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niktemadur

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niktemadur ,

Ooh la lá!

niktemadur ,

🎶 Harley David son of a bitch 🎵

niktemadur ,

You say baked jeans
I say jaked beans

niktemadur ,

Since you put it that way, I can proudly recall that day I woke up with the backyard on fire during a Santa Ana wind event. It wasn’t really a backyard, I lived in a cabin and it was a canyon full of dry shrubs, so imagine the amount of smoke and ashes being blasted my way. Some flames managed to lap at the walls and leave black scars.

My cat - which I thought was a he but turned out to be a she - had given birth a few months before, so there were a total of six cats at the time.

I got up like a bolt out of bed, and what did I do next? I ran for the cats, get them to safety. No wallet, no trying to move the car to safety, not even putting on pants, I ran out in boxer shorts with scared wailing cats in my arms, then ran back to get the rest of them.

Then suddenly things took an incredible turn:
The colony’s pvc water pipe behind the cabin cracked and burst from the heat outside and cold water within, a wall of water went up like a fountain, then the wind shoved it straight towards the cabin. Here it was in the middle of a fire, and it was like a waterfall on all four sides.

We all survived. Even the cabin itself.

niktemadur ,

The name of the book?
An Illustrated History Of Ketchup.

niktemadur ,

“We need ten painters to train as astronauts.”
“Why not get ten astronauts, then train them to use paint?”
“How about you shut the fuck up instead?”

niktemadur ,

Goat cheese sounds too strong for my taste in avocado toast, I’d like to try it with subtler flavors like asparagus, shallot and brie or camembert.

But then again, maybe the goat cheese profile turns perfect with a peach mimosa by your side.

niktemadur , (edited )

Though the language is currently problematic, it’s a valid message.

Back in the 80s, many people lamented how the word gay had been “ruined” for them.

From that time, there was a sketch by Toronto’s comedy troupe The Kids In The Hall of a little old lady lamenting how the word f-gg#t had been ruined for her. Back in her day, a f-gg#t was a bundle of dry sticks, “on cold winter nights we’d huddle by the fireplace and we’d throw another f-gg#t in the fire”, she says with a sigh.

Then she goes on to say how she used to like fisting - calls it a needlepoint technique - until her friends told her what that word meant now.
She speculates that the word rambler might now mean something filthy, too. All those lovely old words, now tucked away, can’t use them anymore.

EDIT: I am using a certain word in historical context here, got censored, so I edited it to see if it now flies under the bots’ radar.

niktemadur ,

Sounds like something straight outta Florida Man.
But it being Tejas is close enough.

niktemadur ,

This kid may yet hit the jackpot of:

  1. Becoming an internet meme celebrity…
  2. …while maintaining anonymity.
niktemadur ,

Balogney

niktemadur ,

There are plenty of men also into this tendency of hipster spiritualism - Alistair Crowley and all that shit, Terrence McKenna, wild body piercings and tattoos - so it might have been a fifty-fifty chance that the caricature would have landed on either gender.

I wonder what the crowd reaction would be if it was a couple in there, instead of just a single female.

niktemadur ,

Surely the list of countries/governments that don’t ever even bother to give their citizens a tax return is much longer than the ones that do.

niktemadur ,

The point is to give someone vulnerable a full life, with safety and warmth.
From your perspective, time went by too fast; from their perspective, it was a long and peaceful lifetime, they were incredibly fortunate to have someone like you.

Also, there is an implicit assumption we carry around that to be immortal is some sort of blessing or state to aspire to, while it may very well be that being mortal is itself the blessing.

In my opinion, the highest tribute one can pay to a departed friend and companion is to again open one’s home to another vulnerable creature and make him/her family.

Do it in your departed friend’s memory and honor. If you could communicate again with them, you would let them know this is part of their proud and gentle legacy, to reduce suffering on the world - “Look what you did, by being who and what you were for me in life, you opened the door for someone else when their turn came.”

This is what I have done, and do not regret a minute of it.

niktemadur ,

…but not before God has mercy on his/her soul

niktemadur ,

To be honest, I do not mind the Super Bowl getting ruined for these miserably ignorant and miserable knuckle-draggers.

niktemadur ,

Sheepsquash is just a fancy new gringo name for El Chupacabras.

niktemadur ,

Nilsson was also one of John Lennon’s constant drinking companions during his “lost weekend” in Los Angeles that lasted for over a year.

niktemadur ,

I once knew a guy who peeled and ate a full garlic like one would do with an orange or mandarin, while walking and talking casually.

niktemadur ,

“We’ll make mariguana even more illegal! With harsher punishment! And we’ll make legal guns even BIGGER ‘n’ faster! Don’t tread on me YEEHAW!”

niktemadur ,

Half a century on, we’ve come full circle.

niktemadur ,

Yeah… don’t worry about it. Here, have another deep-fried salt-&-chocolate-covered stick ‘o’ butter, you know you want it… here, c’mon, take it. Take it!

niktemadur ,

Scott Vern The Great

niktemadur , (edited )

Your brainwashed mesmerized grandparents and their lazy non-voting baby boomer children let Reagan through the door in no uncertain terms, and in that environment the 80s “hostile corporate takeover” and junk bonds fever set in; with bottomless greed as the virus, which like herpes, seems to stick around forever.

EDIT: a word

niktemadur ,

Yet one more item in an endless exhibit of how mankind is unable to standardize anything at all. Get TWO engineers together to agree on ONE standard plug and the assholes will come out with THREE separate plugs, completely non-compatible with each other, of course.

