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assassinatedbyCIA , in I asked Microsoft's image creator to create "Godzilla in a 512k Mac game" and while this is not what I asked for, I can't help but be impressed.

Godzilla with the taco bell power-up

AllonzeeLV , in You must eat them

Meanwhile in Africa:

“Eat your vegetables! You know those fat, disgusting Americans just throw them away and eat pie! Do you want diabetes?”

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

the real “meanwhile in africa” is that they actually cook veggies and fruit in a way that’s appealing, they don’t just fucking steam some broccoli and expect kids to enjoy it.

MarmaladeMermaid ,

Well steaming is certainly a step up from boiling it for a full hour like their parents did, for “safety.”

BastingChemina ,

Boiled in unsalted water, because it’s “healthier”

Cappurnikus ,

Do I only like raw broccoli or have I never had properly prepared broccoli?

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

i wouldn’t know, i find broccoli in general to be firmly “meh”, it’s just one of the more common examples of a vegetable that people serve in the worst way imaginable and expect their kids to eat anyways.

ma11en ,

I roast it with onions and red peppers seasoned with fajita mix.

LemmysMum ,

Or char it in a pan and mix with soy sauce, garlic, ginger and chili flakes.

pirat , (edited )

Or place the separated buds in an ovenproof dish and bake it with olive oil, grated hard cheese, breadcrumbs and spices on the top.

AllonzeeLV , (edited )

A big part is that the processed foods of America make us have drug like cravings for things we consume too much of, salt, fat, sugar, etc. Get em hooked, it’s good for profit.

And we’re dependant on them much of the time because of our subsist to work lifestyle.

It’s expensive for it to be easy to eat well in America. While the owners order postmate’s cobb salads, have household staff, and eat out with abandon, in addition to being on their own time, eating healthy while poor involves dodging endless temptation to eat fastcrap instead while prepping and cooking and cleaning meal kits before and/or after work, lengthening the time off work devoted to work. Many tonedeaf say “it’s important so do it or you’re just irresponsible,” but when time is a commodity of survival for the poor, taking care of your health is often the first priority to be sold off.

And let’s be honest, with that highly prevalent, encouraged lifestyle in America, how hard are you going to want to maximize your longevity to keep doing it? We’re livestock for wealthy sociopaths and our reward for the daily profit maze is ubiquitous delicious poison. What a great fucking place.

XEAL ,

I either need to eat my veggies pan-fried with bacon or ham, or in a puree with seasoning and olive oil.

Almost no plain steamed or boiled food is tasty…

spacesweedkid27 ,

Damn steamed veggies and especially broccoli is soooo tasty

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

to me it’s just raw veggies but without the satisfying textures, and a tendency to smell like farts if it’s in the brassica family. Exceptions being potato and any type of bean/pea.

Now if you steam/boil veggies and then fry them, that’s almost always a huge improvement over raw. I’m a slut for the maillard reaction.

spacesweedkid27 ,

I’m a slut for the maillard reaction

This is definitely something I will quote in my day-to-day life from now on.

I kinda don’t think that brassica veggies boiled smell like farts, but I think that vegetal does have a tendency for that if the quality just sucks.

Late2TheParty , in Share with those less fortunate
@Late2TheParty@lemmy.world avatar

The cajones on that dude! Love it! 🤣

catsup ,

I think you meant “cojones”. “cajones” means drawers lol

Late2TheParty ,
@Late2TheParty@lemmy.world avatar

Hell yeah! That’s a new brain wrinkle for me! Thanks, homie.

Todesschnitzel , in Sometimes I question my sanity

Unpopular Oponion: None of us has a soul Ergo: Porn is indeed free.

Well maybe you pay with your personal data and dignity though.

general_kitten ,

you pay by having all ads you will ever see be for desperate milfs in your area

Shadywack ,
@Shadywack@lemmy.world avatar

So long as that one dumbass pays for the desperate milfs so the rest of us can enjoy our porn…

dylanTheDeveloper ,
@dylanTheDeveloper@lemmy.world avatar

The worst ones are naked grandma’s

Caketaco ,
@Caketaco@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Marge absolutely going ham on Homer in the banner ad while I’m trying to zerk it to family-friendly incest porn :/

Emerald ,

uBlock Origin. I use lemmy btw.

