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ASeriesOfPoorChoices , in Unrealistic Body Standards

I used to like leggy girls, but a new fetish is brewing.

FiniteBanjo , in It's like a more challenging version of the trolley problem

Can I save both but reject both offers? Because I can see value in them as very unique individuals but I’m not really into mules or women with bigger dicks than me.

TheRealLinga ,

Who says their dick is bigger? Maybe they have a smaller dick… would you be into it then?

FiniteBanjo ,

You can just tell, trust me. Professional dick predictor and gait reader, worked in physical rehabilitation for years. I can also smell thyroid disease.

davidagain ,

Hypo or hyper? Because personally, I’m not getting hyperthyroidism from that photo and I don’t know what hypothyroidism looks like.

FiniteBanjo ,

I didn’t mean I smelt it in this image, just in general I can smell it. A bit off topic but I noticed you’re a little low on Vitamin K, is it a dietary concern or have you recently used a blood thinner?

Praxis ,

Omg omg do me next

davidagain ,

That is actually properly scary.

ArcaneSlime ,

At best you can tell who’s a shower, growers still got stealth on ya.

generichate1546 ,

No‽

hungryphrog , in Not to mom shame...

She could just… wear that tinfoil cap under a normal hat to avoid attracting attention??

NegativeInf ,

But then it isn’t performative conservatism, and therefore is unmonetizable by the algorithm due to lack of engagement! And you gotta feed that 'rithm!

hungryphrog , in Found a good book

three nirds with one stone

Sanctus , in Unpopular opinion
@Sanctus@lemmy.world avatar

What an amazing new template lmao

hungryphrog , in Top post in the conservative subreddit: Being unable to work at a "woke" company

oh nooooo poor little white men it’s so hard for them

fossphi , in The most irreplaceable thing

Holy shit. This abomination maybe belongs in !aneurysmposting

pewpew ,
@pewpew@feddit.it avatar

There is a subreddit for this: r/laughjokes which this post was probably taken from

brown567 , in Hello lovelies!!!

I’ll have you know I was taught how to make potato salad by a Tongan dude who looks nothing like this

But yeah, I resemble the image XD

hungryphrog , in I guess that yellow part is where 'destroy your furniture' is located.

or “get zoomies in the middle of the night”

bulwark , in On the road to Valhalla

I remember that time I was a passenger on a bus that had to jump across something like this. Long story short we couldn’t slow down or stop because of the bomb. In the end everyone was alright except for the hostage that got shot in the leg.

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

I’ve seen that movie… Keanu Reeves was in it.

ummthatguy ,
@ummthatguy@lemmy.world avatar
the_tab_key ,

I was on the same bus!

zero_spelled_with_an_ecks ,

Don’t date each other. I’ve heard relationships based on intense experiences never work.

lightnsfw , in Another mystery solved.
SoleInvictus ,
TheSealStartedIt ,

Case closed

phorq ,

Good work Ducktective, what would we do without you…

chemicalwonka , (edited ) in Another mystery solved.
@chemicalwonka@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

Finally a pertinent question. Thanks

EmperorHenry , in Another mystery solved.
@EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

clearly he swims when he’s not in the shallows

EmperorHenry , in It's like a more challenging version of the trolley problem
@EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

lose lose scenario

stoicmaverick ,

Have you learned nothing from James T. Kirk? Let them both die, and suck your own dick.

EmperorHenry ,
@EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

and suck your own dick.

Not to toot my own horn…But I can actually do that to myself. I discovered that talent of mine after I fell off my bike one time.

stoicmaverick , (edited )

And landed with your dick in your mouth? I’m happy for you. I could when I was younger, but I got too phat.

EmperorHenry ,
@EmperorHenry@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

I kinda tumbled down a hill

This one street in the town I grew up in had one side exposed to a steep down incline. A big garbage truck speed past me while I was in the bike lane and the gust of wind created by it put me off balance for a moment

davidagain ,

Toot your own horn! Tee hee.
Anyway, nice cock, bro.

Bougie_Birdie , in *Eurythmics starts playing*
@Bougie_Birdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

I suppose if you’re going to die of the beetus it might as well be in your sleep

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