Recognizing the difference between complicated and complex. Complexity comes from multiple layers or interconnections. It can be elegant, efficient, sophisticated. Complicated is needlessly confusing. A tangled web. Unfathomable. My relationships are often complicated, but they are seldom complex.
I mention this not to be (very) pedantic or to take shots at the op. Rather, to the question, appropriate specificity, simplifies and improves your life. Remember those complicated relationships? More than half of my arguments started with disagreeing on what ‘it’ is. How many of yours?
Depression is a bitch. I hope you can find some reprieve in other pleasures than imagining not existing somewhere down the line. I have a friend who got shocks and is much happier since. If you have the resources, and many other things failed to help - you might want to look into ECT. But also, yet again - not a doctor. Just saying I saw it actually help someone who had a lot of trouble existing. But also, there are a thousand different constructive roads to take ahead of that point. GL!
There is an Indian TV series (Amazon Prime Original), named Breathe. A father starts killing people who have been listed as organ donors, one by one, until his son gets new lungs.
That strongly depends on the job. If the company has to follow regulations to meet some security posture, wiping the OS (and all the security tools and configuration set up by IT) to put your own favored OS without matching the security requirements could wind up with you getting fired.
As much as I would love to turf windows and jump to Linux I know that internal policy is you will be fired because you are breaking company policy and threatening company certifications and compliance.
Leaving aside the low hanging fruit that is my gender surgeries, the real answer is probably the covid pandemic.
I’ve been pretty resilient most of my life, but I kinda fell apart when covid took away all of my social connections and coping mechanisms. It was the lowest I’ve ever been.
Big sads, do you feel like you gained your network back? Or is it still limping since pre-Covid days? Also, if you believe in these concepts and feel like sharing - do you consider yourself more of an introvert or an extrovert?
Also as a whole, have you found that your social network differs wildly from cis individuals? By that I mean, when I came out I lost a significant chunk of my own. And in living most of what I have now is either reclaimed (reunited in time) or self-gathered (found-family).
I’m a raging extrovert, and aside from workmates, I don’t think I have any cishet people in my regular circles.
I’ve got social circles again now, post covid, but they’re not the same as they were before covid. The local queer community used to have lots of events, and that used to be my connection to queer folks closer to my age, but a lot of that has dried up and then restarted, but now with a younger focus. And whilst I’m happy to be the elder queer who transitioned ages ago, it’s not so great for connecting with folk of my own generation.
But I still have lots of friends from then.
I used to play roller derby, and that’s gone from my life now (too old to start again), but I still love my running, and I’m a parkrun regular, which brings me around lots of people every week.
Work also gives me a lot of my extrovert social outlet needs :)
It takes a few years to really reinvent yourself after a major social inversion. I did okay after ~5 years even with near total isolation. Daily exercise is absolutely vital for the endorphin balance.
That was part of my trouble. I love running, and I got pneumonia (but not covid) right at the beginning of the pandemic, and it took me about a year to recover from that. On top of that, I would regularly run parkrun, and play roller derby, but they both got shut down too.
All coping mechanisms that I lost access to…
It’s all back now, and even though fitness wise, I’m not back where I was, I’m getting closer every day
When I gave up alcohol. Everything got better, although it got real. Learning how to live my life sober was much harder than just putting down the drink. Thank goodness I asked for help.
This is huge, and congratulations. I was talking earlier with my partner about how addiction is a social disease. And how drinking seems like this coming of age event that's intertwined with fun and sex. But there's a lot of people who never can walk away from that space and it's just killing people.
Also people don't see how damaging it is as compared to other addictions. But I legit had a friend who had to move away and live out of a shelter because the drinking was killing them. And they're working two jobs just to make the cut, but they're so much happier and healthier now than they were when they were in active addiction.
I'm glad you got the help you needed and I hope it stays that way. You got this!
I like terrible horror and monster movies. The old Godzilla movies or power rangers or D rate horror trash on netflix. It’s cool because with lower budget, you can see the practical effects and imagine the films through the eyes of the actors.
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