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kbin.life

totallynotarobot , to maliciouscompliance in [REPOST] A Manager Has To Dismiss Me? OK, I'll Just Get Overtime For Doing Nothing Then

2 hours of overtime is $30? OP needs a union.

BearJCC ,

Thats $8/hr even. Pretty standard for retail jobs where I live.

totallynotarobot ,

Cost of living where I am is around $38-40 so I’m all out of whack with this, sorry. But on most contracts our first 2hrs of OT would be 1.5x, whereas you’re somehwere around 1.85x? So that’s neat.

Blamemeta ,

Most places don’t have skyhigh col.

totallynotarobot ,

My midlife crisis just got a little worse.

There are places where it would literally cost me 80% less to live. I’m stuck for work reasons but damn.

SpacetimeMachine ,

But most people don’t live in most places.

Blamemeta ,

Then thats self inflicted.

magnusrufus ,

How do you figure?

Blamemeta ,

You choose to live in high col places, expecting to live cheaply.

magnusrufus ,

And what about the people who don’t chose that but still end up living there?

BearJCC ,

The city where I live has a higher col then the surrounding rural areas. Our living wage is $15.34 and poverty wage is $6.35 I don’t have a report for the surrounding areas but my gut says somewhere around $10/$5.

In the US you have to get paid 1.5x for hours over 40. $30/2.5/1.5 = $8. And thats assuming no paycheck deductions such as tax, healthcare, alimony, etc

Gingernate ,

Op worked 2.5 extra hours. That’s $8/hr * 1.5 overtime * 2.5 extra hours.

applejacks ,
@applejacks@lemmy.world avatar

where in the hell is that?

Even mcdonald’s working are getting ~$14/hr

pfannkuchen_gesicht , to nostupidquestions in [Answered] Why is the consumption of Meat considered bad

Because you need considerably more resources to grow meat than you need to to grow a nutritionally equivalent amount of vegetables.

TwoFace211 ,

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  • Wilzax ,

    That field could be used to grow a different crop than grass, which would use less water per calorie of human food produced

    ValiantDust ,

    Also, hardly any cows just eat grass these days. That’s not how you get a lot of meat as fast and as cheap as possible. Also, since cows need a lot of grass, I a lot less area would remain for other crops even if they did (since grass needs way more area for the same amount of calories than stuff like soybeans). So it’s actually a good thing, they aren’t just eating grass.

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • ValiantDust ,

    If that is the case, then they are more the exception than the rule. (Do you by chance have any source on that? Because I’m pretty sure here in Germany that’s not the case) Also, at least Switzerland produces less beef than it consumes, so that’s not exactly sustainable. I don’t know about the other two.

    rog ,

    Funnily enough, having cattle on that land only further fucks it up by causing erosion that can take decades to resopve even after the cattle is removed.

    roastpotatothief ,

    what kind of erosion?

    are you thinking of “overgrazing”?

    dQw4w9WgXcQ ,

    There are of couse exceptions and areas where cattle can graze all year, and the need to deforest areas isn’t as large as other places. However, for the majority of beef production, there are less enviornmentally friendly cattle food implemented. So maybe the solution should be that only the areas that can produce beef sustainably should be allowed to consume it? I would assume that that would be an unpopular policy, so I find it to be a much better solution to reduce the beef consumption even in the areas with sustainable producion and rather let those areas export the excess production.

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • thethirdobject ,

    as a Swiss, it is an issue. our glaciers are metling more and more every year and we rely on hydropower a lot, we need all the rain and water we can get, even if it seems like there is a lot.

    commie ,

    cows east grass and a great deal of the water they consume is in grass.

    Wooki ,

    Jesus your downvotes. Seems facts hurt some real delicate flowers…

    tetraodon ,

    It’s a false choice. Land not used for grazing could be rewilded, which provides benefits in both biodiversity and carbon fixing.

    roastpotatothief ,

    depends on the land. normally livestock are put on land which won’t grow anything else.

    hobs ,

    They actually graze in national forest land in the US. I spent a lot of time tracking wolves to prevent the ranchers and the forest service from shooting wolves so they could safely graze deep into national forest land, destroying the local ecosystem, just as the rivers and bears and caribou started to recover after the reintriduction of wolves.

    buzziebee ,

    I think extrapolating from poor US environmental regulations to say that no where in the world is it sensible to produce dairy or beef is a bit of a false equivalence. We also don’t have lead pollution in our water, but saying no one should drink tap water because it has lead in it in a certain part of the US is also silly.

