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StevenSaus , to autisticadvocacy

This... this hit, and Occam (along with what I know of sociology and economics and such) all track wit h this insight as well.

@autisticadvocacy

neversosimple , to random
@neversosimple@mstdn.social avatar

So what's the idea behind using the hashtag?

It feels unwelcoming to me. Like I shouldn't engage here if I'm not autistic enough. I'm second guessing my own experiences less by the day, but from what I've heard almost everyone with late diagnosis have felt gaslit and left out throughout their lives. With all the self doubt that entails, seeing people proclaiming they're actually autistic feels like yet another "you don't belong here".

BZBrainz , to actuallyautistic
@BZBrainz@mastodonbooks.net avatar

@audhd @Adhdinos @actuallyautistic

COMING SOON!

The large print version of Late-Identified : A Starter Workbook is almost done! This is a starter workbook for those with late-identified and .
I aim to keep the cost of paperbacks the same for equitable access. This version should be live by 8/18/2023!

💫 https://books2read.com/audhd

Private
Tooden ,
@Tooden@aus.social avatar

@Ferles It is rather sad that the school of thought about 30 something years ago, is still prevalent in some quarters today.
@nellie_m @dpnash @axnxcamr @willaful @pathfinder @Moondancer @actuallyautistic

DivergentDumpsterPhoenix , (edited ) to actuallyautistic
@DivergentDumpsterPhoenix@disabled.social avatar

Asking me not to define myself by "my autism" is like asking me not to exist.

https://emergentdivergence.com/2023/08/05/yes-being-autistic-does-define-me/

@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

johnnyprofane1 , to actuallyautistic
@johnnyprofane1@neurodifferent.me avatar

"Calm down."
🧵

G-d, I hate those words. Always have.




@actuallyautistic
@actuallyadhd

I've heard them pretty much every day of my long life.

Delivered in soothing tones...
Helpful tones...
Authoritative...
Anxious...
Angry...
Sometimes accompanied by a slap.

From Parents. Teachers. Priests. Playmates. Lovers. Doctors. Therapists... Each one demanding one thing of me.

👉Control over THEIR own feelings.

By demanding... control of mine.

WHO needs control when I'm sad?
Angry?
Intense?
Passionate?
Proud?
Informative...
Joyful...
or...
Suicidal?

You folks do.

I'm feeling what I'm feeling. And expressing it in ways that are not only the most natural to me... but also the most appropriate...

To the neurology I was born with.

You may not like it.
In the park.
In the grocery store.
In front of strangers.
In front of Aunt Mary.
In 2nd grade.
👇👇👇

With my office door open.
In your waiting room.
On our 3rd date.
In your house...
In your life.

There's a whole wing of autism deniers masquerading as scholars who say we autistics lack a "theory of mind."

Like adult autistics don't deal with typical human minds
👉 24 / 7 / 365.25 ... 👈

YOUR problem with MY behavior is easier to understand than your whole "theory of mind," "behavioral analysis" crap.

I don't get how YOU think or feel.
You don't get how * I * think or feel...
And we rub each other the wrong way. Just like cats and dogs.

👉THIS cat has a theory of your mind. It's simple.

You don't acknowledge what you think or feel.
Not in public.
Lots of times not even to yourself.

S'why y'all drive me crazy.

Why did parents, teachers, "helping" pros, "friends" tell me to calm down?

Not to soothe my distress. To soothe THEIR distress.

👉 Shame?
Not fun to feel ashamed... of your child.

👉 Fear?
Scary when everybody's looking at you.
And you think it's not even your fault.

👉 Anger?
It's frustrating... when you have no control.
Like... when I don't do what you want me to. Fast enuff.

👉 Soothing?
Of course, YOU need soothing...

Every time someone else's pain...
Or bad luck...
Or death...
Reminds you of YOUR danger.

🚨 "Calm down." 🚨

There is never a time that a command...
implying that an autistic person in distress is doing "something wrong"...
helps.

Doesn't matter our age... education... profession... wealth.

And since your "helpful advice" almost certainly inflames their pain... literally adding fuel to the fire in our hearts, minds, and bodies...

You'll NEVER get the outcome you demand... soothing.

You'll just add one more brick to the prison wall of our trauma.

johnnyprofane1 , to actuallyautistic
@johnnyprofane1@neurodifferent.me avatar

Folks have asked what's happening with my health. Haven't had the spoons to really talk since March...

But some older folks may need to know.

Here's the deal.


@actuallyautistic @actuallyadhd

This is a roller coaster. I'm good most mornings for a few hours...

Then I crash. The initial presenting symptom that got me into the doctor was really bad hot flashes. Apparently, I'm told, pretty much identical to "severe" hot flashes accompanying female menopause.

Hard to blv. Kinda weirdly hard on the ego identity. Even embarrassing...

I was so used to autistic burnout that I assumed I was just having a bad one...

Til the only NP I could see with Medicaid finally tested my testosterone. That took over a month...

It was 56.

Normal ~500. Supposed to be a minimum of 300. At least around 200 at my 70 years.

For all males, there are serious implications for neurology, heart, bones and more below 100.

Hospitalization around 30...

But my thyroid and other endocrine systems are involved. And I can't see an endocrinologist until at least November.

PTSD, elderly autism, heavy cannabis use may all be involved. They're each known to depress Teststerone and other hormones.

