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lemmyshitpost

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niktemadur , in Lemmy feels so much more welcoming than R*ddit... And it's weird

Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries.

Hogger85b ,

Your mother's on xhamster and father's phone a Blackberry™

Rootiest ,

Your mother’s on the Instagram and your father is a Hexbear

TruTollTroll ,
@TruTollTroll@lemmy.world avatar

What a strange person… is there anyone else we could talk too?? I am King, ya know!

burgersc12 ,

Are you saying his mom’s a whore and his dad’s a drunk?

Cabrio ,

A cheap drunk at that.

theodewere , in Who knew 1989 was an uneventful year in China
@theodewere@kbin.social avatar

man if the CCP catches you, just hope you have some condition that makes your organs undesirable.. at least that way you can starve in the mines for however long you hold out, instead of going straight to the organ farm..

SnowdenHeroOfOurTime ,

BuT aMeRiCa iS iDeNtIcAl

GBU_28 ,

Just tell em you recently had Fukushima fish lol

hark ,
@hark@lemmy.world avatar

Also I heard they eat babies.

KingJalopy , in No long hair!

I wonder why boys in a Catholic school can’t have long hair like a girl? It’s not like it would make them look more like a girl would it? And even if it did make them look more girlish, how would that affect anybody at the Catholic school? It’s not like Catholics are known for nefarious things…

Chalky_Pockets ,

I take pretty much every opportunity to shit on the rosary rattler cult, but this is the first I’ve heard of this particular rule, I’m pretty sure it’s just some Catholic schools. And surely “Jesus had long hair” came up often.

XiELEd ,
@XiELEd@lemmy.world avatar

The rule is quite prevalent in the Philippines

Black_Gulaman ,
@Black_Gulaman@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Female Skirts should be 2 inches below the knee. No crumpled socks.

No makeup, no nail polish. No flamboyant artificial hair color.

noseatbelt ,

Yeah my Catholic school allowed everyone to have whatever hairstyle they wanted. Hair dye, piercings, and tattoos were also allowed. Actually, not sure about the tattoos but I definitely had friends who had them and they weren’t expelled or anything.

Tehgingey ,

Listen man, the priests like what they like. Don’t kink shame.

KingJalopy ,

True. Judge not lest ye be judged and whatnot. Mb.

TokenBoomer ,

Lol 😂

bob_wiley ,
@bob_wiley@lemmy.world avatar

They don’t want any of the girls to mistake one of the boys for Jesus and accidentally sin trying to do his will.

Reva ,

“Conservatives and homophobes are actually gay” is a bad punchline. What’s the joke - that being gay is emasculating, humiliating or perverted?

KingJalopy ,

I’m Talking about pedophile church leaders dude lol WTF

Swedneck ,
@Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

It’s just a way to control people and instill the idea that being controlled is fine and good

zakobjoa , in Fascinating
@zakobjoa@lemmy.world avatar

No feathers and two pedals? That’s clearly a bicycle.

MargotRobbie , in Uno reverse 🔁
@MargotRobbie@lemmy.world avatar

… And all of this could have been avoided if he just renamed it “Twitter by X”, so make Twitter part of the X super-app that he wanted to build.

asexualchangeling ,

Then he would have been accused of following in the footsteps of zuck with “meta” and I don’t think his insanely fragile ego would survive

rayneokay , in Seal break and enter

The seal in question, news coverage and interview (with the humans, not the seal)

PipedLinkBot ,

Here is an alternative Piped link(s): piped.video/watch?v=t2fiYLnrMrs

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.

crossal ,
@crossal@lemmy.world avatar

Videos are not loading for me on mobile

Chariotwheel ,

Aww, it's adorable!

FlyingSquid ,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Wait, he took pictures of that seal but didn’t name it and keep it forever and cuddle it while he slept?!

