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Agent641

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Agent641 ,

Socrates would get banned from lemmy, reddit and twitter so fast

Agent641 ,

Octoria are scientifically impossible, the grazing territory requirements alone for a sustainable breeding colony would be immense. Any reports of them in the wild are either misidentified pairs of quadferrets copulating, or hoaxes perpetuating the psuedoscience.

Agent641 ,

Polygonal phylogeny

Agent641 ,

The dude who invented the brazen bull was invited to be the first to try it out. Based timeline.

Agent641 ,

You misheard She said she was a man.

Agent641 ,

Brain activity isnt nessecarily consciousness.

Agent641 ,

Saying “you too” to the waiter after he says “enjoy your meal sir”

Agent641 ,

One small step for a meme, one giant leap for memekind

Agent641 ,

I sense injuries. The data could be called pain.

Agent641 ,

Walk vs driving

MBIC my commute is 45 mins one-way

Agent641 ,

The salt is good for electrolytes

Agent641 ,

Count the candles on its birthday cake

Agent641 ,

If my therapist and my dealer both failed at getting me to do tgat, what chance you think you have?

Agent641 ,

My cholesterol level is under attack

Agent641 ,

Werent there like 5 other buildings that got fucked up due to wpwt syndrome?

This is why I must eat 7 mini muffins, not just 2.

Agent641 ,

Imagine the patisserie chef at this hotel.

getting up at 4:15am

Wife: “Babe why so early?”

PC: “Its 9/11, I have to make the memorial muffins.”

Later

Hotel manager: Chef, wheres my 9/11 muffins? Its almost 8:45 we have to hit this 30 minute window, and there’s a line of hungry patriots waiting already!

Chef is crying in kitchen. The heat of the oven was too much. Chocolate chips are falling off the edges of the muffins and splattering on the baking tray.

Agent641 ,

At least someone other than me is holding my dick.

Agent641 ,

Sorry for the past, present and futer disappointment, homie. You know I cant help it.

Agent641 , (edited )

Pretty sure paper was invented a bit earlier?

Agent641 ,

My brother spent 3 seperate days in jail for 5 drunk driving charges.

I mean he’s my brother, but lock that idiot up for a while longer, at least.

Agent641 ,

Printers in general are the devil regardless of OS.

Three found dead at remote Rocky Mountain campsite were trying to escape society, stepsister says (apnews.com)

The stepsister of a Colorado woman who was found dead along with her sister and teenage son at a remote Rocky Mountain campsite says the women fled into the wilderness after struggling to cope with societal changes in recent years, but they were unequipped to survive off the grid....

Agent641 ,

Imagine the russians surprise when norwegian troops come pouring out of those reindeer in the middle of the night

Agent641 ,

How did Bill get that past the censors?!

Agent641 ,

If you pull the lever, ultimately nothing changes because the tipping point was wooshed past in the 1990s and this first billion will be the lucky ones who dont survive to witness the extinction of the human race

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