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lemmyshitpost

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salvaria , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

Android turtle emoji

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

Caaan yooou stooop fooor aaa miiinute tooo taaalk abooout ooour looord aaand saaavior Goooooogle Chriiist?

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/292bc5c5-0dcd-4883-a1fd-79cbd91acd05.jpeg

TOModera , in No, seriously, I want to know

That cow’s sick! Must be bird flu.

UxyIVrljPeRl , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

Chicken Wings!

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

You are insufferable, Ginger. Next thing you’d say is that tendies are made out of chicken too!

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/8fe48bfb-d393-4a6f-ae97-e50bc9ee281d.jpeg

Initially I thought about a chick being a WW2 pilot, an avian with metal wings making those doubting her amphibians, but chics from the Chicken Run movie arguing about enjoying food from KFC topped that without any challenge.

UxyIVrljPeRl ,

Well chickens eat egg shells

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

Didn’t know that. But since birth is that stressful and demanding, it makes sense to avoid any waste and bring it back into the system. Yet, imagining a woman snatching that umbical cord like it’s bacon is… uhm… something. Sometimes double standards are okay.

UxyIVrljPeRl ,

In Peru Chicken lay blue eggs. Thats also a double standard Im okay with.

Kolanaki , in Awww, he's so cuuuuttteeee!!
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

“What if robots could fuck and Wall-E and Eva had a child?” - Some Amazon engineer.

PenisWenisGenius , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

This is lemmy shitpost, so an ass taking a shit.

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

Could there be an Unabomber’s Manifesto if Ted was spoiled by a fiber optics internet connection? It doesn’t make any sense, sure, but thanks to WWW you’ve read it from a place I can only dream of visiting one day. I find it’s precious that we use unbelievable technological wonders for our daily diarrhea posting.

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/c9698850-b138-4209-a1fb-2744c94acb03.jpeg

kokesh , in "Hey Google, Turn my balls off"
@kokesh@lemmy.world avatar

Great! Someone should write HomeAssistant integration!

Gestrid ,

“Hey, Google, I’m having sex!”

Google turns down the lights and turns on the balls.

dQw4w9WgXcQ ,

The stereo starts playing Yakety Sax

iiGxC , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

Self portrait

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

My hairs are greasy AF right now. Hope that wouldn’t show up on the picture.

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/81c2a0c0-0552-46c1-a01f-6a1e2c4f7818.jpeg

Zapheus , in "Hey Google, Turn my balls off"

Controlled vasectomy…

Maven , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

A clown who is just doing this to pass the time

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar
nicknonya , in "Hey Google, Turn my balls off"
@nicknonya@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

i like how each tube has an individual switch. for when you only want some cum

finley ,

That’s not where cum comes from. Your testes only produce spermatozoa

Nommer ,

No that’s where the pee is stored.

Sidyctism2 ,

Its so you can decide if its gonna be a boy or a girl

Daxter101 ,

The breeding kink option

Cosmicomical , in False Dichotomy Rule

Ah yes, a pumpkin-earther

aggelalex , in Post a prompt, have an art from this insane russian

I wanna see the sea drowning in a man

spaghetti_hitchens ,

Maliciously drowning him or just indifferently?

aggelalex ,

I wanna see passion, an entire sea gasping for freedom in the existence and being of a human being, trying to avoid the jaws of death, while man is just indifferent to the sea’s pleas. Think the roles of a man and the sea, reversed.

andrew_bidlaw OP ,
@andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works avatar

When in the morning you are still having a lingering vision of you night’s dream while gargling in the bathroom.

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/8e7872d4-3bd2-4d82-9c86-7dc77584703a.jpeg

aggelalex ,

Amazing. Thank you.

solsangraal , in Awww, he's so cuuuuttteeee!!

to think about it, literally every tech company is going to hand over entire digital history to either the feds or whoever’s paying enough anything for it

drunkpostdisaster , in The worst pick-up line I've ever gotten

Not everyone follows what these people say on Twitter. Could be this guy had no idea the Rowling was the kind of person she is. Same is kind of true with jorden Patterson. On the surface nothing he says is unreasonable. It’s not until you really look into him that the problems emerge

Omgarm , in Borrowing a car

Very easy to find it when you need it.

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