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What would you do if a scraggly homeless person knocked on your door, and all he asked was for a sandwich, a bottle of water, a bath, and perhaps a beard trim?

I’ve actually skipped work just to help a homeless guy get his beard trimmed. Bought him pizza too. Kinda hard to get anywhere in life when you look like shit.

Be kind to the homeless, they just need a helping hand here and there.

What would you do?

tobogganablaze ,

Can’t hear knocking on the door from the living room and my doorbell is disabled most of the time. So unless people notfify me of their visit there is a good chance I just won’t open the door at all.

Also there is a big construction site in front of my house right now, so I’m wearing noise canceling headphone most of the time. And with those I hardly even hear the doorbell when it’s on.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

I’m not a hairdresser and wouldn’t have confidence trimming a guy’s beard. Other than that, I’d let him in, get to know him a little, maybe give him a salad with water, and yeah the shower would be on the house, you think I’d charge for a scent cleanse using Earth’s most abundant resource? I just hope he brought clothes, unless he doesn’t mind wearing women’s clothes.

can ,

Man, I’m so glad I already tagged you as a PoS

over_clox OP ,

Meh, I just put the 3/8" guard on the clippers and simply trimmed him down. Easy enough when you’re not going for any style at all except short hair.

Redredme ,

Hell no.

Are you u all living in rosy mc Rosewood Santa’s little safe harbour everything is fine and dandy rainbow world? Or are you all lying through your teeth?

Letting someone in your home with clearly visible psychological issues, in your circle of trust, filled with those you hold most dearly and packed with your dearest memories, that place… And then letting someone in you know nothing about?

Hell fucking no.

In the real world letting some rando homeless dude in your home has a 50/50 chance of ending up in crazy town. There is a high probability that you, yours or your stuff get fucked up. I cannot and will not accept those odds. Even a 2% chance of shit happening is a risk I’m unwilling to take when it comes to my kids.

Would I help him? Maybe. It depends on some factors (like can I at that specific time, did I help him out earlier, do I have cash on hand) Would I let him in? No f-ing way.

So real answer: money: maybe, eat & drink: anytime. Clothes: I’ve got some you can have, no problem. Bath and clean: nope. Never.

M500 ,

This is my thought as well. Even if things go well this time, who’s to say they will not feel entitled to come back. Maybe with or without your knowledge.

I’d send them away otherwise I might start getting a regular visitor to my house asking for stuff.

In public, I’m happy to give money or food.

EABOD25 , (edited )

While I do agree with you. Your wording could be a little bit better. You seem like a glass half empty kind of person, and I can respect that. However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation. Mental health problems come in all shapes and sizes

Haui ,
@Haui@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

As someone with diagnosed mental health issues, I can tell you that I mean no harm. But sadly, the pure difference in perception paired with unfamiliarity of the two parties makes the situation insanely dangerous, not the person.

You never know why the person is in this predicament and if they have a tendency towards violence, robbery or other things. I‘m not saying they are. I‘m saying you have to assume they are before making that decision. Can you defend yourself against a pulled knife or even gun, do you have enough mental capacity to observe them at all times. Those odds do not look good.

So, although I would never willingly look down on folks less fortunate than myself. I too will never ever let a stranger into my house if they raise any concerns.

EABOD25 ,

Very better wording. Sorry if I was seeming like a dick. I’ve always had the view that people generally mean no harm, but might have articulated it in the wrong way. I’m definitely trying to work on that with myself as well. I also have mental health issues, and I was homeless for a good 2 years of my life, and would have been longer if a person didn’t invite a scruffy person into their home and show them goodness and ask for nothing in return.

After I typed that, I had to think about it for a bit. I was probably one of the few lucky ones. I’ve had the experience working in movie theaters, and I’ve encountered many homeless and have had good and bad experiences. The bad is more memorable (which probably says more about human nature rather than social conception at this point), but had many great experiences with homeless people. I have stories, but I’ll save them for the sake of typing a shit ton lol.

TL;DR: I like the cut of your jib, you seem very intelligent, and have good points. However, I still believe the whole argument comes down to pessimis vs optimism. I’m a very long winded person, so tldr are hard for me

over_clox OP ,

“if they raise any concerns”

Yes indeed, those words sum it up pretty well. Everybody is different. Every situation is different.

Everyone deserves a chance though, with caution of course…

Ledivin ,

However your statement makes it seem like all homeless people have some kind of dangerous psychological issues, and that is a wild accusation.

He never said anything like this, and specifically called out pretty low probabilities throughout his comment.

EABOD25 ,

I hate linking comments. Sorry, but it took me a bit to type all of that up. So I beg your pardon

lemm.ee/comment/13208280

over_clox OP ,

Thank you for your opinion, every individual is different. Homeless does not inherently equate to psychological issues nor drug addiction.

Sometimes people just had their house destroyed from a hurricane or tornado or whatever, and insurance done fucked them over, if they even had proper insurance in the first place.

