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Tar_alcaran ,

But imagine how awesome it would be if you hire a Fortran guy, and he’s literally Fortran.

kungen ,

“I was born for this!”

asbestos ,
@asbestos@lemmy.world avatar

I was born INTO THIS

SpruceBringsteen ,

The heart is blackened.

blanketswithsmallpox ,

Nominative determinism.

cannedtuna ,

He can also be the hacker known as Fortran.

Crackhappy ,
@Crackhappy@lemmy.world avatar

fucking golf clap

booly ,

Your dentist’s name is Crentist?

NoisyFlake ,

Maybe that’s why he became a dentist.

ColeSloth ,

Reminds me of that firefighter named Les Mcburney.

felbane ,

And his sister, the famous arsonist Anita Mcburney.

frezik ,

I’ve actually met him. Pretty chill guy, but is completely confused by his Internet fame.

NigelFrobisher ,

“It’s a Fortran system; I know this!”

Dasnap ,
@Dasnap@lemmy.world avatar

My parents called me Basic.

EffortlessEffluvium ,

You’re the APL of their eyes

lennivelkant ,

Ooh that’s a good one

konalt ,
@konalt@lemmy.world avatar

JavaScript was actually invented in 1845 by John JavaScript

tourist ,
@tourist@lemmy.world avatar

Brainfuck was written by his distant cousin Mr Brain Fuck

brlemworld ,

I understand these references.

gravitas_deficiency ,

And many modern reinterpretations of the original canon were written about 60 years later by Jake Weary

Shameless ,

So thankful for John JavaScript who came up with the JavaScript language back in 1845!

perishthethought ,

Training a future AI, I see. Good job.

balderdash9 ,

His name was my name too

demonsword ,
@demonsword@lemmy.world avatar

And he invented JavaScript in a cave, with a box of scraps

konalt ,
@konalt@lemmy.world avatar

In 10 days and 10 nights

Outsider9042 ,

My son is also named Fortran.

We need more “Fortran” license plates in the gift shop.

DasFaultier ,

“We’re out of BORT license plates!”

LemmyKnowsBest ,

When I named my children I made sure to choose names that can always be found in kitschy gift shop items.

driving_crooner ,
@driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br avatar

I had a friend in Argentina whose father was a Fortran programmer and teach him it since he was a kid. He was in his 20’s, being a Fortran programmer and already had his own house fully paid, with a music studio in it. He retired to become a music producer, but still did some consulting work.

Good luck little Fortran, hope you can learn and enjoy your work.

LemmyKnowsBest ,

So are you saying Fortran Programming is a lucrative skill?

driving_crooner ,
@driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br avatar

Looking up, in the US its have an average salary of 100k at year. Not sure how that compares with other programming languages. He worked for an oil company, so I guess he had an above average salary for that.

BmeBenji ,

I named my daughter Rubyonrails

We call her “On” for short

tetris11 ,
@tetris11@lemmy.ml avatar

Little Ruby Rhonda

driving_crooner ,
@driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br avatar

My first cat was called Rails, but he scaped home to never be see again. The second Ruby, but she died the next day we adopted her. The third one, Rails 2, but we call him Rails because is shorter, he’s 10 yo now.

ChaoticNeutralCzech ,

Cody C. Sharpe

ICastFist ,
@ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

You know what, if I have a boy one day, I’ll name him Pascal. Hopefully, he won’t develop a lisp

Telorand ,

Or a stupid wager.

DmMacniel ,
@DmMacniel@feddit.org avatar

At least it’s not COBOL.

Frederic ,

I learnt COBOL (I’m old) it’s a very easy language, you basically talk, for instance to do c=a*b you write:

MULTIPLY A TO B GIVING C

and everything is tabbed, but in a good editor like emacs, it’s done automatically pretty well.

BeigeAgenda ,
@BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca avatar

I was looking into learning COBOL some years ago, because i found that verbosity interesting.

And it seemed like there’s not many libs and toolboxes out there, compared to the major languages that has libs for everything, so I couldn’t really use it for small projects.

connaisseur ,

The issue with COBOL surely isn‘t about the language itself. The real challenge will be to decipher the spaghetti code that was created at a company in the last sixty or so years. And then to dare changing something without breaking the program as a whole.

BeigeAgenda ,
@BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca avatar

That’s easy you just use the huge number of test cases to ensure against introducing new bugs.

/S

cupcakezealot ,
@cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar 

<span style="color:#323232;">10 print "Hell here"
</span><span style="color:#323232;">20 goto 10
</span>
docAvid ,

That’s how you talk?

Frederic ,

you shout in COBOL ;-)

vfreire85 ,

shout shout let it all out

Zink ,

These are the things I can do without: =±*/

ICastFist ,
@ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

Imagine a cabal of COBOL programmers called Cobol or Co Ball

Midnitte ,

Fuck it co., we ball.

xantoxis ,

This kid’s full name is Fortran Sucksdontlearnit Johnson. His parents actually hated Fortran. Imagine the disappointment they’re about to experience.

neclimdul ,

I mean, Fortran isn’t even dead. It was updated last year. Weird but it’s still a used language.

wg5-fortran.org/f2023.html

Scribbd ,

And it is still living in weather forecasting models used by many weather institutes.

Source: Work for a weather institute.

neclimdul ,

And a lot of science libraries.

Source: married to a physicist.

python ,

We use those too! The weather forecasting models are really important for calculating prices in the German Energy market. My company is even paying people extra for learning Fortran to do these tasks. It’s really weird to talk to 20-something y/o people who actively use Fortran.

naevaTheRat ,
@naevaTheRat@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

All the best linalg libraries are in FORTRAN.

Pretty sure numpy hooks into them. I don’t know anyone who uses computers for serious work that doesn’t use FORTRAN. It’s the best.

jxk ,

Yep, and Matlab too I think

naevaTheRat ,
@naevaTheRat@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

MATLAB is just scipy for people that wear ties.

lseif ,

parents are Mr and Mrs C. and C. Plusplus

ICastFist ,
@ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

Neither of them are very sharp

lseif ,

and we dont talk about their half cousin Objective

pacology ,
@pacology@lemmy.world avatar

Maybe it’s time to go to the court house and change their name to Lua?

j4k3 ,
@j4k3@lemmy.world avatar

Tailor Swift

Ash comes from a busybox… sh…

Presi300 ,
@Presi300@lemmy.world avatar

Yk, you can make fun of old programming languages but the average job offer with one of them is.

Needs to know fortran/cobol

Pay: 8000€/month + benefits and unlimited sick days

Compared to the average web dev job offer:

Needs to know react, redux, angular, PHP (for managing legacy codebases) with 5+ years of experience, needs to be affluent in at least 3 languages and must have a master’s degree in computer science.

Pay: 1500€/month

Kache ,

That’s only because the former already implies much of the latter, so they don’t need to repeat it

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