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Flickerby

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Flickerby ,

Not anymore. Thank you nutrionist Dogg

Flickerby ,

Maybe you should talk to them first instead of wishing for them to pay for help not involving you.

Flickerby ,

You seem like a very angry person. You should probably stop calling people ‘tards’ and ‘pussies’ while you advocate for for mental health and against sexism but I would first work on that near homicidal rage you seem to be harboring.

Advice on helping a loved one through alcoholism?

My fiance has been struggling a lot lately with this and it’s taking a toll on me. I’m doing all I can and all I know how to do but it’s getting really hard and exhausting to deal with the constant cycle of abuse and then apology and then abuse and then apology over and over and over again for months. Usually day by day. I...

Flickerby OP ,

Yeah she has an appointment with a non religious help group soon, AA would just make it worse for her I know. The thing is when she’s sober she really DOES want to get help. And then she gets cravings and she caves and it’s always just one but then just one turns into two turns into 6 turns into 12…She hates herself the next morning and it’s real regret. She wants help, and she knows she needs it, but she’s just struggling with actually going through with cutting everything out

Flickerby OP ,

Neither of us want children and yes I really true love her. I’m not planning on leaving her I just want to help her through this. I know she can do this and I believe in her and I’m not going to give up on her until she gives up on herself. I’d take a bullet for her no second thought.

Flickerby OP ,

That was my move tonight yeah. I’m just looking for help on what to do moving forward. I had issues with alcohol myself when I was in my early 20s so I can empathize with what she’s going through, and I got through it, so she can too

Flickerby OP ,

I do know the satanic temple yeah, neither of us are religious. She might actually be a bit jazzed if it’s from there honestly, thank you, I’ll look into it

Flickerby OP ,

Thank you very much, I wasn’t aware of the distinction, I’ll look into that. I have been debating calling the national alcohol abuse hotline myself and just seeing if they can give advice on how to deal with this myself.

Flickerby OP ,

Well I had issues with drinking myself when I was younger and I got through it decently fine. I’m sorry you’ve had such a bad experience yourself but I’m really hoping it doesn’t turn out that way here. Though I do know the possibility exists. When she’s sober she still says she wants help. As long as she doesn’t give up entirely on herself I’m not giving up on her either.

Flickerby OP ,

How did that go for you? I know it’s a personal thing but if you would be willing to expand on your experiences there in AA a little I would appreciate it, thank you

Flickerby OP ,

Yeah I’ve tried directing her to the /stopdrinking community but she doesn’t want to do that. She’s had some bad experiences with people online. And I guess people in general. She does like to read though, maybe if it’s a book she’d be more open to it, thank you

Flickerby OP ,

Thank you for this, I know she can get through this and come out okay on the other side. I hope she doesn’t have to almost die for that to happen though

Flickerby OP ,

Unfortunately she doesn’t really have any support besides me. At least, none that she trusts herself. I’m trying to encourage her to make friends and branch out a bit but she’s very anxious and shy which, I get, I am too. And yeah I’ve been really bad about saying “no more drinking” and then letting her convince me with “oh baby it’s just ONE I PROMISE it’ll be fine tonight” and it never is. But I put my foot down last night and I do intend to stick by it this time because I’ve tried a gentle caring lax attitude and that didn’t work so this is it now I guess.

Flickerby OP ,

Oh duh, thank you, I can’t believe I didn’t think of that myself sooner. Yeah maybe I’ll go there too. Though I haven’t even opened that since they killed RiF

Flickerby OP ,

Thank you, I did need to hear that. When I called up my brother he said a lot of the same stuff. I know there’s a possibility she’s going to choose alcohol over our relationship and I’m ready to recognize when that happens. But I don’t think it’s there yet. If she doesn’t go to this counseling meeting she scheduled then I’ll have to rethink things, unfortunately. I know from experience how bad it can be and how little you care about other people when you’re in that hole but sometimes you just need someone to throw you a rope down to help you climb up and I’m hoping that’s the case here. And that she chooses to take it and make the effort to climb up herself.

Flickerby OP ,

Thankfully I have a fairly large support network of family and friends I can rely on. I’ll be okay no matter what happens. I just want her to be okay too

Flickerby OP ,

Have done this, not video, but texts. She was horrified and embarrassed and swore it would never happen again. And then it happened…like, thirty more times. So I don’t think that’ll work unfortunately

Flickerby OP ,

I know, we’re both predisposed to alcoholism, we’ve both had family die to it. I’ve struggled with it a little bit myself in my younger years. I know that if she chooses alcohol over us then there’s nothing I can do about it. And honestly it’s right at that point now. I love her and I always want to be there for her, but if she pushes me away I…I mean I know I deserve better and I know I can’t live like that but I’m just going to do my damndest for as long as I can. She’d do the same for me.