Sorry you’re getting downvoted, but you got my upvote. Thank you for having enough of a mind and soul to care. 🤗👍

atro_city ,

If I had time, I'd maybe tell the dude to wait outside, then get my loafers, walk with him to the shop and buy a meal. Strangers in my house? No thank you. Good way to get robbed in my neighborhood.

There are free showers and halfway houses around here, so getting shower wouldn't be a reason to knock on the door, I think.

Optimally, we should be housing everybody as its been proven time and time again how much cheaper it is than leaving people homeless. It's what I vote for every time, but somehow people are just too selfish.

Akasazh ,
@Akasazh@feddit.nl avatar

Nice try, you filthy Hobo!

stopit ,
@stopit@lemmy.ml avatar

The food and water part, no problem. Strangers in my apartment is a hard no! Sorry.

Vanth , (edited )
@Vanth@reddthat.com avatar

deleted_by_author

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    fine_sandy_bottom ,

    100% this.

    I was a volunteer treasurer at a youth homeless shelter.

    Sadly, it’s not possible to evaluate someone’s intentions when they knock on your door and ask for a sandwich. They might truly just want a sandwich, or they might have other intentions entirely.

    over_clox OP ,

    It’s not typically the person that knocks that you gotta worry about, it’s the person that doesn’t knock that you really gotta worry about.

    ColeSloth ,

    That’s not very true, unfortunately. Knocking allows someone to somewhat figure out if anyone is home, allows a person to gauge who is home (a man or a woman) and how easily the knocker can gauge overtaking them. Breaking in means the homeowner may have time to get a weapon and means the knocker will have to search for anyone home.

    Getting them to come up to the door and see if they’re armed makes it easy if a person is looking for a victim. People just breaking in are usually hoping no one is home and just wants to rob the place.

    over_clox OP ,

    I guess it partly depends how far out in the woods you live. The dogs will announce an intruder before they even get 100 feet close to your home, and I had my cats trained to knock on the door knocker, when they weren’t out eating rats anyways…

    Vanth , (edited )
    @Vanth@reddthat.com avatar

    deleted_by_author

    •
    over_clox OP ,

    You should never assume any stranger is safe. But take each person’s situation separately, some struggling people are actually legitimately honest.

    Vanth , (edited )
    @Vanth@reddthat.com avatar

    deleted_by_author

    •
    over_clox OP ,

    Honestly, the fella I helped didn’t even knock on my door, I knocked on his ‘door’, while he was resting at a local bus stop.

    I had already known the fella for a few months in passing on my bicycle rides. I realized he was a good decent honest person, but he needed a haircut and beard trim.

    Well, I happened to have trimmers, and figured that was the least I could do to try to help him out. That, and a pizza and a beer, just because…

    Edit: Yes, I went out of my way to help this particular fella, he didn’t actually knock on my door. But, what if it was 120⁰F outside, and some stranger knocked on your door asking for help?..

    over_clox OP ,

    Our local cities have been shutting down homeless assistance and food banks. Even the churches aren’t allowed to help anymore… ☹️😭

    BaroqueInMind ,

    Warn them that they are trespassing, call the cops, and then wait hours for one to arrive and either remove the filth or shoot it since it would take a high level of mental illness and/or nefarious motives to approach a strangers home and demand shit.

    LesserAbe ,

    Woah dude. I’m with everyone else saying they’re not letting a stranger in their house. Calling them filth and talking about shooting them is psycho shit

    BaroqueInMind ,

    I’m not shooting anyone, the cops are.

    can ,

    Like they said, psycho

    frauddogg , (edited )
    @frauddogg@lemmygrad.ml avatar

    “Lemme just call the local lynch mob”-assed cracker istg you STAY finding ways to abjectly disgust me and wish for the collapse of our society. YIMBY-assed cracker istg.

    can ,

    He’s a psycho, I’ve already tagged him as such.

    frauddogg ,
    @frauddogg@lemmygrad.ml avatar

    Another bloodthirsty ghoul hit from BaroqueInMind of seven different modlog pages…

    Nemo ,

    Depends if I know them. There’s been a permanent camp around the corner from my house the last five years. My wife and I know a lot of the long-term residents and have helped them do laundry, charge phones, and file taxes. But a stranger? I’d direct them towards other local resources.

    toynbee , (edited )

    File taxes? I admit I’m fairly ignorant of the plights of any unhoused person … And any complex tax situation, TBH … but it seems like most of them would be under the income threshold that would require filing of taxes.

    edit: s/and/any/

    alnitak ,

    Homeless does not necessarily mean jobless. You still have to file taxes if you want a tax return. It’s a lot cheaper to live out of a car and have a PO box than it is to get an apartment.

    toynbee ,

    Fair enough, I hadn’t considered homelessness by choice.

    I know homeless people can and sometimes do have jobs, but assumed their income would be insufficient to require interacting with the IRS. Thank you for expanding my perception.

