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thefartographer

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thefartographer ,

They got their rocks off with Hunter’s dick-pics. As long as they can make someone feel powerless, their de-aging potion works for another three months.

thefartographer ,

Electric Mechanical buggalo

thefartographer ,

offer to suck before claiming he’s never seen or heard of that dick before

thefartographer ,

Let’s buy a couple of Trump NFTs and create a line called “Trump-meme vapes” where we put Trump’s NFT on the label and a meme used by Trump supporters. We’ll offer beautiful-sounding flavors such as:

  • Ocean Breeze
  • Champion’s Dinner
  • Billionaire Mystique

Which will actually taste like:

  • fish
  • happy meal
  • poop

Call ourselves a parody company and send all proceeds to Harris

thefartographer ,

The oranges taste like shit! The strawberries taste like shit! The snozzberries taste like shit!

Trump’s Everlasting Shit Sticks

thefartographer ,

Someone call Lorena Bobbitt!

thefartographer ,

Have you ever met a toddler? Try doing peekaboo 4 times with a 3-year-old and then tell them you’re bored. Unless you’re willing to deal with screams for 16 hours, you’re only about 996 peekaboos away from a satisfied toddler.

Locking an iphone for only 10 years sounds like a toddler with a short attention span.

thefartographer ,

Debuckle is what my dad did before I got the belt

Whoever says parents aren’t hitting their kids enough either weren’t abused much as a child or were abused far too much. I was abused just enough to avoid ever having kids.

he got his bachelor's in gender studies circa 1492 (beehaw.org)

[alt text: a post on twitter by @Ranting_Trans, posted in June 2022. The text in the post says: “People only ask ‘what is a woman’ and not ‘what is a man’, because that question was already answered by the greatest philosopher of our time: Dracula”. Below the text is a screenshot from the game Castlevania: Symphony...

thefartographer ,

Games aren’t about fun! I don’t appreciate your whimsical attitude, it scares the serious adult in me!

thefartographer ,

Some say the end is near

thefartographer ,

North Panamarica

thefartographer ,

Holy fuck!!!

thefartographer ,

I bet they’re gonna BLAST them! In a literary sense

thefartographer ,

⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️
…⬜️

thefartographer ,

Not Excel, but one of the most hilarious uses of Google Sheets I’ve ever seen

thefartographer ,

Politics under the guise of religious differences?

thefartographer ,

I think she is a legend for what she did and I think USPS was absolutely right to fire her for it.

I hope the mail goes back to being apolitical and that she experiences a soft landing and strong launch career-wise

thefartographer ,

Well, maybe I’d know that if I’d read the article. Did you ever consider that I was being lazy and vocal while uninformed?!

I don’t know why I’m making it seem like this is your fault, but I hope you’ve learned your lesson

thefartographer ,

Don’t read? More like can’t read!

I dunno, I decided to react to something while only informed by other uninformed comments. It was a poor choice.

thefartographer ,

20-foot lifted vehicles would probably be considerably safer:

  1. They’d easily have the clearance to safely navigate over most pedestrians in their path.
  2. Any attempts to balance them well would be incredibly expensive and you’d likely have many drivers whose cars would fall over from insufficiently sized tires or whatever.

Hmmm… 🤔 Now that I think about it, maybe we should subsidize these lift kits to make this a self-solving problem

thefartographer ,

Me looking at that rabioli

thefartographer ,

Yay! Street pills!

thefartographer ,

It’s just gonna fall off the Empire State Building trying to save Nicole Kidman

thefartographer ,

He must have shouted that quote so that the interviewer could hear him with his head so far up Elon’s ass

thefartographer ,

I’m not going to go to some backwoods country and tell them how to live their lives

“Nah, we like your people oppressed”

thefartographer ,

He liked fava beanis

thefartographer ,

How do they even afford to eat???

thefartographer ,

I aughtta beat you with a switch

thefartographer ,

Which is why I always bring a knife to a pillow fight!

I’ve lost many friends…

thefartographer ,

Something something outsourcing calls and other Indian stereotypes

thefartographer ,

And instead of paying them, pay 500 toddlers $2 each to kick them in the shins their entire career

thefartographer ,

Lots of experimenting

thefartographer ,

Why… Wh- what? Do you sweat blood?

thefartographer ,

I’m sure someone has. It probably tastes like popcorn or something

thefartographer ,

Probably doing a golf pop

Ditch and pitch: Alaska Republican Party passes resolution to end ranked-choice voting in November (mustreadalaska.com)

The Alaska Republican Party, during its quarterly meeting that took place in Fairbanks on Saturday, passed a resolution that recommends Alaskans vote “Yes” on Ballot Measure 2, which would restore the voting procedures that were in place before voters approved ranked-choice voting methods in 2020....

thefartographer ,

While I don’t agree with your statement, as a republican, I have no ability to tell you whether I like or dislike what you’ve said. I know which one and only statement I like, and your statement was not it.

