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SCB ,

Free gravel for life. Just become a gravel wholesaler. Corner the market instantly.

Wogi ,

The price of gravel has plummeted. You now have a mountain of gravel and no one willing to buy it for more than what it would cost to transport it.

SCB ,

So what you’re saying is, I have a ton of free rocks!

Let’s goooooo

Rediphile ,

That fine, I’ll take the loss for now and later raise prices again once all the other gravel suppliers die out.

Arthur_Leywin ,

1 and 2. The gravel to sell and the oysters to get a sense of how communications with other animals work. If I can communicate with an oyster, my understanding of communication could potentially extrapolate to higher animals.

Clbull ,

2 and 3 without question.

You’d make ludicrous money from the construction industry with an unlimited supply of gravel, while being able to teleport 7 inches would be useful for break-ins.

Halvdan ,

My thoughts exactly. God-tier talents, both of them. But if you got #2 you don’t really need to steal. I would use #3 to undress. Easily saves 5-10 seconds at bedtime. Or become the naked burglar of course.

HauntedCupcake ,

The teleport for break-ins only works if you and the object you want to go through are less than 7 inches thick. I’m not sure you could do anything with it

kolastor ,

Most doors and fences are, in fact, less than 7 inches thick. You probably couldn’t get into a vault, but simple B&E would be trivial.

maniclucky ,

Yes, but how thick are you? If you are 7.1 inches thick, your back will move forward into the thing you’re trying to avoid.

kolastor ,

Ah, I figured it was measuring front to back, not center to center. I’d say they’re both valid interpretations.

captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

It depends. Is 7" measured from the center of my body to the next location? Or is it measured from the tip of the front of my body and the back of my body will end up 7" away from that position? Because the former would likely be useless for breaking into places. My body would make up the majority of the travel distance. I basically would only have 1"-3" or teleport distance to work with. Most walls wouldn’t even work.

As someone else said, if I could spam the teleport command, then it would be great. Then I could travel across oceans and such. But I’d have to be careful to not transport myself inside of a boat’s hull and get spliced.

The gravel would be great though. With an unlimited supply, I’d just create a turbine which is turned by an unlimited amount of gravel pouring over it. The gravel would have to end up somewhere… Can’t just leave it on earth. So I would ask countries - in exchange for the free energy - to build a space elevator/launching mechanism. The gravel would be launched into space towards the sun. This would be a problem in a few million or billion years. I’d accelerate the death of the sun by increasing its mass or maybe my gravel would add too many sunspots. Idk. But who cares. By then we will be space faring. One major issue is I’ll die in 50 years give or take. So I’ll need to spend most of my time spawning a surplus of gravel somewhere so the governments of the world can continue turning the turbine? Idk. That’s a big problem.

Maybe I’d just start a construction company.

Clbull ,

Another thing to consider, if you miss your mark, do you blink as close as possible to the object you’re trying to go through or does it impale/telefrag you?

captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

Definitely impale

captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

Definitely impale

NeonWoofGenesis ,
@NeonWoofGenesis@l.henlo.fi avatar

Well then the air molecules will also impale your whole body

captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

Oh that’s true. I guess we have to allow for displacement. If that’s the case, yeah I want this power 100%. Spam teleport. I could destroy anything in the world just with displacement. I could punch a hole through tanks just by teleporting. And if I have no “cool down” when teleporting I could level entire armies. I could teleport once every nanosecond even bullets that are timed to hit me down to the nanosecond would only penetrate my body a small amount before I teleport and displace them.

Clbull ,

Well option 3 suddenly sucks a lot more.

Maybe it’ll be a neat party trick.

kSPvhmTOlwvMd7Y7E ,

Marvel 's writers picking up next super power

Here4CatPics ,

3 and 8

Then I can Time Warp to the past and become a king! Or holy figure

Wogi ,

You have died of dysentery

Here4CatPics ,

That’s fair

Emerald ,

Teleport and spam it. Go hundreds of miles an hour

hydrospanner ,

24 hour cool down on the teleport skill in the next balance patch.

captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

Totally nerfs that power. I’ll go with the free gravel.

RampantParanoia2365 ,

3 and 4: Fastest Bloodhound in the West

looseanus ,
captainjaneway ,
@captainjaneway@lemmy.world avatar

I’d pick teleport but I’m afraid of the splicing consequences.

I’d rather just see inside empty objects. I’m sure I could use this in some circumstances. Being able to “know” if a box is empty or not could be perceived as super natural. There is probably a lot of money in that. Plus, a lot of gambling opportunities in things like that cup game. What defines a container? That could change things.

Controlling any toaster with my mind is ambiguous. I’ll assume it only works on toasters with power. So I can only turn them on/off to make toast. I could use this power to destroy countries. Power draw of a toaster isn’t too bad, but every toaster being turned on at the same time might damage an energy sector. It would take a while to debug as well.

I like the free gravel.

I think I’d pick free gravel and… Seeing inside empty objects. Seems like the most profitable with the least chance of a monkeys paw.

Corkyskog ,

Everyone discounts oyster knowledge… But is the gravel unlimited? Like could I just demand 730,000 Tonnes of gravel tomorrow?

occhionaut ,

Weal, gravel be upon ye

HW07 ,

Say some phrase in Khitan, then teleport. Become a world-famous magician as no one would believe you’re actually teleporting. The Khitan is for the show. Also drive all those people trying to debunk your trick insane.

Plus it’d be incredible for heists, there’s no mention of a cooldown so just spam it and piston-translocation glitch your way through some complex.

occhionaut ,

Careful. Do it too much and you’ll get gravgun-taken by the admins for a stern talking to.

pinkdrunkenelephants ,

3 and 5. I would wreak so much havoc, it’d be fucking great

ohlaph ,

What would you do with 5?

MeDuViNoX ,
@MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works avatar

Weld toasters to weapons of war and take over the world.

ohlaph ,

Okay, okay, calm down.

Corkyskog ,

1 & 7 or 2 & 7 rough choices.

With the oysters you could probably ascertain way more knowledge than you expected.

MeDuViNoX ,
@MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works avatar

They all just chant, “OYST! OYST! OYST!” forever like Pokemon.

veniasilente ,

3 and 5 are a potentially broken combo. In particular if “control a toaster” means control and not just “operate”, since then it’s basically toasterkinesis, or being able to instantly turn any toaster into a bomb. "teleport up to 10 inches away sounds like it wouldn’t be too useful but it does, in principle, allow you to phase out incoming bullets and a fair amount of lateral blade hits if you time it right.

6 and 7 could have some interesting, niche uses in some fields. 6 for example could be used for intimidation if “10 hours younger” is interpreted chronologically: even after taking a serious wound, you’d look pristine for around 10 hours so it might be used to scare or distract some enemies.

I’m… not even sure what 4 or 9 could ever be used for.

RickRussell_CA ,
@RickRussell_CA@lemmy.world avatar

9 you could sell to a paraplegic

Moebius ,

1 and 2, but really only 1. If I can talk to oysters then I can figure out how to grow black pearls better and make some serious cash. If the oysters decide they don’t want to help then I can sell gravel.

ikidd ,
@ikidd@lemmy.world avatar

#2 is a farmer’s wet dream.

LostWon ,

Depending on how fast the teleport is, whether there’s a delay between uses and whether it causes significant fatigue or other side effects, I might take that. Other than that, it’s a toss-up for me between the extinct language and communicating with oysters.

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