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partmussels , in What a Hobby

I have too much time.

Allright, we’ve got Hedge Sparrow, African Collared Dove, Blackbird, Redbreast, Eurasian Chaffinch, Blue Tit, Black Crow, Herring Gull, Great Tit, Starling, Wood Pigeon, Brown Rock Warbler, Sparrow

Etterra , in Fuck the law

My fiancee: that hat is too big for her head.

Me: did you even read the caption?

ObviouslyNotBanana OP ,
@ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world avatar

It’s obviously too small for two rotisserie chickens

Raxiel ,

Could fit more than a couple of roast quail though

HonkTonkWoman ,

How many roast quails can fit in a rotisserie chicken?

I think we’re still selling ourselves short here!

dQw4w9WgXcQ ,

If she didn’t bring a rotisserie chicken, that hat is definitely too big. But if she thought of bringing one, her brain is so large that it wouldn’t leave any room for the chicken.

That hat is a real Catch 22.

pjwestin , in Fuck the law
@pjwestin@lemmy.world avatar
IndiBrony , in Fortifications for residences of the little creatures that live on the head
@IndiBrony@lemmy.world avatar

Barbarian encampment discovered.

norimee , in Fuck the law

Fuck the law

There is no law about any kind of chicken in cinemas. They can’t even arrest you, when you bring your pet chicken.

ObviouslyNotBanana OP ,
@ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world avatar

If only that were true for every country on this earth

norimee ,

I doubt there is actually a country that has a law about it. That cinemas don’t allow it, doesn’t mean there is a law.

My sister doesn’t allow people to wear shoes in her living room. Doesn’t mean there is a law against shoes in living rooms and you will be arrested for wearing shoes.

You are welcome to prove me wrong and provide a source for your claim.

LifeInMultipleChoice , (edited )

I’m not sure where your sister lives, but I don’t think she’s not going to call the police if I walked into her living room with my shoes on. They’d probably get me for trespassing or breaking and entering. /S

I know what you mean about the sneaking food into theaters. They’d just ask you to throw it away /put it in your car / or just leave. Source: first job was a theater. Now if you refused, it would likely be an officer that throws you out on a Friday/Saturday as they hired off duty officers to be around those nights for security purposes. Used to keep the K9 for the K9 units in the birthday room because we felt bad they would leave them in the running car all night in Central Florida. Surprised a few employees when they went to grab something and were startled by a happy go lucky Shepherd/Malamute.

They were very on or off duty dogs. In the car, work mode, and ready to go to war. In the birthday party room, you better be ready for pets and snuggles.

ObviouslyNotBanana OP ,
@ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world avatar

Man I thought we were shitposting

Snowclone ,

A business can forbid outside food, it’s not a rare choice, they are a private business and can remove people based on their actions. Then again, I’ve never once seen a theater try or care.

Kazumara ,

Yes, sure, but norimee is right, they can’t arrest you. If they do arrest you for it, it’s false improsinment and they’ll get arrested instead.

GladiusB ,
@GladiusB@lemmy.world avatar

That is not how any of that works. They would call the police to remove them. They would then determine if they do pose a threat and then maybe detain them on a psychological hold. Even if all that does happen, it has to go to a judge with a charge after it’s examined by the DA. Then maybe false imprisoned. But it seems a bit far fetched for the situation.

Kazumara , (edited )

I’m not sure we’re thinking of the same hypothetical here…

I’m saying if you bring chicken to the cinema, and the staff (citizens) arrest you for it, they are beyond wrong. Because it’s oviously not illegal to bring chicken to the cinema, only against policy and therefore it would be false imprisonment.

All they can really do is ask you to leave, and if you don’t they can call the police, or maybe, depending on the law in that jurisdiction, they could then legally detain you for said trespassing. But certainly not for breaking their policy in the first place.

CaptainSpaceman , in Farting

Only flatulence novices believe all Deadlies must be Silent.

Truly, the quality of the stink factor is congruent to the proximity of the fecal matter to the anus.

Kiefciman OP ,

But what if the quality and composition of the fecale matter is shittier than shit? Then the fart quality would be compromised

Nutteman ,
@Nutteman@lemmy.world avatar

The “fecale” spelling is way funnier than it has any right to be.

iegod , in We need this level of energy. All the time...

Meh. Space spending is never bad.

mutilated_sphincter , in Farting
Kiefciman OP ,

How can a man fart at will? Wont he run out of gases eventually? Or swallowing air does the trick? Also now I aapire to become a professional fartist too

Speculater ,
@Speculater@lemmy.world avatar

Probably gets an air enema beforehand.

brlemworld ,

Lots of anal sex will make you bqueef

Kiefciman OP ,

no homo

Speculater ,
@Speculater@lemmy.world avatar

You left out the best part:

“While serving in the army, he told his fellow soldiers about his special ability, and repeated it for their amusement, sucking up water from a pan into his rectum and then projecting it up to several yards.”

Kiefciman OP ,

I shall train hard to achieve this power

sxan ,
@sxan@midwest.social avatar

Few abilities will protect you from muggings as the ability to squirt substances from your ass on demand.

EmoDuck , in the truth

Spaghetti > Meatball

Somethingcheezie , in the truth

Could be true. Science destroys religion…

SlopppyEngineer , in Fortifications for residences of the little creatures that live on the head

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/51408384-8c48-41ca-a148-0f0a28481f7f.png

“The year is 50 B.C. Gaul is entirely occupied by the Romans. Well not entirely! One small village of indomitable Gauls still holds out against the invaders."

Sorry, first thing this reminded me of.

undergroundoverground , in the truth

After blast off, the static T forms a new a new acronym of evil with the infamous L, G and B.

Wake up sheeple.

tetranomos , in Did it hurt?
@tetranomos@awful.systems avatar

algorithms of oppression. noble.

Bluefalcon , in Did it hurt?

“I googled who was the captain in titanic? Google said " Eat 1 smooth rock a day for better results.” So you were wrong.

boatsnhos931 , in Facts

Crazy love that

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