DoubleVV ,

You pay with more and more time spent watching porn, digging into an addictive cycle that, by definition, repeat itself. Porn is free indeed, but is pretty bad for you.

Cryophilia ,

You sound like those anti-gay preachers who are always telling us to reject temptation

Says more about you than people in general

DoubleVV ,

True I had problems with. But I’m not preaching, you do what you want.

surewhynotlem ,

It sounds like you’re just doing it wrong. I just crank it a few times a week for ten minutes.

DoubleVV ,

I mean a do too, but try to not wank for at least a month, you’ll find it hard to do. At least for me that’s the case. And I do work, I do socialize at least twice a week.

InternetTubes ,

It’s almost as if people had a biological drive to it that only tends to balance out when they find a mate to share it with.

DoubleVV ,

Yeah who knew

Fisch ,
@Fisch@lemmy.ml avatar

I don’t think that’s true for the majority of people tho. I personally don’t have that issue at all, I actually watch less porn now than I used to (Was once a day at some point, now it’s once every few days) and it’s not like I’m getting old or anything, I’m still a teenager. And I have one friend who does it multiple times a day, cause he’s bored but everyone else I know doesn’t.

DoubleVV ,

Thing is it saturate neuro-receptors and like drugs it becomes an addiction. I’m not preaching tho, you do what you at the end of the day.

lud ,

Everything can do that though.

uphillbothways , in Knowledge is... power?
@uphillbothways@kbin.social avatar

When I was a teenager, an older friend told me how he learned in college history how the first Emperor of China wrote the language, made all these scientific discoveries, etc, etc. And I, knowing fuck all about Chinese history, was like 'you mean he killed all the historians and advisors, then burned all the libraries, so he could take credit, right?' My friend is like 'uhhh.....'

Yeah, so turns out that's pretty much how more recent readings of it say it went down.

DragonTypeWyvern ,

If by that you mean “He was about as real as King Arthur,” sure.

HawlSera ,

Wasn’t he based on some truth or something?

DragonTypeWyvern ,

They’re both cultural stories that were probably based on several actual historical figures at some point that were combined and mythologized over centuries.

Take Arthur. You could maybe find the origin of the character in some Celtic leader fighting the Romans, then as people retell stories he gets merged with a different guy, and then when the Anglo-Saxons invade new stories get added and repurposed etc etc and now the French hear about it and decide it needs a love triangle where the English king gets cucked by a French Chad Knight, boom, now you’ve got a medieval courtly love story from someone once talking about the time Athor’lescs’op once stole some Roman sheep.

The Yellow Emperor is the same thing. There probably was a Chinese warlord who paid for some irrigation ditches and wasn’t too big of an asshole to the peasants, and another one later who built some libraries, so they’re “based on a historical figure” but mostly the stories are just cultural myths that make good entertainment and maybe work as a morality play.

Chickenstalker ,

Qin Shi Huang was as real as Julius Caesar.

DragonTypeWyvern , (edited )

He’s also not the person OP referenced.

The actual “first emperor of a unified China” being a different person than the mythological “First Emperor, tamer of rivers, maker of paper, big brained inventor of everything.”

thorbot , in They were lucky Aladdin was such a cool dude

First wish: all humans turn blue for 24 hours after masturbating

Second wish: reverse all human digestive tracts so food goes into anus and excretion comes out of mouth, trump style

Third wish: reproductive organs are all non functional for reproduction specifically and humans mate by doing The Polka for 6 consecutive hours.

Love, Satan

w00tabaga ,

Third kind of makes the first one pointless. Unless that is, you consider doing the Polka by yourself masturbation.

djsoren19 ,

You still feel horny urges, but baby can only be created via intense accordion action. It’d be a real blessing, the most effective form of contraceptive available.

Aqarius ,

“Blessing”. Weird Al would have his hands full pretty quickly.

thorbot ,

Notice how I said reproduction specifically. You could still pleasure yourself. and yes solo polka would also count as masturbation

oolio ,

Do you masturbate to reproduce?

Seventhlevin ,

Shit damn. I can’t masturbate OR polka without turning blue? That really is diabolical.

Shush ,

Funnily enough, the third wish is actually one of the most positive things that can happen here.

