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Linkerbaan ,
@Linkerbaan@lemmy.world avatar

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/c3fbfa7d-a85e-4569-86b9-c1bcfd382f29.jpeg

Heavybell ,
@Heavybell@lemmy.world avatar

“Mods, deactivate this man’s balls.”

Evil_Shrubbery ,

They just want your money, super glue works just as good and it’s cheaper, non-invasive.

MystikIncarnate ,

If this was controlled by your Google home, it would need a battery, which would need to be recharged. Imagine saying “hey Google, turn my balls off” and getting “I can’t reach that device” because you forgot to recharge your ball switch last night…

We’re living in the future

Evil_Shrubbery ,

We all know pee is stored in the balls.

So this is just a piss switch.
(Which would actually be a real issue solver for folk with incontinence issues.)

watersnipje ,

That exists. My great-aunt had one of these for her incontinence problems.

Evil_Shrubbery ,

Oh, for real, not just catheters with a valve either, proper internal semi-permanent valves/switches with magnets, some even gravity operated.

Thx for TILing me.

tiredofsametab ,

click

Before continuing, please accept the following terms and conditions.... [35 pages of legalese ensue]

SturgiesYrFase ,
@SturgiesYrFase@lemmy.ml avatar

Followed by 15mins of unsinkable ads

Daxter101 ,

uBlock Origin -Iceberg edition-

Wes4Humanity ,

“you’re subscription will expire in 3 days. Renew now to avoid testicular incineration.”

drathvedro ,

I don’t want a kill-switch. I want a turbo-button to slice metal sheets with a jet of cum.

Evil_Shrubbery ,

You need a button for that?

If you are experiencing pressure issues just mitigate the issue by adding acids (via special infection cultures in the balls) to the cum, or some abrasive materials (jagged kidney/bladder stones perhaps?).

i_ben_fine ,

is this one of them brandnewsentences?

crusty ,

That’s either a very small finger or a very large dick

Lesrid ,

For you

werefreeatlast ,

Like others, I don’t have a use for my balls anymore. It sure would be nice to keep them around looking good though. But anyway, could I please just get the euphoria stimulus! I don’t really care for all the gooey mess.

blahsay ,

This is an idea from a book by john scalzi called starter villain.

Paranomaly ,
@Paranomaly@sh.itjust.works avatar

Roses are red, this drink’s made from laudanum…

Kolanaki ,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

This is the real reason Data doesn’t tell everyone where his off switch is.

S_H_K ,

That’s some Chobits shit.

Holzkohlen ,

I’d just forget which one is on and which one is off. Also I have zero need for the on setting.

nicknonya ,
@nicknonya@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

i like how each tube has an individual switch. for when you only want some cum

finley ,

That’s not where cum comes from. Your testes only produce spermatozoa

Nommer ,

No that’s where the pee is stored.

Sidyctism2 ,

Its so you can decide if its gonna be a boy or a girl

Daxter101 ,

The breeding kink option

Zapheus ,

Controlled vasectomy…

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