How many widgets have we transferred to acme this year?
Simple enough question right?
But then when you look at the data, each region works with acme’s local offices differently. Some transfer using one method, some offices mark the transfer in the system as “other firm”. Oh, and we don’t even get a data feed from the north west region because they still haven’t upgraded their shit so I can request a spreadsheet but it’s in a different format than everything else.
Then inevitably Acme has a different number of widgets that have been transfered. Because if a transfer gets kicked back or cancelled, it’s easier to just create a new transfer rather than go fix an old one because that process is laborious and requires tons of approvals so they just create a new transfer and send it over.
But yea, 20 minutes should be enough time to get you that before your meeting with Acme.
Because Jen in accounting doesn’t believe in it, and Tom the CIO likes his data stored raw in TXT Amphibious Delineated. Then our biggest client prefers data as Jason so we swapped half of our database to that to speed things up.
But the real problem is high turnover because we don’t pay anyone enough to work on things they are proud of. After 2 years we stop doing even 3% COL raises so they go elsewhere. So every 2-4 years each position gets a new opinionated asshole.
our biggest client prefers data as Jason so we swapped half of our database to that
the app I work with currently stores json as the only column in a sql table and it hurts me so very much. like watching someone pick up a screwdriver and try to bash a nail in with the handle.
Nah this is one of those slick work deals, legit all you need to do is list all your entries, order a pivot table, and then you can just arrange your variables to display however you want them to, do a little format pizaz, and voila, here’s that “report” you asked for!
Me this morning. I’m gonna take a look at why this Jenkins pipeline is failing. This one job starts a dozen others. Half are failing. For different reasons. After starting rewriting a job that someone half assed. Realize the original error was caused by missing input but some are still valid. Still can’t figure out why my rewritten program is erroring. Get pulled away because another program did something weird… I completed nothing today but worked a ton.
You wanna know why this dashboard takes a full minute to load? It’s because it joins every table in the fucking database because some people can’t be bothered to look at a separate page for certain information.
Basic rule if someone claims X magically solves a problem they don't follow X and are a huge generator of the problem.
For example people who claim they don't need to write comments because they write self documenting code are the people that use variable names x1,x2,y, etc..
Similarly anyone you meet claiming Test Driven Development means they have better tests will write code with appalling code coverage and epically bad tests.
Me right now, discovering that our archives data have file sizes… sometimes in bytes, sometimes in kilobytes. I found some pattern this morning thinking I could know which was which, then the pattern collapsed at some date in the past.
Joy.
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