Now people will fuck each other all day without having to worry about getting pregnant. No pills, no implants, no hormone. It’s just good ol’ pleasure now.

azvasKvklenko ,

I’m blue, da ba dee da ba di

Delphia , in Lemmy feels so much more welcoming than R*ddit... And it's weird

Go onto Lemmygrad and try talking about your investment property.

ATQ ,

OP on the first of the month: Good morning, renters!

ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling ,
@ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Have fun getting to Lemmygrad. Your instance is one of the only ones that still federate with it

TonyTonyChopper ,
@TonyTonyChopper@mander.xyz avatar

mine does too

Ubermeisters ,

Go on hexbear and literally say anything at all

s_s ,

literally

Only worthless capitalists read!

Ubermeisters ,

Lmao thanks. You get it

Cabrio ,

Unironically true looking at literacy rates in poor under supported communities.

outer_spec , in nobody knows how it feels
@outer_spec@lemmy.studio avatar

Can’t believe that people are spreading the left-handed agenda on this apolitical shitposting sub. A hundred years ago, everyone was right-handed. But these days, the sinister left-handeds are forcing their unnatural left-handed ideology onto our children! Disgusting!

sent from my samsung smart fridge

thanks_shakey_snake ,

sinister left-handeds

I see what you did there

Nerorero , in nobody knows how it feels
@Nerorero@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Opressiin is not a competition

humanlyhuman429 ,

I think you forgot this is shitposting

julianh ,

Me when I post blatant racism and insult women (it’s fine I’m just shitposting)

Repossess6855 ,

Chill its just a meme it is not a serious take on either topic

SkyeStarfall ,

Ideas very much are disseminated through memes and jokes. That’s one of the main social purposes.of comedy.

Why is including feminists funny to people in a meme? What is the implication?

neutralbipolar2 OP ,
@neutralbipolar2@lemmy.world avatar

deleted_by_author

  • Loading...
  • SkyeStarfall , (edited )

    They have an implication whether it is intended or not.

    Clent ,

    Being left handed is racist?

    humanlyhuman429 ,

    how is this racist and how does this insult women?

    moosetwin ,
    @moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

    nothing exists in a vacuum :(

    Spaghetti_Hitchens ,

    Neutrinos do. They exist everywhere

    julianh ,

    Not a true vacuum if there are neutrinos in it.

    Napain ,

    no one ever normalized serious hate politics through shitposting, right???

    humanlyhuman429 ,

    this is not meant to be serious shitposts aren’t serious like i have to point that out

    irmoz ,

    Their point stands, though

    Hazdaz ,

    It is these days.

    peetabix , in My favourite piece of Internet history
    @peetabix@lemmy.world avatar

    I think Bobson Dugnutt is my favourite.

    ArrrborDAY ,

    It is an awesome name

    dbx12 , in gender selection

    I’m going to hell for laughing at the bad circumcision option

    halvar ,

    Shouldn’t because it happened in real life. Look up David Reimer.

    Kotsi3P0 ,

    I looked it up, his life story is terrible but informative and hopefully discouraging many people doing the same to their children/patients.

    AnActualFossil ,
    @AnActualFossil@kbin.social avatar

    I read that as "children / parents" and was about to search for this amazing revenge story, but then I read the post again and now I'm disappointed.

    Hogger85b ,

    Happened (not quite to that extent) but to a friend of mine. He is still male with penis, but erections cause him discomfort to pain and he is unable use his penis for sex. Deeply affected his psyche and relationships.

    Kayel ,

    Its more common than people think

    www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3253617/

    WtfEvenIsExistence , in It’s going good so far 🤞🤞

    Congratulations, you’ve been defederated. Please do not resist.

    TheGoldenGod OP ,
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    I really hope it works out as smoothly as this, it feels like advertising sneaks it’s way in somehow though. 😣

    Cruxifux ,

    I haven’t seen any ads thus far on lemmy and it’s pretty great.

    TheGoldenGod OP , (edited )
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    I’m more worried about the advertisers sneaking in through “bragging” about products, like Reddit saw. 😣

    Cruxifux ,

    Bragging? I’m not familiar with this. What does that mean in terms of advertising?

