’s goals and frustrations you are facing. There’s an attitude (often among inexperienced devs) that PMs are good for nothing; just an interface to the rest of the business, and a source of where tasks come from. And some certainly are that, but a good PM is worth their weight in gold.
Find a good mentor, and start thinking about your next career step now.
Was working on a team of 4 people, each with a different skillset (frontend, backend, design, CMS). The project manager basically just told us what we have to do in which order, without explicitly telling us who or how someone should do it, which i think everyone appreciated and worked really well for everyone.
In my last role there was no project management, and the Boss just assigned random tasks to anyone, regardless of his skillset. One week i had to work on jQuery UI from 10 years ago, next week on some exotic server language with barely any documentation, no examples and no stack overflow help. His philosopy was “fuck your skills and preferences, everyone has to know everything!”.
Before I quit there was some meeting how everyone must now learn video editing, because the product documentation (still with IE 6 screenshots) was not updated anymore but instead we would teach and explain the product in videos “because tiktok is very popular nowdays”.
As a Russian Jew who fled the Russia in the 1980s, my family moved for our safety and opportunity. Countries don’t deserve reverence just for being countries. We can be proud of our heritage without having to show allegiance to a nation state. Especially, when it is using our ethnicity/religion to brutally wipe out and massacre a civilian population.
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