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I Will Fucking Piledrive You If You Mention AI Again — Ludicity

How stupid do you have to be to believe that only 8% of companies have seen failed AI projects? We can’t manage this consistently with CRUD apps and people think that this number isn’t laughable? Some companies have seen benefits during the LLM craze, but not 92% of them. 34% of companies report that generative AI specifically has been assisting with strategic decision making? What the actual fuck are you talking about?

…

I don’t believe you. No one with a brain believes you, and if your board believes what you just wrote on the survey then they should fire you.

mPony ,

you know what, yes, I love this energy and I want more of it. This is how brave people should talk to management, but it’s how everyone should talk to AI hucksters.

smaximov ,

Is the AI boom the new Blockchain of scams?

Couldbealeotard ,
@Couldbealeotard@lemmy.world avatar

I reckon it’s more like the iPod touch. It’s applying a new idea in an area that is a mismatch for it’s potential. Eventually the best use for the emerging tech will become apparent and the current form will fall away

Sam_Bass ,

Ok whats the problem with Alan Iverson this time?

elias_griffin , (edited )
@elias_griffin@lemmy.world avatar

This gets a vote from me for “Best of the Internet 2024”, brilliant pacing, super braced, and with precision bluntness. I’m going to pretend the Monero remark is not even there, that’s how good it was.

BarbecueCowboy ,

It’s consistently pretty good for writing items with low technical importance and minimal need for accuracy.

I’ll never write a job description myself again and my need for getting with communications for mass correspondence is almost gone.

UnderpantsWeevil ,
@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world avatar

Good for writing things nobody will read and reading things nobody wrote.

elias_griffin ,
@elias_griffin@lemmy.world avatar

Masterful wordsmithing, I must find a place for this quote in my future writing. I’ll save and credit.

Cryophilia ,

Fuck you for wasting my time with bullshit job descriptions then

BarbecueCowboy ,

Honestly, I use it because it does a better job than who we usually use, the items it adds to the Job descriptions usually actually exist.

Cryophilia ,

That’s terrifying

sasquash ,

very interesting read thx for sharing. glad finally someone who actually knows something about “AI” said it.

EnderMB ,

I work in AI as a software engineer. Many of my peers have PhD’s, and have sunk a lot of research into their field. I know probably more than the average techie, but in the grand scheme of things I know fuck all. Hell, if you were to ask the scientists I work with if they “know AI” they’ll probably just say “yeah, a little”.

Working in AI has exposed me to so much bullshit, whether it’s job offers for obvious scams that’ll never work, or for “visionaries” that work for consultancies that know as little about AI as the next person, but market themselves as AI experts. One guy had the fucking cheek to send me a message on LinkedIn to say “I see you work in AI, I’m hosting a webinar, maybe you’ll learn something”.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot of cool stuff out there, and some companies are doing some legitimately cool stuff, but the actual use-cases for these tools where they won’t just be productivity enhancers/tools is low at best. I fully support this guy’s efforts to piledrive people, and will gladly lend him my sword.

alphacyberranger ,
@alphacyberranger@sh.itjust.works avatar

Same here. I have seen and worked in entire projects based on AI bullshit.

Naz ,

Will you sign my petition?

Spesknight ,

Hey, we can always say: how can you check if an AI is working, it doesn’t come to the office? 🤔

tron ,
@tron@midwest.social avatar

Oh my god this whole post is amazing, thought I’d share my favorite excerpt:

This entire class of person is, to put it simply, abhorrent to right-thinking people. They’re an embarrassment to people that are actually making advances in the field, a disgrace to people that know how to sensibly use technology to improve the world, and are also a bunch of tedious know-nothing bastards that should be thrown into Thought Leader Jail until they’ve learned their lesson, a prison I’m fundraising for. Every morning, a figure in a dark hood7, whose voice rasps like the etching of a tombstone, spends sixty minutes giving a TedX talk to the jailed managers about how the institution is revolutionizing corporal punishment, and then reveals that the innovation is, as it has been every day, kicking you in the stomach very hard.

Where the fuck do I donate???

Alphane_Moon OP ,
@Alphane_Moon@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah, this one is the bomb.

WldFyre ,

“Right-thinking”??

pyldriver ,

Right as in the actual definition of the word, no political

Conforming with or conformable to justice, law, or morality.

In accordance with fact, reason, or truth; correct.

Fitting, proper, or appropriate.

WldFyre ,

I get that, didn’t think it was a political meaning. Just seems like an iffy word to me personally, hard to put my finger on it.

Maybe since the inverse would be “wrong-think”?

Cryophilia ,

English your second language? Phrases that seem common to natives may seem off to those who learned English later in life. 'Tis a silly language.

WldFyre ,

No I just suck at English apparently haha

DragonTypeWyvern ,

No, you’re correct, it’s always a little suspect on usage. The kind of thing you only say when you’re up on a high horse, fairly or not.

Alphane_Moon OP ,
@Alphane_Moon@lemmy.world avatar

It’s not that commonly used these days (especially online?), I think the phrasing is a bit old school, but it’s a totally legitimate phrase.

WldFyre ,

Fair enough, had never heard it before but that makes sense

demonsword ,
@demonsword@lemmy.world avatar

very interesting read, thank you

KingThrillgore ,
@KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml avatar

Hacker News was silencing this article outright. That’s typically a sign that its factual enough to strike a nerve with the potential CxO libertarian [slur removed] crowd.

If this is satire, I don’t see it. Because i’ve seen enough of the GenAI crowd openly undermine society/the environment/the culture and be brazen about it; violence is a perfectly normal response.

Alphane_Moon OP ,
@Alphane_Moon@lemmy.world avatar

Fascinating, I am not surprised at all.