    I’m all for alternative protein sources and sustainable agriculture, but eliminating meat consumption likely isn’t the best approach. The US, Brazil, and a bunch of other countries using stupid practices like slash and burn agriculture really need to develop and enforce more sustainable practices via regulations and enforcement.

    Wooki ,

    Who waters the grass to feed cows? You farm them in a suitable region!

    jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    Most deforestation today is to grow animal feed.

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    Just globally. Not sure about specific countries. Virtually all of the Amazon deforestation, for example

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    We can’t have more cows if they don’t have food. We need to cut down trees to grow other stuff to feed the cattle. Global demand for beef is rising, mainly due to increases of standards of living in Asia.

    So how do we raise more cattle without more farmland to grow food for them?

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    The cows are the issue though. If people buy beef, it doesn’t come out of the sky. How do you raise an animal without feeding it?

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw , (edited )
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    Ah yes, let’s stop illegal rainforest destruction by banning it. Nobody ever tried that l! /s

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    Wow, again, I don’t think anyone has ever tried that

    TwoFace211 ,

    deleted_by_author

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  • jeffw ,
    @jeffw@lemmy.world avatar

    I can’t tell at this point if you just don’t understand causality, you’re fishing for downvotes (is that a thing on Lemmy now?), or you’re a meat industry shill

    anaximander ,

    Continuing to support demand for beef at current rates as the population grows means that beef production must increase. That means we need more cows. Where do you propose we put all those cows? The current solution has been to cut down trees to create usable land. What’s your alternative?

    roastpotatothief ,

    or at a stretch or could be an argument against beef. but the question was about meat generally.

    Gebruikersnaam ,
    @Gebruikersnaam@lemmy.ml avatar

    If it is anything like here they supplement the feed with a ton of soy beans, which is causing huge problems in Brazil. iirc 87% of soy is used for cattle.

    usernamesAreTricky ,

    livestock production in the UK and Ireland is still linked to rainforests abroad since chickens, pigs and cows are often fed imported soybeans. Brazil is the world’s largest soybean exporter, and much of its crop is grown on deforested land.

    Many people might also be surprised to learn that Ireland and western regions of Great Britain are home to rainforests: temperate forests sometimes called Celtic or Atlantic rainforests. And, like their tropical counterparts, UK and Irish rainforests are threatened by grazing livestock, particularly deer and sheep.

    theconversation.com/livestock-grazing-is-preventi…

    Cynicivity ,

    Unless you are a small hobby farm, you’re not putting your cows out on pasture alone to raise them for meat. Most grasses are deficient in one or more vital nutrients that the cows need to grow. Most cows today are fed TMR (Total Mixed Rations). These are diets carefully mixed with different grasses, grains, hays, and mineral supplements. There are different metabolic diseases that cows can get when eating diets deficient in different nutrients. Cows that are sick don’t want to eat, and cows that don’t eat don’t grow. To a farmer, that’s like burning money.

    roastpotatothief ,

    that’s true in a few parts of the world. it may not be valid at all, depending where op is from. in general livestock is the most sustainable land use food.

    EhList ,
    @EhList@lemmy.world avatar

    Can I have a source for this claim?

    AA5B ,

    I’d also like to know, but I imagine that at a small enough scale, it’s mostly letting a few animals live on otherwise unused land, and mostly just protect them. This imagined ideal would disappear extremely quickly, scaling even to village level, and not relevant to modern farming

    roastpotatothief ,

    This is exactly what happens. The highest quality land in a country is used for tillage. The less productive parts are used for grazing. This is how farmers make the most money. They’d be fools to use productive land for grazing and grow crops on poor land.

    KitsuneHaiku ,

    This is so wrong. I don’t even know where to begin. We grow so much alfalfa (huge waste of water) and soybeans in the US to support our own and other countries’ meat farming, then we ship it across the world. You could find this out with a simple Google search. This is willful ignorance.

    Greenhouse gas emissions - Meat accounts for nearly 60% of all greenhouse gases from food production

    Water usage - it takes over 1800 gallons of water to produce e just one pound of beef.

