Well I’m night shift so it’s while I’m sleeping. But they can’t just give you a day off either because that would also just solve the real issue. Not that therapy is never necessary, but having worked in mental health 8+ years now, 90% of the time 90% of people just need a damn day off (often more than one). Traumas and chronic dysfunctions will absolutely always exist, but we really need to stop focusing (as much) on the “everybody should go to therapy” side and much more on the “what the fuck are we doing to all of these people that all of them need so much therapy???” side (spoiler: It’s too much work for too little pay, and the rent, as always, is too. damn. high.).
I’ve heard people call these mental health days. At least to friends. Probably not to bosses. It’s good to take one once in a while (if you can) and just chill. I occasionally do so.
I’ll never forget my younger brother saying that in NYC people consider it really weird if you’re not in therapy. I didn’t comment, but that kind of bugged me. I’m all for de-stigmatizing therapy, but that made it sound like it’s some kind of flex to tell people you’re in therapy…?
Yeah to me I see it as the commoditization / paywalling of normal human supportive interaction. Therapy should be there to supplement normal supportive relationships when they’re unavailable to you or you have a large enough stressor in your life that they’re inadequate to help you manage.
I don’t like the idea of moving towards a society where it’s just expected that most truly supportive interactions have a strict professional-client paid relationship instead of a naturally ebbing and flowing give and take between two friends who are close enough. To me that just feels like capitalism further encroaching into my life by tallying up the worth of every interaction I have so they can demand their cut.
I’m already seeing a therapist for my existing severe mental illness through one of those online gig style therapy services because that was the only place I could find any openings, and they’re already taking their cut that way. I can’t imagine choosing this if I wasn’t already someone who had been hospitalized several times. Difficulty sustaining stable interpersonal relationships is literally a key hallmark of my disorder, and if I was better at it I’d much prefer it! (I’m working on it, LOL).
I appreciate you bringing up the money aspects. I have often felt the same way about the ubiquitousness of “just do therapy, bro”. That it’s just another sad aspect of late stage capitalism. It’s my understanding there’s not nearly enough providers to go around, yet the aggressive marketing continues. Because of course it does.
I don’t know if this is true or if it’s just a trope. But I’ve also heard that the field attracts people who usually need help themselves. Not that all therapists are “broken”…but that there’s a percentage who are. So on top of finding an available one at all, you hope you land a good one. Hopefully that’s just a BS stereotype.
It’s not even the "needs help themselves aspect. That screws them, they say most psych nurses are crazy too, it’s whether they’ve done the work on it, and I think you’d find similar levels of low competence from somebody who just didn’t pay enough attention in school (AND they wouldn’t have the life experience to know what they’re talking about).
The other thing you mentioned: not having close friends and non-professional relationships. I think that’s very true. A lot of people are isolated these days. And many friends will keep you at arm’s length. They are happy to hang out. But if you start to open up too much, they will start to avoid you. Anything that smells remotely “clingy” is a big no-no. They’d rather look at screens than engage in real talk.
But your job offered it which means it’s ok to use during working hours and get paid for it. If my job offered free lunch you can be damn sure I will eat it during my work day.
The system is set up such that if you lose your job you lose your health insurance, for you and your children.
And if you miss a paycheck you’re toast. Probable eviction notice in the future. Paycheck to paycheck living is real, even more so in the post 2020 world.
American here: worked jobs from digging ditches to writing software… This only happens if you let it.
If it’s offered and it’s free, check the times with the boss, if a reasonable reschedule (like "I’d really like you with me in a meeting at 10, can you take the 11 appt? Sure.) , Do it. Else, keep the appt and have your employment docs on hand for reference as needed.
I got smoked out of a company I helped found because I had health issues, even though I was still capable of doing my job. It’s illegal to fire people for health issues here, but it’s not like firing someone is the only way to get rid of them.
Everybody who’s telling you you can legally use these appointments is probably completely correct (depending on your jurisdiction). Whether the legality actually matters is another thing entirely.
The issue lays not with legality (it’s obviously illegal), but with a person’s (financial) ability to pursue legal recourse.
