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programmer_humor

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PoastRotato , in No common rube
@PoastRotato@lemmy.world avatar

If I had a nickel for every time I was troubleshooting with a friend and discovered they thought turning the monitor off and on again was “rebooting the computer” I’d be depressingly wealthy.

tooclose104 ,
@tooclose104@lemmy.ca avatar

“What do you see when it’s coming back up?”

“Right back to the problem I’m having!”

“So you don’t see [insert OEM logo here]?”

“Nope. And it’s still frozen!”

“Where’s the power button you’re holding down?”

“On the monitor!”

Open the window and throw it out, please

jodanlime ,
@jodanlime@midwest.social avatar

I once did a house call over an hour away to turn on elderly couples monitor back on. Didn’t feel good about giving them the bill.

suction ,

Just imagine they’re MAGA

s12 ,

*Shuts the laptop lid and opens it.
“Ok! It’s restarted”
IT person: “Well that was certainly quick. Are you sure you restarted it?”
Person: *Feels smug about how they were able to restart quicker than most people.

astronaut_sloth , in I Will Fucking Piledrive You if You mention AI Again
@astronaut_sloth@mander.xyz avatar

YES! I study AI, and this is exactly how I feel!

Side note-One of my favorite things to do is ask people what their use case for using AI is, and watch them sputter out “uh…emails and productivity and things.”

jballs ,
@jballs@sh.itjust.works avatar

I got pulled into a meeting with a team from AWS. I was told they were looking to implement a new solution, so I had to explain in detail how our data lake and data warehouse solution worked. I showed them how we pull data from all these different sources, how we have different integration patterns, etc.

At the end of my presentation, I asked “does that give you what you guys need? Or do I need to go into any more detail about anything specific? I don’t know what you all are actually building, so I’d be happy to provide more detail where you need it.”

Their response was “yeah that was all great info. We’re looking to build an app using AI and ML that allows you to run the business with a click of a button.”

I’m glad it was a remote meeting without cameras, because I literally face palmed. They didn’t have an actual use case or problem they were trying to solve. They were literally just selling a solution built on AI and ML. They didn’t know what it was gonna do, but by God they were committed to selling it.

Rozauhtuno ,
@Rozauhtuno@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

It’s got electrolytes, it’s what the plants want.

bitcrafter ,

Easy: recognizing bird calls on my phone.

finkrat , (edited ) in c/unixsocks for more

There’s a lot of us neurodivergent folks in tech because it suits our needs better than a lot of other fields, and a lot of us just love technology

We’re more prone to being LGBTQIA+ than neurotypical folks, scientifically documented

Makes sense tech would have more trans folks as a result, we pad the numbers a lil bit

This is of course a generalization and actual ND/LGBTQIA+ presence is going to vary based on job, location, how insufferable management is, etc, and not all NDs are LGBTQIA+ and vice versa.

blazeknave ,

Gender is a neurotypical construct

DaPorkchop_ ,

…are you trying to imply that all neurodivergent people are LGBT+?

plistig ,

I guess they are saying that everyone is queer, actually, but only neurodivers people are aware of that.

blazeknave ,

I wasn’t saying the latter but that’s an interesting idea. Not the former per se- the cis heteronormative gender and sexuality binary is bullshit and only exists bc religion (capitalism… moar serfs in fields) and generations of fear. There’s tons of fluidity in earlier civilizations and more in nature.

I’d just like to hear some comments from all the downvoters. Odd thing to get so defensive about Lemmy

feedum_sneedson ,

Neuromancers

blazeknave ,

No.

finkrat , in It's time to mentally prepare yourselves for this

That’s it, I’m only using epoch from now on, that’s enough of your time zone shenanigans

FaceDeer ,
@FaceDeer@fedia.io avatar

I suspect that won't help. The reason the Moon needs a time zone is because of gravitational time dilation, time literally runs slower down here on Earth's surface relative to the Moon's surface. A computer on the Moon gains an extra 58.7 microseconds each Earth day, so if you're programming something that'll be running on Lunar time you'll need to account for that.

JoeCoT ,

The point of the lunar time zone is not to have a specific UTC offset like other timezones. The moon would have its own set of atomic clocks, and time could be coordinated with earth based on ratio instead of offset.

FaceDeer ,
@FaceDeer@fedia.io avatar

They're not going to be maintaining literal atomic clocks on the Moon for this. They'll apply a mathematical adjustment to UTC based on what the physics calculations say is happening. The details of that adjustment are what NASA has yet to develop. I expect it'll probably involve subtracting a "leap second" from lunar time at intervals, leap seconds are already used for keeping UTC in sync with the solar time so it's an established process.

ricecake ,

They probably actually will end up with atomic clocks on the moon, or at least in close lunar orbit. If the plan is to have something like gps on the moon, that’s a first step.