Even beyond AI, some of the implicit messaging has got to strike a nerve with that kind of crowd.

I don’t think this is satire either, more like a playful rant (as opposed to a formal critique).

TheFriar ,

What. When did we start censoring shit on lemmy.

awesome_lowlander ,

Hacker News is not Lemmy

TheFriar ,

Sorry, I don’t understand what you mean by that. The person I replied to had “[slur removed]” in their comment, they’re on lemmy.ml

awesome_lowlander ,

Oh that. Yeah lemmy.ml has had a swear filter since day 1. In the early days it wasn’t even optional I think, all the servers had it

TheFriar ,

Hm. I had no idea. Interesting. Isn’t lemmy.ml the lemmy grad sister instance? Like, they’re commies?

awesome_lowlander , (edited )

Yep. Just another example of their ‘free speech’ principles at work

xavier666 ,

What happened to HN? I have now heard HN silencing cetain posts multiple times. Is this enshittification?

KingThrillgore ,
@KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml avatar

HN is run by a VC firm, Y Combinator. One of its largest supporters is OpenAI CEO Sam Altman. Do the math.

xavier666 ,

That’s depressing

AnxiousOtter ,

Sam Altman was actually president of Y combinator from 2014 - 2019. An interesting connection when you realise HN has been actively removing news critical of the Gen AI bubble hype.

elias_griffin ,
@elias_griffin@lemmy.world avatar

I want to confirm this. Hacker News is nothing like it used to be and is approaching the cliff of “group think” narrator, the opposite of Entrepreneurship.

rottingleaf ,

I’m libertarian, I’m against this. I’m also against blockchain scams.

My ideas on digital currencies and something like artificial intelligence are simply an extension of the usual ancap\panarchy ideas. It’s actually a very good test for any libertarian you meet - they’ll usually agree that a “meta-society” consisting of voluntary exterritorial jurisdictions (which can be anything from crack-smoking ancap tribes to solarpunk communes), with some overarching security system to protect those jurisdictions from being ignored by somebody well-armed, is good, then you just have to ask why the systems they like for currencies and this are clearly manifestations of a different ideology.

nialv7 ,

“If something is silenced, then that must mean it is right” is a pretty bad argument. There are genuinely good reasons to ban something. Being unnecessarily aggressive can be one.

Buffalox ,

We need AI because it’s convenient to blame for any problems.

Doomsider ,

That is some good stuff actually. All the haters can focus on non-existent AI and the rest of us can work on improving society while they are distracted. Perfect scapegoat.

widw ,

This is actually more terrifying than you might have intended.

I’ve long thought that the greatest danger AI poses is going to be the “man behind the curtain” effect. If people can blame everything on AI then AI can be a blanket covering deliberate harm.

Imagine if government starts using AI for decision making. You could easily end up with a “man behind the curtain” who’s actually calling all the shots and just pretending it’s the AI doing it. Then you’d effectively have a dictatorship where nobody knows/believes they’re in a dictatorship.

Buffalox ,

Yep AI will definitely be used as stamp of approval for bad decisions. Just give it input and questions in different ways until you get the answer you want, and you can say, hey the fancy AI advised it!

dumples ,

I’ve been a professional data scientist for 5+ years and I’m okay at my job. Good enough to get 3 different jobs at non FAANG companies and I have already 3 or so hype trains and name changes of what words we use for the same tools and techniques. This AI hype is going to be another one of these with a few niche cases.

Most of my job is insisting on doing something correctly and then being told that doesn’t give the “correct” response based on leadership expectations. I just change what I do until I get the results that people want to see. I’ll just ride this hype wave out here for a few years here learning nothing new again. I’ll find another job based on my experience and requirements gathering to start the cycle again. Maybe I’ll get more data engineering skills which are actually valid

funkless_eck , (edited )

Similarly, my current job (now ending as they want to end remote work and I don’t want to move to a desert in a very red/religious area)- I guided them out of “block chain for supply chain” (lmao it’s cringe to even say that now) into “AI for productivity automation”

I give it 3 years max before all mentions of AI are scrubbed from the home page

dumples ,

Yup. I hope we move back to data mining. I loved to joke that I put on my hardhat and go into the data mine every morning

morbidcactus ,

I’m a data engineer/architect and it’s the same over here, I get asked constantly “how can we stuff AI into this solution?”, never “should we consider using AI here? Is there a value?”, my view, people don’t understand their data and don’t want to put in the effort to understand their data and think that it’ll magically pull actionable insights from their dataswamp, nothing new, that’s been a constant for as long as I recall.

Like I totally understand the draw of new and exciting, but there’s so much you can do with traditional analytics, and in my view you really need to have a good foundation before doing anything else.

dumples ,

Well all the fancy tools give people confidence into their terrible data. Crap in leads to crap out

Shadywack ,
@Shadywack@lemmy.world avatar

Using satire to convey a known truth some already understand implicitly, some don’t want to acknowledge, some refuse it outright, but when you think about it, we’ve always known how true it is. It’s tongue-in-cheek but it’s necessary in order to convince all these AI-washing fuckheads what a gimmick it is to really be making sweeping statements about a chatbot that still can’t spell lollipop backwards.

ripcord ,
@ripcord@lemmy.world avatar

I’m not sure this is satire. A lot of hyperbole, but not satire.

Eranziel ,

This. Satire would be writing the article in the voice of the most vapid executive saying they need to abandon fundamentals and turn exclusively to AI.

However, that would be indistinguishable from our current reality, which would make it poor satire.

rimu ,
@rimu@piefed.social avatar

I will learn enough judo to throw you into the sun

best line

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