I've been Tooting a lot about my current struggles relating to: moving/changing life/changing routine/being social on social media. Maybe you've noticed... 😉
I'm looking for peeps to follow! Peeps to chat with. Maybe you've been in "my" situation, maybe you'll be in "my" situation (soon), or maybe you just wanna try out your social skills (like I do).
Please drop me a Toot!
:blobCat_angel:
This time, this Toot, I will be brave and tag the Actually Autistics group for a boost :boosts_ok_gay:
Be warned, I either Toot my fingers off, or I'll lurk from a safe hiding spot...
@actuallyautistic A while back someone posted a list of like 10'ish autistic traits which could be used for an explainer. I could use that list for an awareness training at work. Can the collective memory help me out? #actuallyautistic
i'm yet another #ActuallyAutistic#trans lady on Mastodon! i'm an aspiring writer, musician, and digital swer, but not in that order. i rarely know what i'm doing and i think (hope) that's where i get my charm. i mostly just post about the #books, #crochet, #JigsawPuzzles, and hopefully some cute pics.
i'm also in my witch era right now, so i might offer some free (and likely very inaccurate) #astrology / #tarot readings when the mood strikes 💜
Just was ‘diagnosed’ with anxiety today after talking to a psychiatrist for five minutes (I’m using quotes because it seems a bit too preliminary to me to diagnose whoever with whatever after about 5 minutes of general talk).
Came asking for #ADHD and #autism evaluation. Was totally ignored on that regard) Of course, didn’t have courage to ask again.
Was it so obvious? Was I just a walking stereotype: middle-aged woman from a war-thorn country living alone who voluntarily came to a psychiatrist(doesn’t matter what else she has, she can’t NOT be anxious)?
Or is it just a general experience of most of #AuDHD female-passing folks: to be seen as anxious, to have most of their symptoms attributed to #anxiety (not like I was asked about any symptoms, but maybe have demonstrated some?)?
@ashleyspencer@olena@actuallyautistic Unprofessional!My assessment (in the Netherlands) took 4 x 1 hour meetings with me, with lots of questionnaires etc. to complete. This was with a psychologist. On one of the meetings my sister joined us, as a close member of the family. #ActuallyAutistic
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 223 , Friday 07/06/2024
Up around 6am again , my foot was much better but without the codeine to balance the side effects of the Colchicine my digestive system went on the rampage!
Lots of exercise up & down the stairs today - it wasn’t pretty.
Come tea time & I was able to keep a glass of water inside me, so soup & a bread roll has been consumed - results being awaited as we speak (7:35pm)
Hopefully all will be well & I can have a naughty pizza for tea tomorrow !
Final Thoughts.
I am so glad my foot is so much better, that was a very unpleasant experience !
Special thanks to all who have supported me with love & laughs ! 🤗🥰
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Was anyone else ever made fun of/scolded as a kid because you "were not assertive enough"? I would often get in trouble for "not saying 'no'" or other 'grievous' things growing up, and I remember being very hurt by that.
Saying "no" has always been hard for me because I've always struggled with being confident/setting boundaries. Every time I have tried to set boundaries I was perceived as rude, so I decided at some point in my childhood to stop setting them.
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Have y'all noticed that most if not all of your friends throughout your life have also been autistic or at least ND? I've slowly started to figure this out about my own friends.
One of my best friends, someone I met in middle school, recently told me she thinks she could be autistic. I told her about taking the tests on the embrace autism website and she replied "Yeah I've done that" 😂
Surprising but not surprising at the same time to me.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 221 , Wednesday 05/06/2024
Another disturbed night last night with my foot, but still up at just gone 05:30.
The weather today has got slowly better, with the evening being sunny & mild.
Turned a corner today , my foot has only been painful while I have been walking on it. (The caveat being that I’ve also still been on a decent dose of co-codamol.)
My foot seems slightly less swollen today which is also welcome!
Tomorrow is the last day I can take the Colchicine , then I have to wait 4 days to see if I need a repeat dose, I’m not sure how long it will take for my foot to return to normal.
Final Thoughts.
Onwards towards fully functional feet (right foot take not, none of this PF nonsense !) .
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
Sometimes it feels like there are never enough ways to prove myself before I’m accepted and my work skills, experience etc are valued.