\s

Liz Cheney blocked January 6 scrutiny of Ginni Thomas, book says (www.theguardian.com)

Liz Cheney, the Republican vice-chair of the House January 6 committee, did “all she could” to protect the rightwing supreme court justice Clarence Thomas and his wife, the political activist Ginni Thomas, by blocking an in-depth investigation of Ginni’s involvement in Donald Trump’s attempt to overturn the 2020...

thefartographer ,

“I really think we should listen to what Jeremy has to say. Sure, he gets drunk and challenges children to fight him at the playground, and yes he might be a tiny bit of an arsonist, and if you’re gonna nitpick then yes he stomps on pigeons in the park, but you don’t understand! I saw him accidentally knock over an old lady the other day and he apologized! Not only that, he made sure she was okay! I think he’s truly reformed and we should trust him now.”

Also, I get why you said “pheasant” hunt and thought that was hilarious, but c’mon… If there were ever a time to bring up duck hunting, shouldn’t it be now by the infamous @FuglyDuck?

thefartographer ,

Wait wait wait, now you’re just bungling the story tooooo much.

  • It was a quail hunt, not pheasant
  • Yes, security detail was there, but he didn’t shoot any of them. He shot a lawyer and the secret service helped him
  • The lawyer he shot also had a heart attack from one of the pellets getting close to his heart
  • The secret service claim they waited an entire fucking hour before notifying the local sheriff
  • The sheriff said they didn’t find out until the next day

What probably happened is he got target fixation while the bird flew in a path that… well… ooooppsssies

You forgot the best part of the whole “ooooppsssies”:
The fucking lawyer later went on tv TO APOLOGIZE TO DICK CHENEY FOR HIS BAD PUBLICITY DUE TO GETTING SHOT IN THE FACE

thefartographer ,

submitting false payment claims to Medicare, Medicaid and other federal health care programs between 2009 and 2020 for prescriptions that were processed but never picked up

It took 40 years, but we finally found a welfare queen!

thefartographer ,

You know, we’ve made massive leaps in HIV therapies and potential cures. While it’s ill-advised to seek out HIV or to treat it as a non-issue, the fact that this is being used as some sort of a scare-tactic by politicians within a world superpower is far more of an indictment of the American healthcare system than it is if any immigrants.

thefartographer ,

But yea, the single mom who wants help so she can actually see her children grow up and not have to work all the time is the problem.

God, I wish the welfare queen myth were true. If something like that were actually possible, I’d finally believe all the BuT tHE ecOnOmY whiners

thefartographer ,

Oh shit, I didn’t even think about that… How long you think until we roll back the name to GRIDS and pretend like straight people can’t get it?

Condoms and not sharing needles are just masks for your dick and blood, amirite?

thefartographer ,

We appreciate the candid feedback, and the passion the community has put forth around the current topics here on Reddit, our forums and across numerous social media outlets. Our team will continue to make changes and monitor community feedback and update everyone as soon as and as often as we can.

thefartographer ,

squints Where??

Florida school district must restore books with LGBTQ+ content under settlement (apnews.com)

A school district in northeast Florida must put back in libraries three dozen books as part of a settlement reached Thursday with students and parents who sued over what they said was an unlawful decision to limit access to dozens of titles containing LGBTQ+ content....

thefartographer ,

Not my book, I won’t let you! Okay, you can read it but don’t tell any of your friends.

thefartographer ,

less known older brother

Hence the old adage “Less is Moe and more is Les”

thefartographer , (edited )

I haven’t seen Stephen Miller have a meltdown like that since his hairline liquefied and ran down his face

Edit: I guess only Ghouliani’s hair ran down his face. Miller just dusted his head with Norelco trimmings

Trump Says He's Done Debating: 'THERE WILL BE NO THIRD DEBATE!' (www.mediaite.com)

When a prizefighter loses a fight, the first words out of his mouth are, “I WANT A REMATCH.” Polls clearly show that I won the Debate against Comrade Kamala Harris, the Democrats’ Radical Left Candidate, on Tuesday night, and she immediately called for a Second Debate. She and Crooked Joe have destroyed our Country, with...

thefartographer ,

When a prizefighter loses a fight, the first words out of his mouth are, “I WANT A REMATCH.”

Sure, but when an unprepared bigot loses a fight, they limp around pretending to be fine while saying whatever it takes to not get punched again.

Content warnings: blood, violence, language, body shaming. Honestly, about 98% of the people in this video are shitty people, but you get to see a couple of racists/bigots lose fights and admit they were wrong.

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