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Agent641 ,

We dont talk about the mythical fourth toot.

caboose2006 ,

I literally laughed so hard I cried.

coaxil ,

I laughed so hard I legit farted.

Malfeasant ,

Fight fire with fire.

xia ,

Toot-o-meter.

DempstersBox ,

Test toot!

milicent_bystandr ,

Ah really?! I can smell it from here!

AFKBRBChocolate ,

I had a female employee come to me to complain years ago. She had had a disagreement with an older male employee (thankfully not mine) some weeks prior, and since then, every time he walked by her cube, he’d pause at her doorway, fart, and then keep walking without saying anything.

She at least was aware of how absolutely ridiculous it was, but legitimately didn’t think it was something she should have to deal with. One of the stranger management issues.

DragonTypeWyvern ,

Pretty textbook workplace harassment but I’m not sure how you’d prove it. Tape him with a clearly displayed fart face? Be sure to label one of stills with a red circle and a line saying “fart face”

AFKBRBChocolate ,

She wasn’t interested in suing, she just wanted him to stop farting in her doorway. I didn’t know the guy, so I started by talking to his manager, who talked to the guy. Sounds like he initially tried to deny it, but in a way that made it clear he was doing it on purpose. His boss was pretty clear that it wouldn’t be tolerated and it never happened again.

Some people are so weird and petty.

HexesofVexes ,

Well, next time I need to fart while lecturing I know what I’m doing…

GluWu ,

While at your desk make direct and sustained eye contact in silence. Once you know you have him gently say “poop poop” then violently shit yourself. Everything is about shitting, except shitting. Shitting is about power.

wreckedcarzz ,
@wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world avatar

this whole thread, I’m crying

AidsKitty ,

Keep your distance?

Olhonestjim ,

Record the farts. Sample the audio. Create music.

cammoblammo ,

The copyright issues could be interesting.

Agent641 ,

Theres a band called the Toot Toot Toots:

youtu.be/0_pqvod-xOw?si=Xqwk2g1nVMbDSkhP

Personally, i think this song and music video slaps

Coskii ,
@Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

I’d honestly ask them if they’d seen a doctor about that. No one should be that gassy on a regular basis.

Unbecredible ,

All I do is fart. Except during the times when I’m holding in my farts so I can keep living among society. But even then I’m just quietly belching under my breath. All I am is gas. Held together in the loose shape of a man by the surface tension in a bubble of cheeseburger grease and the force of my will to eat another. Just one more. My urine is carbonated.

.

TheReturnOfPEB ,

record it ?

nawordar ,

I learned to dab while sneezing back when the meme wasn’t dead yet. I got so used to it, that I do that to this day. At least my palms are clean

BigPotato ,

I learned to sneeze like that long before dabbing was a thing and it wasn’t until someone commented that I just dabbed on them that it connected those dots.

Regardless, I still sneeze in my elbow.

EnderMB ,

Haha, I thought I was the only one!

I started doing it to annoy my wife, but now I still do it, and it’s taking considerable concentration to not dab when I sneeze.

NutWrench ,
@NutWrench@lemmy.ml avatar

Three toots is enemy action.

Clbull ,

It almost makes me want to take laxatives, go “TOOT TOOT TOOT TOOT”, then shit on the floor to assert dominance.

Empricorn ,

Just almost??

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