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lemmyshitpost

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abbadon420 , in Poop Size: Mega!

Did you know that you don’t actually have to poop every time you take a phone-break on the toilet?

Viking_Hippie ,

Why would you lie on the internet?

MyFairJulia OP ,
@MyFairJulia@lemmy.world avatar

Oh no, i take phone breaks between my shits. Usually when i’m shitting i’m figuring out solutions to the worlds problems, disproving well established theorems and stuff. However when i’m done shitting i keep forgetting the solutions so here we are.

plumbus , in I'm not the one making the rules

I was confused at first, as this is what real Mozzarella looks like.

this

machinaeZER0 ,

To shreds, you say?

Viking_Hippie ,

Shred her? I hardly ate her!

poggerino , in How journalist view modern gamers

I personally love being “overly competitive” in games. I want a mode of the game to do that in. That’s why I play ranked mode in league, where ARAM and Normal games are for the forfun players.

shotgun_ninja ,

Same. I like that League has the options for both. There’s a lot I dislike, but I’m also a glutton for punishment.

sagrotan , in Pooping only every 3 or more days linked with cognitive decline, research finds
@sagrotan@lemmy.world avatar

When that burrito plug came loose, my brain started working again in bliss. I believe!

Pinklink , in Pisspost

Piss……in my ass?

SSUPII OP ,

There is some room to countain a little

Default_Defect , in Pooping only every 3 or more days linked with cognitive decline, research finds
@Default_Defect@lemmy.world avatar

Thanks to my anti-rejection meds (or one of the other meds I take along with them) my poop has been easy peasy. Like soft serve.

misterundercoat , in it was a waste of time

A keyboard. How quaint.

– Montgomery Scott, 1986

FlyingSquid , in Do you see a problem?
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

Well, my “son” is a girl both biologically and in terms of gender, so I guess that’s correct?

Viking_Hippie , in Disappointed by the Barbie Movie

At least it wasn’t about Klaus Barbie 😬

BzzBiotch OP ,
@BzzBiotch@lemmy.world avatar

That would have made a whole other movie! 😆

Viking_Hippie ,

And how! 😄

BzzBiotch OP ,
@BzzBiotch@lemmy.world avatar

What if herr Klaus was Barbie’s real father and Barbie had to invent Barbieworld and her alter ego perfectly happy girl to escape from the abuse from her father and all the horrible things she must have seen and heard during his career in the SS.

Aceticon ,

It would’ve been quite the plot twist when it was revealed that Barbieworld was all an insane fantasy world totally in her head and in real world she was catatonic in an insane asylum whilst in her mind she lived inside that fantasy.

BzzBiotch OP ,
@BzzBiotch@lemmy.world avatar

Barbie: Melancholia

tomi000 ,

Tell me youre German without saying youre German

Viking_Hippie ,

Actually Danish. You don’t actually have to be German (or a nazi) to know about prominent nazis, you know…

n3cr0 , in Do you see a problem?
MegaTony , in Pooping only every 3 or more days linked with cognitive decline, research finds

Shitpost taken literally

MilitantAtheist , in How journalist view modern gamers

Welcome to Tarkov

Deepus , in it was a waste of time

When I was young my mum n dad used to force me to do a hour of writing everyday after school to improve my writing, never worked, and now I work in IT so have almost zero reason for a pen or pencil. What a waste of time. Good job I was unsupervised and only used to do it once a week then give them the same sheet every day!

Delphia , in My grandson just showed me the funniest cartoon

I absolutely loved Garfield as a kid, as an adult I learned that Jim Davis created him just to be a vehicle for merch.

Show the kid Calvin and Hobbes.

CYCLR ,

There was a subreddit that only posted this comic over and over, with similar captions. I think that’s the joke here lol

robocall , in Disappointed by the Barbie Movie
@robocall@lemmy.world avatar

Astroid city has multiple nuclear explosions

BzzBiotch OP ,
@BzzBiotch@lemmy.world avatar

But not kenough Barbies

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