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lemmy.today

OpenStars , to lemmyshitpost in So versatile and convenient
@OpenStars@startrek.website avatar

You can use it as toilet paper.

Mind you, it’s not very effective.

photonic_sorcerer ,
@photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Instructions unclear, now I have an even whiter ass. Also something doesn’t feel right.

OpenStars ,
@OpenStars@startrek.website avatar

Throw in the washer, tumble dry low.

OpenStars ,
@OpenStars@startrek.website avatar

Don’t forget, you can always go to the booty store. To confirm: NSFW.

candyman337 , to lemmyshitpost in So versatile and convenient

Wait what’s that guy on the left doing lmao

Teon ,
@Teon@kbin.social avatar

Kneading his dough... O_o

OpenStars ,
@OpenStars@startrek.website avatar

I… don’t think we really want to know?

Possibly similar to the guy on the far right.

Dasnap ,
@Dasnap@lemmy.world avatar

Floueshlight.

Imgonnatrythis ,

What don’t your understand about ALL PURPOSE?

Cold_Brew_Enema ,

All Pumping Flour

FlyingSquid , to lemmyshitpost in So versatile and convenient
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

They say that, but can you use it to cure lupus?

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

False advertising strikes again…

MTK ,

You can use the flour to strike again!

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

The all-purpose flour strikes back

Imgonnatrythis ,

Not sure, but if you spread it in a circle around you the gluten intolerant will not come near you.

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

My wife’s best friend is gluten intolerant.

I appreciate the handy tip.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

I bet you could trap her in a summoning circle like a demon and make her grant you wishes or something. Like, I dunno, paint my chicken coop and I’ll let you out of the gluten.

gravitas_deficiency , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

Califournia would be a HUGE tax base, and probably somewhat annoying, but Fourida would probably end up starting the next few world wars, and at least one of them would be over bath salts.

BarrelAgedBoredom ,

Bath salts are old hat. We’re stuffed to the gills with fent and meth like everyone else now

Sorgan71 , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

Fourida because we could walk away

Vespair , to lemmyshitpost in With water from a rock and fire from Mt. Horeb

This joke is so old and obvious, that there was literally a beer in America named He’Brew for 25 years.

caseyweederman , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

Gonenada

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

Your terms are acceptable

Thcdenton , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

You can milk anything with nipples

Tier1BuildABear ,
@Tier1BuildABear@lemmy.world avatar

I have nipples thcdenton, can you milk me?

SPRUNT ,

TIL almonds have nipples.

SparrowRanjitScaur ,

He said you can milk anything with nipples, not all milk comes from nipples.

Cicraft , to lemmyshitpost in Please clap

please clap

My cheeks

waterSticksToMyBalls , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

Nohio

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

Aye, I could do that. Nobody would miss it anyways.

rockerface ,

Also known as: Ohno

samus12345 ,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

Ohellno

Uschaan , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

I’m pretty sure Tenxas would be worse.

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

Where would we even put all of those? Canada?

Doombot1 ,

Space, where they can’t influence things? They should be fine with their independent power grid, right?

Classy ,

Gulf of Mexico

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

The gulf says mexicno

TheMightyCanuck ,
@TheMightyCanuck@sh.itjust.works avatar

Please God no. We already have Texas lite with Alberta

Source: Albertan

MacNCheezus OP ,
@MacNCheezus@lemmy.today avatar

How about Albeighta as a compromise

reverendsteveii , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

ameroctopod

Agent641 ,

Amerachnid

reverendsteveii ,

This is better, thank you

Semi-Hemi-Demigod , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me
@Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social avatar

California merely annoys me. Florida terrifies me.

Namstel , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me

Utterly disgusting.

Zozano ,
@Zozano@lemy.lol avatar

Udderly disgusting

JusticeForPorygon , to lemmyshitpost in They're all dicks if you ask me
@JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world avatar

Let’s trade Florida for a second California.

femboy_bird ,

can we just get rid of both of them pls?

LucidLethargy ,

I’ll settle for sawing off Los Angeles and letting it float off into the distance.

maccentric ,

How about we give Texas back to Mexico (if they’d take it)?

BarrelAgedBoredom ,

While we’re at it, can we ditch the Dakotas on Canada? They didn’t do anything wrong I just find their presence irritating

samus12345 ,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

What did California do that’s so bad?

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