My best friend in elementary school was born at the same hospital just one day before me. We lived in a small town so I probably would’ve met any others but I thought that was crazy when we figured that out.
My old person trait is that when I purchase a printer, I should be able to use whatever is the cheapest compatible ink without the printer treating me like I’m smuggling unicorn blood out of Narnia
As someone who works in a call center, screw that last person on here. So sorry you hate the automated system. Sorry you had to wait on hold. They can’t keep enough of us employed because y’all are fucking mean and no one wants to be abused for $15/hr.
Er, I mean, Thank you for calling, sorry about your wait!
Don’t you think you could both be victims? Waiting for ages listening to a 13 second loop of music interspersed with “your call is important to us” might make people a bit more angry?
You should be mad at the people who gain financially from it, and could make it better for you and the customers, but might have to skip that third yacht for little Timmy.
I don’t have notification enabled on most of my apps. I will check on them when I want, but I hate seeing or hearing notifications because they are distracting me. If something is urgent, call me, otherwise it can wait.
For the people who don’t want to squint at a weird format image:
Communism: You have two cows. The state takes both and gives you some milk
Fascism: You have two cows. The state takes both and sells you some milk (someone here has a very benign definition of fascism)
Socialism: You have two cows. You give one to your neighbor who had none.
Bureaucratism: You have two cows. The state takes both, kills one, milks the other and then throws the milk away.
Tradition Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one to buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the profit.
Venture Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother in law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option to buy one more.
French Corporation: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want two.
Italian Corporation: You have two cows. You don’t know where they are. You decide to have lunch
Swiss Corporation: You have 500 cows. None of them belong to you. You just charge for storing them.
American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one and force the other to produce milk like 4 cows. You hire an independent consultant to determine why the cow died.
Indian Company: You have 2 cows. You worship them.
Irish Company: You have 2 cows. One of them is a horse.
Australian Company: You have 2 cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
Iraqi Company. You have no cows. Noone believes you. The US bombs the crap out of you and invades your country. You still have no cows but at least you have a democracy now.
British Company: You have 2 cows. Both are mad.
Greek Company: You have 2 cows borrowed from French and German banks. You eath both. The banks call to collect their milk but you cannot deliver. The IMF loans you 2 cows. You eat both. The banks and the IMF call to collect their milk. You’re out getting a haircut.
Chinese Company: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment and max bovine productivity. You arrest the journalist who reported the real situation.
If you put something in my mailbox, where it is explicitly labelled that your unregistered shit is unwelcome. I will come out and find your parked car.
Did you think your stupid shit was that important? If I am selling my house I will never use Ben Gow. Or any of the others that are too stupid to read. Those people who cannot read basic requests - “NO JUNKMAIL” meaning your advertising shit, are not going to get used.
You will never get commission (or a purchase) you dumbshit losers, too dumb to read a mailbox sign, your definately too stupid to be given the risk of selling my asset.
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