    In order to help, you don’t even have to go vegan. Reducing meat consumption is helpful too with something like “meatless Monday”

    commie ,

    85% of soybeans are pressed for oil for human use.

    and those water use stats include things like the water it takes to raise feed crops. it would make sense, except that we mostly feed livestock plants or parts of plants that people won’t eat. for example, we raise cotton for textiles, and the seed would be industrial waste if we didn’t feed it to cattle. why do we count the water used to make jeans in the water used to make beef? it’s just dishonest.

    tetraodon ,

    Woah dude, prime bullshit here.

    ourworldindata.org/…/Global-soy-production-to-end…

    76% of soy production worldwide goes into animal feed.

    commie ,

    I’m so glad you used the outworldindata link.

    do you see how most of what is fed to animals is soy meal? that is the industrial waste from pressing soybeans for oil.

    a soybean is only about 20% oil. if 17% of all the end uses of soybeans is oil, then about 85% of all soybeans are pressed for oil.

    tetraodon ,

    But animal feed also contains soy oil, so even allowing for part of soybean production being used for human consumption, there remains a significant part of soy effectively produced for the benefit of livestock. Furthermore, animal feed production incentivizes the cultivation of soy. If there was no animal feed incentive, there would not be a need to expand soy cultivation into virgin land.

    Which bring us to animal feed causing increased land usage (which could be reforested if nothing else), methane emissions, and waste production connected with raising livestock.

    commie ,

    there is no reason to think that the land would be deforested, nor even that it would not have been deforested for some other reason, if everyone were vegan.

    tetraodon ,
    commie ,

    what would change if everyone were vegan? what would change to MAKE everyone vegan? you can’t actually know what that world would be like. you’re guessing.

    tetraodon ,

    Sorry but what an idiotic take.

    It has been proven over and over again that diets including fewer animal products are lighter on the environment (e.g. www.nature.com/articles/s43016-023-00795-w).

    I’m not claiming everyone should go vegan, but if everyone ate less meat, it would give us more time against climate change.

    commie ,

    the nature article only talks about the impacts of producing the various foods in the current circumstance. if people shifted to eating less meat, then circumstances would be different, but it’s not clear that the environment would actually benefit at all.

    commie ,

    calling my take idiotic doesn’t rebutt it. it’s pure rhetoric.

    roastpotatothief ,

    greenhouse gases and water usage are different issues i didn’t address here.

    the usa is one of the “few parts of the world” i was talking about, that it is a bad example of sustainable farming.

    commie ,

    animals are fed parts of plants that people can’t or won’t eat. all of the studies about the ecological impacts ignore this fact and then attribute the water used to produce, say, cotton to beef.

    Misconduct ,

    I live in AZ. You know the desert state? The state that catches on fire a lot? Yeah. We’ve had Saudis taking our water, for FREE, to grow food for their cattle back home for YEARS. It’s SO infuriating to see them asking us to conserve water and then looking the other way as we get drained for nothing.

    They’re not even the only ones dipping into our water either. It’s ridiculous.

    tetraodon ,

    You forget that most land was forested (even in Europe) before humans decided that grass was more useful than trees.

    eugenia , to nostupidquestions in I'm aware of kbin, mastodon, and lemmy. Are there any other federated applications out there?
    @eugenia@lemmy.world avatar

    My favorite is PixelFed. I’m an artist, so Instagram was important for me, but for a few years now it’s absolutely terrible (no reach at all with their special algorithms). PixelFed fixes all that, it replicates the feeling of IG as it was 8-10 years ago: chronological feed, tag-based, no extraneous features. I’m really enjoying it, as I can finally grow again my followship as an artist: pixelfed.org

    sounddrill ,

    Bonus points for lack of normies posting crappy reels

    Mr_nutter_butter ,
    @Mr_nutter_butter@lemmy.world avatar

    So much good photos on there no generic popular spam crap like you get on Instagram

    Duke_Nukem_1990 ,

    Any great FOSS apps for that one yet?:)

    NumaNumaNode ,
    frenchdresses ,

    Hm, is there a play store link? I’m not sure how to put an app on my phone that’s not from the playstore

    phlaym ,

    Not yet, because it hasn’t officially released yet. Will happen soon(ish) though I think. Some mastodon clients work with pixelfed as well, although not perfectly.

    Hadriscus ,

    Don’t know about Pixelfed specifically (dont have it installed) but you can get FDroid from the play store and then use it to install other packages not approved by googul

    Salix ,

    but you can get FDroid from the play store and then use it to install other packages not approved by googul

    Where do you live where F-Droid is in the Play Store? In the US, you have to download the apk from the F-Droid website.