There's one study on older autistic males and testosterone. We may be prone to such a crash...

There aren't many of us to study...

As you can see I'm fairly available right now...

By mid afternoon I'm likely to be in dysfunctional brain fog, extreme physical fatigue, and possibly paranoid as fuck.

A heads up.

.

btaroli ,
@btaroli@federate.social avatar

@johnnyprofane1 THANK YOU for sharing this. I had no idea could contribute to low ! I hope docs can help get hormones in balance for you. It’s helps when they’re not ignoring. And it underscores perhaps why late diagnosis is imperative. Are similar hormone affects seen in Autistic women, I wonder…? @actuallyautistic @actuallyadhd

Flightlessbird , to random
@Flightlessbird@social.linux.pizza avatar

advice please (with kindness).

Just had my son diagnosed. I lied and said we were getting further advice about his dyslexic strengths and weaknesses. Because I didn't want to tell him unless we were sure as being an adolescent is hard enough.

What's a really good resource that I can use to help explain what it means?

ClaireCopperman , to actuallyautistic
@ClaireCopperman@mastodonapp.uk avatar

I love this sign outside My Small World, a toyshop in , UK 💖 My daughter (aged 21 🥰) cried when she saw it.

We need more businesses, especially ones likely to attract children and adults, to be this welcoming.
@actuallyautistic

BZBrainz , to bookstodon
@BZBrainz@mastodonbooks.net avatar

✅ Do you suspect you have spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)?
✅ Are you late-diagnosed with ( + )?
✅ Are you still trying to identify your traits and describe your experiences to access support?
❇️ Check out Late-Identified AuDHD: A Started Workbook (e-book & paperback available).
➡️ https://books2read.com/audhd
@bookstodon
@Adhdinos
@actuallyautistic

BZBrainz , to bookstodon
@BZBrainz@mastodonbooks.net avatar

✅ Do you suspect you have spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)?
✅ Are you late-diagnosed with ( + )?
✅ Are you still trying to identify your traits and describe your experiences to access support?
❇️ Check out Late-Identified AuDHD: A Started Workbook, available in ebook (major retailers) and paperback (on Amazon & B&N).
➡️ https://books2read.com/audhd
@bookstodon
@Adhdinos
@actuallyautistic

BZBrainz , to actuallyautistic
@BZBrainz@mastodonbooks.net avatar

@actuallyautistic This morning I was called a yokel, a word I have not heard outside of old television in my lifetime until now—among other labels. When I asked them to clarify how they used yokel, the coworker identified many visible traits they had been noting since we met yesterday, paired with appearing young. I had the opportunity to correct them and let my skillset speak for me throughout the day. @audhd

ferrous , to actuallyautistic
@ferrous@neurodifferent.me avatar

A curious thing has happened, where the Questionnaire that @scrappapertiger and I worked on (with a bunch of other people) has gone viral, with millions of people hearing about it while the validation study on the measure is still waiting for peer review.

I wrote about it for the Monotropism site, and made a video, since that's where it's mostly exploded.

What's frustrating is that all the videos that have been watched by hundreds of thousands of people have called it an "autism assessment". That's not what it is! But it should be of interest to everyone who's interested in assessments...

@actuallyautistic
https://monotropism.org/2023/mq/

hosford42 , to actuallyautistic
@hosford42@techhub.social avatar

Is there any law or governing agency in any major country that requires web pages to meet basic accessibility standards? I'm sick to death of websites that I can't read because of motion I can't turn off or scroll past.

If there is such a law, please tell me how I can report content that doesn't meet those standards.







@actuallyautistic
@disability

Richard_Littler , to actuallyautistic
@Richard_Littler@mastodon.social avatar

I'm just finishing up a novel. I've been writing screenplays & other story-led narratives for decades. Classic structure has been drummed into me. But then, when I was diagnosed as neurodivergent, I thought, 'Hold on, maybe the traditional story model is actually a neurotypical device...'
I decided to let my / write my novel. In doing so, I have developed a new revolutionary storytelling model. You're welcome.
@actuallyautistic

essie_is_okay , to disability
@essie_is_okay@aus.social avatar

"Why do autistic people like trains so much?" 🚄

Look I am not a train autistic, but it's undeniable that trains are freaking cool. Trains are interesting, and maybe if more NTs were train people, more cities would have functioning public transport systems. Just saying.





@disability

18+ DivergentDumpsterPhoenix , to autisticadvocacy
@DivergentDumpsterPhoenix@disabled.social avatar

Alexithymia is a significant part of the Autistic experience, and it has huge knock on effects for our mental health and wellbeing.

https://emergentdivergence.com/2023/06/28/autism-and-alexithymia-the-fallout-for-our-mental-health/

@actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

ceruleanarc ,
@ceruleanarc@eldritch.cafe avatar

@DivergentDumpsterPhoenix @actuallyautistic @autisticadvocacy

I hope other find the following statement validating and righteous-anger-inducing rather than invalidating because it's meant to be the former:

is not developed by autists due to their . Alexithymia is developed by autists because continuously invalidate our until we become utterly confused by them and incapable of expressing (or even of knowing) anything about them.

The that our society heaps upon autists is the cause of autistic alexithymia, and we really need to talk more about how "normal" people psychologically fuck us.

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