CarolynStirling

olena , 6 days ago to actuallyautistic

Fellow #autistic , #AuDHD, #ADHD and other #neurodivergent folks, do you relate to that stereotype that we always choose the smallest spoon?
I couldn’t relate to it because no, I won’t eat soup with the smallest spoon.

Because choosing the right spoon is more complex than just size.

For my soup, the spoon should be deep and with proper proportions to keep the perfect balance, so I need to do less deeps in order to finish my bowl and spill less soup doing so(and yes, I prefer eating liquid food from bowls and not plates because it helps to maintain the temperature, lets grab it more efficiently and spill less if accidentally moving the bowl or the table) - which is quite important taking to consideration the usual autistic dyspraxia. It also has to be right to touch(not rough), without sharp edges. I hate too small or too shallow spoons for soup because using those means I would get tired of the process of eating way before I finish it.

On the other hand, for all the yoghurts and other packed desserts I find even a teaspoon to be too big, so I buy coffee spoons, and I use them for eating everything that comes in those small plastic/foil containers - because it’s just the right size in proportion and because it’s easier to reach each corner.

But, for the desserts that come in a glass, I have cocktail spoons, because there should always be a certain distance between my hand on the spoon and the glass, and it should be able to reach to the bottom and not sink inside.

Any spoon should, of course, have a right balance, touch, shape and edges.

Though, all of these things with a spoon are nothing compared to the forks!
My family ridicules me for my quest for finding The Right Fork.
The fork should not just be correctly balanced, nice to touch and with smooth edges, oh no, for a fork what’s actually important is the teeth! They should be long, but not too broad and not too narrow, not too thick and not too thin, and spaced correctly, and with sharp enough tips, but not sides, rather roundish than flat, and just curved at a right angle so my wrist doesn’t go in an uncomfortable position whether I’m trying to pick something or to hold something while cutting. Ah, and the side should be just right to be able to cut my food, but not my mouth. And, of course, almost everything that’s not liquid gets eaten by the fork.

Ah, and also I have fruit forks. Those tiny ones. Because I have a habit of making a fruit plate daily(cut a few fruits in thin slices), and eating them with a fruit fork allows me to not have juicy hands afterwards :). These have to be as little as possible without making my fingers tough the food, and also sharp enough.

So nooo, I don’t relate to ‘always chose the smallest spoon’, but can’t say I don’t care about the cutlery either

@actuallyautistic

CarolynStirling , 6 days ago

@alicemcalicepants @olena @actuallyautistic I always eat yoghurt and desserts with a small spoon.

punishmenthurts , 14 days ago to actuallyautistic

So when I thought there was one Human Nature, we all supposedly shared the upsides and the downsides, that was one thing, but having to parse Human Nature for Neurotype, and realizing that many common downsides are not universal, and not mine, suddenly it’s less just the sad “way it is,” and more an actual problem somebody needs to bloody deal with, these downsides.
.
#NeuroDiversity
#AutisticScience
#ActuallyAutistic
@actuallyautistic

CarolynStirling , 14 days ago

@punishmenthurts @actuallyautistic @moz @VulcanTourist Honesty and rule keeping. My siblings used to call me Goody Two shoes. My high school got a terrible shock when the first of my siblings arrived. “ you’re nothing like your sister” they said to the first arrival. By number 5 they were saying “ Oh no not another —————!”

autism101 , 1 month ago to actuallyautistic

Are you accident prone?

I seem to always have at least one toe that is currently injured from me banging it into a piece of furniture.

#AskingAutistics #ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic

photo: @tahreemkhann

CarolynStirling , 1 month ago

@Aerliss @autism101 @actuallyautistic @littlescraps I grew out of colliding with furniture as I slowed down with age. I used to be covered in bruises on my legs from colliding with desks in our large open plan offices. I was always in a hurry.

ChrisMayLA6 , 2 months ago to bookstodon

Librarians are (social) heroes; stepping up when other social services have fallen away, to help those with few other places to go...

No wonder the Right wants to defund the libraries (via attrition against local authorities), when you look at the pragmatic but vital social support they are offering to the vulnerable & isolated.

