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EarthShipTechIntern ,

Do they provide written material on ‘How to beat a dead horse’?

Maybe a dummies guide?

AeonFelis ,

Can they do an horse funeral on a Tuesday? It’s not clear from the text.

UpperBroccoli ,

Yes, they serve a double feature of rum and rosswurst.

aphonefriend ,

Come inside for a free consultation.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

If they bring a mariachi band I’m sold

Aceticon , (edited )

It would be especially appropriate for a horse funeral were the animal was used to bring contraband over the Sierra Morena or was called Cielito Lindo

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

I just want mariachi band to play Y Los Cielos on the other side of the door when I’m trying to squeeze out a really tough one, but that would be rude to them and those years are past.

lightnsfw ,

A catered quiet night alone sounds pretty dope actually.

dumbass ,
@dumbass@leminal.space avatar

Waiter comes up with a tray: pig in a blanket?

Me half stoned laying in bed: the fuck did you call me?

HonkTonkWoman ,

Another one comes around to gather your empty champagne glasses…

“This one’s still full, want me to leave it?”

“Nah, you can dump it. I wasn’t up for going to the toilet after being called a pig in a blanket…”

NaoPb ,

Catering companies would love to bring you food for 10 people and the plates to keep it warm for your quiet night alone. All you gotta do is pay.

AlligatorBlizzard ,

This just unlocked one of my weirdest childhood memories. I played fastpitch softball as a kid, and at one away game the school’s softball field was next to a pasture. During warmups and the first several innings, we watched a guy dig a hole in the pasture. In the second inning or so, we hear a gunshot off in the distance, and the third has a truck dragging a horse corpse to the big hole. The man shoved the horse corpse into the grave, and takes three innings to bury the horse.

At the team huddle after the game, one of my teammates said an eulogy for the horse.

WarmSoda ,

I think we’ve made some great progress today, don’t you? How does next Tuesday at 11 sound for our follow up.

HonkTonkWoman ,

That’s brutal…

I went to a middle school that sat next to a farm. A number of our athletic matches were canceled due to the cows getting out and one was canceled because the farmer shot a coyote on our baseball field & left it.

ClamDrinker ,

“You know you don’t need to bring a dead horse every time you want catering right, Jim?”

HonkTonkWoman ,

“Jim has returned! But this time he brought us a live horse…. you think he’s still going to ask us to cater its funeral?”

pigup ,

Horse funeral

Horse funeral 2

Horse funeral: truly aww-foal

Horse funeral: equinity

werefreeatlast ,

Like beating a dead horse.

Thcdenton ,

You both stop that shit right now

SeekPie ,

You’re saying they should stop horsing around?

Thcdenton ,

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/162d8c2c-d29c-4bc0-acf2-0b3cd5d2f098.gif

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Jim’s coming back?!

nailbar ,

They should have put that one above the second horse funeral.

qbus ,

Jim is the horse

captain_aggravated ,
@captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works avatar

It’s a Lemon Tango moment!

AnUnusualRelic ,
@AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world avatar

Jim had left?

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

He went out for cigarettes and never came back!

SnokenKeekaGuard ,
@SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Do you think they’d cater a horse funeral?

Zier ,
@Zier@fedia.io avatar

What??
NO!
Don't be silly. Where did you even get such a crazy idea?
Are you even serious right now???
I mean, I have no words...
A horse funeral, who even does that!

Hugh_Jeggs ,

Jim

teegus ,

Horse funerals are not a joke, Jim!

No_Change_Just_Money ,

Wait, what?

Jim is back in town?

Roll up all barrels from the cellar. Today, we feast and drink!

Zier ,
@Zier@fedia.io avatar

JIM?!??
Oh I have had enough of Jim. What an utter, complete...
Wait. Which Jim are we talking about? It's not Jim with the big D is it?
BRB

Norgur ,
@Norgur@fedia.io avatar

They do horse funerals and horse funerals, but I doubt they'd to horse funerals.

IkarusHagen2 ,

They only do anniversaryies of horse funerals

BudgetBandit ,

Only T U E S D A Y S

lowleveldata ,

Only for the first and second year

MissJinx ,
@MissJinx@lemmy.world avatar

Bye bye lil sebastian

NaoPb ,

Where is the catering in this thread?

dogsoahC ,

We really should start celebrating T u e s d a y s.

Num10ck ,

Tuesdays are the most productive day of the week. Not a time for celebration, its business time.

dogsoahC ,

All the more reason to reduce productivity. Flatten the curve, lower expectations. Tuesday is the scab of weekdays. The other days need to strike.

5714 ,

German Tuesday (Dienstag) roughly translates as duty-day (Dienst-Tag), probably not etymologically, but still.

dogsoahC ,

Etymologically, it derives in some way from the Norse-Germanic war god Tyr (akin to French “mardi”, “day of mars”, ig).

5714 ,

Ah yes, the war day. I wonder how many wars started on a Tuesday?

VonReposti ,

I know that World War I started on a Tuesday so that’s 50% of all world wars right there.

psychonova ,

could we celebrate wednesdays instead? tuesdays are my weekly catered drug intervention with my mother.

Routhinator ,
@Routhinator@startrek.website avatar

Throw a dead horse into the mix and we have a party.

billwashere ,

You really can’t beat a dead horse as a reason for a party.

afraid_of_zombies ,

It wasn’t Tuesday it was T u e s d a y. I am assuming it’s like a normal Tuesday but in some uncanny valley creepy form.

psychonova ,

my bad! on T u e s d a ys i’m actually totally free so

NikkiDimes ,

I heard that line in Bill Wurtz voice for some reason

flicker ,

Truly the voice of several generations.

Excrubulent ,
@Excrubulent@slrpnk.net avatar

That comment is basically a whole Bill Wurtz song.

Tja ,

Bye… Bye… 🎶 Lil’ Sebastian… 🎶

CuttingBoard ,

I miss him in the saddest fashion.

lugal ,

Jim is back? Why didn’t anybody tell me? Is he doing fine?

marble ,

Jim the horse? I’m afraid I have bad news for you.

mrgreyeyes ,

The horse his name is Jim

hungryphrog ,

Just after his wedding… :(

hungryphrog ,

Finally, someone to cater my horse wedding with drugs on a quiet Tuesday night!

ssj2marx ,

holds up spork

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