    Hadriscus ,

    France… , didn’t know that. Probably antitrust laws in effect

    mostlypixels ,
    @mostlypixels@programming.dev avatar

    It comes with a PWA that works well enough.

    lenathaw ,

    the official app works great on Android

    Tiritibambix ,
    @Tiritibambix@lemmy.ml avatar

    How can I find you there ? I joined not long ago and I lack interesting people to follow. Also, curious to see your work :)

    eugenia ,
    @eugenia@lemmy.world avatar

    Thank you!!! Here is my art account: pixelfed.social/EugeniaLoli

    Tiritibambix ,
    @Tiritibambix@lemmy.ml avatar

    Thanks, found you. Nice work you’re doing. I’m new so I don’t have much to feature, but I hope you’ll like my photos :)

    ruckblack ,

    Do you have any suggestions as to how to find people on there? I have it installed and am trying it out, but I’m running into a lot of the same problems I was having on Mastodon; it seems difficult to discover engaging content.

    eugenia ,
    @eugenia@lemmy.world avatar

    You can follow me if you like book illustration art: pixelfed.social/EugeniaLoli Another way, is to search for tags. For example, if you like fishing, you search for that tag, and then you find ppl that post interesting fishing stuff.

    christophski ,

    Is there interoperability between pixel fed and lemmy at all? I’m so sick of Instagram, this piques my interest

    eugenia ,
    @eugenia@lemmy.world avatar

    There is interoperability between PixelFed and Mastodon for sure. I often get a lot of likes from there, rather than PixelFed itself.

    jesterraiin , to nostupidquestions in Why does all of this alien stuff take place mostly in the USA?
    @jesterraiin@lemmy.world avatar

    Consider these possibilities:

    • USA is considerably new country and built with no distinctive, coherent ancient history and mythology. As such, its people often grab every opportunity to produce a mythology they can consider their own. It makes them perceive as unnatural/supernatural things we, citizens of old world rationalize, or brush off as of little value.
    • USA is an experiment by whatever the “aliens” are, so it’s natural for them to supervise it with more interest than the rest of the world.
    • There are no aliens, it’s just USA itself testing new technologies of theirs.
    • Other superpowers are very secretive by default and they simply hush-hush every sighting they can.
    PotjiePig ,

    Adding to this:

    America is often the voice of media, being the home of, Hollywood, reality TV as well as the loudest voices on the internet it’s natural that we perceive that to be the home of Alien stories.

    Being a ‘wealthy’ country: often a higher employment rate leads to an increase in extra curricular hobbies. Countries with less time to focus on things other than work will also have less time to expand on other interests. This can have a spin off effect of increased time spent day dreaming about lights in the sky.

    America is a very new country. There’s lots of vast open nothingness to explore. Considered a ‘frontier’. The concept of unexplored territory and unclaimed space of mystery is very much more engrained in American culture, unlike say anywhere in Europe where every square inch is claimed and has a city within an hour’s drive. All that empty nothingness with strange lights on the horizon can lead to more mysterious musings of what they might be.

    Semi-Hemi-Demigod ,
    @Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social avatar

    It's the same reason all the aliens Doctor Who fights are always attacking Britain

    Thavron ,
    @Thavron@lemmy.ca avatar

    An small criticism about your third point is the fact that the world isn’t the USA and Europe. There are many areas in the world with vast open areas. I do agree that in combination with the other factors it makes sense.

    twistedtxb , (edited ) to nostupidquestions in Why is the Connect Lemmy app trying to track me? (Answered: It isn't)
    @twistedtxb@lemmy.ca avatar

    It is not. It has been discussed countless times already. The trackers are from the external sites youre visiting through Connect.

    There’s nothing connect can do about the trackers from the articles you’re visiting using Connect.

    If you’re worried about trackers, you can force connect to open sites using an xternal browser that has tracker blockers features.

    MrStag OP ,

    Thank you for explaining it to me. Happy to edit my original post,wouldn’t want to spook users or tarnish Connect’s name…

    52fighters ,
    @52fighters@kbin.social avatar

    I use temporary containers in Firefox. Is a similar solution possible?

    Solo ,

    Look into using a dns that blocks tracking. I believe Adguard offers a free one. Nextdns offers up to 300k requests free a month. Controld also offers a free trial.

    agoseris ,

    On mobile I have my default browser set to Firefox Focus, which blocks trackers and automatically deletes browsing data when you close the app.

    NotAPenguin , to fediverse in It's weird that there isn't a US-specific Lemmy instance

    The US-defaultism that happens on the internet is very annoying

    Aux ,

    Yeah, it’s especially annoying when you live in a different English speaking country. I don’t give a shit about your pounds in the chicken recipe.

    milicent_bystandr ,

    That’s right! Put dollars in the chicken recipe!

    Anyway that’s my two cents.

    zeppo ,
    @zeppo@lemmy.world avatar

    Let’s say 2/100 of your country’s primary monetary unit. No reason to be US centric.

    mvee ,

    Pounds mass or pounds force? 😅

    Aux ,

    Freedom! Pounds of Freedom!

    mvee ,

    I added 3 tbs lead but it tastes kinda funny

    njtrafficsignshopper ,

    Do you plan on cooking in space?

