Give him a book called “Attached” by Levine and Heller. I doubt he’ll actually make any changes, but it’s a good way to tell him it’s him without you having to say it at all.
Not necessarily. If she was an anxious attached style she’d be more likely to fall for avoidant men. She could either:
Now recognize the red flags of avoidants and not subject herself to that.
Be unaware of the red flags of avoidants and keep making the same mistake
Recently left a long term relationship as an secure individual and discover how many avoidants really exist.
Of course you are right, she could be avoidant to, in which case hopefully she’ll learn sooner rather than later that fearing intimacy and vulnerability is detrimental, and that healthy codependency is actually a thing. But it’s not easy for them to do so.
I don’t like to think that everyone is incapable of finding someone, people just need to figure out why. Pointing out “single for a reason” seems counterproductive and a bit disrespectful.
I think “single for a reason” is what all that attachment theory shit is trying to help contextualize. It specifically sets the context as “single for a fixable reason” if you have the courage and humility to do the work.
It’s not a mistranslation either, the Chinese does match what the English translation mean. Also the name of the account is “Roman Kaohsiung (a city in Taiwan) Citizen”.
They run a fantastic Romaboo page. Apparently they also do local events, getting in full legionary gear and teaching the children how to form a good shield wall. Livin’ the dream
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