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TimewornTraveler ,

these “stop doing X” memes represent a low point for meme culture. extremely, painfully unfunny and yet ever-present

autokludge ,
@autokludge@programming.dev avatar

Pro tip - Simply eat a light meal of shirataki noodles, around 200 Cal. With any luck you can form your very own bezoar and rid yourself of this addiction for the rest of your life.

gravitas_deficiency ,

Well how do you feel about shtanding, then?

Bleach7297 , (edited )
@Bleach7297@lemmy.ca avatar

Shay, doesh anyone know when Sean Connery will be showing up to Wimbledon?

niktemadur ,

Like that old Kids In The Hall sketch.

“WE WILL NOT BE TYRANNIZED BY OUR BLADDERS!”

jdf038 ,

You all are so weird. I love it.

LemmyKnowsBest ,

This really is happening in current events

over_clox OP ,

No shit?!

gravitas_deficiency ,

What the fuck how is lemmy leaking into reality…?

Resol ,
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

I imagine myself completely exploding after about a week of not shitting. It’s still gonna make a shitty mess everywhere.

sagrotan ,
@sagrotan@lemmy.world avatar

Reading this shitting

intensely_human ,

I prefer Humans Against Masturbating And Shitting

Kusimulkku ,

Some Lemmy advocacy does feel like this

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

If I had three wishes, one of them would be to never need to use the bathroom again.

tweeks ,

Even if that would mean that we keep growing in size, fattening up completely with all we ever consume?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Well no, obviously I would stay the way I am.

Agent641 ,

Wish granted. You now have catheter and colostomy bags.

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

STOP BEING THE TRICKY KIND OF GENIE PEOPLE!

platypus_plumba ,

Wish granted, I’m the murderous kind of genie now. So… What’s your last wish?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Jeez. All I wanted was to never have to be around poo or pee again. Is that really asking too much? You guys are mean.

Bleach7297 ,
@Bleach7297@lemmy.ca avatar

Granted. You are on the moon (with empty bladder and poop shute)

over_clox OP ,

It’s simple, you just have to remind yourself of the difference between the words ‘give’ and ‘take’ a shit. You have to observe the direction of transaction, are you giving or taking?

And if you’re taking a shit, well where the hell are you taking it to, and why? 🤔

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

When my dogs poo while I’m walking them, I have to take their shit from someone’s lawn to my garbage can if that counts.

over_clox OP ,

Well clearly you’ve identified the problem. If your dogs poo every time you walk them, then stop walking them and they’ll stop pooing, problem solved 👍

SapphireVelvet84839 ,

Everybody jokes but one day there’s going to be a Cyberpunk|40kMechanicus|DeusEx market part for purchase, and the world will be further divided by those that need access to sewage and those that do not.

Olhonestjim ,

If I could buy an implant that compressed my shit into diamonds, I would be so happy.

over_clox OP ,

Were you aware that even the butthole itself is an optional accessory that can be removed?

www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbvLk_R4kPU

Can’t make this shit up 😂🤣

GregorGizeh ,

Im doing it right now, cope and seethe amirite

chickenpotpi ,

Shitting is so wasteful. People dont know that you just have to hold it in for a while, so your body can fully utilize it.

Source: I am voice actor for GTA 6.

rmuk ,

Oh my god it’s dickvamblerAU. Can you say “boop” for me?

dylanTheDeveloper ,
@dylanTheDeveloper@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah I’m a HAS-been supporter and I’m PROUD

fossphi ,

It’s not the shitting which annoys me, it’s the wiping. It’s frustrating and such a time waste

original_reader ,

You will find a bidet to be your personal saviour.

over_clox OP ,

Wait, you wipe? I thought 2024 was supposed to bring in anal dry cleaning…

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