Be honest: have you ever lost your temper with a customer service rep? And did it ever help?

KoboldCoterie , 3 hours ago

I’ve definitely gotten angry about a situation while on the phone with a customer service rep, but not with the rep themself. I make it a point any time I’m audibly angry when on the phone to state that I’m angry at the company, not at the person I’m speaking with, and that I understand that it’s not their fault. It seems to help a lot; I used to work in customer service and I sure appreciated it when people made that distinction to me. It’s okay to be upset, just don’t take it out on a CSR.

1stTime4MeInMCU , 3 hours ago

Honestly this is pretty much it. Sometimes you have to be pretty aggressive to get companies to do the thing you need; they will take advantage of the social friction required to keep you in predatory arrangements. They literally design it to be frustrating so you’ll give up. Like you, I try to make it clear to the person I’m speaking with I have no problem with them just the business. But if the corporations require me to get mad to do the right thing I will get mad.

corsicanguppy , 35 minutes ago

I have a friend whose family immigrated to Fiji from India before coming here. He’s bi-cultural, and his super-power comes from his heritage.

Also, he will wait on the phone and talk to as many reps as required in order to get a discount. In CANADA, his full-up TV package - sports, streaming, movies, 1gbps internet, etc - is $1 for the next 2 years. Then he’ll call again and bring up the days where things didn’t work, mention how this is a consistent pattern they promised to eliminate, and launder all that into another 2 years just so they can be rid of him. He outlasts them.

Ceedoestrees , 2 hours ago

In person at an apple store.

I bought an iphone used off a friend who stopped being my friend immediately after. I never wanted an apple product, but my phone broke, I was poor and he sold it to me for $50.

I didn’t know you needed the apple id and password to SIGN OUT of anything. I sent him messages, did the whole “click here to request a new password” thing so he would get an e-mail about it…to his apple e-mail which, let’s be honest, no one uses.

Not being able to use the full functionality sucked, but I could manage. What was worse was receiving pictures and messages intended for him.

I did what any sane person would do and brought it to the apple store. The first person who helped me repeated “Our security systems protect your privacy” so many times, no matter what I said, I lost my shit, shouted “I would like to sign out so I can stop seeing nudes of this guy’s girlfriend!”

They didn’t help and I bought an android.

jewbacca117 , 2 hours ago

iphones are decent devices from a security standpoint, but useless if someone is still signed in. Your former friend sold you a $50 brick

Ceedoestrees , 1 hour ago

It still worked as a phone.

Calling features “Security” when they significantly reduce the secondary market is a convenient way to increase profits.

corsicanguppy , 41 minutes ago

given Apple’s primary goal is “more things sold”, this is completely on-brand. Better, worse, secure, not; whatever the phones are or are not, every effort goes back to “more things sold”.

kambusha , 1 hour ago

N is for NIGHTMARE

kambusha , 1 hour ago

and, for closure

tuckerm , 1 hour ago (edited 57 minutes ago)

I'm certainly close right now. I bought a laptop from System76 in December (the Pangolin). It has not, any any point, worked acceptably. First the USB ports would frequently disconnect and reconnect. Then the trackpad started freaking out, registering constant false clicks and not letting the cursor move.

The first time I sent it in, they shipped me back someone else's computer.

When I did get my own laptop back, I found that the trackpad issue hadn't been fixed. Then it stopped waking up after being suspended.

So I sent it in again, and got no updates from them for 30 days. They said their usual turnaround time was 7-10 days. And the first time I sent it in, it took them about a week to send it back. Well, to send a computer back. So something was wrong here.

On top of that, the support ticket has a "Last Updated" timestamp, and it kept changing every couple of days. I asked them for details, and only received generic "sorry this is taking a while, we're working on it" responses. I specifically wanted to know why the "last updated" timestamp was changing every few days, because of course I'm imagining that they've shipped my computer to someone else.

I finally responded in all caps, asking where my computer was for that unexplained month, and why the timestamp kept changing. The support agent replied:

Your computer was at our warehouse waiting to be worked on.

Bless up,

(Support agent name)

Bless up? Fucking asshole.

I always want to be patient with those working in customer support. It's difficult and often thankless job. I know how unfair it is when a customer blows up at someone in customer service, not to mention how unhelpful it is. And usually the customer is yelling at someone with no power to fix the situation. But this System76 thing is getting ridiculous. They're literally just not responding to emails and dodging questions when they do respond.

Extrasvhx9he , 1 hour ago

Honestly yeah not blow up levels of anger more passive aggressive with a hint of sarcasm when I was talking to them instead. It happened when I tried getting help at an at&t store to port out my number from at&t prepaid. Yes I know now its not the same branch or something but damn they were rude and at least could’ve told me who to call. Iirc they were watching a sports game so they probably just wanted to rush me out. At&t prepaid’s reps were nice though just thick accents.

nokturne213 , 1 hour ago

Yes. There was a new streaming service that I signed up for. I used an email alias and the confirmation email never arrived. They had no way to change my email address or activate my account except for me clicking the link in my email.