    Kolanaki ,
    @Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

    It’s a form of guerrilla advertising where they play on FOMO and try to make people jealous of someone who is “loving” the product. It’s one of the harder forms of shilling to detect because it can sound just like a regular person who actually does enjoy a specific product.

    TheGoldenGod OP ,
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    Exactly this. It’s made me a pessimist online, and offline.

    TheGoldenGod OP ,
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    I’ll admiit, bragging wasn’t the right word, but I meant all the PR teams the enshittify social media like fleas, by pretending to be a run of the mill user, attempting to build hype.

    Cruxifux ,

    Oh I get what you mean.

    Yeah I tried to google what a good free VPN was and all the Reddit posts were OBVIOUS plants by VPNs that wanted you to pay for them.

    I found a free one eventually but Reddit was no help.

    TheGoldenGod OP ,
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    Exactly, with SEO it’s like wading through a septic tank these days.

    Cruxifux ,

    Not to sound like an idiot but I don’t know what SEO is either.

    TheGoldenGod OP ,
    @TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world avatar

    Sorry, Search Engine Optimization. en.m.wikipedia.org/…/Search_engine_optimization

    Ruined Google search results, now it’s mostly spam.

    Cruxifux ,

    Oh yeah. It’s annoying as fuck. Every service we used to take for granted is just becoming a big add.

    LouNeko ,

    So all the Sync posts aren’t ads in disguise?

    Kolanaki ,
    @Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

    Yeah that’s what I was thinking. I haven’t seen a pop up or a banner ad; but I’ve seen plenty of ads in the form of a creator trying to sell their creation and other shill stuff. Not nearly as often as on Reddit, but it’s not something you can escape from on social media.

    Cruxifux ,

    I’m fine with that. I just don’t want to be reminded that hellofresh exists every five minutes.

    Cruxifux ,

    I don’t know what a sync post is either man haha

    towerful ,

    My man, have you met our lord and saviour hypnotoad?

    0nXYZ ,

    ⚡️😵‍💫⚡️

    callyral ,
    @callyral@kbin.social avatar

    It's not and I'm Lovin' It. The Fediverse I mean. Want to defederate from corporate ads? Just Do It. Have It Your Way and Make Every Second Count.

    Really, you just need to Think Different.

    Strayce ,

    Where is c/angryupvote

    LetKCater2U ,

    This is the most beautifully crafted comment I’ve read all day. Bravo!

    NewWorldOverHere , in funny because true

    I’m the same way with my mail.

    I’m a millennial - I don’t check my mailbox for 6+ weeks at a time.

    If I order something, then I know about it and expect it at my door (because it’s fedex, amazon, or ups).

    Otherwise, it will have to wait until I happen to remember I have a mailbox.

    For example, with bills - I expect you to have my email address and use it, because I supplied it whenever I established xyz account.

    Exceptions:

    1. Around the holidays when people send out holiday cards!
    2. For a local property tax exemption, my county refuses to email it. Their requirement for receiving the exemption is that you live here locally, and part of their way for verifying that, is by sending the request form to your local physical address.
    GCostanzaStepOnMe ,

    I don’t check my mailbox for 6+ weeks at a time.

    That seems dangerously negligent.

    Fuck_u_spez_ ,

    Welfare checks have been conducted over less.

    Nepenthe ,
    @Nepenthe@kbin.social avatar

    When it's too cold out to wanna walk all the way up there, I've gone for 3-4 months at a stretch. All I ever get is garbage anyway, so it's only ever mattered twice, and one of those was an expected package.

    No one's ever called me a welfare check :(

    NewWorldOverHere ,

    I’m in the military lol. The government definitely knows I’m alive by 0600 sharp every morning.

    grue ,

    I’ve had a P.O. box for years because I don’t want to disclose my home address when I register domains. Maybe I should check it one of these days…

    almar_quigley ,

    Ok boomer

    Djeikup ,

    Arthur Dent kinda stuff is going to happen to him. Yellow…

    Veraxus ,
    @Veraxus@kbin.social avatar

    I'm like this with email. I do a quick visual scan about once per week... or fortnight... because it's almost all SPAM, and no matter how many blocks and filters I create, it does little to hold back the tide of trash.

