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programmer_humor

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mindbleach , in Someone needs to be reminded that anticompetitive practices are illegal

“How dare you use software on your hardware,” says another worthless gaggle of bastard morons.

Just have Jensen Huang flop his dick out and say CUDA is an anti-competitive tactic. It wouldn’t be less obvious.

Anticorp , in Yup sums up all my project

My spoon’s too big.

ProfessorProteus ,
@ProfessorProteus@lemmy.world avatar

I am a banana!

NaibofTabr ,

Tuesday is coming… did you bring your coat?

ramius345 ,

I am the queen of France!

EchoCranium ,

For the love of god! My anus is bleeding! (-Yay! Hooray!-)

daellat ,

Insert dick!

This is a reference I’m wondering anyone would get please let me know if you do

SturgiesYrFase ,
@SturgiesYrFase@lemmy.ml avatar

Sorry/your welcome.

Edit: I misread your comment. facepalm
W.e I’m leaving the link to Rejected.

flying_sheep ,
@flying_sheep@lemmy.ml avatar

Surgeon simulator. The funniest video ever

daellat ,

That video sent me back in the day

WldFyre ,

youtu.be/AYjCXjIeNJk?si=1uuDhlOE4RrKLbeV

3:45

One of my favorite vids ever lolol

clyne , in Uh...oh...
@clyne@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

1 in 10 Americans think rust is a good thing.

tatterdemalion , in Yup sums up all my project
@tatterdemalion@programming.dev avatar

Yea except serverless you pay for usage, so if you have zero users, it’s free! Just make sure you put a hard limit on autoscaling.

repungnant_canary , in Uh...oh...

I mean, isn’t it?

myusernameis ,

There is nothing sexual about it I’m afraid.

hansl ,

My kid is learning HTML so… maybe?

VirtualOdour , in Uh...oh...

6 in 10 Americans believe any old nonsense as long as you present it with confidence.

AngryishHumanoid ,

I don’t believe you because the end of your sentence wasn’t emphatic enough. Period. Mic drop.

BleatingZombie ,

73% of numerical statistics go unverified

backhdlp ,
@backhdlp@iusearchlinux.fyi avatar

If you put a decimal in your statistic, it becomes 82.6% more believable.

Anticorp ,

71.2% of all statistics are made-up on the spot.

dalekcaan ,

“You can pretty much come up with whatever quote you want and pretend someone famous said it. Nobody checks anyway.”

-Sun Tzu

Ironfacebuster ,

"This guy is speaking straight facts"

  • George Washington
JoYo , in Uh...oh...
@JoYo@lemmy.ml avatar

Oh I get it, it’s programmer humor because HTML was mentioned.

GlitterInfection ,

I thought it was because STDS were?

Anticorp ,

I think most programmers are safe from STDs.

xigoi ,
@xigoi@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

std::C++ std::programmers std::are std::not.

Kolanaki , in Uh...oh...
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

It’s cool. Those with HTML are likely never to have sex anyway.

BlackPenguins , in Uh...oh...

Cue the Republicans trying to ban HTML from our Internet to protect the kids. Yeah, you do that…

Cold_Brew_Enema , in Uh...oh...

Hyper Tetanus Menstrual Lipomas

hakunawazo ,

Band name.

PiratePanPan , in Uh...oh...
@PiratePanPan@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Close: JS is a disease.

aiden , in Uh...oh...

Who had sex with my website

Anticorp ,

It was me!

umbrella , in Uh...oh...
@umbrella@lemmy.ml avatar

so? most usians cant point to their neighbouring countries on a map.

vegantomato , in Yup sums up all my project
@vegantomato@lemmy.world avatar

Learn to solve problems using programming. Go learn Python. Stick with the basics and have fun. If you start worrying about losing older versions of your code, learn Git. Grow from there.

Kubernetes? Microservices? Cloud platform? These are all distractions and a waste of your time.

SirQuackTheDuck ,

I used to have this enormous dev folder of projects. Some with git, some before I knew what it was.

I clinged and backed it up like crazy, until I actually looked at what was contained (spoiler: horrid code). Then I just got used to burning some old code. Now I’m often distracted by stuff like docker, kubernetes and that stuff

It’s fun though, I’ve grown a bunch. but the setup sometimes does overscale badly

jacecomix ,

I have a personal project that was getting big and unruly, and I’m so happy I learned how to use Docker and converted all the little pieces into their own repos and containers.
That being said, I totally went down rabbit holes that didn’t end up being helpful, like setting up my own CI/CD or trying to learn Kubernetes. They were totally overkill for me.

fruitycoder , in Yup sums up all my project

But those are th3 fun parts!

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