AccurstDemon , in Anon meets a girl
@AccurstDemon@sopuli.xyz avatar

Just here to say, fuck this long image

Psythik , (edited )

OP is insane if they think that anyone wants to actually read a fucking 500 page novel written by some random dickhead from 4chan. Ain’t happening.

tabularasa ,

Shame. It’s a wonderful story. I think you could take the 5 minutes to read it.

Psythik ,

Then please give me the Sparknotes summary. I have ADHD; I can’t focus long enough to read this entire thing regardless, even if I wanted to.

AcesFullOfKings ,

Sounds like a you problem. If that’s true then you don’t have to be dickish about it in the comments. Just bc you don’t want to spend 6 mins reading a nice story doesn’t mean nobody else does.

Thoth19 ,

Guy is depressed. Meets blind girl. Goes on dates with her. They are cute together and get married. Happily ever after.

alertsleeper ,

read it in a couple minutes, totally worth it after seeing 50 Trump-mugshot memes

SpaceNoodle , in nobody knows how it feels

Left-handed women: straight to the sanitorium

Ghyste , in I miss 2011 memes

Cropping is hard, huh?

CluckN ,

Needed to crop out the iFunny watermark

Ghyste ,

Fair enough, I wasn’t really serious either.

candyman337 , in go king

That’s a young guy with a filter, old people bodies don’t look like that lol

Wild_Mastic , in Wait until you see the sequel!

New film just dropped

Coki91 , (edited )
@Coki91@dormi.zone avatar

Actual Sequel

pornhubfan ,

Call the extraterrestrial!

name_NULL111653 ,

Went to Mars, never came back…

DunkBeast ,

Dang it you anarchist, stop leaking everywhere! ( I miss r/anarchychess 😢)

Gurfaild ,

google en !AnarchyChess

Klear ,

Holy fediverse!

zarquon , in engineers gotta get their money up

As I learned in engineering school…

“Any idiot can build a bridge which doesn’t fall down. It takes an engineer to build a bridge which bearly doesn’t fall down”

GeoGio7 , in Really Tired of Subscriptions

I disagree, tax is the price you pay for living in a civilization. It pays for infrastructure, social security and more.

Whether the country actually uses it well is another story.

CaptPretentious ,

How is that any different than a subscription fee?

Be it some MMORPG or streaming service… it’s still a large number of people putting in money for infrastructure and services and often end up with money being misappropriated against what the people want and someone somewhere making bank off it. Look at all the cancelled shows on Netflix that people loved, or shows that were given the greenlight where people are like ‘what the actual fuck’ (like that one pedo show)… and then flaunt money to piss of other people like with the writers strike and Netflix posting a 900K a year for some AI developer…

ButtholeSpiders OP ,
@ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website avatar

Taxes were the example of how to leech on the people under the guise of a protection racket. They knew with subscriptions what they were upon creation, a racket without the promise of protection. It’s getting bled by a third party, and now it’s multiple parties all hoping you’ll forget they’re slowly milking you too.

kescusay , in I do not wish to live in the Gummy Universe.
@kescusay@lemmy.world avatar

So, here’s the deal… We’ve all been spelling it wrong for this entire time.

In the Gummyverse, the bears really are bear-sized. They’re legit. You wouldn’t want to fight one, no matter how squishy they look. They’re apex in their domains.

But…

What we have been mistakenly calling gummy “worms” are on another level entirely. They are mystic, ancient, and quite eldritch. If you find yourself in the Gummyverse, you do not want to run into these things. They’re not worms.

They’re wyrms.

cinda ,

you want to move around bouncing and jiggling as to not alert shai’gummud

MelastSB ,

May its passing feed the earth!

Gamey , in Dogs

Dear climate change, please just kill every single one of us humans!

Disgusted_Tadpole ,
@Disgusted_Tadpole@lemmy.ml avatar

proceeds to buy huge SUVs and makes them run h24

Gamey ,

I am poor af and got no drivers licence 😂

The_Mantis ,

Go burn some styrofoam. You’ll be doing your part in no time.

Gamey ,

I will just keep buying the cheapest crap food out there, if I survive that should add up too!

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