filmfreak75

chevalier26 , 1 day ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic Does it bother anyone else when someone folds your laundry for you? I do appreciate the effort and the intention, but half the time I have to go back and refold everything because it wasn’t folded the way I need it to be for me to put it away or organize it properly. I would rather just do all the folding myself lol. Idk, I know that probably seems selfish but it does irk me sometimes.

18+ filmfreak75 , 2 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic is it me or are some of these options to these questions offensive?

apologies for the pics, was hard to get all the text in one post

image/png
image/png

filmfreak75 , 3 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic was in a group meeting with mostly well intentioned neurotypicals who just kept going on and on in a the most ableist way about everything

for context, migraine started at the top of the meeting us is going unabated as we speak

autism101 , 4 days ago to actuallyautistic

Do you have any clothing routines? I own eight gray plain t-shirts with no tags which I love. I often will just wear them over and over again.

#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistic #AuDHD @actuallyautistic

filmfreak75 , 7 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic just updated my standard bio for first time in decades — from the most recent episode of #DoctorWho

filmfreak75 , 11 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic what are everyone’s thoughts on signing cards (birthday, etc.) at work, where you do not really know the person, but there is an implied expectation that you do so

filmfreak75 , 12 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic has anyone tried this and if so, how did it work for you…

Autism & Emails Does A Disclaimer Help Misunderstanding

https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/autism-email-problems

filmfreak75 , 12 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic i do a lot of meeting requests and receive a lot of emails that start like this:

"Good morning!

I hope you all had excellent weekends.”

I start mine like this, and because of this, am considered an asshole:

“[Name] would like to set up a one hour call on this topic. Please let me know if any of the following times work:”

…because heaven forbid we be efficient and clear in our communication

filmfreak75 , 12 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic has anyone had a supervisor act so passive aggressively all the time it feels like they are goading you into a meltdown?

filmfreak75 , 14 days ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #ActuallyAutistic looking for non-rabid #DoctorWho fans for discussions of both the classic and revival series

and by non-rabid, i mean people not on the “it’s gone woke”, “Jodi Whittaker destroyed the series”, etc. bandwagon

kkffoo , 23 days ago to actuallyautistic

I found this way of looking at autistic and allistic communication preferences quite clear and interesting. https://youtu.be/H6Wf8Q3e6lg?si=acKu3fQaGPyEy9bf
@actuallyautistic

Ilovechai , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

I don't have the spoons to explain why I feel my neurodivergence is making this worse, but I need feedback or insight from other ND people on a unique experience. This will be a long thread (added in replies) but I'm hopeful there will be a few kind readers who either relate or have something supportive to share.
Here goes:
1/
@actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd
#recoveringfromreligion
#LateDiagnosedAutism
#actuallyautistic #neurodivergent

eo , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

"high functioning autism" is basically bulimia for executive functioning.
What do you think about this analogy, @actuallyautistic?

filmfreak75 , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic just had to change my out of office plans for tomorrow because my co-worker never told me she was going to be out and needed me to cover until now

yet i was chewed out by my boss in January for giving 5 months advance notice of time out since i did a group email for efficiency and not individual emails to 5 people

yet i'm the asshole apparently

filmfreak75 , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic just had to fake concern for a toxic asshole in my life -- masking sucks

dorgaldir , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic Dutch

I feel this so hard. Why can't people just be clear about what they want?
#autism #actuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic
#feels

filmfreak75 , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic it seems everything today is poised to tip me over the rage precipice i’ve ben hovering for months

filmfreak75 , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic i didn’t make it to 7 minutes of the 25 minute video — i like order and structure as much as the next #neurodivergent, but this made me feel insane https://mastodon.social/@harshil/112273758345114562

JeremyMallin , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

As someone who is actually autistic, should I use the ActuallyAutistic hashtag every time I talk about autism, or only sometimes, for more serious philosophical posts about autism? Or maybe only for my own personal experiences as someone who is autistic?

What do you do?

@actuallyautistic
#ActuallyAutistic

filmfreak75 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic think this may apply to some degree from tome to time https://mastodon.social/@nocontexttrek/112264664730462847

filmfreak75 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic going to film in person is one of my special interests.

this event is very loud and crowded, but i’ve been going annually for over 10 years.

if i had to guess, i’d bet there are a lot of #ActuallyAutistic people who
attend.

amazing how a sense of community manifests even in this environment.
https://mastodon.social/@filmfreak75/112265227857558204

pathfinder , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic

I once wrote about how it was not unrealistic, to think that there was no such thing as an un-traumatised autistic. About how so many of us have known bullying and persecution simply for being different. Not even always for what we may have said or done, but often for simply standing out; in all the ways that we didn't even know we were. How just simply being, was so often an excuse to be attacked or punished. That our very existence, even as hard as we tried to mask, whether we knew that was what we were doing or not, was the cause of so much pain.

All the scars we carry from misreading situations. Or from believing in something, or someone, and being burnt as a consequence. All the times we've tried to stand up for ourselves, or as often as not for others, and been dismissed and ridiculed. All the misjudgements and disbelieve and times when our intent and purpose have been seen in the ways that were never, ever, meant. The sheer inability for others to see us as we are, or to judge us accordingly. But, always to seem to want to see the worst and to base everything else on that.