    AnUnusualRelic ,
    @AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world avatar

    And cups, and spoons…

    Aux ,

    Yeah, wtf is a cup of butter?

    AnUnusualRelic ,
    @AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world avatar

    So refreshing on a cold day…

    Garrathian ,

    I’m just dumb and forget the world wide web is, well, world wide haha. I just live in my own little bubble sometimes but i’m trying to be better about not blindly assuming the folks i interact with on here and other places are from the US

    Blazingflames6073 ,
    @Blazingflames6073@lemmy.world avatar

    I immediately became a bit upset when I read this post and realized US defaultism was going to happen on lemmy too now. Very annoying thing.

    varzaman ,

    You guys are nuts if you let it bother you.

    Literally makes no sense.

    Spzi ,

    You don’t have to share the view of others, but can you understand how claiming generic names like ‘bears’ and ‘politics’ for something regional is annoying? Bears and politics exist in other countries, too.

    varzaman ,

    No, I don’t care at all. If I want to speak to Romanians, I go on r/Romania, r/RoCasual, etc. etc.

    We are only 20 million people. Americans are 330 million, and its an English speaking site. I don’t expect to see Romanians catered to in any way what so ever in the generic subs.

    UnicornKitty ,
    @UnicornKitty@lemmy.world avatar

    The US! Oppressing everything else in the world since…the beginning!

    InverseParallax ,

    Damn americans, they ruined america!

    cwagner , to fediverse in I think the average person just simply doesn't care about their privacy.

    deleted_by_author

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  • Ketchup ,

    What about a watching self promotional videos that promote ads on an advertising company? Is that okay?

    Dabundis , to greentext in Anon casts a healing spell

    Alright, you cast heal wounds. Any wounds on the legs are healed. You are now aware that paralysis from birth is not a “wound”

    Sewer_King ,

    Yeah that’s more regenerate or maybe power word heals territory.

    Dabundis ,

    Even with regenerate, what exactly are you regenerating? If the necessary neural pathways for the legs to work never developed in the first place, they couldn’t be “regenerated”. If this was your goal I think you might need to true polymorph a guy into “the same guy but his legs work”

    StrongHorseWeakNeigh ,

    I think it would probably require greater restoration.

    Also, regenerate would definitely work you would just have to cut his legs off first.

    Dabundis ,

    You couldn’t “restore” something to a state it’s never been in. Cutting off the legs and then casting regenerate would “regenerate” the lost pair of paralyzed legs.

    StrongHorseWeakNeigh ,

    Greater Restoration ends a “debilitating effect” pretty sure most DMs would allow a 5th level spell to cure paralysis.

    rtxn ,

    “Your nerves are forged anew, and your legs are as strong as a marathon runner’s. Unfortunately you never learned to walk, much less run. Good luck.”

    StrongHorseWeakNeigh ,

    Fair enough

    AngryCommieKender ,

    Simulacra and Clone, or Greater Restoration should be able to achieve the desired effect, provided a competent heal check.

    jabathekek ,
    @jabathekek@sopuli.xyz avatar

    I don’t think logic applies to healing magic in DnD lol.

    prettybunnys ,

    Is logic not the role of the DM?

    Gullible ,

    “You touch a creature and stimulate its natural healing ability.”

    If stem cells could solve the issue, it’s possible. Turn it into a surgery, high DC medicine check, or an insane arcana check and a DM would probably let it play.

    starman2112 ,
    @starman2112@sh.itjust.works avatar

    It’s explicitly within the capabilities of a Lesser Restoration, but also I would not allow a player to cast that spell on another player if that other player didn’t want it

    Edit: also as another person said, the adult who has never used their legs before never learned how to walk, so even if they had functioning legs, it would not help

    someguy3 , to noncredibledefense in But it'd be funny, though

    Russia’s WMD can reach North America, that’s why.

    hydroptic OP ,

    Ma’am this is a Wendy’s

    Icalasari ,

    And in theory they have enough working ones that at least one is guaranteed to slip through defenses

    datelmd5sum ,

    If you assume all Russian subs and planes can be sunk / shot down before they release their payloads, there’s still over 3000 land based ICBM warheads. There is no terminal phase missile defense system. Majority of the land based warheads will reach terminal phase. The extrapolation that the events in Ukraine mean that nuclear exchange between the two biggest nuclear nations is somehow survivable is both dumb and dangerous.

    Transporter_Room_3 ,
    @Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website avatar

    Well… The species will probably survive, as will a plethora of other species on the planet.