After a month my free trial expired (without me ever being able to log in), they added a second month of free trial while trying to activate my account. This went on for 5 months, finally the 6th month they did not give me another free month and I was charged. Still no solution for the situation. 7th month arrives and I get charged again. The 8th month I lost it. I knew most of the support and customer service reps at this point as I had talked with also all of them multiple times a week for months. But with no solution in sight and being charged for multiple times months I finally lost it on one of the CSRs. Surprisingly while I was on the phone with them they were able to cancel my account and issue a refund.

BallsandBayonets , 2 hours ago

I had a flat tire at midnight once. Tried for about an hour to change it myself before calling a tow truck company that said it was open. Got routed to a call center who said they had to contact one of their freelance trucks, after paying $250 over the phone. A little more back and forth and about 90 minutes later (when they said it’d be 30 minutes), no truck ever appeared. The call center (third rep that night) called and said the one person they had working tonight broke down outside of cell service, can they come out in the morning? I said that won’t work, I’ll just cancel and get a refund. They said it’d take 3-4 business days to get the refund and there’d be a $50 refund processing charge.

I didn’t quite blow up at them, but any time I have to stand up for myself I get shaky and struggle to keep the anger out of my voice. I explained (several times) that there was no way that was acceptable and that I would like to speak to their manager. “I spoke to my manager and there’s nothing we can do, that’s just the cost of processing a refund.” Well I paid for services that I didn’t receive, due to no fault of my own. Let me speak to your manager. Another hold. “My manager is willing to pay the refund himself this one time.” Yeah ok sure thanks bye.

20 minutes later my tire was changed by a different tow truck company who had a real employee answer before the second ring, had multiple trucks on duty, didn’t even ask for payment until after the work was done, and it was about $80. I fully expected to have to issue a chargeback for the first company’s charge but fortunately it never showed up on my card statement.

odelik , 1 hour ago

This is what charge backs are for FYI.

“I’m sorry, but you failed to provide a service. Either give me a full refund or I will start the charge back process with my credit card company and you’ll be forced to explain why your refund policy violates their ToS and any penalties that arise from that process.”

NauticalNoodle , 2 hours ago

Define “help” I’ve blown up on unsolicited cold-callers like military recruiters, and political campaign fundraisers multiple times and it helped me feel better. If I’m calling for support then I’m already vulnerable and blowing up is like biting the hand that feeds so no, that doesn’t help. Power dynamics matter when taking your anger out on others. Self control matters so you don’t have to

Vanth , 3 hours ago

I just ask for the next tier of support.

Lots of tier 1 support aren’t even armed to do much troubleshooting. They are there to enter tickets and to advise the cookie cutter “have you tried turning it off and on again” type answers and to give scripted explanations of known outages or bugs. More advanced troubleshooting gets done by higher tiers.

In your case, I would ask for a rep to be assigned your case number and get their phone number so you have one point of contact. Whether they actually do that for you is another matter, some companies put very little emphasis on customer service and support once you’re already a paid customer.

_pete_ OP , 3 hours ago

This had already gone past the first level “customer service” level to the 2nd level “technical support” team who sat on it for a couple of weeks, they’ve apparently now escalated it again and they’re waiting for their “network team” to take a look at it.

I’ve basically lost all hope with them at this point.

BombOmOm , 3 hours ago

It might be worth switching providers. Starlink and 4G ISPs (TMobile, Verison) are surprisingly good.

memfree , 2 hours ago

If you are willing to switch, tell your current carrier and sometimes that will light a fire under them to actually address the Support call. We had that happen recently. Internet went out. The issue was outside our house with the provider’s line. They said they’d send someone a week later, so we pointed out it would be faster for us to switch providers, to which they replied, “We can’t get there tomorrow but how about the next day?” We accepted and they actually did fix it in two days instead of seven.

_pete_ OP , 2 hours ago

I’m in the UK, we have a system for switching ISPs that is apparently relatively painless so I’ve started that process but it’s apparently going to be another 2 weeks before the switch can happen :(

ZagamTheVile , 2 hours ago

I did. Back in the old days we had phones connected to wires called land lines. The phones were controlled by shitty companies similar to cell service providers or cable companies (almost as archaic as land lines).

I was having trouble getting my land line up and running after a move. A bad day at work, money trouble, and a phone that still wouldn’t work, set me off. I totally lost my shit on a poor, under paid rep. I mean, I went off. It was brutal. I think I made her cry. The people in the room I was in (rental office at the new apartment complex) all left the room.