Flickerby ,

Don’t imagine they knew who it was before paying for it, seeing as the only way to see who it was is to pay for it first. To be fair I’d be surprised and uncomfortable if I knew my kid had a teacher who they could find videos of her spread eagle naked whenever they wanted. If the sexes were reversed and it was a male porn star who was teaching children there would be a national uproar. I don’t have anything against sex work but some jobs just don’t really mesh together too well, this is one such situation. The obvious solution is just to pay our fucking teachers more so they don’t have to get second jobs to live but people would rather just yell at her like she’s doing this for shits and giggles because that’s easier than addressing the root problem.

Flickerby ,

Yeah agree entirely. And we’ll pay it for as the years go on. I really don’t understand how investing in the future of our country is somehow a partisanship issue. I guess republicans just love inflicting misery more than their so called “patriotism”.

Flickerby ,

…Kids DO use the internet? And know how to swipe credit cards from their parents? Like this isn’t new, this has been thing since the late 90s lol

Flickerby ,

I’m a millenial lifelong socialist atheist with gay/trans parents but go off I guess. If you actually read my comment you’d notice that I have nothing against her and instead said she should be paid more so she wouldn’t have to go on only fans.

Games that require you to unlock the basic functions of the game can suck my nuts.

I have recently played 3 games that have forced a lengthy, unskippable tutorial section that runs for several hours of the game, just to unlock the most basic functions like buying the items, customizing features, multiplayer, and even 2-player split screen modes....

Flickerby ,

I thought you were talking about mobile games or something locked behind a paywall before I read further and realized you’re mad that multi-player is “locked” behind someone completing a tutorial. I haven’t played either of the two games you mentioned by name but I would imagine that they are complicated/unique enough where a tutorial is warranted. It’s kind of annoying if you just want to hop in and go, sure, but if “most of the fucking game” content consists of the beginning tutorial then you bought the wrong game to begin with.

Flickerby ,

Tutorials are designed for the dumbest person out there who has zero idea what they’re doing. So in this case someone who has never driven a car or played a racing game before. If a tutorial told you “this works like the last game, do the same” it’s obviously bad design. Yeah that’s a super small subset of the people playing the game but it’s better to overexplain than underexplain. But in this case yeah they should 100% just have a separate tutorial mode section for people who need it, having that REQUIRED in a racing game is ridiculous. I haven’t played racing games in years but last I remember that’s what used to be the norm.

What is something (feature, modes, settings...) you would like to see become a standard in video games?

I’ve been thinking about making this thread for a few days. Sometimes, I play a game and it has some very basic features that are just not in every other game and I think to myself: Why is this not standard?! and I wanted to know what were yours....

Flickerby ,

Fully (or at least more) customisable controller settings. It’s not difficult. Let me bind what controls I want to what button I want. And adjust the stick dead zone, god damn. Why are you giving me pre set control schemes when we’ve had fully customizable controls figured out for decades? Fuck you game

Flickerby ,

Guessing you played BG3 and wanted to check out Larian’s other stuff? I always had Beast as summoner whenever I used him. He’s a battlemage by default so summoner isn’t too far off really. Summoner is also REALLY REALLY good, even without the gift pack mod buff. Since summoner stuff only relies on your skill points and not attributes you can basically dump intelligence for constitution/strength/memory if you need it too. Faster movement is basically necessary to me too, I’ve sunk so many hundreds of hours in that game and missing so many trophies just because it feels so slow without it.

Flickerby ,

Unlike BG3 DOS2 is undeniably better playing as an origin character. They tell you their default classes when you recruit them for first time. Larian games are easy enough that you don’t have to min max at all, just do what you like and you’ll have a smooth time regardless of difficultly

Flickerby ,

Pillars 1 was more than a bit of a mess. Pillars 2 I love. It has problems on console but I love it despite them. It is a badass fucking pirate RPG sim at the least lol.

Flickerby ,

Should try pillars 2, they have user programmable AI for your companions so you don’t have to micromanage

Flickerby ,

Yeah including both. If you’ve ran them before and you know the systems they’re surprisingly simple. If you want a REALLY really easy time with DOS2 just go two Lone Wolf and you’ll clear half the enemies before they can sneeze. If you’re going into them 100% blind I can see tactician being tricky though yeah

Flickerby ,

Oh what you were singling out BG3, yeah this one is the easiest by far out of the three including the two DOS

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