It’s almost like a miracle that we got the world to agree on certain things like time and timezones, a system of coordinates, the metric system.
All of them received initial pushback, and some to this day. Noisy, noisy fucking humans.

Did you know that for a few decades, every town in the UK kept two different times on adjacent clocks? Back when their railway grid was expanding everywhere. Local time and London time.

niktemadur ,

Have you ever been to an oil and air filter warehouse?
Some are more common than others, but there are hundreds of different types, and some of them vary by a millimeter in diameter from the more common ones.

They couldn’t design the inlet to fit a pre-existing filter already in circulation, no sir, instead of any sort of compatibility they felt compelled to make up their own fucking specification and parameters that varied by a tenth of a percentage point.

That can only be the work of engineers, and from the looks of that oil filter warehouse, or from the different types of electrical sockets, the contrary bastards are everywhere, they REFUSE to meaningfully communicate with each other, and will NOT listen to reason.

More recently, look at crypto. For every well-meaning and thoughtful endeavor like Bitcoin or Ethereum, there are ten thousand shitcoins. Many are just greedy con jobs, but many are also due to stubborn and petty, noisy squabbles over minutiae. Suddenly the whole damn space was a hive of useless noise and confusion.

niktemadur ,

Covid is real and dangerous when they feel like justifying their racism.

Yet Covid “is no big deal” or even “is not real” like you say, as they threw one lazy selfish tantrum after another, refusing to mask up, abusing essential workers.

niktemadur ,

Ok, somebody’s gotta say it and it’s gonna be me:

Yo dawg, we put a shower in your shower so you can shower while you shower.

niktemadur ,

So it’s like Bitcoin mining, then, halving each time.

niktemadur ,

…said the apartment to the cloud.

niktemadur ,

Doesn’t sando always cut off the crust?
Not that this sandwich needs that crust cut off, it looks perfect already.

niktemadur ,

required components that protect your privacy

Talk about doublespeak. Double-plus-good, eh?

niktemadur ,

Looks like anti-vaxx pyramid scheme party food from where I’m standing.

niktemadur ,

What about DJ Qualls in “The Core”?

While being interrogated in his introduction sequence, he casually folds an aluminum chewing gum wrapper, puts it to his lips and kinda whistles with it for a second, while holding a cell phone in front of his mouth. After this little public display of phreaking, he hands the cell phone over to the hero and says “Here… now you can call anywhere free for life with it”.

niktemadur ,

“…maybe some HydroHomies memes sprinkled here and there, too.”

niktemadur ,

People have been constantly bombarded since childhood at home (family, television, internet) and/or church with the propaganda of bogus belief systems. Some places (or homes) are better than others. Others can be much worse. For example, imagine growing up in the mormon environment of Provo, Utah, or the maga environment of rural Atlanta.

Meanwhile, for one reason or another, varying from place to place, the education system has failed them, by leaning on the laziest rest point of least effort in blocks designed for fifty students at a time, such as rote memorization. See active republican sabotage of evolution, history or sex education in red states like Kansas or Florida.

Many do manage to escape this intellectual swamp, despite the peer pressure, but many don’t, and that spark comes from within. What makes the escapees tick? What makes them strive forwards, while so many others idle and stagnate?

niktemadur ,

Looks like a halfway point between Ethan Hawke and Benedict Cumberbatch.

niktemadur ,

I think that was supposed to be the point.

niktemadur ,

An elegant drill, for a more… civilized time.

TIL the trump campaign directed collaborators to forge and mail in false 2020 electoral documents to try to trick the national archives into certifying trump as the victor in states he lost to Biden. (people.com)

I came across a post in a Michigan community that mentioned this, and i asked if it really happened because it seems so crazy that Republican collaborators would directly mail in fake documents saying Trump won states he lost and I hadn’t even really heard about it....

niktemadur ,

You really need to be careful about believing everything you read on Lemmy nearly anywhere on the internet.

Too many people decide to not vote on entirely skewed cherry-picked drip-drip-drip, downright false often without any fact-checking except a tummy sense of truthiness. That’s how we get these passive hordes staying at home fondling their purity on Election Day, “bOtH pArTiEs ArE tHe SaMe LoL aMiRitE”.

niktemadur ,

Chad Thom Yorke

niktemadur ,

Many asteroids and Kuiper Belt objects discovered by the Keck telescope, on the big island, have been given Hawaiian names, adding to the very few words I knew before, like aloha, mahalo, pahoa’hoa and a’a, the last two being types of lava, either runny or crumbly.

niktemadur ,

Hunter S. Thompson as Santy Claus!

niktemadur ,

Fiddlesticks

niktemadur , (edited )

So OP is wary of being punished by stealing some new knowledge from the gods, just like ol’ Prometheus?

Stealing AI from the gods! OP’s liver being pecked at by robotic eagles!

EDIT: Live-streamed on Twitch!

niktemadur ,

Mom made me wash the dishes AND clean the cat box!
Math is hard, and I can’t concentrate on homework 'cause I wanna play Fortnite!
I went to McDonald’s and their soft serve ice cream machine was not working!
The Wifi was slow!
I didn’t like the latest Aquaman movie!

TL;DR: my life is a nightmare

niktemadur ,

Like that old Kids In The Hall sketch.

“WE WILL NOT BE TYRANNIZED BY OUR BLADDERS!”

niktemadur ,

If there’s something the internet has confirmed since its’ inception, is that humanity is both incredibly clever and incredibly stupid, in equal measure, beyond what I ever imagined was possible, beyond what I could conceive.

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