What being #AuDHD is like.
I decided to make miso-glazed eggplants for dinner. I usually make them with some sesame seeds. This time when I was almost done, I couldn’t find the sesame. I know I have at least two different packs somewhere. I found none on my seeds shelf, I wasn’t able to find any from the first try in my a bit too well-stocked pantry cabinets. So I got upset, finished making them as is, and don’t want them for dinner anymore, and am now cooking eggplants with za’atar
Words fall into 4 categories: the words people say, the words I say, the ones others say, and the ones they write. It is becoming more and more clear to me that I can only take in so many spoken words before I just can't process any more, no matter how awesome, important, or anything. And the more words I have to process, the less I have to give back. It's like, all the words coming in push out the available reservoir I'd have to draw from for responding. I don't have this problem so much with written text, but spoken word is getting harder and harder every day. Which is nearly impossible to balance in a household that depends so heavily on spoken word, and spoken word delivered promptly at that. #ActuallyAutistic@actuallyautistic#AuDHD
I’ve heard today that #autistic people don’t form habits, they create routines.
I thought of my ‘useful habits’ - and yeah, right, they are routines.
But then I thought: well, what’s the difference then? What is a habit if NOT a routine?
Can anyone help me with examples of what may be a habit, but not a routine?
Given the impact this has on so many you would think there would be building pressure for DEA to get this resolved and done with. I guess as long as they get theirs everything is “fine?”
“The Empty Adderall Factory A drugmaker’s feud with the DEA is exacerbating the ADHD meds crisis — at a rate of 600 million missing doses a year.” #Intelligencer
Autistics can be extroverts. There are extroverted autistics. Social-emotional reciprocity or social communication “deficits” sometimes outshine the deep need for social connection. Never assume because someone is autistic that they aren’t revitalized by social events or don’t love to socialize. @actuallyautistic#audhd#actuallyautistic#autism#autistic#LateIdentifiedAuDHD
Hung out with a friend yesterday and he was able—ON THE SPOT—to ACCURATELY estimate how much time it would take us to go to thrift stores and eat lunch.
o. I am pretty sure I am #ActuallyAutistic , I had hints building up here and there, and then we took me out of my context, and I moved 300 miles away, and.. it’s like being off-balance every time I leave the house. Sometimes even inside the house. The question is what the fuck do I do about this?
@splott I always feel some sense of disconnection with the world around me, but I find it important to have spaces or activities to help be recharge/recenter/regroup. So I find myself wondering if there were particular aspects of your old home that you can recreate in your new one to help build a sense of comfort and connection… #ActuallyAutistic#ADHD#AuDHD#neurodifferent@actuallyautistic
does anybody know a polite and societally acceptable way to phrase
"dear colleagues,
i would love to spend my lunch break with you, but if i do so my brain has to spend 30-50 minutes being a) completely overwhelmed by the amount of social context and b) severely depressed about its inability to participate in any form of group conversation.
if i am lucky this means a whole workday without a proper break, when unlucky this gets me an extra little mini meltdown in the afternoon which then renders me unable to work for several hours / the rest of the day.
love, pinkie"
About 10 minutes away from parent teacher conference. There will be 8-10 people reading from their report over the 30 minute length of the meeting.
I’ve decided that I’ll zoom from my phone so I can’t possibly read along. No, feel free to read it as you intended. If you want to save time, listen to my repeated requests that you email a copy at least a day before. That is all. Suffer away.
I came to my #actuallyautistic self-realization via #HSP. I've always been sensitive to people's energy. I'm not always able to decipher it but I pick up on it and feel it and have always been suspicious of people. Which has fed into my low self-esteem. I mean, I think I'm awesome and that they are all wrong. But I still feel it and then I ruminate.
@sebwhatever My biggest struggles with self-esteem arise from my discord in social situations and overactive thought processes. So I #filter / #mask to avoid/inhibit experiencing these. Sometimes this takes the form of #avoidance of people and situations altogether. I don’t know I’ll ever find a happy medium. I do enjoy being able to talk about these challenges and comparing notes with others. It helps to know we’re not alone.
Following diagnosis, you have a new vocabulary that you didn't have before, to explain feelings (etc) that you didn't recognise, or didn't know you had, before.
As a result, your outward behaviour can become more obviously autistic; perhaps it might seem "heightened".
I don't know of articles, though. Maybe someone else does?
A couple of months ago, I read something on here that quite literally changed my life. It sent me on an unexpected journey of self-discovery that continues to this day. When you’re 54, you don’t expect too many surprises about who you are. But when I read a thread on here about being autistic, something just clicked. So I went down the rabbit hole, read a bunch of articles, did some self-evaluations, and came to the inescapable conclusion that I am autistic. #actuallyautistic
@johncormier YES! I often report that #unmasking feels so much like #ComingOut as #LGBTQ. Your description is spot on. The process never ends, especially when our difference is #invisible. I really appreciate your sharing your journey though! It’s a message more people should hear. The struggle is real.
@finnbar_m I have very mixed feelings about the show “Love on the Spectrum.” I love that we get more visibility. I wonder though about the prejudice and stereotypes it may reinforce, based on staff selection of cast members and editing. I also wonder how cast members feel the camera and editing affects their experience and the dating situation.
My spouse delights me. I've been rumbling this week as we get ready for a move and swamped by shame for my reactions—I hate feeling out of control.
They gave me a gift. I did not respond to the gift, felt awful for not acknowledging it, and then excessively apologized.
Spouse: "I never expect you to be excited about chocolate. If it were an appropriately shaped Reese's, that would be a whole different story." #autistic#actuallyautistic#audhd#AuDHDcouple
@actuallyautistic
Their comment made me feel loved and seen and brightened my evening. I have a particular way of eating certain foods and disassembling them in an order, which makes me very happy. When I struggle to be compassionate with myself or gentle with others, they still reach out to me. #audhd#actuallyautistic#autism#autistic
Not only did my blog post go out several days early (whoops), but it's also a bit of a wandering rant prompted by Shop the DSM–5 Collection and an interaction with my #autistic niece on Pokémon. #neurodivergent#audhd#actuallyautistic#autism#adhd
I was given the opportunity to push out an update to the first edition of the Late-Identified #AuDHD workbook. It is always embarrassing to find a typo—even with multiple editors, beta/ARC readers, + the hundreds of times I have read through it—but correcting mistakes is also a privilege. While I was updating the typo, I updated my reference to AANE. They recently updated their name to the Association for #Autism and #Neurodiversity. #actuallyautistic@actuallyautistic#ADHD
When people find out I’m #ActuallyAutistic & (well-meaning but problematically) say something like “Don’t worry, you can’t tell!”
I think to myself “You’ve obviously never seen me zoned out at the grocery store w/my over-ear headphones, making clicking noises in my throat & doing god-knows-what kind of hand movements that feel good in the moment”
I find it extremely hard to ask for accommodations (much harder than even asking first help). Like, I don’t want to be perceived as arrogant and entitled, I don’t want to bother other people, I think other people don’t owe me anything, so I kinda don’t feel like I have a right to ask. Like, it’s my problem, I shouldn’t turn it into theirs.
I wonder how other #neurodivergent folks feel about that. Do you think it’s something we’ve been taught? @actuallyautistic#ADHD#AuDHD