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kaboom36 , in We need this level of energy. All the time...

FUCK YOU I WANT MOON TRAINS AND HEALTHCARE

JoShmoe , in Not to mom shame...

She’s going places.

AnUnusualRelic ,
@AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world avatar

She’s going to the breakfast cereal aisle by the look of things.

JoShmoe ,

And not just in costco either, sams club too.

synapse1278 , in I guess that yellow part is where 'destroy your furniture' is located.
@synapse1278@lemmy.world avatar

The cats at my parents home have a portion “RECEIVING PET” that is at least as big as the “SLEEP”, they will never get tired of pet and cuddles.

Sarmyth , in Not to mom shame...

Mom brain. Judging by the ages of the kids in the image she hasn’t slept well for years.

Bezier , in I guess that yellow part is where 'destroy your furniture' is located.
@Bezier@suppo.fi avatar

The dog’s food part is like one tenth compared to the cat? What kind of animals have you met?

FlyingSquid OP ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

I have two dogs. One will do anything for food. The other likes food, but if you offer him most people food, he’ll either take it away and then leave it on the ground or not even take it in the first place.

Quetzalcutlass ,

Dogs think about food when they’re hungry, or when food is present. Cats will stand on you and complain for hours because their food bowl is only 90% full and they’d really prefer it to be 100% full at all times, please and thank you.

teamevil ,

I have a kitten than just pulled a 10bag of food off the top of the fridge while the old fat man encouraged him… Cats are just as aggressively food motivated as most dogs they’re just more evil about it.

SuperSaiyanSwag , in Not to mom shame...

I don’t want to bother checking the original, but it seems like satire to me

jdeath ,

i did the work to validate. it definitely is, lady is pretty funny

konalt , in Lil homie in Back
@konalt@lemmy.world avatar

What a great way to have all the convenience of a fish in a portable package

Batman ,

Can finally take my fish on a walk

Num10ck ,

maybe a fancy Saudi dinner ingredient?

EtherWhack ,
@EtherWhack@lemmy.world avatar

I’m guessing just for transport of super-expensive/illegal fish during a deal. (like the cliché silver briefcase)

punkwalrus , in Not to mom shame...
@punkwalrus@lemmy.world avatar

Someone did a study at MIT about tin foil hats, and found that not only do they not screen radio interference, in some cases, can actually magnify them.

Conclusion: The helmets amplify frequency bands that coincide with those allocated to the US government between 1.2 Ghz and 1.4 Ghz. According to the FCC, These bands are supposedly reserved for ‘‘radio location’’ (ie, GPS), and other communications with satellites (see, for example, [3]). The 2.6 Ghz band coincides with mobile phone technology. Though not affiliated by government, these bands are at the hands of multinational corporations. It requires no stretch of the imagination to conclude that the current helmet craze is likely to have been propagated by the Government, possibly with the involvement of the FCC. We hope this report will encourage the paranoid community to develop improved helmet designs to avoid falling prey to these shortcomings.

CosmicTurtle0 ,

MIT is obviously is trying to trick us into removing our protection!

synae ,
@synae@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

So tinfoil hats are pushed by the mind-controllers, and those that are persuaded by this weak signal start wearing them to receive the signal more strongly and be mind-controlled more thoroughly

Frozengyro ,

Exactly what the mind controllers want you to think. They want you to think they don’t work, but I know, I know the truth!

TurtleJoe ,
@TurtleJoe@lemmy.world avatar

Duh. Everybody knows the only thing that works is Velostat. You cannot use any other material.

MrShankles ,

Copyright from 1999-2020. Time to start selling off-brand versions!

Excrubulent ,
@Excrubulent@slrpnk.net avatar

It’s been used successfully by former abductees for 25 years.

i.pinimg.com/…/22b854e09dfe2c46ef5941e51d365444.j…

GoosLife ,

That is a genius conclusion.

Crowfiend ,

I was all-in on that paragraph, but then the last statement rolled into vision, and now I can’t take it seriously again.

fishbone ,

Correction: someone did a study at MIT about aluminum helmets, not tin foil hats. The important distinction being aluminum vs. tin.

Word to the wise: Only buy tin for your protective day wear, as it hasn’t been proven ineffective at blocking radio waves by MIT, unlike aluminum. Stay safe out there!

Quick addendum: This is a bit. Don’t come after me, Big Aluminum.

