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SeaJ , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

Won’t be long until Alabama considers miscarriage to be murder. Wait…that actually is already a thing:

www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-59214544

milicent_bystandr ,

When she arrived at hospital seeking treatment, Poolaw admitted to using illicit drugs while pregnant.

So the ‘crime’ is of causing the death of the foetus through illegal drug use.

SeaJ ,

It’s not conclusive that the cause was drug use. And that really should not matter anyway. It was a miscarriage.

HauntedCupcake ,

I’m surprised the Alabama legal system isn’t more comfortable with miscarriages. They seem to have had a lot recently

LemmyKnowsBest , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

Anybody else clicked on this because the thumbnail looked like a picture of a cheez-it and you were curious what cheez-its have to do with alabama & embryos?

PrawoJazdy ,

Triscuit to me.

duffman ,

Looked like raw hamburger meat to me.

Treczoks , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

If those embryos count as children, wouldn’t it be OK to ask for all kinds of legal benefits for them?

NotMyOldRedditName ,

Tax write offs for storage!

WaxedWookie ,

Using transit lanes!

Family tax benefits!

Ooh! Divorce and file for child support for dozens of kids!

NotMyOldRedditName ,

Adopt thousands of them and then every few days remove one from the freezer or fridge or whatnot and then demand bereavement leave.

SergeantScar ,

Carpool lane with 2 vials in the passenger seat?

intensely_human ,

It’s the most effective way to challenge the law. Just carry it through to its natural conclusion.

lagomorphlecture ,

“Wow I suddenly have 11 kids to care for. I can’t afford to live. Better apply for snap and tanf.”

CeruleanRuin ,
@CeruleanRuin@lemmy.world avatar

Lol, you think there are any social programs left after these chucklefucks are through.

dohpaz42 , (edited ) to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

By that logic, women are committing murder every time they menstruate.

Maybe I missed something because the article is behind a paywall.

Edit: ok, as pointed out, I don’t know how these things work. I apologize, and accept all the downvotes and jabs you can give.

wildbus8979 ,

By that logic, women are committing murder every time they menstruate.

Don’t give them ideas.

Anonymousclimber ,

Not sure you understand what an embryo is or how menstruation works.

dohpaz42 ,
@dohpaz42@lemmy.world avatar

Shit. Ok. I’m stupid. I’ll see myself out.

nokturne213 ,

At least you owned up to it.

pixeltree ,
@pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

No worries, now you know stuff you didn’t before

Ataraxia ,

Plenty of times a fertilized egg is expelled during menstruation for one reason or another though.

AnneBonny ,

By that logic, women are committing murder every time they menstruate.

An unfertilized egg is not the same thing as an embryo.

zqwzzle ,

Well… their religion has a virgin birth so maybe that’s where their confusion comes from.

jonne ,

They’d be happy to lock up all women in camps.

tsonfeir ,
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

Don’t forget about semen. Billions of babies… on the carpet.

lolcatnip ,

Remind me never to visit your home.

tsonfeir ,
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

I hate to tell you, but semen is on everything. Men jerk off literally everywhere.

DAMunzy ,

You ain’t wrong buddy. Your comment asked for it though with the way it was dressed ,in my defense.

tsonfeir ,
@tsonfeir@lemm.ee avatar

My birthday suit is very professional!!

lolcatnip ,

I don’t.

Raxiel ,

Take care not to trip in the cum keepers crypt

Thorny_Insight ,

Surely you can think of a better place to blow your load onto than on the carpet

Daft_ish ,

Fertilized eggs get flushed all the time when they fail to implant. One step closer to making sex illegal. Fucking idiots…

milicent_bystandr ,

ok, as pointed out, I don’t know how these things work.

He speaks on behalf of the whole Internet

I apologize

Oh, my bad.

fubarx , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

Tinder in certain states will put up an alert, warning you that if female, by proceeding with the date, you may be liable to carry a child to term, and if male, will need to pre-deposit child support in an escrow account.

Scubus ,

That’s why you don’t have sex until you can get a vasectomy

milicent_bystandr ,

Ooh I like the child support pre-deposit idea. Sounds ominously like taking responsibility for the child you might conceive from your pleasure.

IzzyScissor , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

If a couple who has a frozen embryo divorces, who pays child support and for how long?

Showroom7561 ,

What about visitation rights? Alabama has a lot of explaining to do. 🤗🤡

fidodo , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

If I were in Alabama I’d race to move out of Alabama

Everythingispenguins ,

I don’t live in Alabama and I am moving out of Alabama just in case

outer_spec , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children
@outer_spec@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

im going to eat one

stoly , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

This is an absolute tragedy but is also very much a leopards ate my face moment.

Do not feel sorry for these people, though. People who can afford these treatments are wealthy and they certainly voted for the sort of politicians that would create this state supreme court.