    The things that definitely won’t survive are modern society and it’s status quo.

    Nobody wants a nuclear war. I think we can all agree that it would be bad for an uncountable number of reasons.

    nuke ,
    @nuke@sh.itjust.works avatar

    Nobody wants a nuclear war

    👀

    Transporter_Room_3 ,
    @Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website avatar
    rambling_lunatic ,
    nuke ,
    @nuke@sh.itjust.works avatar

    NUKE THE COMMIES

    Ilovethebomb ,

    Nobody wants a nuclear war.

    Just a small one perhaps?

    Transporter_Room_3 ,
    @Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website avatar

    Okay you and Nuke can have a small one, as a treat.

    Go play out back, have fun.

    verity_kindle ,
    @verity_kindle@lemmy.world avatar

    They were in their Church Clothes! How could you let them go out in the mud?!

    Honytawk ,

    Eh, it will vaporise.

    skillissuer ,
    @skillissuer@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

    there’s a difference between WMDs that work and rube goldberg war crime machines. why do you think all serious militaries ditched chemical weapons and go balls deep into PGMs? hint: it’s not for humanitarian reasons

    rockSlayer ,

    True, but let’s not pretend that we actually found any substantial WMDs. We found 34 tons of mustard gas. At the time, the US had the most VX gas in the world.

    DragonTypeWyvern ,

    It’s a collector’s item!

    isolatedscotch ,

    every time VX gets mentioned i inevitably end up in a Wikipedia rabbit hole, it’s now been one and a half hours

    CanadaPlus ,

    And also is real, and numerous.

    andrewta , to nostupidquestions in I feel like a flashbang went off in my head, so the only question that I can think of is, "What now?" (Details in body.)

    Therapy for you to figure out if you should even stay in the marriage, then therapy to help you through what ever you decide to do.

    Mediocre_Bard OP ,

    I know that you’re right. I don’t know what I would do if I went to therapy and we determined that the marriage should end. My wife’s health insurance is through my work. My daughter would be wrecked. It is scary.

    owenfromcanada ,
    @owenfromcanada@lemmy.world avatar

    It’s definitely scary to dive into this, but try to remember: whatever the results of therapy, you’ll almost certainly be better for it on the other side. And your daughter will most likely be better off–because her parents will be in a better place, and because you’ll be setting a good example for her when she grows up and faces challenges.

    MerrySkeptic ,

    A therapist shouldn’t tell you what to do, just provide a safe space to explore your feelings, work through all the relevant questions you can think of, and maybe help brainstorm if you can’t come up with your own options.

    Your wife and daughter’s situations are relevant, but so is yours. If your wife isn’t in love either but neither of you want to divorce, it sounds like your options are to either work on repairing and rekindling the marriage within the constraints of her diagnoses, or mutual agreement to keep the marriage going for now but see other people. Both are full of challenges and risks. If she’s not ok with either of those, then you may have to make a decision for yourself.

    RagnarokOnline ,

    It is definitely scary. I want to remind you that you were once a decently happy person and that therapy (both individual and couples therapy) is likely one of the few options you have to move back in that direction.

    It’s worth it (speaking from experience). That weight on your shoulders is just waiting to come off, but you likely need a bit of help to get things started.

    “hire good private teachers, and accept the resulting costs as money well-spent.” - Marcus Aurelius

    thisNotMyName ,

    I can tell you from my own experience, you don’t do the child a favor by sticking to a broken relationship, I wished my parents have broken up earlier instead of pretending everything is good and that’s how a normal relationship should be. It took me years and I sometimes still struggle today to draw a line and go into a conflict with my partner to figure things out instead of avoiding the conflict

    gravitas_deficiency ,

    It’s important to know that, despite her youth, your daughter might be picking up more of what’s going on than either of you are intending to give her. Whatever you end up doing, having a real conversation about what’s going on is probably going to be beneficial.

    Azzu ,

    Kids are the best observers, better than adults, untainted by any preconceived notions. The daughter almost surely knows that something is going on and is watching very closely how her parents handle everything, that’s exactly what children do.

    Mediocre_Bard OP ,

    This is a solid point. Thank you.

    TheRealKuni ,

    I feel you on this fear, but that fear can be aired in therapy. Therapy is ENORMOUSLY helpful. And, not to play the What-If game, could potentially have salvaged your romantic relationship had it been brought in earlier. (I do not say this to make you feel shitty, but so anyone else struggling may see it.)

    My wife and I started therapy at the first of our communication problems. We figured we have our car in for regular tune-ups, why not our marriage? And our therapist was thrilled. He said he wished more married couples began the process when they still got along well, because it’s easier.

