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Etterra ,

The dude fucked a couch one time, that we heard about. You know it must be true since Jorkin Peanuts Vance denied it.

elbucho ,
@elbucho@lemmy.world avatar

Here’s a good write-up of it. It’s pretty hilarious.

seaQueue ,
@seaQueue@lemmy.world avatar

Dude is more satisfied by a couch than a woman, allegedly

davidagain , (edited )

It was definitely alleged that Vance had frequent sexual contact with a couch using a rubber glove to collect and dispose of the evidence, yes.

AP initially fact checked it as false, but had to retract the fact check because it broke their own rule that fact checks have to be known to be correct.

amio ,

Are you American? If no, then you are dreadfully fortunate enough to not have to deal with it. Every election year is a bunch of apes flinging shit and this is just another turd in flight.

But if you still want the rundown it is "HA HA MAN FUK COUCH LELELELELELELELELE" and apparently it isn't even true. Credible, though, I know.

Dave , (edited )
@Dave@lemmy.nz avatar

I’d suggest reading this: knowyourmeme.com/…/jd-vance-couch-cushion-story-h…

TL:DR Some Twitter user posted a made up story about JD Vance having sexual with a couch, “which led to news publications uncritically repeating the hoax story as fact.”

Kraiden ,

It's a bit more nuanced than that. Essentially AP fact checked it and instead of saying "Hillbilly Eulegy doesn't contain a story about Vance getting freaky with a couch" they used the headline "Vance never had relations with a couch"

That's not something anyone could actually know for sure though, and they were called on it... and had to retract it...

Which of course lead to people wondering why it was retracted, and it kinda snowballed. I don't think anybody seriously believes it, but as the story goes, there's no evidence he DIDN'T fuck a couch lol

jordanlund ,
@jordanlund@lemmy.world avatar

There was a fake story that he wrote about humping a couch in his book, Hillbilly Elegy.

It’s been completely debunked, but people still talk about it because it’s funny.

dwindling7373 ,

because they are stupid

Fixed that for you.

jewbacca117 ,

It’s because JD vance is a fucking weirdo. I didn’t like pushing false stories about people, but he’s just such a smarmy motherfucker it fits so well. He is a detestable person with detestable views.

dwindling7373 ,

No. It’s clearly a stupid thing to do. Being detached from the complex truth of things is 90% of the problem with mankind, as far as politics go. I thought there was substance behind these jokes but it’s all made up.

I’m sure there’s plenty of real things to underscore what a massive duche Trump VP is. Making things up about him, or anybody else, should be illegal (and it is) for good reasons.

harcesz ,
@harcesz@szmer.info avatar

So what up with Obama birth cert and the elections Biden stole?

dwindling7373 ,

I don’t know, you tell me. It looks like we are considering those fair game to gain the upper hand on our opposition…

EDIT: oh you meant the legality? Well, it’s America so the law doesn’t really apply the way one would expect.

Munkisquisher ,

It’s great to see what tiny issues resonate with their massive self doubt though, tiny hands or fucking couches

DarkThoughts ,

I thought there was substance behind these jokes

And you call others stupid... lol

dwindling7373 ,

I didn’t mean to generalyze. You are clearly stupid, since you can’t imagine a world where, I don’t know, Jordan Peterson has hidden in Russia to go on a drug induced coma to fix his drug addiction and there’s some tangential validity to one VP potential pansexual urges.

DarkThoughts ,

You are clearly stupid since you don't understand what a joke is, and since you don't know how to write the word "generalize".

MrScottyTay ,

It’s not at all that. It’s too reflect what the republicans have done for years now. But this story is funny and obviously fake so it’s even more funny when you can see it actually getting under the skin of vance and other republicans. That’s why it gets repeated so often. I understand this and I’m not even American.

dwindling7373 ,

To* reflect?

So it’s not that it’s wrong it was all about envying them and finally we can engage in the same behaviour too?

Ioughttamow ,

Glenn Beck raped and killed a girl in 1984. JD Vance raped and killed a couch in 2004. When will Americans wake up and stop them?

Irremarkable ,
@Irremarkable@fedia.io avatar

Someone's mad that Trump has lost the mandate of heaven (shitposters)

dwindling7373 ,

Trump never had a mandate from heaven, primarily because heaven does not exists and if it did exist it wouldn’t grant any kind of mandate since the point is to let stuff go any which way and then judge souls after death.

Irremarkable ,
@Irremarkable@fedia.io avatar

The joke couldn't have gone further over your head if it had a 3 stage rocket system.

dwindling7373 ,

That’s entirely possible.

Ioughttamow ,

The couch is a metaphor for American political discourse. JD, the crude white “Everyman” that has been rawdogging it a la Gingrich for the past several decades. This went over your head?

morrowind ,
@morrowind@lemmy.ml avatar

Theres more to it. AP published a fact check titled something like “No, JD Vance did not have sex with a couch”.

Later they took this down because they were unable confirm he did not have sex with a couch, only that he did not say so in his book.

As you can guess, this added a lot of fuel to the fire.

wesker ,
@wesker@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

He pumps his dirty little dangler between the cushions.

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