SmoothLiquidation ,

Except the length of a second is different on the moon because of relativity. So even utc is wrong.

hglman ,

UTC doesn’t become wrong, you can either just accept a different pace of the clock, i.e. earth ppl will be ever so late to a meeting or it’s just a different kind of timezone conversion. Better would be to have a single time based on the reference frame of the center of the galaxy and everyone keep there time relative to that.

Vilian ,

just use a time based on light?, like meter is based on the speed fo light in the vaccum, or use atomic based times?, like how long take for the hydrogen atom todo something bla bla bla

ricecake ,

That’s actually what’s different on the moon. Relativity and all that means that time itself actually flows differently on the moon than it does on earth.

The actual problem they’re working to solve is around timekeeping and GPS applications in different reference frames, but it’s hard to make a short headline about.

Ahrotahntee ,

When I first saw the news I was thinking “there’s no way atoms vibrate differently on the moon” but you’re right it’s about perspective and I’ve realized there’s no way I’m smart enough to handle timezones on an interplanetary scale. I can only hope that the difference between earth seconds and moon seconds can be expressed as a consistent ratio.

I will gladly use some programming library invented in the basement of a university powered by coffee, and rage.

cynar ,

It’s not too bad. Relativity says that no frame of reference is special.

  • On earth, a second looks like a second, but a second on the moon looks too quick.
  • On the moon, the second looks like a second, but a second on earth looks too slow.

Both are actually correct. The simplest solution is to declare 1 to be the base reference. In this case, the earth second. Any lunar colonies will just have to accept that their second is slightly longer than they think it should be.

If it helps, the difference is tiny. A second is 6.5x10^-10 seconds longer. This works out to 56 microseconds per 24 hours. It won’t affect much for a long time. About the only thing affected would be a lunar GPS.

hglman ,

Galactic center is the frame to use for any space travel.

cynar ,

Unfortunately, it’s not a useful one. While we know approximately where it is, we don’t know how deep the gravity well is. That gravity well slows the passage of time, just like the earth does. Without an exact mass, and mass density, we can’t calculate the correction factor.

Vilian ,

i guesn it’s fine, just keep it updating, like the seed at little that got more precine since the creation of the meter but it got updated too

ricecake ,

It’s well understood math, but it’s “only” relativistic orbital mechanics.

It boils down to a pretty consistent number, but how you get there is related to the weight of the moon, how far it is from earth, and how fast it’s going.
Since the moon is going different speeds at different places in it’s orbit, the number actually changes slightly over the month.

They’re just using the average though, since it makes life far easier. We use the average for earth too, since clocks move differently at different altitudes or distances from the equator.

far_university1990 ,

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second

The second […] is defined by taking the fixed numerical value of the caesium frequency, ΔνCs, the unperturbed ground-state hyperfine transition frequency of the caesium 133 atom, to be 9192631770 when expressed in the unit Hz, which is equal to s−1.

Do not matter for relativity though, always same change.

Resonosity ,

So are you saying that a caesium-133 atom observed on both the Earth and the Moon to oscillate 9,192,631,770 times will not represent the same absolute span of time?

So, one observer will see those oscillations happen faster than the other?

Does this have to do with the specific gravity fields of both observers, in that those fields affect how the atom oscillates?

Or is there something else I’m missing?

If special relativity is the answer, all good. I’m an electrical engineer trained in classic physics, so I’ll rest knowing that I’d probably need to study that to understand the time differences.

NielsBohron , (edited )
@NielsBohron@lemmy.world avatar

So, one observer will see those oscillations happen faster than the other?

Not quite. In each observer’s frame of reference, time appears to pass the same; it’s only when you try to reconcile the between two objects that are not at rest with respect to each other does relativity show up.

Basically, when you bring someone back to Earth, the observers will find that their watches don’t match up even though both observers experience time passing the same way as normal (because the oberserver is by definition at rest with respect to their own frame of reference).

TL; DR: Relativity is a pain in the ass and makes no sense in everyday terms.

edit: disclaimer - I am not a physicist and have not taken physics classes in a decade plus, but I do teach science at a college. I’m going mostly on half-remembered lectures and some random one-off discussions I’ve had with my buddy in the physics department over the past few years.

ricecake ,

It’s that relativity thing where each person will see the oscillations happening correctly, but when they look at what the other person did, the answer will seem wrong.

