Someone get working on this, right away!

dipshit , 5 months ago

In a world, one man, older than time immortal. One ocean, with creatures from the deep blue aybss. This summer, experience a heart-warming tale of love, mystery and cold-blooded horror of: Count Flipper.

MeatsOfRage , 5 months ago

Searching “Vampire Dolphin movie” lead me to this wild plot synopsis for a movie called Reflecting Skin

"The film opens with Seth and his friends, Eben and Kim, playing with a frog Seth has found in the fields. The boys inflate the frog by inserting a reed up its anus and leave it by the side of the road. When a local English widow, Dolphin Blue, stops to inspect it, Seth shoots the inflated frog with a slingshot, causing it to explode over Dolphin. "

According to the plot, they suspect Dolphin of being a vampire. So close…

betterdeadthanreddit , 5 months ago

Bat-ten down the hatches this summer for Dracula & Dolphy: Suck and Blow!

M137 , 5 months ago

Dolphula - Dracula played by Dolph Lundgren, humanity has died out so dracula chooses the next species to turn into vampires… dolphins! Obligatory Vampire dolphin orgie scene with Dolph in the middle.

Apeman42 , 5 months ago

Now, here’s the twist, and there is a twist. We show it. We show all of it. Full penetration.

runswithjedi , 5 months ago

deleted_by_author

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

I’ve been waiting to see Drppal Daskap play Dracula for years!

KazuyaDarklight , 5 months ago

Clearly staring Nicholas Cage as Dracula, Ryan Reynolds voices the dolphin.

UnderpantsWeevil , 5 months ago

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/c7950342-d4b0-4c17-8172-8f58ff2e06a2.png

And this sequel

Kowowow , 5 months ago

One thing that comes up in the original book is dracula is apparently a really good cook but in some lore the can’t really eat food so I like the idea of dracula learning to cook then just tossing out the rest of the dish once he’s satisfied

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/d9f38918-b038-42bb-a5f7-e7a5486f6051.png

watersnipje , 5 months ago

What kind of monster stacks pizzas like that?!

jaschen , 5 months ago

Lasagna pizza

EdibleFriend , 5 months ago

A vampire.

makeshiftreaper , 5 months ago

That doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Firstly an aristocrat in the late 1800s, especially one who had been around for a long time, would not cook their own food, that’s servant work. Secondly, vampires don’t generally gain sustenance from food, so why would he care? Finally, if this dude can’t eat garlic I question his ability to make tasty food

Kowowow , 5 months ago

I think it was a a curry but I could be totally since it’s been a while and at that point in the book he was telling johnathan that he lived alone so he at least wanted him to believe that he cooked it

makeshiftreaper , 5 months ago

I’ve only seen the 1931 movie but didn’t he have Renfield as a servant? Plus he had help when he traveled from Transylvania to London. So it still doesn’t make sense to me

Kowowow , 5 months ago

I’m pretty sure renfield doesn’t show up till london as he’s in a psych ward there and it was johnathon’s job to set up the buying of a heart plus the trip to london

logicbomb , 5 months ago

Vampires can’t cross running water, and they don’t seem to do well on the ocean, either. Their options for meeting dolphins are relatively limited.

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

You just lack imagination! Dolphracula is going to be the next Barbenheimer!

Etterra , 5 months ago

Vampire dolphins?

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

Now we’re talking!

PlasmaDistortion , 5 months ago

This is only logical conclusion.

sbv , 5 months ago

volphins, if you will

smuuthbrane , 5 months ago

TBH this sounds like something that Hotel Transylvania VII would cover when the family decides to go on a vacation to Atlantis and Drac somehow ends up with Neptune’s trident and commands all the ocean animals.

And naturally, starts and undersea monster hotel.

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

Don’t cheapen the Dracula/dolphin idea like that.

smuuthbrane , 5 months ago

I know everyone is hoping for a “Free Willie” moment instead, but with the risk tolerance in Hollywood these days we’d be lucky to get HTVII.

originalucifer , 5 months ago

o0o i know... vampire falls into ocean where its saved, and subsequently raped by a dolphin. this turns the dolphin into a vampire where they both die the next morning when the sun rises and theres no shade anywhere. the end.

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

Someone call A24!

originalucifer , 5 months ago

o0o0 alt ending!

:: vampire and vampire dolphin dont die, because now they dont need to breathe, they can swim to the bottom of the ocean and live happily ever after in the depths!

betterdeadthanreddit , 5 months ago (edited 5 months ago)

What’s the aquatic equivalent of a bat? Maybe vampire dolphin could transform into a school of smaller fish at will to squeeze through tight spaces or evade threats.

Vampire hunters could show up with cross-shaped wooden harpoons, holy water depth charges, garlic oil hoses and all kinds of other nautical twists on the usual weapons.

originalucifer , 5 months ago

o0o0 i love the idea of dolphin vampire turning into something... eels?

FlyingSquid OP , 5 months ago

What’s the aquatic equivalent of a bat?

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/3d92bef1-3141-4511-8725-c2cdf3dc2bcb.png