Do you post about other stuff you don’t have or is it just children? Like do you post in different gaming consoles communities to say you don’t have that console.
I’m not arguing with the fact you don’t have children, I’m all for it, in fact. You should live life the way you want as long as it doesn’t harm others mentally or physically.
But an entire community dedicated to not having something screams that you’re not ok with this that it needs to be spoken about to be reassured, that it takes up more of your brain than not having other things would take up.
I guess what I’m trying to say is I don’t understand the reason this community exists?
Why do you go into other communities to complain about someone’s posts? An entire condescending post dedicated to complaining about something that has zero effect on your life - why bother? You could just ignore it, or even downvote it, and then just move on.
Having or not having children is a significant life decision. Maybe people want to talk about it? That’s why this community exists.
It exists because people are constantly flooded by a torrent of pressure to have children by society, and this is a place for a little catharsis and relief. Relief that there are a small number of people that won’t pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do. It’s a place for like-minded people to blow off steam.
I don’t personally come to this or similar communities, even though I don’t plan on having kids. I understand why it exists though.
For one, there’s a “community” that goes nuts over you not having something and will interject every time they get a chance even when unprompted and continuously question your decision and try to sway you another way.
Having a place to go to vent or talk is pretty nice when you have to deal with those individuals especially when many are surrounded by them and are made to feel “not normal” for it.
There’s a community for everything, it’s kind of the point of the internet, to be able to connect with like minded individuals.
Why do communities exist for - to pick an example - atheists? In lots of parts of the world, there is huge social pressure to conform to a specific religion. If you decide not to, or leave the religion, or have questions, it can be a terrifying and lonely experience.
It’s the same here. Lots of us feel huge pressure from family, friends, co-workers, and society to do something that we don’t want to do. So it is nice to have a community where we can discuss that and reassure each other. Because it is difficult to do what is right when everyone is telling you you’re wrong.
Must admit, I didn’t see it from this angle. Perhaps because of my personal experience in life and the few people in my social circle have never been pressured into having kids, it’s just not really been a thing in my 40 odd years on the planet. Perhaps cultural differences etc, either way adjusting my view point to be that of people constantly being pressured to have kids when they don’t want kids/can’t have kids allows me to understand the community’s existence.
Social conditioning plays big role. Of course there are people who genuinely want become parents. But majority of people think that having a child is an inevitable stage in human life. Because of social pressure most people don’t realize that parenthood is a choice. That you can freely say NO to having a baby and nothing will happen. Life will go on, the God won’t punish you, skies won’t fall on your head.
Noisy pestilent stupid destructive little goblins that demands your attention, resources and sleep lest they die. And should the child grow up to be dysfunctional shithead you are to blame. And should you recognize that you can't raise the child and give up for adoption, society brands you a failure and possibly induce massive trauma on the child.
But as my friend says: "they are cute while they're sleeping"
I'll attempt a real answer. I don't hate kids or the parents of kids who care for them and raise them to be good people.
I hate that societal pressures place having kids at the near top of life's implicit goals. I hate that my wife and I almost had kids because of these pressures, when neither of us really wanted it. And if it weren't for one (slightly older than us) couple we were friends with sharing that they were childfree, we would be there, and likely unhappy about it. So we speak out, not out of hate, but just to provide the other side, it ok to have kids... It's ok to not, it's a choice.
Totally fair. Societal pressure is something to completely ignore though. Everyone doing the ‘pressuring’ can go fuck right off.
I have a kid. Second one on the way. I also don’t like kids. None of them. I tolerate mine. I mean, I do all the good parenty things and stuff, but I can’t wait for them to grow into adults.
That’s the whole reason I want kids. Not because I want kids. But because I want adults I can call my children. Frankly, I don’t know why, I just know I do. And I’m prepared to make the endless sacrifices that come with it. And I totally understand other people who don’t want to do it.
Also, I hope to be able to raise some decent humans. The world can use those. It seems like assholes are breeding like crazy. I hope to offset that a little.
I don’t hate kids, but it would be a horrific nightmare for everyone involved if I had some of my own. Never wanted them, never will. I do adore my niece.
it’s okay to not want them, but calling them “shitty fucking kids” or “crotch goblins” or other stupid names is a different matter and only reflects badly on the person who says these things
I’m can usually have 2-3 drinks and be fine… but if I get caught up with friends and go over that, yeah I sleep like absolute shit. I won’t even be hung over (I drink a ton of water, hydrate while consuming alcohol!!) but I still sleep awful.
What did you hope to accomplish, publishing this comment in a community explicitly for child-free people? Did you think I was going to have a come to Jesus moment and turn my life around and become a parent because you posted this?
Just got laid off from work. I’d be fucked if I had kids to feed now. Luckily I don’t and also enough savings to live off for two years if I had to. This is exactly the kind of stuff I don’t want that responsibility for.
Oh I’ll be fine. I’m a union member so my finances are covered no matter if I find a new job or not. I might even start my own company now that I have a good chance.
This worked for me. I joined a meetup board gaming group and became close friends with the host. We were both single at the time, now we are both in relationships and child free and regularly get together to play games. It's been great.
child free adult here: we are few, but we exist. personally i don’t expect friendship from people with children, or it would be as shallow as heck. lonely? i agree. but thats the price to be paid for not being part of the crowd.
Table top RPGS, board games, poker/card game groups, baking, cycling, volunteering at an org you feel strongly about, trail building to add to the list. As mad as I am at Reddit this would be the perfect thing to scour your local subreddit for groups for.
I actually got more involved with the kink community events. People who have healthy sex lives often don’t have children, because they want to keep things spicy. Yeah, there’s a good handful of parents, but these are the people that realize that children can interfere with living, and they’ve all been super respectful (or openly envious) of my childfree choice. Getting my fallopian tubes yeeted was the best decision ever.
kids only benefit corps: they want human labor, they can create gmo kids and raise them on their expense, else a baby trashes his mother’s body, and a financial burden for the dad only to benefit corps. also noisy and uncontrollable, and personally i hate when things are out of my control.
childfree
Oldest
This magazine is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.