    Everyone who matters knows the only way to reach me reliably is via text message.

    frustratedphagocytosis ,
    @frustratedphagocytosis@kbin.social avatar

    I nearly missed a jury duty notice because of this habit. I only check if I know money or a specific bill is coming.

    bob_wiley ,
    @bob_wiley@lemmy.world avatar

    I get it, I check mine maybe once a week, but if I go longer than that it’s completely stuffed full. At some point it’s just not nice to the mail carrier that has to try and jam shit in there.

    If junk mail didn’t exist wouldn’t be an issue, but there is a lot of verbose junk sent in the mail.

    NewWorldOverHere ,

    I am almost to the point where I don’t mind normal junk mail. That’s easy to quickly scan, identify as junk, and toss.

    What really grinds my gears are when my companies contact me and write something like “Important” on it. This happened recently with my credit card company. I thought maybe I had gone overdue, or had overpaid and this was letting me know my bill the following month would be less (it has happened before).

    No - it was letting me know I had good credit and could get a good % on a loan through them if I wanted. Now, that made me mad. Junk mail, from my very own credit card company. B.S.

    bob_wiley ,
    @bob_wiley@lemmy.world avatar

    My bank called me and told me I needed to come it due to something with my account. I asked what it was and they weren’t clear. I asked if they were just going to try and sell me a credit card and they said no. During the week I work banking hours, so they agreed to have me come in on Saturday. So on Saturday, instead of doing what I want, I get dressed and go to the bank. They tried to sell me a credit card and a savings account. Since that happened I found a new bank and have been migrating over. I plan to close the account completely in the coming months. I was a customer for 22 years without any issues, but fuck them for lying to me and disrupting my weekend for a sales pitch.

    Gork ,

    In the stamp postmark area, if you see “Prepaid Sorted Standard”, most of the time it’s junk mail like what you describe. Regardless of how “important” it says it is.

    NewWorldOverHere ,

    That’s a good tip, thank you!

    Awe ,
    @Awe@lemmy.ml avatar

    If you live in the US, you can get your mail sent to your email inbox every day you are getting something that is directly addressed to you (i.e., not spam). It’s called USPS Informed Delivery.

    It doesn’t always work if they get your address slightly off (say they put STE instead of APT), but it’s a lot better than nothing.

    NewWorldOverHere ,

    Just signed up for this, thank you. It’s fantastic!

    Now I can check my mail from the comfort of my bed. USPS email comes daily at 0400.

    AccurstDemon , in PLEAAASSEE PLEASE COME BACK TO THE OFFICE PLS
    @AccurstDemon@sopuli.xyz avatar

    It’s both decreasing productivity AND saving the economy!!!

    fortune.com/…/remote-work-preventing-economy-from…

    Such an incredible paradox 🤯

    GladiusB ,
    @GladiusB@lemmy.world avatar

    That’s a pay site

    DreamySweet ,
    @DreamySweet@lemmy.sdf.org avatar
    misterundercoat ,

    Reminds me of the headlines trend a few years ago when Millenials were killing everything.

    betheydocrime , (edited ) in looking forward to the comments

    Hard G and soft G are both acceptable pronunciations, the only way to be wrong in the situation is to insist that your preferred way to pronounce it is the only correct way to pronounce it

    Oh, except silent G. Silent G is wrong.

    cinnamorollyy ,
    @cinnamorollyy@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

    deleted_by_author

  • Loading...
  • betheydocrime ,

    How do I delete someone else’s comment

    FlickeringScreens ,
    Eccitaze ,
    @Eccitaze@yiffit.net avatar

    nah fuck that i’mma be unapologetically weird and scruffy

    life’s too short to give a fuck

    flickertail OP ,
    @flickertail@lemmy.world avatar

    In that case, yodspeed my dude

    TeoTwawki ,
    @TeoTwawki@lemmy.world avatar

    Gif you say so

    Iapar ,

    Hard R would also be wrong.

    evatronic ,

    I will never not smile when this comes up. Not because of the word, but because of Linus.

    youtu.be/MFDiuBomSuY

    Iapar ,

    The innocent “what?! No!” :D

    Jtn670 ,

    No Gifs or Gbuts

    damnson ,

    Based and true

    LillyPip ,

    Gigh, as the Scots pronounce it. That’s the only way.

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