ExfilBravo ,

Yeah IVF isn’t cheap and it isn’t covered buy regular health insurance so its all out of pocket.

RagingRobot ,

My insurance covers it

Buffaloaf ,

That’s quite the stretch to assume all of these people are conservatives.

stoly ,

Of course not all are but it’s fucking Alabama, the right armpit of the gulf coast.

PerpetualPlayer2 , (edited )

Currently holding my newborn as I type this. Up until a few months ago, this little human being was a frozen embryo.

Both of my children were IVF babies, and I’m about as left leaning as they come.

Also, we’re not wealthy by any stretch. We ended up participating in a clinical trial that provided free IVF therapy (minus some misc costs).

I absolutely feel sorry for our fellow American citizens who are going through this horror, regardless of their political affiliation. Politicians are dealing in lives and livelihoods as if we average citizens mean nothing to them (spoiler alert, we don’t).

You should look into expanding your worldview.

stoly ,

I should? I’m complaining about how people in a state voted in people who would do something as horrid and cruel as this is and I should expand my worldview? Maybe, just maybe, it is possible to look at the accomplishments of a group and judge them based on that. All of this “you should feel sorry for people in Texas” nonsense falls into this same category. Yes, I can feel sorry for individuals who are victim of these sorts of atrocities while still believing that Texas is a shithole state that shouldn’t exist. Alabama is no different.

Further, you take exception with my comment on wealth while admitting that you didn’t pay for it yourself. Seems pretty disingenuous.

Psychodelic ,

You should also probably seek help from a licensed clinical professional counselor

BoringHusband , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

I guess soon, when you break-up with someone, the state might charge you with killing the idea of the children you might have had.

tryptaminev ,

10 more years and we are at “contraception is murder”

dzire187 ,

🎶 every sperm is sacred, every sperm is good 🎶

MagicPterodactyl ,

Can’t wait to tell Republicans how many millions of babies I’ve eaten

dustyData ,

You know how I can confidently say that anyone who is against the right to choose hates women?

Because doesn’t matter how much they claim to love children, and how many shenanigans they pull like this one, I know for a fact that not a single one of them would ever in their whole life even entertain the idea of charging a man who masturbated with mass murder.

Zink ,

Yeah but that man only releases HALF-babies by the millions. So that’s the loophole, right?

riskable ,
@riskable@programming.dev avatar

I hate to break this to you but for some men in these states those sperms will only count as 3/10ths of a baby.

For those that can’t do fractions: That’s 1/2 of 3/5ths.

bobzilla ,

So if I jerk off on the firehouse steps can I claim I’m just using the Safe Harbor law?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

10? Try 1 if Trump gets in.

cloud_punk ,

No, it’s probably sooner then you think.

npr.org/…/hobby-lobby-contraceptive-case-goes-bef…

billwashere ,

Or paying child support on every single embryo.

partial_accumen , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children
theherk ,

Dodson! We’ve got Dodson here.

billwashere ,

Nobody cares. Nice hat.

jaybone ,

Newman!

WindyRebel ,

Nuh uh uh you didn’t day the magic word!

Akasazh ,
@Akasazh@feddit.nl avatar

Dennis Nedry!

hardcoreufo ,

Thanks for a good laugh in these dark times.

njm1314 , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

Probably time to remind everybody the Judiciary branch can’t actually enforce its rulings. If they’re going to go full on religious crazy we can just start ignoring them.

Nomecks ,

Sure you can. It’s not like the DA’s office and police are in lock-step with them or anything right?

JoBo ,

Law gets enforced if power finds it useful to enforce. Ignoring it is not an option, for people actually in danger of having the law enforced against them.

Rinox ,

Yeah, but you go ahead and ignore first. I’ll see what happens

General_Effort ,

And that, kids, is why Andrew Jackson is on the 20 dollar bill.

fastandcurious , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children
@fastandcurious@lemmy.world avatar

Dafuq going on ova der?

VintageTech , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

But wait… that means they can claim them as dependents right?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

One would think.

unreasonabro ,

Oh man, get the state to pay for the storage costs for your embryos. That’ll put and end to this silly shit STAT.

gedaliyah ,
@gedaliyah@lemmy.world avatar

“Yes, I see on your tax forms that you have claimed 1034 dependents, which means that the state actually owes YOU. Here is your big bag of money sir.”

chiliedogg ,

Well considering most people who have them are wealthy, it would fit right in with Republicans wanting to give tax breaks to the rich.

The real question is child support.

FunkPhenomenon , to news in Couples race to move frozen embryos out of Alabama after court defines them as children

wouldnt that be cross border smuggling/human trafficking?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Hooray! You can’t win! The Republicans’ favorite kind of game!

scoobford ,

I haven’t read Alabama’s ruling, but if those embryos are legally children, then yes. Fortunately the destination state and the federal government do not agree, so you won’t have to worry about it unless you live in Alabama.

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