    Nemo ,

    You remember a few years back when stimulus cheques were being sent out? They were only being sent to those who filed taxes.

    toynbee ,

    Gotcha, thank you.

    BEWARE ,

    No. You stay out.

    andrewta ,

    Food? OK

    Water? OK

    The rest? No.

    HobbitFoot ,

    Yeah. I don’t like people in my place.

    wuphysics87 ,

    Several years ago, my mom started making care for folks out on the street. Some water, a bag of chips, a piece of candy. Little things like that. I started doing the same thing. It’s good to help those down on their luck in small ways. Even to to look at them and say “no, I’m sorry” when they ask for money, rather than to just ignore them. You are acknowledging them as a person. If we wish to make a better society, actions speak louder than words.

    I also prefer the term ‘de-housed’ to ‘homeless’. I feel the latter places blame on them rather than the former which places blame on the society which has failed them.

    over_clox OP ,

    I remember a skit by the late George Carlin where he suggested that instead of calling them homeless, that we should call them houseless instead, so yeah I get what you mean there.

    wuphysics87 ,

    Plow the golf courses and cemeteries! Give these folks a place to live!

    over_clox OP ,

    Ah, I see you’re a fan of the late George Carlin as well… 👍

    CorruptedArk ,

    This is the first time I’m hearing plow cemeteries, and I’m not sure I’m on board with that. People usually spend time there to deal with grief and losing a little bit more of a dead loved one would be incredibly painful for a lot of folks

    Fuck golf courses though

    wuphysics87 ,

    It’s a joke from George Carlin. I wouldn’t advocate for plowing old ones (although dead stuff makes fertile soil). Personally, I wouldn’t make new ones, but perhaps a middle ground is to make mausoleums wbere people can be burried vertically.

    CorruptedArk ,

    Fair, never heard that one, but I can agree with not making new ones

    0laura ,
    @0laura@lemmy.world avatar

    I think homeless is more fitting. at least to me, it’s a more emotional/painful word, which is a good thing. being homeless sounds a lot shittier than being dehoused to me.

    wuphysics87 ,

    That’s an interesting point, provided it motivates people to do something about it, rather than assigning a moral failing to the individual. I.e. they deserve it for their sins. In my mind, dehoused elucidates the lack of a basic human need: shelter. There is a solution, especially in the face of the greed of rent seeking.

    Subject6051 ,

    I don’t hold any answers but if you’re reading this comment, I want to know how you take into consideration that if they are asking for money, that money can easily be used for drugs/opioids/other stuff which will hurt them.

    i.e., Do you give them money or do you give them food, a bottle of water or stuff like that?

    BonesOfTheMoon ,

    Just don’t judge what they use money for. It’s not your place to police someone’s habits. Addiction is very hard.

    lightnsfw ,

    A couple years ago some guy at the gas station gave me this long ass spiel about how he wasn’t on drugs (like the whole time it took to fill my tank up he was going on about it) and then asked me for gas money. I was like buddy here’s $20 but if you’re spending this on drugs get some for me too.

    p5yk0t1km1r4ge ,
    @p5yk0t1km1r4ge@lemmy.world avatar

    Given how I don’t let anybody homeless or otherwise in my house if I don’t know them, I’ll probably give them food and water

    Clinicallydepressedpoochie ,

    I’d give him a snack if he was desperate enough to come to my door. Wouldn’t let him inside but might come out to chat with him. Just to be sure they are well enough to carry on. Like, I didn’t have to call for medical assistance or something.

    It’s easy to say no when you’ve never been in that situation. I mean I’ve never been so out of it I’d beg a stranger to groom me but I have been completely on my own with nothing and no one.

    Any homeless person with good intent would know that cold knocking someone and asking to come inside is a bridge too far. So if they were trying that shit they would most likely be competely toasted or having a serious mental episode. Even more likely they are trying to steal your shit.

    I have had a homeless man come up to the door in an icestorm with no shirt on. The guy was soaked in alcohol and I did not feel safe. I did throw him a sweater, coat, and gloves because he could freeze but I was fucking terrified.

    over_clox OP ,

    Thank you on their behalf for at least trying to help keep them warm during hard freezing times.

    over_clox OP ,

    In my case, the ‘stranger’ wasn’t exactly a stranger anymore. Even though I had my own place to live with my family, I’d get tired of the home drama and I’d go ride my bicycle out to wherever my feet decided to pedal that night.

    There were two particular homeless fellas that I’d sometimes stop and shoot the shit with for a couple hours or so. Sometimes they’d even buy me a beer, just to have a friend to talk to.

    I never forgot their generosity. Never. I helped the older fella with a beard trim, some pizza, and a beer in return.

    The younger fella had been an album producer in the past, so I found him a fancy green suit about his size. Dunno if he kept it, but last I heard he actually got him a place in the next city over.

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