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erp

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erp ,

You may attract python too!

erp ,

Where tomatoes?

erp ,

There is nothing on that seasonal display barge worth 150 dollary-doos. Or is there? What year is it and what’s the inflation rate?

I’m also mildly concerned about the handcuffs in the top-shelf plastic bin.

erp ,

Saw a kid puke in the pool once on a Disney cruise. You shoulda seen those cast members come running in full hazmat suits and shut down the entire deck! A finely tuned machine, like swappin tires at the Indy 500. If Disney ever got into the military-industrial complex they would take over the world. Worth every penny.

erp ,

Please run for congress. Now.

erp ,

It’s just recliner theater, I tell ya!

erp ,

For me it was the guy in slide one with the lil’ sebastian pony tail. Brick man is just the washed up kool-aid man after the royalties ran out and the brain damage kicked it from repeated head trauma (plus diabeetus). Ohh nooo!

erp ,

If you roll an average of 2.37 Cavendish bananas length of duct tape between your index and middle finger, you can make a sticky booger ball that tastes like an olive (or maybe boogers, depending on your pH and relative gastrointestinal ‘transit time’). As a limited time offer it also removes warts!

erp ,

Maybe I’m just physically intimidating, or a braggart, but I always get the full can of soda

The legroom may force me to drink it with my knees above my head, but still, chalk up a win for the common man

erp ,

That hideous alien creature on the wing during a storm? Me. That’s me. I saved 19 bucks on my ticket and got TWO bags of peanuts on standby! The peanuts blew away one by one somewhere over Iowa but I had beef jerky backup, as all responsible travelers do.

That guy stuffed into a 1970’s Samsonite in the unpressurized baggage hold? Also me.

One time I mailed myself through USPS. If it fits it ships flat rate!! It hurt when I got drop-kicked onto a porch though. More emotionally than anything else.

Is everything the worst?

I’m 43, almost 44, years old and went through a bought of alcoholism during the early part of the pandemic. I went through treatment and have been fine since. However, I can’t help but feel that all the news in the last few months is just the worst. Between the AI bullshit, the wars, the effects of capitalism, and the...

erp ,

"Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

erp ,

The figure is somewhere above 0%, but certainly not zero. For example, haven’t you seen the crap blaster 9000 infomercial at 2AM on a Tuesday? You connect that bad boy to a fire hydrant (vendor liability disclaimed), pull the turbo-diesel engine rip cord, and wear a full body bio-hazard suit with air supply (suggested). Not for use with some sets. Batteries not included.

Ahh, sweet memories; sometimes they overflow.

erp ,

Don’t forget the imperial timekeeper, Favious Flav. Yeeeaaah, boyyy!

erp ,

They are referring to the meme about old German toilets having an ‘inspection shelf’ (Flachspüler)

erp ,

I much prefer Dunning-Notice-Krueger. I get a credit collections notice delivered by a guy with a metal-clawed glove. Now with Fedora!

erp ,

You should hear the cries of the memories, right before they are garbage collected. “Wait, I need that!”

“Bring in the logic probe!”

erp ,

Well I’m not this guy so I think I’ll be just fine

erp ,

↑ supply or ↓ demand. As much as it frustrates politicians, these are the only true levers.

Of course, economists have successfully predicted 5 out of the last 3 recessions so who knows. Why don’t you go ask Chat GPT.

erp ,

C++: C with blackjack and 40 year old hookers. Anyway, only the rich can inherit diamonds or something. Or perhaps not, my memory is corrupted. I’m open to any pointers though…

erp ,

And those are real 'mericun quarter pounders mind you. Not those puny imported quarter kilogramers!

erp ,

That Vowels table though…

erp ,

Penis length number in centimeters > inches.

erp ,

Nice 60" rims bro. Just need some Carolina squat + some spinners and you’ll be cruisin’ the strip.

erp ,

You see, this is just all a big misunderstanding. Some keys on their keyboard got worn out and they thought they were typing homophonic.

erp ,

Ahhhhhhhhh yes, the breaking point, a fine California Champagne by Paul Masson.

Breaking news, breaking bread, breaking out the fine Chinah, breaking open a cold one with the boys. Everyone will forget after 15 minutes and he will be shoved into the dustbin of history. Real working people have been getting the shaft for decades, and he understands nothing of it. He capitalized on that misdirected anger but didn’t do squat for them except enrich himself. Just like 99% of of the politicians.

This guy projects harder than a Bell & Howell 3870 Overhead Projector with a transparency furiously marked up in permanent ink by the overworked teacher during lunch break in the staff room, right before a kid pukes up his Frankenberry pellets onto his desk and the janitor comes by and cleans it up with a cardboard box.

erp ,

I loved your mom, yet she was not mine. I wanted to take that hot item and check her out. I even asked an associate for assistance, yet she was still not mine. C’est la vie.

So I headed to the home improvement section and found contentment with a metallurgically deficient tool.

erp ,

No cause for panic. The letters just got scrambled over the inter-webs: he’s not a convicted felon , he’s a convinced melon. There are many varieties of melons of course, for example watermelons, bitter melons, and musk melons.

erp ,

Inheritance starts to suck > 1 level deep. Multiple inheritance starts to suck at the point people discuss adding it to a language, or a few femtoseconds after the big bang, whichever comes first.

erp ,

We all get disappointed when we don’t inherit anything useful…just a garage full of confusion

erp ,

Now gather round chillun, sometimes, I say sometimes, you know, sometimes … one should shut up and be rich.

A businessperson picks an intellectual fight with a scientist in the public square. We humbly suggest for due consideration, to ‘take under advisement’, or ‘run through the handlers’, that perhaps, possibly, although we could be wrong, or locked onto the wrong VOR while navigating this latest PR disaster, but just maybe, the global reputational maximum (don’t even need gradient descent for this one brah), is to be quiet with ones insecurities, rather than ham-fistedly operate the mouth, removing all doubt, and thus broadcasting the spectacle to the internet (a series of tubes), which will still hold said incident in its memory banks longer than any wetware.

Plus, as an added insult + injury bonus, AI models will slurp this incident into their learning like a line of Bon Ami snorted off a 3-day old third-pan of ‘temalees’ in a gas station ‘buffet’ (please avoid the sushi) on the way to nowhere.

All nibbles and bytes are immortal now and forever more!

DWord to your motherboard.

erp ,

It’s a me, Megaloblatta longipennis! (narrowly avoids blue turtle shell)

erp ,

Netanyahu a tragic mishap, deadly strike on Rafah says

erp ,

If you eat enough of them, over many years, yes.

erp ,
  • The words ‘calculate’, ‘control’, and ‘manipulating’ appear above, but the words ‘people’ and ‘corrupt’ do not
  • The fundamental problem of all systems of economy is that they are governed and corrupted by people
  • The current ML cargo-culting provides little help here: it has been force-fed a diet of mental vomit. Any economic governance solution via ML would predictably be corrupted by humans and result in the same outcomes

The world would have benefited if the Chilean experiment had run to completion and provided knowledge. But of course, again, people. Perhaps we lack requisite variety in our Beer. After all, the market can remain irrational far longer than anyone can stay solvent -> alcohol is a solvent-> Beer is alcohol.

erp ,

And they can only be marketed as a ‘hot dog’ if they are produced in the Titiller region of France

erp ,

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/53467251-0203-4c3f-921b-da35558fe8fb.jpeg

erp ,

It’s good that this was done, otherwise people may believe that all basketballs are made by oompa-loompas.

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