After a solid 2 or 3 minutes of me just ripping into this innocent person, I caught myself. I realized what I was doing mid-rant and just stopped. I sort of gasped and said “oh god. What the fuck is wrong with me?” or something similar out loud. I spent the next couple of minutes apologizing and telling this person how big a shit head I was being. I admitted that I had crossed a line, commended them on their professionalism, and took full responsibility for making this their problem when it clearly wasn’t. I was sincere and I was honest. I told her that she should hang up on me and make a note in my file that I’m a problem. I also said that I’d never yell at a rep like that again. And humbly asked if ther was anything she could do to help me. She did. She solved whatever bullshit problem there was and was so rad to me.

She went so far above and beyond after I treated her like shit. That was close to 30 years ago and I still have never even raised my voice to a rep since. As bad as some places are, as poorly trained as some reps are, even as shitty as some reps are, I’ll never forget how rotten a person I was in that moment. I don’t want to be like that. That’s not the kind of world I want to live in. And frankly, fuck a dude that would talk to me like that.

comfyquaker , 2 hours ago

Yep, but i felt really bad afterwards. Purchased tickets on American airlines on short notice due to the death of my wife’s close aunt. The trip had a connecting flight and our first flight got delayed by an hour (np plenty of layover time left). then when we land the plane taxied for over an hour giving us about 10 panicking minutes to make the connection, but if we ran we could make it.

we didn’t, The terminal was much farther than expected. in the rush, my wife lost her ID, which added to further frustration. maintaining decent composure up until we go to the AA desk to schedule our alternative flight. The flight we were supposed to go on was the last flight for the day. and the next one wasn’t until next day evening.

well that was not going to work because the funeral was in the morning. We asked if we could fly to another city (equidistant to rural home) but the clerk was really firm on that the flight had to be to my destination. after all, our bags made it there.

that was what cocked the hammer back for me. I asked to speak with someone higher and they gave me a number, and boom i was pretty irked and very rude to the service rep who had the patience of a saint. She did get us on the soonest flight to the other city. My wife was crying with relief and i was sobbing my gratitude and apologizing for my behavior. the Service rep brushed it off like it was business as usual and tells me to have a nice flight.

Aside from having to go purchase new clothes at 1am, we made it to the service a few hours later.

MentalEdge , 2 hours ago

There’ve been a couple times. I make a distinction between frustration at the company and the person, but sometimes you run into reps that are willfully unhelpful or actively malicious for their own gain.

Two cases come to mind. I’ve had an ISP rep call me about updated prices, who then proceeded to try and sell me a broadband and streaming bundle subscription. I would have gotten a slightly faster speed, plus the streaming BS. Same price as I was already paying.

I specifically asked if unbundled contracts had also been changed, and the dude said “no”. I checked the prices online while still on the call, and the bastard was straight up lying. Without the streaming bundled, the price was lower and came with even more speed. I told him this, and he asked “oh do you want that then?”. I replied “yes, but not if it gives you a sales bonus”, so I hung up and signed up for the new contract via the ISP website.

In the other case I was shopping for jeans, and the store rep repeatedly handed me elastane-ridden skinny jeans a few sizes too small, insisting they’d look better, even as I kept telling him the exact size I wanted, and that I preferred the 100% cotton denim, loose fit jeans. At the fourth pair of skinny jeans I told him to fuck off, and just went through the store myself until I found what I was looking for.

MadBob , 3 hours ago

Once I decided to end my contract with Virgin Media and they kept asking me why I was leaving, so I kept saying I didn’t want to explain, I’d just cancel (because I knew they’d do their best to talk me around) and it got to the point where I became firm, but I didn’t shout, though I wanted to.

Tangentially related: after I’d signed up to the Telephone Preference Service, I knew that the only people ringing me to sell stuff were doing so illegally, so if they persisted after I’d made that point, I used to just verbally abuse them. Right cathartic.

theshatterstone54 , 2 hours ago

Similar story. The only way we could finally end it is if we paid 1 month at the high price (it was a promotional contract, 20-something quid for 100 mbps or so they claimed; it became 40+ after that).

eezeebee , 2 hours ago

Yes I have, and no it does not help. Always apologize and tell them it’s the situation, not them, that you are upset with.

I’ve done that job before and most likely they would help you if they could, but the company won’t train them or make any solutions available because it costs money. Your impression that they don’t know what they’re talking about is probably accurate.

Your best bet is to keep escalating to a higher department (“manager”, “office of the president”).

ByteOnBikes , 3 hours ago

Yes. More than I care to admit. No. It never helped.

It’s even worse today, where the front line support starts with a defensive attitude now.

I’ve tried a bunch of different strategies. But as Im now in my 40s, I’ve learned that you always get better service with honey.

I started doing that Gen Z stuff of like, “Hey man. You are probably just doing what you need to do, and I’m hoping my issue is easy as fuck to solve. If not, I’m not here to give you trouble because the system sucks.”

There’s a great book called Verbal Judo which goes through how to deal with the suck. Its not for everyone. But for people like me who tend to blow up easily, it’s great for keeping your composure, getting to a solution without ruining your day (even if it isn’t what you want), and remembering the person behind the screen/phone is human.