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programmer_humor

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BioDriver , in They Need To Stop Doing This
@BioDriver@beehaw.org avatar

You forgot sales

downpunxx , in They Need To Stop Doing This
@downpunxx@kbin.social avatar

this is where the art of bullshit ..... managing expectations, comes in handy

WindowsEnjoyer , in D or d come on

OMZ and TAB gang raise up!

redcalcium , in ಠ_ಠ

Loitering munitions are basically our version of t-800. It’s also not fun thinking if you have ever contributed to any computer vision open source projects and wondering if your code somehow ended up inside a loitering munitions drone because Iran who don’t bother to respect the GPL decided to use those open source libraries in their drone’s targeting system and deploy them in Ukraine. Maybe I’m just overthinking things, but would you lose some sleep knowing your code become a critical part of an autonomous system that can decide to kill people on their own without a direct human input?

Gabu ,

If a blacksmith sells a hammer, is it his fault that a killer used the hammer to kill someone?

redcalcium , (edited )

I don’t think it’s exactly the same. Now if the hammer has a mind of its own and can loiter in an alley and can decide to kill a passerby or not based on its own judgement. e.g. the owner told the hammer to kill passerby wearing blue shirt, and the hammer does it but has 0.1% chance of killing people wearing yellow shirt due to computer vision quirks. Does the responsibility of killing people wearing yellow shirt fell partially to the blacksmith? Did the blacksmith can sleep soundly knowing people wearing yellow shirt might not need to die if his programming is a little bit more better, even though he never sold the hammer for the purpose of killing people in the first place (it’s his customer that abuse it).

Kolanaki , in Stop doing Computer Science
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

while{true}{print “money”};

moneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoney

funkajunk ,
@funkajunk@lemm.ee avatar

moneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoney

samson ,

^Dmoneymoneymoney^C
michael@server-prod-$

funkajunk ,
@funkajunk@lemm.ee avatar

You ran that in prod?! You just crashed the economy!

Ddhuud ,

As an Argentinian, I feel personally attacked by that statement.

dylanTheDeveloper , in Stop doing Computer Science
@dylanTheDeveloper@lemmy.world avatar

I bet ATMs would have a while true print money function

coloredgrayscale ,

Almost:


<span style="color:#323232;">While (hasMoney())
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Print(money)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span>
odium ,

More like while hasMoney(){dispenseMoney()}

MIDItheKID , (edited ) in Intuitive UI

How the fuck else are you supposed to hold a Klondike Bar? This is not an end user issue. This is a engineering issue.

Edit: apparently there’s a wooden handle to the side. I did not see that. I regret everything that I have said, and I deserve to be publicly shamed.

gravitas_deficiency ,

Do you not see the wooden handle to the right?

unreachable ,
@unreachable@lemmy.world avatar

pirates only have one side working eye

XTL ,

I didn’t until I read this and looked at the blur again with a fresh new clue.

Knightfox , in Monitor Alignment Alignment Chart

It’s not how I would want to be all the time, but Chaotic Neutral is really great for reviewing documents in a PDF.

the_lone_wolf ,
@the_lone_wolf@lemmy.ml avatar

Yah, i will also choose this if i want to have 2 monitor.

r0bi ,

That’s my setup except I have a 3rd monitor in portrait orientation on the other side too.

AstridWipenaugh ,

I run chaotic neutral plus a laptop to the side. The vertical monitor is home to chat and Spotify.

DieguiTux8623 , in Programming Languages as Essays

Old but gold!!!

drathvedro , in How the IT guys see the users

I once asked some of my friends what they were up to at work.

An accountant friend said “I’m making a VBA macro to restructure and convert our customer’s XML data into an SQL transaction so that we can import it into our accounting system”.

A car mechanic friend said: “I’m trying to find the pinout for this obscure ECU so that I can flash in this profile that I’ve tweaked with hex editor”

A teacher friend said: “I’m setting up integration between moodle and shopify so that we wouldn’t have to enroll our students manually”.

And every time my response was “YOU WHAT NOW? You should work in IT”

And they always responded with something along the lines of “Yeah, nah, I’m not that smart”

And here I am, slapping webpages and forms together, earning more than all of them combined. That’s really unfair, but I’m not in a position to complain.

Anticorp , in Always commit

ABC, always be committing.

python , in Pure Evil

ESLint has entered the room

MeatsOfRage ,

Or any coding software really. Does this guys friend code in notepad?

war , in R U A Cyberpunk
@war@kbin.social avatar

I use my highly portable computer for PGP key exchanges, etc.

Matcraftou , in Ya gotta keep up with the times!
@Matcraftou@lemmy.world avatar

Especially the last one got me choking on air

nickwitha_k , in Imagine

No. Just no.

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