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lemming ,

I very quickly checked wikipedia, because I couldn’t easily identify the extra one. It lists all 16 of the 10 commandments… The table looks like different branches of christianity bundle some of them together (mostly various coveting) or don’t even consider the first and last a commandment, so they always only count to ten. So it’s an easy mistake to make.

But the fact that they couldn’t even count the paragraphs is riddiculous.

Jimmyeatsausage ,

Seems like the sort of thing people should know about a central tenet of a pillar of their identity…

the_joeba ,

But then they’d have to stop eating shrimp, so…

Cethin ,

More importantly, they’d have to stop the most sacred of Christian traditions: throwing a pigskin around while assaulting each other.

ChickenLadyLovesLife ,

As Moses said, “fuck the Cowboys”.

ours ,

The Lord giveth and taketh away Red Lobster.

snooggums ,
@snooggums@midwest.social avatar

The lord didn’t take Red Lobster away.

Vulture capitalists did.

tacosplease ,

No no. That’s from the old testament. Those rules don’t count anymore now that there is the new testament.

realizes ten commandments are from the old testament

This was done by the jews. I always knew they controlled everything.

tacosplease ,

Not a good look when something as solid as the ten commandments doesn’t line up between groups with similar beliefs.

Might make some folks want to look under the hood. That certainly won’t increase church attendance.

lemming ,

They are the same, just divided to 10 differently.

Contramuffin ,

I see that Louisiana is run by Clay Puppington… How many “lost commandments” are they going to include?

ASeriesOfPoorChoices ,

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/c03ebf23-06a0-4f52-afe9-61e6ba2dcec0.jpeg

RizzRustbolt ,

What do you mean “Thall shalt not horn in on thy husband’s racket” isn’t a commandment?

apex32 ,

Also: “Thou shalt not take… moochers into thy… hut.”

LEDZeppelin ,

Home many of these commandments their lord messiah Trump violates on hourly basis?

Lost_My_Mind ,

Oh, it’s ok. Christians have never read the bible. They just make it up individually.

dogsnest ,
@dogsnest@lemmy.world avatar

The fourth commandment says you’re a eunuch.

homesweethomeMrL ,

That’s fucking classic

RickRussell_CA ,
@RickRussell_CA@lemmy.world avatar

I believe the last two listed (‘Thou shalt not covet…’) are considered to be the same commandment, although they appear as two separate verses in the Bible.

Hope ,

It varies, actually. See the numbering section on Wikipedia for a breakdown of how different traditions have broken down the list into ten items.

dhork ,

Moses : The Lord, the Lord Jehovah has given unto you these fifteen…

[drops one of the tablets]

Moses : Oy! Ten! Ten commandments for all to obey

subignition ,
@subignition@fedia.io avatar

I love this because what if actually? What if there's literally a buzzfeed tier list of five things to do we're missing for a utopian society? And mankind fucked it like we always do.

Lost_My_Mind ,

Thats assuming you’re saying religion would have brought us utopia.

subignition ,
@subignition@fedia.io avatar

For the sake of this wild fantasy, yeah. I'm not gonna be too picky

Who's to say commandment wasn't "lmao jk ok but for real just these four things:"

corsicanguppy ,

You want the Council of Nicea where a pagan edited the Bible by decapitating people expressing ideas he didn’t want in it.

NeptuneOrbit ,

God gave plenty more laws in the next few books of the Bible. The famous commandments about not mixing fabrics or cutting your hair? Yeah Moses of the Ten Commandments is behind that book too.

MrsDoyle ,

What’s funny is that (according to the old testament) when Moses came down off the mountain with the tablets and found everyone worshipping the golden calf, he had a big hissy fit and smashed them. So then after doing quite a bit of murdering he had to go back up the mountain to get a second set. Exodus 32-34

I asked a religious relative how it was ok for Moses to murder people when he had only just be told by God himself “thou shalt not kill”, and she said it was because the don’t kill thing came further down the list than having only the one god.

match ,
@match@pawb.social avatar

Asimov’s Ten Laws of Holy Robotics

FiskFisk33 , (edited )

The bible seems to consider it murder only if it’s another christian.

[if someone] has gone and served other gods and worshiped them, […] you shall stone that man or woman to death with stones.

-Deuteronomy 17:2-5

If your brother, the son of your mother, or your son or your daughter or the wife you embrace or your friend who is as your own soul entices you secretly, saying, ‘Let us go and serve other gods,’ […] you shall kill him. Your hand shall be first against him to put him to death.

-Deuteronomy 13:6-10

ChickenLadyLovesLife ,

you shall stone that man or woman to death with stones

Pretty specific - I guess that closes the “get them high” loophole.

FiskFisk33 ,

I hope you interpret “to death” as an euphemism in that case hah

frezik ,

Moses: WTF is a “Christian”?

FiskFisk33 ,

Right, that wasn’t the right word there, but you get what I mean.

Artyom ,

Hmb while I go kill someone for not keeping the holy sabbath day and honoring their father and mother cuz god recommended it.

ASeriesOfPoorChoices ,

we don’t know if the “don’t murder” thing was on the original list.

rwhitisissle ,

As a note, the Israelites would in later generations go on to kill a shitload of people. It’s one of those things where it seems like the Bible only really considers it murder if God doesn’t sanction it. It’s honestly one of the many sticking points that makes Abrahamic religions a hard sell for modern individuals. That said, if you look at it from a historical perspective, it really comes across more like a religious version of the Code of Hammurabi. It’s less “don’t kill” as a philosophical or religious position and more about sanctions against killing in a practical legal sense. A functioning society has laws that formally govern behavior and the Israelites were essentially an ecclesiarchy, with Moses being both head of state and high priest. The same laws that governed social life were always going to intersect with laws that governed spiritual life.

funkless_eck ,

Moses himself commands an army to genocide before and after Mt Sinai

Boozilla , (edited )
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

Louisiana: basic literacy is not their strong suit.

homesweethomeMrL ,

suit but agreed. Edumacation was never one of the original thirteen commandiments.

Boozilla ,
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

Ha! Corrected. Thanks.

cheese_greater ,

This is my favorite bulkshit word lol. Ain’t nobody axxed but they it is

baduhai ,

basic literacy is not their strong suite.

Oof.

Boozilla ,
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

Woops. At least I didn’t confuse Iraq with Ukraine…this time.

Lost_My_Mind ,

…that you George?

Boozilla ,
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

On the internet, nobody knows you’re the 43rd president, just trying to put food on your family.

corsicanguppy ,

That comma could have been anything else and it would been a valid sentence.

Boozilla ,
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

Well, that’s what I get for punching down on our gumbo-eating friends.

Illuminostro ,

How dare you. We read real good in Goatfuck Holler!

ASeriesOfPoorChoices ,

*numeracy is the word you’re looking for.

you’re not wrong though, literacy is also not their strong suit :)

littlebluespark ,
@littlebluespark@lemmy.world avatar

In Louisiana, they think numeracy is what gets you run outta town or burned alive, and they’re not entirely wrong there either, historically speaking.

thbb ,

No, numeracy is when you draw cards to see the future.

littlebluespark ,
@littlebluespark@lemmy.world avatar

No, numeracy is when you goin’ around in public and ain’t got no clothes on.

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