But the more I learn and understand about being autistic. The more I realise that so much of my trauma and the scars that were left, came not just from this overt pain, but from the covert well-meaning of others as well. From my parents and relatives, from friends and teachers. From all the advice and instruction I have received over the years that was meant to shape me in the right way. As a child, to teach me how to grow up, how to behave and act. What was expected and what wasn't. And then, as an adult, how I was supposed to be and how a successful life, with me in it, was supposed to look. All the rules I was supposed to learn, all the codes I was supposed to follow. How to act, how to speak, what to feel, when to feel it. What I was supposed to do and how I was supposed to be.

Not in any unusual way. Not in any way that you weren't supposed to raise a child, well a normal child anyway. That's what makes this so covert. If you were trying to do this to a child knowing that they were autistic, then it's overt abuse. It is ABA, it is infantilising and punishing a child for always failing to become something, that they had no more chance of becoming than a cat has of becoming a dog. But for those of us who didn't know we were autistic. It was simply the constant hammering of the world trying, without even realising it, to fit a round peg into a square hole and all the pain and disappointment that came from their failure to come even close.

For me, what made this worse, was that it wasn't as if I didn't know that I was different, not in my heart, but that I thought that I shouldn't be. That I should be able to learn what I was being taught, that I should be able to follow the guidance. That I wasn't any different really from anyone else and so if I failed to act in the right way, or react the way I should, for that matter, then it was my fault. All the patient sighs and familiar looks, simply became just another reinforcement of my failure. Even being told off for the simplest things, became a reminder that something that I should have been able to do, was beyond me and always for the only reason that ever made any sense; that I was broken, that it was my fault somehow.

Is it any wonder that so much of my life has been about trying to justify myself in the light of this, of trying to become that "good dog". Of judging myself against an impossible standard. A constant lurching from one bad to choice to another, and always because I thought they were the right ones. And for each new failure and inability to even come close, another scar, another reminder of what I wasn't. Further proof that my self-esteem was right to be so low. Of how I was such a failure and a bad person. That I was never going to be a proper son or brother or friend. Because I couldn't even be what I was supposed to be, let alone what I should become.

Looking back, I can't help thinking about how much of my life I spent living this way; of trying not to repeat the sins of my past. Of not repeating the actions or behaviour that led to those past failures and trauma. Of, in fact, all the effort I put in to not being myself. Because that, I realise now, was what I was trying to do. I was that round peg and trying to hammer myself into the square hole. Because everything I had learnt had taught me to think that this was how I had to be. That this was how you grew. And in so many ways, I can't help feeling angry about this. About the wasted years, about the scars I carry that were never my fault. About the way I was brought up, even though none of it was ever meant, but only ever well-meant.

#Autism
#Actuallyautistic

filmfreak75 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic @autistics #ActuallyAutistic i had an all too familiar feeling today during my last Zoom call -- extreme sensory overload

i never knew there was an actual thing i could identify and explain to people that would not make me sound crazy

how my life could have been different had i been diagnosed 40+ years ago

autism101 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

Disney is updating its Disability Access program because they say it is being abused. Their solution? You must get prior approval by using Disney's virtual video chat system to speak with a member of the accessibility team.

#ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic

https://www.disabilityscoop.com/2024/04/10/disney-revamping-disability-access-policies-at-theme-parks/30825/

filmfreak75 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@autistics @actuallyautistic someone at work sent me a bunch of stuff on “System Thinking” -- never heard of this before and based on how passive aggressive my work environment is, i am very apprehensive about it

youronlyone , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

How do you define the term, “Openly Autistic”?

• Is it an autistic person who rarely masks?
• Or, an autistic who isn't afraid and/or shy to share that they are actually autistic?
• Or, an autistic person who is active in the autism acceptance “movement” (if we can call it that)?
• Or, perhaps, an autistic who were interviewed and disclosed they're autistic?

Maybe you have other considerations or criteria that defines “openly autistic” for you?

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NOTE: Being openly autistic is a choice and is not for everyone. I think it is safe to say that we all face discrimination, stereotyping, and prejudice for being actually autistics, thus, most choose not to be open about it.

However, recently, there has been a slow growth in numbers of openly autistics, and like with most things in life, we have different criteria, definitions, and cultural considerations.

Thus, I am curious what you think, personally or maybe your immediate environment or organisation, is an openly autistic person. Or, when do you consider one as openly autistic.

Again, this is not about if an autistic person should be openly autistic or not. ^_^

Thank you for your interesting insights!

---

• Autism symbol by: MissLunaRose12
• License: CC By-SA 4.0 International
• Source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Autism_Symbol_Proposed_2.png

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Tags: #OpenlyAutistic #OpenlyAutistics #ActuallyAutistic #ActuallyAutistics #AskingAutistics #Autistic #Autistics #Autism #AutismSpectrum #AutismAwareness #AutismAcceptance

Groups: @autistics @actuallyautistic

mraharrison , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic Hi all #ActuallyAutistic adults over 40, who were late diagnosed like me to share experiences. What's the best thing you did once you knew?