    But it’s definitely worth it even late in the game. Getting an outside, trained perspective on navigating the issues you have as a couple can dramatically improve quality of life. Even if you never expect to be romantic partners again, it can make you work better as a team for the reasons you mentioned.

    I cannot recommend couples’ therapy enough.

    Azzu , (edited )

    The only thing therapy is supposed to do is allow you to be happy/content with your decisions. It doesn’t suddenly make you stop caring about your wife or your daughter. It should allow you to find the best decisions. You’re still your own person with your own decisions and nothing will take that from you.

    If you don’t want to end the marriage, then therapy will never mean you’ll suddenly want to end your marriage. There is absolutely 0 reason to be afraid of therapy for this reason, in fact, it’s incredibly irrational and counterproductive.

    Also, the question is what’s “wrecking” your child more, an absolutely unhappy marriage and having two unhappy parents? Or having two happy parents that aren’t married? It’s not a clear answer imo. Anyway, after therapy you guys may be two happily married people again, best of both worlds, who knows

    KingBoo , to aboringdystopia in Chat is this real

    People don’t realize how important the outcome of this court case will be.

    Qwaffle_waffle ,

    It’s gonna be nuts.

    Sonotsugipaa ,
    @Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

    It’s certainly going to cause a reaction.

    uis ,

    Man, america is wild place. Do you have any laws there?

    Lets_Eat_Grandma ,

    It’s the law that the businesses get to screw you.

    Oh yeah and every infant is assigned an assault weapon at birth.

    uis ,

    Oh yeah and every infant is assigned an assault weapon at birth.

    Man, here voenkom has to find you and give you povestka to assign you assault rifle.

    Openopenopenopen ,

    Our laws protect what’s important to lawmakers, the giant corporations and billionaires.

    anachronist ,

    And laws that do protect the little guys get ignored by our right-wing courts. For instance, the courts quit enforcing the Sherman Antitrust Act because, in the words of Scalia, “it makes no economic sense.”

    oakey66 ,

    Only the ones that are written for and protected by corporations. Everything else is the wild Wild West.

    Crikeste ,

    Most Americans would be offended by your comment, and that’s why we don’t have nice things. We’re very, and I can not stress this enough, VERY stupid.

    Wilzax ,

    It will likely be dismissed as Disney wasn’t the company responsible for staffing or managing the restaurant.

    Which sucks, because I desperately want to see Disney take another massive L in the spotlight of the mainstream news cycle.

    TheTechnician27 , to science_memes in Sloths 🦥
    @TheTechnician27@lemmy.world avatar

    🎵 Two lovers forbidden from one another 🎵

    Zagorath ,
    @Zagorath@aussie.zone avatar

    🎵 A war divides their people 🎵

    LEDZeppelin ,

    🎵 And a mountain divides them apart, build a path to be together 🎵

    LapGoat ,
    @LapGoat@pawb.social avatar
    
    <span style="color:#323232;">...Yeah, and I forget the next couple of lines, but then it goes...
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">Secret tunnel!
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">Secret tunnel!
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">Through the mountain! 
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">
    </span><span style="color:#323232;">Secret, secret, secret, secret tunnel
    </span>
    
    Mango ,
    Bassman1805 , to til in TIL: The Black Panthers were key supporters of the Disability rights protests which eventually led to the passage of the Americans with Disabilities act

    They also were allied with groups of confederate rednecks with the understanding “we have incredibly different worldviews, but we’re both poor and it’s because of the rich folks in power”

    The three-letter-agencies could not allow that kind of class consciousness so they assassinated Fred Hampton.

    over_clox ,

    And we’re still poor because of the rich folks in power. The next step is obvious, TAX THE RICH!!!

    delirious_owl ,
    @delirious_owl@discuss.online avatar

    Tax applies to income. I don’t think that would solve the issue for billionaires with no income. We need to just take their excess money away, in addition to 100% taxes on their income above a certain level

    over_clox ,

    Alright Mr/Ms IRS person, please do explain what does and doesn’t qualify as ‘income’…

    Their wealth didn’t just appear out of nowhere.

    delirious_owl ,
    @delirious_owl@discuss.online avatar

    Most rich people are rich because their parents were rich. You can do a death tax, but that doesn’t solve the problem because they’ll continue to unfairly hoard that wealth for the rest of their life

    over_clox ,

    Indeed, most of the billionaires were born with a silver spoon up their ass. But their parents were only millionaires, there’s no way that their offspring accumulated billions without income.

    delirious_owl ,
    @delirious_owl@discuss.online avatar

    3 billion dollars is three thousand million dollars. That’s enough to hoard for generations without being taxed.

