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Cosmicomical , in What animal could you take in a fight?

I can definitely kill an hour

FatTony ,

Does an hour get prep time?

Risk ,

Then no.

Cosmicomical ,

Yes it does, but I still get an hour

Quetzalcutlass , (edited )

But time flies. Do you have a plan for that?

Kolanaki , in When a cave has better wifi than I do
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

Hell has the best wifi because it doesn’t give a fuck about FCC regulations.

Norgur ,
@Norgur@fedia.io avatar

Or Covid /s

Viking_Hippie , (edited )

Except that would mean awful wifi. FCC regulations stop ISPs from selling a worse product for more money to people with little to no choice in providers.

Fubarberry , in A good policy to have
@Fubarberry@sopuli.xyz avatar
gregorum ,

I was gonna say, I know an onion caption when I see one.

MargotRobbie , in Liking an OS isn't a personality trait ❌
@MargotRobbie@lemmy.world avatar

I will have you know my entire online persona on Lemmy is basically a 24/7 “Barbie” movie advertisement, thank you very much.

I use Arch BTW.

Splatterphace OP ,

I like McDonald’s too

tacosplease ,

You’re my favorite one on Lemmy. Never change.

CPMSP , in Snikt
samus12345 ,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar
PeriodicallyPedantic , in “Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.”

Simple solution, flip it upside down.


<span style="color:#323232;">  ___ 
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  |C|
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  |A|
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  |R|
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  |E|
</span><span style="color:#323232;">|JESUS|
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  |_|
</span>
LemmyKnowsBest ,
Frozzie ,
@Frozzie@lemmy.world avatar

I love how this isn’t fixing anything at all

LemmyKnowsBest ,

Right?? 🤣 I don’t own any editing software whatsoever so I did the best I could with what I had.

Frozzie ,
@Frozzie@lemmy.world avatar

No no. I mean by switching places it makes an upside down cross, thus being a symbol of the devil 🙃

Maalus ,

There is more cross under it, they just shopped the upper “arms” and left out the “trunk”.

captainlezbian ,

Fun fact: the inverted cross is actually a holy symbol in Catholicism. St. Peter was crucified upside down and so it’s his cross

over_clox , in Hunger

I could have gone my entire life without that thought ever crossing my mind, but here we are.

Duranie ,

Mom - “Stop playing your video game, it’s time for dinner.”

Son - “But I’m not hungry”

Mom - “Don’t tell me that, I can see your teeth are hard. Now go wash your hands.”

ickplant ,
@ickplant@lemmy.world avatar

I intensely dislike you right now.

Arcity ,
@Arcity@feddit.nl avatar

Arms are weak, teeth are hard… Mom’s spaghetti?

HexesofVexes , in Elon Tusk

“Because I was bought up to be a moral person who put the wellbeing of others before myself - why would I inflict a world that defines a person by their job on anyone?”

taiyang , in oc based on a true story

One of my old MMO friends came out as a MAGA after a year of raiding together. Tbh, it kind of didn’t matter since we were killing shit in a game and it just didn’t come up unless I was mentioning watching certain political satire shows. He wasn’t an outstanding guy, but I’ve played with much worse people and would still consider him a friend.

Don’t play with him anymore, but that was because of his other terrible life choices, going all in on playing League.

v4ld1z ,
@v4ld1z@lemmy.zip avatar

Playing League > MAGA. Not surprising

idunnololz ,
@idunnololz@lemmy.world avatar

Hey I’ve been playing since season 2 and… Anyways I’m not a Republican.

DragonTypeWyvern ,

Like, yes, people that run it down deserve the death penalty, but they also deserve a fair trial as free of prejudice as possible.

afraid_of_zombies ,

A guy at my D&D table went that way. Kinda glad the nights he doesn’t come tbh. Just feel dirty associating with someone like that outside of work.

Oh hi it’s you. My wife is an immigrant, my sister-in-law is trans, I’m an angry atheist and my life work is in the environmental sector. You hate my wife, my religion, my sister-in-law, and my career. Yet here I am spending time with you freely.

taiyang ,

It helps that in my case, the guy was mostly just enthralled in the cult of personality. Union guy, not religious, etc… If someone you know was part of a cult, you can either express concern and try and help, or leave them be. I ended up doing the latter, especially since back then maga was still a new term.

Splatterphace , in Locked in
Pyroglyph ,
@Pyroglyph@lemmy.world avatar

I’m a zoomer and I also have no fucking idea what this is

Retrograde ,
@Retrograde@lemmy.world avatar

Millennial checking in, I also have no idea wtf this means

The_Picard_Maneuver OP ,
@The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world avatar

I’m pretty sure they’re using “locked in” to mean “focused” or “in the zone”.

Splatterphace ,

frfr

femboy_bird ,

Ong

altima_neo ,
@altima_neo@lemmy.zip avatar

No cap

Vespair , in How many times will I tell you?

If you aren’t putting not just the seat but also the lid down, you’re just spraying your house with piss and shit particles.

Close the lid before flushing, you uncouth animals

PatFussy ,

And what if I want poop particles around my house huh? When was the last time you asked me

Vespair ,

Fair point. Hey !PatFussy, do you want disgusting shit particles flying all over your house?

PatFussy ,

I do thanks. I like to keep a nice gloss of poo coating every inch of my bathroom. Is this not normal?

Vespair ,

Normal is overrated

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

Can closing the lid prevent disgusting shit particles but allow the delicious shit particles?