The difference is small enough that it really only matters if you’re NASA and building moon GPS. MPS?

WldFyre ,

I vote for LPS, Lunar Positioning System, vs our Global one.

trolololol ,

Yep, and the math gives different results based on if you’re on the moon or on earth.

barsoap ,

No the second is still 9192631770 hyperfine transitions of Cs-133 on the moon and that’s the same length of time at least unless you want to severely annoy physicists by implying that the laws of nature aren’t constant through the universe. It’s just that from our perspective it looks like time is flowing differently there.

SmoothLiquidation ,

You are correct that if you are on thee moon and have a cs-133 atom with you is second will take that many transitions. And if you do the same thing on Earth, a second will take the same number of transitions.

But things get weird when you are on earth and observe a cs-133 atom that is on the moon. Because you are in different reference frames, you are traveling at different speeds and are in different gravity wells time is moving at different rates. This means that a cs atom locally will transition a different number of times in a second from your point of view on Earth vs one you are observing on the moon.

And it would all be reversed if you were on the Moon observing a clock back on the Earth.

They already have to account for this with GPS satellites. They all have atomic clocks on them but they don’t run at the same speed as clocks that are on the ground. The satellites are moving at a great speed and are further from the center of the earth than us, so the software that calculates the distance from your phone to the satellite have to use Einstein’s equations to account for the change in the rate of time.

Relativity is weird.

Tja ,

It’s like it’s relative…

ricecake ,

So, in this case a moon timezone, and more generally a “space timekeeping framework” makes sense because time actually moves at a different speed on the moon, so epoch times wouldn’t actually stay in sync.
If the goal of “time” is to make it easier to reason about simultaneous things, then space makes that way more complicated.
It’s just tricky to condense that into a headline that conveys the point.

arxiv.org/abs/2402.11150

gramathy ,

The concept of “simultaneous” breaks down over relativistic distances too so that’s equally fucked

ricecake ,

Yup. So building a system for “how we build time systems in different reference frames” and “define how we relate those to earth” isn’t irrational, just makes for headlines that are either difficult or very misleading.

armchair_progamer ,

!https://www.unix.date/

NocturnalMorning ,

Don’t you dare, I have enough trouble reading 24 hour time.

Coasting0942 , in Life Hack

Jokes on you. Restaurant owner too rich, behavior is within normal range for IRS AI.

Though the AI is interested on how your bank account is higher than it’s supposed to be.

itsnotits ,

Joke’s* on you

(Short for “The joke is on you”.)

Klear ,

Thank’s.

small_crow ,
@small_crow@lemmy.ca avatar

No, jokes. It’s plural because there are many jokes on you.

frezik , in I can't believe people are still using GUMBIES when there are so many better alternatives.

By the end of the post chain, I could no longer tell if this was a joke or not.

mindbleach ,

It’ll be extra fun in a few years when someone names their project after this joke.

Poutinetown ,

And stop answering on GitHub after 7 years on v0.1.1

mods_are_assholes ,

I’m still just trying to figure out if GUMBIES is compatible with my ReverMax Turbo Encabulator model XYZZY in sinusoidal repleneration mode.

braxy29 ,

nice to see another vxjunkie here

Naich ,
@Naich@kbin.social avatar

A lot of them were shifted 1 second into the future following the problems with the cracked frampton valve on a popular model of felindrical phase felcher.

Omega_Haxors , in Hey, I'm new to GitHub!

We’ve all felt this at least once be honest with yourself.

Valmond ,

Yeah I was like yes why isn’t there an obvious download binaries tab easily found (there is sometimes right?)

Gold goes to Qt though, hell to just download and decompress it…

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

there is, it’s called “releases” and it’s like 2 clicks to download an executable, it’s not a github issue at all, and github isn’t meant to be where you get your executables anyways

Surreal ,

I still do sometimes. Wish they release a build so I don’t have to download all the dependencies and learn how to use a new program to build the damn thing

Shareni ,

If you’re talking about the repo in the screenshot, it’s a python script, so a binary release is going to be fun.

If you’re talking about GitHub in general, you can download binaries from releases, if they’re provided.

sunbeam60 ,

It is a lot easier now that even Windows has a decent package manager tbf.

admiralteal , in FLOSS communities right now

The children do not yet know how much they yearn for the mines of listservs.

A new, novel solution to an already-solved problem that is worse in pretty much every way. But at least it is anathema to retention of institutional knowledge.

