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How to stop thinking about an interaction from my past?

At the first college I went to, which I later dropped out of because it was austere, cruel, and awful, I went to a little high school tour day thing. They had a seminar for prospective students; one of the faculty talking had people coming up and asking him questions at the end, in a classroom. This was fairly informal, but it had this stuffy bullshit ‘prestigious,’ ‘serious’ academia vibe like, ‘ooh, this school is really tough, gonna be really miserable for you.’

And I asked the speaker at the end, like, ‘So what do computer science majors actually do day to day in classes? Like, what sort of projects do they work on?’ Completely earnestly, because I was curious because I thought it’d be a cool answer. And he literally said to me, ‘That’s really more of a lunchroom question,’ in the most pretentious tone I’ve ever heard in my life. good christ.

And I went to that school! And it was miserable! Honestly, I didn’t even fully understand or realize how utterly rude and pretentious this dude was being to me until recently. I thought I was asking a ‘silly’ question, but NO! NO, absolutely not, it is absolutely a valid question at a college tour day as a little high school kid. And this guy genuinely seemed so offended and put off that I’d dare ask him a silly question, like he was above answering. I genuinely did not have the brainpower at the time to process such an upjumped pretentious moron.

ryathal ,

Forgiveness is how you move past things. Also time helps, but mostly you choose to move on and get over any real or imagined slight. Your anger and resentment only hurts yourself and those close to you.

NeoNachtwaechter ,

Forgiveness is how you move past things.

you choose to move on

This is the truth.

You can make the decision to let him go free, and never bring it up against him anymore. That way you let yourself go free as well.

Frozengyro ,

Seriously, how long has this person been bothered by this? Years?

Boozilla ,
@Boozilla@lemmy.world avatar

You, a kid at the time, understood far more about learning than the pretentious gasbag did. Anyone who would stomp on a good question like that has no business working in education.

Slice ,

Give it the weight it deserves. Some of the other replies here are on point and this interaction doesn’t deserve any negative head space, but bad examples of what not to do are really helpful. You have a chance to choose how to treat people… you bump into friends and strangers every single day. Use the bad examples from your life and the good ones to shape who you are. Aim at the version of yourself who would answer that same question with respect and kindness. Keeping negative things in your head but using them for something positive is the best use of that memory.

Rhynoplaz ,

This post could be what does it. You’ve aired your grievances, and we all agree that guy was a total dick.

The Internet rules in your favor and you are hereby absolved of any liability to let him live rent free in your head.

astraeus ,
@astraeus@programming.dev avatar

Just think of it this way, that dude placed all his eggs in the academic basket and thinks of himself so highly, or has such an inferiority complex, that he patronized a child.

Let it be a lesson that humility goes much further than an inflated ego. He may have tenure but one day he may realize just how many people he let down instead of actually being helpful or useful with the knowledge he amassed.

BackOnMyBS ,
@BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world avatar

He knows he is a disappointment. He just doesn’t want to be confronted with that knowledge to maintain the delusion.

ShustOne ,

This is going to sound vague but I hope it’s somewhat helpful. Make peace with it. Acknowledge what happened, accept that he was rude, and learn from it. It feels like you are already on that road. You recognize now he was being rude, and you feel like you realize the school was too pretentious for you. Take it as a learning moment and look out for it in the future.

mosthated ,
@mosthated@feddit.nl avatar

There are a lot of shit people in this world. Try to minimize your interactions with them. Don’t waste your energy on them.

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