KillingTimeItself ,

aluminum vs. tin

isnt most if not all tinfoilj just aluminum foil these days? It’s one of the legacy terms that nobody really uses correctly anymore.

NegativeInf ,

Correct!

AeonFelis ,

Obviously an Illuminati plot to prevent us from effectively shielding ourselves from their mind control.

KillingTimeItself ,

oh shit, my bad.

AeonFelis ,

No, your statement was 100% correct. What I’m saying is that the Illuminati were the ones who changed the material tinfoil is made of in order to make it less effective.

KillingTimeItself ,

oh shit, you’re right, this is a conspiracy!

dodgy_bagel , (edited )

There is also steel and gold foil. Neither is great for hats, but they’re still options!

radicalautonomy , (edited )
@radicalautonomy@lemmy.world avatar

“Oh…no, no, no honey, the steel foil hat doesn’t go with that outfit, try the gold one.”

JovialMicrobial ,

They could start wearing those lead vests radiologists put on you when you get an xray alongside the aluminum hats. We know those definitely block radiation at least. Maybe a combo would make it block mind control rays extra good.

dodgy_bagel , (edited )

If we’re in the business of blocking/absorbing signals instead of reflecting them, apparently cesium bromide is a solid choice.

www.photonics.com/Articles/…/a25495

Quetzalcutlass , (edited ) in I guess that yellow part is where 'destroy your furniture' is located.

Having owned a beagle, its brain looked more like the cat image but with “murder” replaced with more food “not food, but I’ll eat it anyway”.

FlyingSquid OP ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

I have a pit bull/dalmatian mix (at least we think so) and she has “murder” as a significant part of her brain considering she’s happily killed countless animals (and brought many through the dog door). She usually doesn’t eat them, she just kills them and hangs on to them like a trophy until we can get them away from her, which is not easy.

Also, the best day of her life is when some stupid bunny decided to give birth to her babies in our back yard and she found them and ate all of them, slurping them up one by one like spaghetti as we watched in horror. It was the best day of her life.

Quetzalcutlass , (edited )

Prey drive is no joke. My sister has a heeler/corgi mix, and taking her for a walk is an exercise in not dislocating your arm whenever she spots a small animal. She’s adorabloodthirsty.

Oddly her other dog, a heeler/pit mix, is super chill with no apparent prey drive whatsoever. I’m pretty sure you could hold a baby bird in front of his face and he’d just sniff at it dumbly with his tail wagging.

Mammothmothman ,

I had a bordercollie that would eat feces. Also a lab cross who would chew carpet, fun times chasing him around trying to pull the dangling poop out of his but.

Ghostalmedia , in I guess that yellow part is where 'destroy your furniture' is located.
@Ghostalmedia@lemmy.world avatar

Puppies destroy your furniture for a few months if you’re not paying attention. Cats demand sacrificial furniture that they can fuck up life.

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/4786ac2e-9092-4262-a622-d48a738207af.jpeg

FlyingSquid OP ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

The youngest we have ever gotten a dog is six months, so they do end up destroying a lot, but never furniture thankfully.

My first dog chewed up a book when she was a puppy though. I also once dropped a business card and she immediately grabbed it off the floor and ate it so fast she barely chewed it.

Dogs are weird.

PapaStevesy , in Not to mom shame...

That’s not how “POV” works.

jdeath ,

sad tire

PapaStevesy ,

That’s not how satire works.

jdeath ,

i said sad tire. wtf is satire

PapaStevesy ,

Not what you think it is

jdeath ,

fml!

andrew , in Not to mom shame...
@andrew@lemmy.stuart.fun avatar

I looked her up. I’m pretty sure this is satire judging from the comedic nature of most of her posts.

NeptuneOrbit ,

The kids don’t have hats. Does she hate her kids??

todd_bonzalez ,
gnutrino , in Not to mom shame...
milicent_bystandr ,

Also doubles for keeping leftovers fresh after a restaurant meal.

bitchkat , in My mom's doctor be like

My mom smoked until her last breath after slowly dying from COPD. I just assume she didn’t quit or slow down any of the times she was pregnant.

kylie_kraft , in The stats don't lie

you don’t really know why

send_me_your_mommy_milkers ,
@send_me_your_mommy_milkers@lemmy.world avatar

But you wanna justify

Guy_Fieris_Hair ,

By ripping someone’s head off

BigBananaDealer ,
@BigBananaDealer@lemm.ee avatar

no human contact

should be a very relatable line for lemmy users boom roasted

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