programmer_humor

anton , 2 months ago in [Request] Looking for resources on terrible algorithms, architecture, and design

I can’t find the name/source at the moment, but if you enumerate all turing machines and run them concurrently* you will find the optimal algorithm for your problem in O(1) and executed that.
To my knowledge the algorithm is so inefficient on small input that it takes hours to solve integer addition.

• You run the first turing machine one step, than the first two one additional step, that the first tree… This allows you to run an unlimited amount of TMs an unlimited amount of steps.

uebquauntbez , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

Sorry Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that

Valmond , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

void teleport(Person person);

Test_Tickles , 2 months ago

I’ve always said that teleporters are just suicide machines that sometimes spit a clone out somewhere else.

treeshateorcs , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

everyone watch this clip and tell me what you think

www.youtube.com/watch?v=szzVlQ653as

what if it’s year 3000 right now and we’re all playing a game?

ZILtoid1991 , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

<span style="color:#323232;">throws UserNotPaidException
</span>

SlopppyEngineer , 2 months ago

Welcome to Life

RamblingPanda , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

It needs an empty catch block

neo , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

Are you sure the roon of today is a reference to yesterday’s roon?

supercriticalcheese , 2 months ago in When your iRobot finally achieve teleportation

damnit it found the wormhole in the storage room

stage_owl , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

Soma is a wonderful game that covers this type of thing. It does make you wonder what consciousness really is… Maybe the ability to perceive and store information, along with retrieving that information, is enough to provide an illusion of consistent self?

Or maybe it’s some competely strange system, unkown to science. Who knows?

Halosheep , 2 months ago

I don’t think anything gave me existential doom quite as much as the ending of that game.

GnomeKat , 2 months ago

I think the definition of consciousness needs to not be solely about abilities or attributes. It needs to account for the active process of consciousness. Like a hair dryer can burn things… but a fire is things burning. Without the active nature its simply not conscious.

intensely_human , 2 months ago

Maybe consciousness is everywhere, and has nothing to do with mechanisms.

intensely_human , 2 months ago

Provide the illusion to whom?

GammaGames , 2 months ago

Self? Seemed pretty clear in their comment

wallmenis , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

What if you do it in a ship of theseus type of way. Like, swapping each part of the brain with an electronic one slowly until there is no brain left.

Wonder if that will work.

MBM , 2 months ago

If I remember right, the game The Talos Principle calls that the Talos principle

intensely_human , 2 months ago

Sounds like the sort of the The Talos Principle would call that

Schmoo , 2 months ago

The tv show Pantheon figures it will work, but it will be very disturbing.

localme , 2 months ago

Was looking for the Pantheon reference in this thread! Just finished that show and loved it. Of course it takes plenty of liberties for the sake of the storytelling, but still, at least it explores these interesting topics!

Anyone reading this thread, do yourself a favor and check out Pantheon!

ChewTiger , 2 months ago

Right? Like what if as cells die or degrade instead of being replaced by the body naturally they are replaced by nanites/cybernetics/tech magic. If the process of fully converting took place over the course of 10 years, then I don’t see how the subject would even notice.

It’s an interesting thing to ponder.

intensely_human , 2 months ago

The subject also doesn’t notice if you end their consciousness either.

gramie , 2 months ago in [Request] Looking for resources on terrible algorithms, architecture, and design

Sounds like you should look at a few years of thedailywtf.com entries. Enough to make the staunchest man (or woman) weep.

Mesa , 2 months ago

thedailywtf.com/articles/gotta-catch-em-all

Dear God.

<span style="color:#323232;">try
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    /* ... some important code ... */
</span><span style="color:#323232;">} 
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (OutOfMemoryException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (OverflowException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (InvalidCastException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (NullReferenceException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (IndexOutOfRangeException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (ArgumentException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (InvalidOperationException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (XmlException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (IOException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (NotSupportedException exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span><span style="color:#323232;">catch (Exception exception)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">{
</span><span style="color:#323232;">    Global.Insert("App.GetSettings;", exception.Message);
</span><span style="color:#323232;">}
</span>

DivineDev , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

Consciousness and conscience are not the same thing, this naming is horrible

NeatNit , 2 months ago

This just makes it more realistic

Wxnzxn , 2 months ago

Hey, just be glad I changed it from asdf_test_3, okay?

NeatNit , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

I had to turn my phone sideways and go cross-eyed to spot the difference.

pro_grammer , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

The comic sans makes this even deeper

fidodo , 2 months ago

Who the fuck uses comic sans for programming? I use comic mono.

rickyrigatoni , 2 months ago

oh god why is it real

pro_grammer , 2 months ago

damn bro

Excrubulent , 2 months ago

It’s real and I genuinely don’t hate it.

fidodo , 2 months ago

Seriously, I kinda want to use it for my markdown files.

Wolfwood1 , 2 months ago

At least it’s not Comic Sans IN THE IDE (or vim/emacs for the brave).

JustBrian7872 , 2 months ago

Well…uhm

pro_grammer , 2 months ago

Comic sans in vim is peak insanity

Schmoo , 2 months ago in "I want to live forever in AI"

If anyone’s interested in a hard sci-fi show about uploading consciousness they should watch the animated series Pantheon. Not only does the technology feel realistic, but the way it’s created and used by big tech companies is uncomfortably real.

The show got kinda screwed over on advertising and fell to obscurity because of streaming service fuck ups and region locking, and I can’t help but wonder if it’s at least partially because of its harsh criticisms of the tech industry.

localme , 2 months ago

Yes, I just finished watching Pantheon and absolutely loved it!

Totally agree that it deserved more attention. At least it got a proper ending with season 2.

Also, the voice acting talent they got was impressive. Paul Dano was fantastic as one of the leads.

khannie , 2 months ago

Sounds good. Did it come to a conclusion or get axed mid way?

AFaithfulNihilist , 2 months ago

The series has a very satisfying conclusion.

It’s one of the coolest fucking things we watched this last year.

khannie , 2 months ago

Sold!

gerbler , 2 months ago

Unironically the most important question

Schmoo , 2 months ago

Luckily the writers were able to finish it the way they wanted with a second season, and it’s fantastic. AMC almost did axe it before the second season released but after it was already finished but fans were able to get them to release it.

BlackPenguins , 2 months ago

I really thought you were going to mention “Upload” on Prime. Same creator as the office.

LodeMike , 2 months ago

That show is garbage

LodeMike , 2 months ago

The show got kinda screwed over on advertising and fell to obscurity because of streaming service fuck ups and region locking, and I can’t help but wonder if it’s at least partially because of its harsh criticisms of the tech industry.

Okay so I can’t 100% confirm this, but the first season wasn’t popular because it was on whatever the fuck AMC+ is. Amazon bought it because of the writer’s strike to get something out.

GnomeKat , 2 months ago

Just FYI content warning for Pantheon there is a seriously disturbing gore/kill scene that is animated too well in the first season. Anyone who has seen the show knows what scene I am talking about, I found the scene pretty upsetting and I almost didn’t finish the show. I am still a little upset that the scene is burned in my memory.

TheFonz , 2 months ago

Checking in to see if this show was mentioned. Highly recommend! Well written