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programmer_humor

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Blackmist , in Some of my iterations are delightfully recursive

As your compiler patiently turns it back into a loop.

intensely_human ,

mmyes

pearsaltchocolatebar , in I feel proud of myself to recognize that this iconic dude is not at a 'computer', rather, a [dumb] terminal! ]Or...?]

Not just confidently incorrect, but proudly incorrect.

scrubbles ,
@scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech avatar

And even if they were correct, what’s the big deal? I spend half my life ssh’d into other machines, it means nothing what they’re sitting in front of

uservoid1 , in The perfect commit message

Keeping the chicken in the oven could lead to nasty bugs

Patches ,

That’s not true. Chickens are fantastic at getting rid of bugs.

Got a tick problem? Not anymore.

However you will now have rodent problems and require something to take care of that: Terriers are great at that. So are cats.

bort ,

However you will now have rodent problems

chicken got you covered on that front too www.youtube.com/watch?v=iubf1oJdQQQ

Patches ,

Will they eat the rodents? Yes. They will eat anything. edible or not.

Will you still have a rodent problem? Yes you will.

Kolanaki ,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

…she swallowed the horse to catch the cow, she swallowed the cow to catch the goat, she swallowed the goat to catch the dog, she swallowed the dog to catch the cat, she swallowed the cat to catch the bird, she swallowed the bird to catch the spider (that wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her), she swallowed the spider to catch the fly. I don’t know why she swallowed the fly. Perhaps she’ll die. 🤷🏻‍♂️

gregorum ,

On a hole on bottom of the sea…

wreckedcarzz ,
@wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world avatar

For the first few words, I thought this was going a very different direction

Anticorp , in I feel proud of myself to recognize that this iconic dude is not at a 'computer', rather, a [dumb] terminal! ]Or...?]

Except the computer is right there in the picture, it’s what the monitor is sitting on top of.

northendtrooper , (edited ) in The perfect commit message

AI is going to replace my sheets, that should be changed once a week to maintain a high level of hygiene.

Tylerdurdon , in The perfect commit message

Just roll with it. Let’s see if anyone is even reading those.

fidodo ,

I write my commit messages for myself in the future so future me can figure out what the hell past me was thinking

CosmicTurtle0 , in The perfect commit message

I know that this isn’t the point but I absolutely can’t stand the word “juice” to describe meat drippings.

Juice is from a fruit! When I see juice to describe meat drippings, all I can think of is someone squeezing a big steak and squeezing all the “juice” out.

Anyway, commit message is on point. Add a small pinch of flour to thicken the “juice” and you’ll have gravy.

humorlessrepost ,

What would you prefer it be called? It’s not blood, despite common misconceptions.

cafeinux ,

“Meat flavoured water”

bdonvr ,

Meat-fluids

blandfordforever ,

Exudate

Maven OP ,
@Maven@lemmy.world avatar

Meat-tea

CosmicTurtle0 ,

Meat drippings.

Deceptichum ,
@Deceptichum@sh.itjust.works avatar

From Middle English jus, juis, from Old French jus, jous, from Latin jūs (“broth, soup, sauce”), from Proto-Indo-European *yúHs, from *yewH- (“to mix (of meal preparation)”).

Sounds like the right word to me.

You sound like one of those people who take issue with non-dairy milks being called milks too.

ryven ,
@ryven@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Is that bad? I love almond milk but I feel like it deserves its own word. :P

Deceptichum ,
@Deceptichum@sh.itjust.works avatar

Yes, it’s the rallying call of the dairy industry lobbyists trying to force ownership of a word and to hurt the sales of non-dairy milks.

Milk has referred to all manner of white thick drinking liquids for at least 800 years now, it is not solely the domain of animals.

towerful ,

Like man milk

orphiebaby ,

Jesus. Citation seriously needed.

orphiebaby ,

I agree, we need more words. We lose words all the time, too, due to assumptive abuse.

penquin , in The perfect commit message

Copilot do be high sometimes.

sum_yung_gai , in Some of my iterations are delightfully recursive

Immutable in order to protect against parallel code changing the size of the iterable?

Donkter ,

Immutable because the only lists worth iterating over are the ones I define for myself.

nnrx , in The perfect commit message

Press and hold firmly for 30 seconds

MrTHXcertified , in The perfect commit message

I’m getting GlaDOS vibes from this one.

Quill0 , in I feel proud of myself to recognize that this iconic dude is not at a 'computer', rather, a [dumb] terminal! ]Or...?]
@Quill0@lemmy.digitalfall.net avatar

He’s literally at an IBM PC/XT or clone

MehBlah , in What if we added a social component like "Stories" to this calculator app?

This is how smart shuffle was born on spotify. No one wants that useless shit.

TechNerdWizard42 , in Some of my iterations are delightfully recursive

Ah yes the X86 instruction set for mapping.

Everything is a conditional branch loop. Always has been.

Username ,

There also isn’t a loop instruction though.

TechNerdWizard42 ,

It’s a conditional branch… You make that into a loop. Branch if zero, branch if not zero, etc.

ValiantDust , in Unused variables

But are you gonna return something for this method??? You said you’d return an integer, yet there is no return statement!

gregorum ,

and it had better be an integer! it had better be an integer, motherfucker!!

porous_grey_matter ,

Well yea… If you write “return <object of some other type>” that is actually wrong, as opposed to just not having gotten around to filling it in yet

gregorum ,
sik0fewl ,

This is why I always write my methods from bottom to top. This way I’ve always got a return statement and I use my variables before they are even declared.

NightAuthor ,

For a second there I thought you might be serious

ShouldIHaveFun ,

I do actually use variables before I declare them most of the time. IDEs make it so easy to then generate the declaration with the correct type.

NightAuthor ,

That’s true, in fact I’ve started doing that myself. Same with methods, instead of going and writing the method and then coming back to use it, I’ll write the invocation first.

N0tTheBees ,
@N0tTheBees@sh.itjust.works avatar

Ah an avid dreambird user I see

bitcrafter ,

Spotted the INTERCAL programmer.

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