BUT, finances aside, people should always document everything. In person meeting or phone call? Follow up with an email recapping what was discussed. Make sure to take notes so you’re not relying solely on your memory.
Look for lawyers who would be willing to work on contingency. This is where they get paid when you get paid. If you have some money saved, you might be able to get away with retaining the lawyer.
Obviously a lot of people cannot afford a lawyer, and that’s a damn shame. Companies count on this fact and use it against their employees. But by documenting everything, you at least send a message to the company that you’re willing to fight back and that maybe enough in some cases to deter them (a long shot).
Also check with your state’s labor board to see what, if any, resources are available for workers in these type of cases.
I guess you could ask the question of someone (line manager most likely) - "Hey I saw that all these appointments are in working hours - does that mean I’m meant to take them during work time? How does it work?” - ie just play innocent and at least get clarity from them on what they understand it to mean.
Which naturally means it’s impossible for it to be an issue for literally anybody else anywhere at any time
And no, before some dumb fuck has any bright ideas, I’m not saying this will be an issue for everybody, just that it’s absolutely fucking idiotic to pretend it’s never an issue.
Read the fine print too, a lot of these “mental health counseling services” have carve outs that stipulate that they can pass along data about your sessions to third parties (like your employer.) Most of them aren’t health care professionals so health care law doesn’t apply.
Everything HR does is for the benefit of the company. They do not do anything to genuinely help employees. You are a replaceable cog and the moment they decide you’re not useful, you will be tossed out. Never trust them or the structures they put in place.
I mean, just schedule the appointment, put it on your work schedule, and ask that doctor (or whatever you call them) for a note for work. That’s what I do.
If any of my reports told me they booked an appointment through the health care we provided and it was during the work day I’d just say okay, mark it out on your calendar as busy so I don’t bug you or expect anything from you during that time. If they need to account for all their time like some roles, bill it as admin time.
Not sure how it holds up legally… But I am very strongly of the option that If my health care is tied to my employment, then anything healthcare related is work related.
I only make calls for this shit on the clock. I haven’t pushed not using sick time yet, but I will once I get the WFH shit sorted.
My workplace offers a mental health benefit similar to this, we inform HR that we’ve scheduled a mental health appointment during work, tell our manager that we’re stepping away for an hour, and then return to work after the appointment. It would be a good idea to ask someone in your company how to use your benefit.
I’ll be the first person to remind you that HR is not your friend, but this is exactly what they exist for
No idea where you are or what the labour laws or union situation are. But where I work, a consultation like that is a doctor’s appointment and can therefore be taken as medical leave during working hours.
Depends on their contract and how many paid/unpaid leave they still have. I know someone who has already spent all of their leave this year and won’t be able to just take a day off (unless it’s special leave like a doctor’s visit or certain funerals, of course).
OP should probably talk to their employer about this or read the company handbook. I suspect they can request special leave to use this service, but if it’s not considered a “normal” doctor’s visit, there may be special rules (i.e. not planning appointments during important meetings).
Refusing OP would be pretty stupid, because OP can also go through the regular medical system and that won’t be online, and requires a GP referral, so any psychiatric help they may require through that system will cost at least twice the amount of time compared to giving an hour or so off to use the company system. In most companies I know of, there are rules about special leave that would entitle OP to leave beyond their normal time off to visit their doctor(s).
Yeah sorry, that’s what I meant, they’re entitled to take special leave to go to this appointment. But it seems OP has already decided that they will be punished somehow for doing so
Everybody who keeps saying “just go” seems to be assuming that OP works in an office job where you can just come back and finish your work after your appointment.
What if they’re an air traffic controller, they’re operating factory equipment, monitoring a nuclear reactor, etc. Some jobs require a person to be present and attentive. Now they have to talk to their manager, find someone to cover for them, etc. Mental health treatment should be easily available without having to jump through hoops. I understand their frustration.
Book the time as an appointment or consultation and just go. If your direct line manager makes a fuss, tell them it’s a doctor’s appointment. If you’ve got far enough that you recognise that you need help, just go ahead and do it.
Based on the text in your image i assume that you live in the Netherlands. I would advise you to discuss this with your employer. As you are unable to plan a needed psychiatric appointment during working hours you have the right to take some short leave time for that.