In short: just do a fucking PHPBB forum, it's better than this shit.

const_void ,

In short: just do a fucking PHPBB forum, it’s better than this shit.

Or a wiki or IRC or Matrix or Lemmy or Mastodon, etc. There’s so many FOSS platforms for this kind of thing to choose from. How someone looks at all those options and then chooses Discord is beyond me.

Semi-Hemi-Demigod ,
@Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social avatar

Mattermost is open source and has a ton of integrations with other open source tools like Gitlab and CircleCI.

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

i feel everyone has just forgotten about gitter? literally its entire schtick is being the communications platform for github and gitlab, and now it’s even been acquired by the matrix team!

Like surely that’s the obvious place to go?

frezik ,

Please, not phpBB. Whatever the merits of PHP as a language are now, phpBB came from a time when it was exhibit #1 of why the language was terrible.

Adding a community on a Lemmy instance is fine. Far less admin work on your part, too. Encourage your users to donate to the people who do run the instance.

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

isn’t discourse (important to note that’s a completely different thing from discord) just a modern and much nicer version of phpbb?

admiralteal ,

It's real-time chat. That's fundamentally different, philosophically, from the way a forum/wiki works.

You can cludge forum-like features into it with stickies and bots and yada yada yada... or you could just use a platform that is designed from the ground up to be a permanent knowledge store instead of extended, glorified AOL chatrooms.

centof ,

Discourse is a forum software. Maybe you are mixing it up with something else like disqus?

technom ,

I thought they were talking about Discord. Discourse should rename itself for its own sake. It’s easy to get it confused with the two junk.

ipkpjersi , in “It’s not that hard”
sirdorius , in Merge then review

I really wish LinkedIn would add an anonymous cringe emoji. I would use it on like 90% of the content on that site.

zalgotext ,

I wouldn’t even do it anonymously if I still had a linked in account

Pregnenolone ,

The best thing you can do with that shithole of a site is ignore it as best as possible. Don’t give them any engagement. They’re no better than rage-baiters on Reddit and TikTok

suodrazah , in Okay, which one of you Java devs did this

There should be a language called Cod. And coding could be Coding. Cute little fish mascot too.

bappity ,
@bappity@lemmy.world avatar

I would always pronounce it Codding if this were real

xmunk ,

Too late, valve wrote the source engine over a decade ago and I’m still mad.

TrickDacy ,

…?

irmoz ,

“source code”

Clusterfck ,

Code snippets are “filets.”

Amaltheamannen ,

There is Coq

Rowsdower , in Monitor Alignment Alignment Chart
igorlogius ,
@igorlogius@lemmy.world avatar

Righteous Enlightend

Amilo159 ,
@Amilo159@lemmy.world avatar

More like righteous, irradiated.

rmuk ,

Imagine having to manually adjust your tint setting. NTSC, man. Literally shaking in my SMH.

This message brought to you by PAL gang and team SECAM.

Morphit ,
@Morphit@feddit.uk avatar

The SCART squad of the PAL posse.

Sniper ,

enjoying your inferior refresh rates?

This message brought to you by ntsc

Honytawk ,

Does it have Ray Tracing?

mindbleach ,

Yeah, and a shadow mask.

SloganLessons , in They tried
@SloganLessons@kbin.social avatar

Yeah being unable to open… checks notes local news websites from the US has been a real deal breaker

kubica ,
@kubica@kbin.social avatar

Sometimes its relieving when you go to do something and you find out that you have already finished, lol.

amio ,

Frankly I wish I could fit more US politics into my life, so it's been hard, I tells ya.

explodicle ,

Then you’ve picked the right place my friend!

MDFL OP ,

I have run into this recently on several non-US, non-news sites. I have actually never run into it on US local news sites, so I don’t know what you’re on about.

SloganLessons ,
@SloganLessons@kbin.social avatar

Yeah it’s a tragedy

christophski ,

In my experience it seems to be medical websites and recipe websites

unreachable , in Error 502:
@unreachable@lemmy.my.id avatar

200: Good Gateway

newIdentity ,

No. It’s just OK

lemann ,

No. Shit Just Works.

JoeBigelow ,
@JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca avatar

How do you change username font wtf

fiah ,
@fiah@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

𝔶𝔢𝔞𝔥 𝔥𝔬𝔴 𝔥𝔢 𝔡𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱

QuazarOmega ,

It’s using specific unicode codepoints, you can find plenty of “unicode text generators” online

SatyrSack ,

I’m so glad Infinity just shows the actual account name instead of usernames full of emojis and stuff

AlexWIWA , in Brace Style

Python with extra steps

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