Vespair ,

Hmm. Okay, for a one-time payment of $8,000.00 I’ll pop over and install our patented “Discerning Shitter Filter,” guarantee to let only the tastiest of all shit particles enter your atmosphere

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

civet bean coffee hear we come

nifty ,
@nifty@lemmy.world avatar

But wait tho, does that mean some people never flush while they’re on the toilet? Like they keep sitting there in the poo smell? Unless you’re passing deer pellets and their presence underneath doesn’t begin to haunt your soul, you need to flush while you’re sitting there and not quite done.

Vespair ,

Well yes but presumably your own ass is doing the job of blocking shit-spray in those scenarios

ArmoredThirteen ,

How much time are you spending on the toilet that it becomes a problem?

nifty ,
@nifty@lemmy.world avatar

My poos are quite epic

ArmoredThirteen ,

Fair enough lol

PatFussy ,

For you maybe

spez , in modern tech

Adrak means Ginger and ilaichi means cardamom.

The_wild_card ,

Fuck u spez

spez ,

When and where?

The_wild_card ,

No not in that sense

flambonkscious ,

Not much of a wild card, then, is it?

runjun , in Bad boys bad boys whatchu gonna do

‘Do you have any idea why I pulled you over today?’

‘Well, I might have an idea.’

Holzkohlen ,

unzips

Nudding , in Sad but true

We’re way past the point of no return if you factor in economics and societal pressure.

TankovayaDiviziya , in You can also take deductions for costs relating to criminal activity!

Europeans: You guys have to file your own taxes?

Treczoks ,

Yes, but it is different. I’m employed, so my employer pays taxes, social security, pension fund money, and health insurance into the proper channels, and I get an “after taxes” direct transfer (which is standard here for decades now).

The tax rates the employer pays are based on complicated tables which are calculated on average annual incomes and no deductions. So they are usually higher than they would be in reality.

At the beginning of the year, we get a paper from the employer stating how much taxes they have paid out of my pay over the year. Then we can take (you are not required to, but letting this slip would be stupid) tax forms and fill them out, or use a tax software (costs about €5 and contains all the legal tricks and up-to-date information). There you can claim all things that would reduce your tax load, e.g. Text benefits for education, for having a handicap, times on unemployment, change of pay rate, office supplies you need for business purposes, medical costs (which usually is not much, because we have working health insurance, but there are co-pays and things that are not covered, like something that is a big thing for us: a fixed rate per kilometer for trips to doctors and physiotherapeuts, which is a list of several pages and alone reduces our tax load by several hundred euro).

You submit this as a paper form, or, more modern, online. We usually hear back from the tax guys a few weeks later, asking for invoices and receipts, send them in, and again a few weeks later, we get money back. As we can claim a lot of stuff (my wife is handicapped), we usually get a few thousand euro back - which is a good incentive to file taxes! But even as a normal person, it pays, as there is a form “work-related costs” where people can claim money for commuting and similar things.

As a self-employed person, one has to submit taxes for the business, of course.

Donebrach ,
@Donebrach@lemmy.world avatar

What you’re describing is basically identical to what happens in the US, so not sure what is “different.”

captainlezbian ,

Nothing, because the first sentence made pretty clear they’re an American

brygphilomena ,

They specifically use the currency euro in their comment…

Donebrach ,
@Donebrach@lemmy.world avatar

Ah yes, Us Americans with our using Euros and Kilometers. You got me!

TheOakTree ,

I’d be quite happy if my dollars turned to euros and we started using the metric system…

jol ,

What do you mean? So do Europeans? In some countries you don’t have to if all your income is your salary and have no extra expenses.

Honytawk ,

In Belgium they also fill in the expenses automatically.

The only thing you need to do is check if anything is missing, and just not do anything if everything is correct. Which it usually is.

thecrotch ,

How do they know what your expenses are?

SkippingRelax ,

Not familiar with belgium but in Australia they don’t. It’s linked to your payroll so they know if you paid more or less that it was due, plus they have linked your bank accounts so they know if you had any interest to pay taxes on. Something similar for investments accounts too.

If you want to claim any deductions (ie. You work from home and have home office expenses) you punch them in yourself

jol ,

How can it fill expenses automatically? How can they know if something I buy is for work or leasure?

SkippingRelax ,

Check the tax office’s website of the country you live in, you might be up for an unpleasant surprise. Pretty normal to have to file a tax report if you are a grown up. There are exceptions in a few countries if all your income is from salaried work and you don’t have any deductions to claim but not the norm

Blackmist ,

From a UK point of view:

That absolutely is the norm. All handled through PAYE.

Any alterations are typically handled through next year’s tax code. Normal people don’t have to get involved in the process at all. You can prod them to get any refunds sooner (say you get a big bonus and the tax ends up going out of whack), but it works out over time to the point you don’t need to.

iegod ,

CRA (Canada) basically fills in your info for you, you just need to authorize your account in your tax software. Doable online too. If you run a business they obviously can’t do this but if you’re an employee they have all your info.

juliebean ,

in the us they have all your info, but your employer pays an estimated amount of taxes out of your paycheck all year, and you’ve still gotta fill out paperwork about it yourself as well.
if it turns out you overpaid, which you only know by doing the paperwork yourself, and you filed taxes, you get money back from the gov. if you overpaid and don’t file, the gov just keeps your money. if you underpaid and filed, you’ll have to send them more money, and if you underpaid and didn’t file, the IRS will be coming for you.

SkippingRelax ,

Sure they have all your info. I’m not familiar with Canada but in other countries where this happens happens, the site tells you that you need to check that everything is correct, and that YOU are responsible for the information submitted. When you confirm you have effectively submitted your tax return, albeit with the help of a number of automations.

I’m in Australia now, and that how it works here too. Yes it’s just a couple of clicks for most people, but you are indeed doing your tax return.

I haven’t don’t it in Europe in a while, but that was the case when I was there (albeit less automated) and I’m pretty sure that’s the case in most countries

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