    Or that money could be taken and used to end homelessness and provide services to pull families out of intergenerational poverty caused by the crimes committed by billionaire families

    APassenger ,

    They aren’t only using the value of their assets. Their assets grow there are dividends, there are payouts.

    There’s income. They don’t have their money in checking account with no interest paid.

    APassenger ,

    If your wealth increased, you have income.

    XTL ,

    Just because someone said they’ll give three hundred zorkminds for your flortz when yesterday they offered two fifty doesn’t mean you got income.

    queermunist ,
    @queermunist@lemmy.ml avatar

    Yeah… “”“tax”“” 😉

    masquenox ,

    TAX THE RICH!!!

    Taxing the rich isn’t going to solve squat.

    over_clox ,

    We’re not trying to solve squat though.

    We hope to help resolve actual problems on the Earth…

    masquenox ,

    We hope to help resolve actual problems on the Earth

    Getting rid of the rich will solve quite a few problems - taxing them won’t.

    over_clox ,

    You’re right. Eat the rich…

    youtube.com/watch?v=o-0lAhnoDlU

    LemmeAtEm , to science_memes in Before times.

    Making this comment because I’m seeing some of these issues crop up in the comments, and in comments from different instances that can’t see each other, so rather than reply individually, I’ll just make a separate standalone comment.

    It bugs me a little whenever people talk about how old a species is. There are different levels to how wrong it is possible to be about this. The worst level is where people think that it’s the individuals that are somehow ancient. No. The individuals from those times are as long gone as all the other individuals from that time. Most people don’t think that, but it happens. Another level is a bit less wrong, but still is. That the species itself is ancient because it somehow avoided evolution. Nah, it’s just retained a lot of characteristics. Theses species still underwent evolution, it’s literally unavoidable. It’s just that the way they adapted to an ancient environment still works as adaptation to the current (and intervening) environments. They haven’t gone through as many drastic visible changes because the way their ancestors lived still works for their modern iterations.

    So it is definitely fair to say a species is old, but it’s important to realize that that doesn’t mean it’s literally old in that it hasn’t evolved. If they are impressed by species that haven’t gone through a lot of apparent changes over the eons, they should check out stromatolites.

    fossilesque OP ,
    @fossilesque@mander.xyz avatar

    Sound off, king. You got good points. :)

    Tlaloc_Temporal ,
    @Tlaloc_Temporal@lemmy.ca avatar

    There’s a kind of half truth to that, in that a trait already developed is unlikely to simply disappear. Even if it becomes vestigial, it will probably stick around until something forces it out.

    Thus we get whale and snake hips, ecidna eggs, human ear muscles, and so on. All can tell us of the conditions in the past, and it would usually be more difficult to remove them entirely as opposed to simply not getting very big.

    baltakatei ,

    So, you’re telling me my plan to measure atmospheric oxygen isotope trends over geologic time by grinding up sharks is bust?

    Comment105 ,

    “Living fossils”, still reproducing and subject to evolution, but it’s interesting that they still look like the fossils we find of them.

    I don’t know how many are actually afflicted with the misunderstanding that these living fossils are individually as old as the fossils we find of their ancestors, but I think “they basically haven’t changed” and “even through the pressures of evolution which they are definitely not exempt from, they have retained most of their features because they still work” are close enough for a layman.

    joostjakob ,

    Made me wonder: how likely would it be that a modern ginkgo could not reproduce with an ancient one?

    match ,
    @match@pawb.social avatar

    say that to Pando’s face not online see what happens

    Dasus ,
    @Dasus@lemmy.world avatar

    Reminds me of the “nature always evolves into crabs” or some such meme where there’s a few examples of convergent evolution of the general crab form.

    Oh yeah there’s an entire article on it ofc en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carcinisation

    Elaine ,

    Thanks! I legit never thought about it that way having spent all my time in the bit less wrong camp till now.

    Kusimulkku , to science_memes in Many Tanks

    I feel like “Not an ichthyologist” is a bit confusing way for an ichthyologist to sign their email

    RobotToaster ,
    @RobotToaster@mander.xyz avatar

    That’s how the Spanish Ichquisition gets you.

    lugal ,

    True.

    Not an herringtic

    konalt ,
    @konalt@lemmy.world avatar

    you have to keep them on their toes

    tamal3 ,

    I… Don’t get this one. What am I missing?

    ABasilPlant ,

    I think the lack of the trailing comma is the clue here. The first three are email signatures. The last one is just saying “I’m not an ichthyologist”.

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