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ShitOnABrick , to lemmyshitpost in toxic
@ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world avatar

The last human

BestBouclettes ,

A bitchy trampoline if you ask me

ShitOnABrick , (edited )
@ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world avatar

A bitchy trampoline 🧴👋🥒💦😭 (edit: it was a hard nut but I tried)

aregularbeaneater , to lemmyshitpost in wait for it
db2 , to lemmyshitpost in book club fed

Grandpa dad more like.

verstra ,

She is taking to her children, saying that their grampa is in prison.

shani66 ,

And it’s well known that Trump has a thing for Ivanka, he’s making an incest joke

mishielda1234 ,

Don’t know why you’re getting downvoted, you’re right. Ivanka is Donald and Ivana Trump’s daughter, who is “writing” about talking to her kids. Trump’s daughter’s kids are his grandkids. Seems pretty straightforward to me.

Gakomi , to lemmyshitpost in toxic

This is a Doctor Who referenced

Kolanaki , to lemmyshitpost in toxic
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

moisturize fabric softener me!

rickdg , to lemmyshitpost in book club fed
@rickdg@lemmy.world avatar

Worst case for him is house arrest, so actual golfing.

Best case, he’s back to fumbling as a non-convicted criminal, so still golfing.

punkaccountant , to lemmyshitpost in book club fed

Not sure if it’s bad photoshop or bad angle…but it looks like there is only one leg coming out of her dress.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA ,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

You’ve never seen her hop?

Varven , to lemmyshitpost in toxic
@Varven@lemmy.world avatar

Doctor who reference

wesker , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot
@wesker@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

Protip: lick the end of the bag, so the plastic sticks to your fingers

crony ,
@crony@lemmy.cronyakatsuki.xyz avatar

My fingers naturally can open them dry, no need for licking.

HotsauceHurricane ,

OOOh FANCY PANTS RICH MCGEE OVER HERE.

onion ,

Fancy pants? More like greasy hands!

crony , (edited )
@crony@lemmy.cronyakatsuki.xyz avatar

I can wash my hand for 2 minutes thoroughly, and will still open a bag with no issues

MudMan ,

My personal lifehack is to hold the side that opens between my lips and blow, that loosens them up pretty reliably.

And if you're lucky it makes a farting noise, so I consider that a bonus.

PahassaPaikassa ,

Even prorer tip: pull the handles gently apart from each other, the pulling will make the plastic to come apart and then you can grab the edges and open it.

This works in finnish supermarkets, dunno if the bags are the same over there.

downpunxx OP ,

find the grocery store vegetable rain forest get those little soldiers moist

bmsok ,

Hashtag producestrong

whereBeWaldo ,

I just eat the bag, its easier, free and delicious with the added benefit of supplying my daily microplastic demand

steelyDansSteamedHam ,

And I will not stop until my testicles can be used as ping pong balls!

scytale , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot

I remember back at the height of the pandemic, I saw this lady licking her finger so she can open those plastic bags, then proceeded to touch multiple vegetables and fruits.

Iapar ,

Of course people touch those all the time. Maybe they sneezed before entering the store etc. Always wash the things you consum before because you never know.

And with the bag you just breath on your findertips and then you have some grip. And the you, of course, proceed to touch every vegetable and fruit you can lay your filthy fingers on.

scytale ,

Oh for sure, I know people with more filthy hands probably touched the produce, and I do wash them when I get home. I was just sharing something I remember at a time where spreading bodily fluids was an extra concerning thing.

And no, I personally do not touch the produce. I open the plastic bag just with my hands, invert it to wrap around my hand, and grab the produce with it. So my hands never directly touch them.

idunnololz ,
@idunnololz@lemmy.world avatar

During the pandemic (and also to this date) I open bags sometimes by visiting the refrigerator section and touching the bed of the shelves. A lot of grocery stores have fridges that spray water in the section so it will get my fingers wet. It’s even easier if Im buying a vegetable from that section, since I just have to touch the thing I’m buying and my fingers will be wet enough to open the bag.

Xephonian ,

OMG. Did you know you have germs on you RIGHT NOW!?

Better drink bleach to take care of the germs internally too, just to be safe.

AngryCommieKender ,
Xephonian ,

Love an Invader Zim reference.

ameancow ,

I wet my finger on the drops that fall from the misting nozzles in the produce area. Works every time, no licking. You’re all welcome.

mryessir ,

Pff. I once saw some crack-y woman using the entire shelf of makeup in the store.

faizalr , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot
@faizalr@kbin.run avatar

Nice tshirt.

saltesc , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot

Easy Mode. Try having a dog lead around your wrist while opening a biodegradable poo bag that got wet in drizzle…

bitchkat ,

I get the bag ready while she’s dropping the duece.

Daxtron2 , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot

I’ve never understood the point of these bags. I have no problem just not using them?

whereBeWaldo ,

I don’t want the stuff I buy to touch the shopping cart or the conveyor also it is easier to separate them from other stuff in the fridge when you get back home

FireRetardant ,

Do you have any idea how many boxes, crates, hands and other surfaces the produce has already touched? Its also just sitting in the open at the store for people to touch, sneeze on, drop on the floor. The carts and the conveyor won’t make it any worse and you should be washing all produce before eating it anyway.

whereBeWaldo ,

Yeah I am aware of all of that, and I wash the stuff always. Even if the bag gets me no benefits it still makes me feel more at ease.

Esqplorer ,

Future generations hate you

whereBeWaldo ,

What a coincidence I hate them as well

Iapar ,

I’m hooked on a feelin’

I’m high on believin’

🎶

Spitzspot ,
@Spitzspot@lemmings.world avatar

Babies’ diapers leak and the carts are almost never cleaned.

Stovetop ,
  • Loose small produce like beans or cherries - keeps them all together.
  • Moistened produce like kale or cilantro - keeps everything else in the bag from getting wet.
  • Produce with flaky detritus like onions or garlic - keeps pieces of peel from getting everywhere.
  • Raw meat prone to leakage - keeps other items in the bag from being exposed to potential pathogens.

They sell reusable mesh bags to help with the first scenario, but they aren’t really helpful for the other 3. I also try to be mindful of not buying more reusable bags I don’t need because most of those end up in landfills long before the 100/200/500/20,000 uses needed to offset the number of plastic bags you’d use otherwise.

Paper bags would help for the first and third scenarios as well, but not the other two. And single-use paper is nearly as bad.

Semi_Hemi_Demigod ,
@Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world avatar

Moistened produce like kale or cilantro - keeps everything else in the bag from getting wet.

Moistening leafy greens makes the rot faster. I hate that grocery stores do this. I’ve even seen them spraying bags of greens, which is just a waste of water.

lamabop , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot

Learn to moisturise goddamnit

sirico , to lemmyshitpost in well shoot
@sirico@feddit.uk avatar

All that stuff was in dirt not long ago it’ll be fine without one

MutilationWave ,

Dirt AND shit!

Xephonian ,

I think they are for checkout convenience. That’s why they’re so thin, don’t mess up the weight.

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