My dad broke the cycle. Late in life he told me a story about myself.
We were in a park. I ran up and asked for something and he said no. I ran off and then came back, asking again but in some other way, this time he let ne do whatever it was.
His mother, a deeply religious schoolteacher, was sitting nearby, and after I ran off she criticized him for changing his mind, told him parents should never do that.
I think he told me that story for at least one reason.
.ml is the same way. People were getting deleted left and right for posting about Maduro fixing the election in Venezuela. Not realizing itās freaking .ml. Even when told, āthe mods are just enforcing the instance rulesā they didnāt get it.
Thereās a few mods that bans people just for being liberal there. What fucking clowns man. Then their little minions come to .world and whine about how theyāre treated unfairly when they troll.
There are a lot of good answers here already, but Iāll try to attack the question from a new angle.
Firstly, yes: they experience an attractive force from the nucleus, and would in principle have their lowest possible potential energy if they were located exactly in the nucleus. An equilibrium state is the state with lowest energy, so why arenāt they exactly in the nucleus?
Consider that an electrons position and speed cannot be exactly defined at the same time (uncertainty principle). So an electron with an exact position could have any speed. If you compute the expectation value of a particles kinetic energy, when the particle can have any speed, youāll find that itās divergent (goes to infinity).
So: Because an electron with an exactly defined position must have infinite kinetic energy, the equilibrium state cannot be an electron with an exactly defined position, and so cannot be an electron exactly in the nucleus. So what do we do?
We have to make the electrons position ādiffuseā. Of course, that means it is no longer exactly inside the nucleus, so it gains some potential energy, but on the other hand it can move more slowly and has lower kinetic energy.
The equilibrium state is the state we find where the trade off between kinetic and potential energy gives us the lowest total energy, which is described as a 1s orbital. The electron is ādiffuseā enough to have a relatively low kinetic energy, and ālocalisedā enough to have a relatively low potential energy, giving as low total energy as possible.
Once you start adding more electrons you need to start taking Pauli exclusion into account, so I wonāt go there, but the same manner of thinking still essentially holds up.
Yes, there are an infinite number of velocities you can use, but if you look at their distribution, youāll find that it quickly goes to zero somewhere around 1-2 m/s, so the expectation value of the velocity is convergent.
If you have an object with a velocity taken from a distribution that doesnāt approach zero sufficiently fast as the velocity goes to infinity, the expectation value diverges. A simple example would be a person that would be half as likely to get up at a velocity of 2 m/s as 1 m/s, and half as likely to get up at 4 m/s as 2 m/s, etc.
The more mathematical version of the same argument is to compute the kinetic energy of a particle whose wavefunction is a delta pulse (i.e. a particle whose position is exactly defined), and youāll find that the particle has infinite energy.
Yeah, it started to really hit me when my friends starting having kids. Iād see them being so kind and patient and actually giving a shit about what their kids think and how their kids feel. Itās both beautiful and heartbreaking; beautiful to see that this is exactly how a parent should be, and heartbreaking cause little me never had -and will never have- that experience. I feel like this plus getting older has made me realize just how bad my childhood really was. Like, I knew it was bad when it was happening, but I donāt think I could grasp just how bad it was without some distance and perspective.
I havenāt found myself jealous over kids who have it better than me, but Iāve found I am envious of people whoāve had at least one decent parent in their corner. Both of mine were horrible people. And on top of the abuse: ADHD (undiagnosed until recently), depression, bad anxiety, CPTSD (from the childhood), and possibly autism but no one seems to want to test an adult so I may never know. And the worst part is realizing, in hindsight and through therapy, that my mom knew. She fucking knew how mentally unwell I was, and not only did she do nothing to help, she would use the threat of having me committed to manipulate me. So fucked up. ugh.
So yeah Iām fully aware of the ways Iām broken, and Iāll probably be in therapy for the rest of my life over it. Anyway, we deserved better. Everyone deserves a safe childhood with caring parents, everyone. Even you.
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