[this is a long read but worth it]

#Libraries #inequality
@bookstodon

https://www.theguardian.com/news/article/2024/jun/25/how-britains-libraries-provide-more-than-books

CarolynStirling , 2 months ago

@bookstodon @ChrisMayLA6 It’s the same in New Zealand. Libraries are attached to Community Centres in my City and Staff work in both. People from all walks of life come to get help with all sorts of issues. There are Classes for babies and Pre Schoolers. School Holiday Programs and more.It’s much more than just issuing books.

chevalier26 , 2 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic #actuallyautistic Do any of y'all have EXTREME heat intolerance? It's like the older I get the more I can't put up with hot weather. I've always been very "hot-natured," prefer winter over summer, etc. but this year I think my intolerance has been the worst yet. Friends are telling me how it's peak summer weather (90 degrees is comfortable?!?) meanwhile I start sweating when it's 70+ degrees Fahrenheit outside. What gives?

CarolynStirling , 2 months ago

@chevalier26 @actuallyautistic @aevole Tolerance depends a lot on humidity levels as you get older. 99% humidity is brutal at 75F.

olena , 3 months ago to actuallyautistic

Just was ‘diagnosed’ with anxiety today after talking to a psychiatrist for five minutes (I’m using quotes because it seems a bit too preliminary to me to diagnose whoever with whatever after about 5 minutes of general talk).
Came asking for #ADHD and #autism evaluation. Was totally ignored on that regard) Of course, didn’t have courage to ask again.

Was it so obvious? Was I just a walking stereotype: middle-aged woman from a war-thorn country living alone who voluntarily came to a psychiatrist(doesn’t matter what else she has, she can’t NOT be anxious)?
Or is it just a general experience of most of #AuDHD female-passing folks: to be seen as anxious, to have most of their symptoms attributed to #anxiety (not like I was asked about any symptoms, but maybe have demonstrated some?)?

@actuallyautistic

CarolynStirling , 3 months ago

@olena @actuallyautistic Autism and Anxiety go hand in hand.

CarolynStirling , 3 months ago

@Uair @cy @heartofcoyote @olena @actuallyautistic you’re wrong. My doctor had terrible trouble weaning women hooked on them when they were handed out like sweets to women in the sixties and seventies. My cousin was on huge dosage. I don’t know if she’s ever got off them. She’s like a zombie even now all these years later. Suspect she can’t be weaned off them. Doctors in my Country are very careful how they prescribe.

Uair , 4 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic

How are you with animals?

I tend to throw off the wrong vibe for people, but get along with even the iffy animals. Dogs that don't like most people warm to me.

Just wondering how much of that is autism and how much me. My dad hates animals.

CarolynStirling , 4 months ago

@actuallyautistic @EVDHmn @Uair I have had the same experience. Animals trust me. They have from my babyhood. I had a kitten as a 15 month old and my mother said she never had to correct me in my handling of my kitten. I attract animals even horses which I admit I’m scared of.

anomalon , 7 months ago to actuallyautistic

I just came across this image in my folders and it still cracks me up.
"Mommy, what is pathologization?"

@ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic #hyperlexia

CarolynStirling , 6 months ago

@anomalon @ActuallyAutistic @Vincarsi @actuallyautistic I was not quite four when I learned to read. I used to sit next to the boy next door while he did his reading homework. I even read cereal boxes at the breakfast table.

poloniousmonk , 9 months ago to actuallyautistic

@autisticadvocacy @actuallyautistic

Was anyone else misdiagnosed bipolar2? Rapid cycling?

I've long suspected that rapid cycling bipolar doesn't exist. Even before I figured out the autism part, I was a horrifically sleep deprived drunk--of course my emotions were a little loose.

CarolynStirling , 9 months ago

@actuallyautistic @poloniousmonk @autisticadvocacy @Selena Yes. A dearly loved family member has BP 2. They are alive because of ongoing good Mental Health Services. They accessed via the Private Health System. They have a full and happy life now. Therapy alongside meds is essential.

yourautisticlife , 11 months ago to actuallyautistic

@actuallyautistic

Here's another thing to add to my nightly ritual: nose strips.

I forgot about them because I think that (strangely enough) I did not use them last winter. I did search through my grocery receipts (they are electronic) and the last order I have for them is in 2021. So I think my memory is correct.

I tend to use them when the temperature turns colder. I restarted using them last night, and it made a difference in my sleep. I still woke up a bit early, but I slept very solidly prior to that.

I'm now wondering what the experience of other autistic people with these might be.

CarolynStirling , 11 months ago

@markusl @yourautisticlife @Jobob @actuallyautistic My stepfather had a tracheotomy for this reason. It was a drastic treatment for good reason. He did have surgery a few years later with no complications. The tracheotomy was closed up. He still needed a C Pap machine though.