I really suspect this is an autistic thing, because what I’m referring to is mostly neurotypical ways of “proving myself”. For example, social proof, rather than academic grades.
But it might also be related to being female and realising I am career-changing from a male-dominated industry to another industry that’s pale-male-and-stale dominated.
[Joking:] WHY am I doing this to myself?!! [/Joking]
I know why: I’m doing this to myself because I’m following my passions and what makes me, me, for the first time in my life. I’m NOT purposefully seeking to be marginalised and excluded. It just sucks that seems to be a risk, yet again.
I really want to work for a neurodivergent-dominant company! That would be HEAVEN! (I am actively working on this, and looking for ways to identify ND-friendly places.)
I was curious about an actor in a show I like, so I attempted to find out if she is autistic. When asked in interviews, she skirts the question, but she wrote a whole story about an autistic heroine where she plays the staring role herself. Despite trying not to jump to conclusions, I find myself making assumptions.
What do you all think? Is that bad? Should I try to resist doing that? Is that my brain trying to categorize everything in neat boxes?
@actuallyautistic#ActuallyAutistic what are everyone’s thoughts on signing cards (birthday, etc.) at work, where you do not really know the person, but there is an implied expectation that you do so
I wonder if its an ADHD and/or autistic thing to have your interests go hot or cold all of a sudden? Find I was enjoying a lot of video games lately, now its podcasts and book reading. #actuallyautistic
@SHODAN I'd like to know the same! I'm autistic but have wondered about some ADHD qualities.
First something such as graphic novel reading is hot: I borrow piles from a library and devour them. Suddendly they don't interest practically at all but I pick up my guitar and start churning out new songs.
The most important things come back to me. I can be sure that at some point I pick up the graphic novels or guitar again. It just might take half a year or three years before it happens.
Right now I seem to be in between of special interests. Let's see what's next.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 220 , Tuesday 04/06/2024
My Pavlovian response got me up at 06:30, so hobbled down to breakfast.
The meds the Doc gave me yesterday are doing the biz as far as reducing the pain goes, if not the swelling.
It’s so nice to be able to walk again , even if it is only a shuffling gait!
The meds are also messing with my digestive system, had an egg butty for lunch which grumbled its way thru me this afternoon. So rather than a some ham & a bit of salad for tea it was soup, again !
Oh I hope this speed of recovery is maintained!
Final Thoughts.
Every thought I have at the moment is directed at getting my foot back to normal & not looking like a prop front the Elephant Man !
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Someone mentioned "odd" sleep schedules the other day; I think I finally experienced a good dose of the "odd."
Went to bed Sunday night around 1:30 AM, slept until 2:00 PM somehow. Tried to go to bed Monday night at 1:30 AM but was wide awake. Decided to stay up until sunrise because why not, there was no point in trying to get sleep. Still wide awake, I thought taking a shower at 5:30 AM would be productive.
@actuallyautistic#actuallyautistic Any tips on how to deal with imposter syndrome? 😅 It's really been affecting me lately, and I'm not sure why.
I feel like I can never quite be certain that the things I KNOW are true about myself are actually true, like my brain is willingly playing tricks on itself.
Diary of an ASD Squirrel. Day 219 , Monday 03/06/2024
Another disturbed night, slightly better than last night because I had learnt some lessons on ewhat my foot would & would not tolerate.
Went to see the GP this morning, I have, in fact, got gout . So on a 4 day course of Colchicine … the GP was very specific about the 4 days - apparently 5 days = my entire digestive system liquifying & a decent stay in the local hospital !
The new meds are working a storm in association with the pain killers , this evening I am walking (well shuffling) sans crutches ! It hurts like hell, but importantly it is bearable !
I hope that this means that I will get some decent sleep tonight !
Also made an appointment to see yon GP about my ADHD assessment in a week or so , so the journey continues !
Final Thoughts.
I am so relieved to be coming out of the other side of this gout flare up , is has been one of the most painful experiences of my life !
Hopefully future episodes will be avoided via ongoing medication.
I really hope that seeing yon GP later this month will be a positive move in my ASD journey !
Thank you to all those who are helping me on this journey, in a myriad different ways. I am thankful to each & every one of you! 🫂 🫶🐿️🖖