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Why western people seldom use "please"?

Hello,

First of all I don’t really get the actual meaning of “please”. I understand it as it used to make a polite request. However I have rarely seen any westerner saying “please” on either Lemmy, Mastodon or IRC. where I live using “please” (मेहरबानी) is used often.

some_guy ,

I use it constantly in the real world. Not on Lemmy. But I consider this to be pretty informal.

I also deliberately say “I beg your pardon,” instead of “Excuse me.” The former is a request. The latter is mostly a demand, at least in the USA the way people behave.

RBWells ,

Con su permisso, or Excuse me please, when I need to move past someone. Yeah it’s a demand but a polite one I think.

ulkesh ,
@ulkesh@beehaw.org avatar

sudo make me a sandwich…please

black0ut ,
@black0ut@pawb.social avatar

Command make not found, but can be installed with apt-get install make.

electric_nan ,

Rusty on my reading of devanagari-- is that pronounced like “meharbaanii”?

kionite231 OP ,

Yes, that’s correct.

Admetus ,

Much more likely they’re saying ‘thanks in advance’ in the original post or otherwise they reply with gratitude for useful replies and answers.

If they don’t, then yes, they’re probably immature, a 14 year old or just a twat.

h3mlocke ,

Congrats.

RBWells ,

Online? No. It comes off as snarky.

In real life, and emails? All the time. Please and thank you.

Aussiemandeus ,
@Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone avatar

In Australia in the aboriginal culture I was raised in, there is no word for please. We never used it growing up

We have a ward for thank you mah,

We say thank you but if you have something and can give it and someone asks you are obliged to provide.

In today’s world this causes many problems with money etc though.

BCsven ,

At a restaurant, or with people you don’t know it is common to use please and thankyou, less common with family, but still done. But online writing, please and thankyou seems uncommon

Alice ,

It’s funny, I was ALWAYS taught to say please growing up, but as an adult I only hear it in more formal settings, or from older folks. I think people realized that tone and body language also show that you’re trying to be pleasant and not bossy, and dropped the habit of saying it.

I’m sure it’s regional, though, and I’m only speaking for one small chunk of the US.

shinigamiookamiryuu ,

And you’re sure your criteria includes Canadians?

Tar_alcaran ,

Or Britain?

Hugh_Jeggs ,

Or anywhere ffs

LordPassionFruit ,

Honestly. I genuinely have to fight to not say please and thank you.

makingStuffForFun ,
@makingStuffForFun@lemmy.ml avatar

Please let me know, how you know, they are westerners?

jbrains ,

I’d like to know where you are expecting to read “please” on Lemmy or Mastodon where it seems not to be commonly used.

stealth_cookies ,

“Please” is used more in verbal or formal communication in English. I wouldn’t typically use it when writing a comment here as online comment sections are considered informal written communication. But I would always say it if I was asking a food service worker for something.

BearOfaTime ,

They do/don’t?

Gonna need a source for this claim.

CrimeDad ,

Gonna need a source for this claim, please.

OsaErisXero ,

They were not asking

CrimeDad ,

Indeed. That’s why I didn’t also add a question mark.

Umbrias ,

Need is directly in opposition to please. This makes your addition an ironic use of please, and not a polite one, which actually fits the ops observation better than the initial comment did.

CrimeDad ,

Maybe in some cases, but in this case the use of “need” is insincere in the first place. A please at the end softens and adds a little bit of humility to what was originally a somewhat hostile response.

southsamurai ,
@southsamurai@sh.itjust.works avatar

There’s rarely a use for it online. It’s used to make a request, and a lot of online discourse is making statements.

Irl, it’s a lot more common

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